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  #1  
Old 05-04-2013, 01:43 PM
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Default How Do I Leave a Group?

I have been member of this daycare for more than two years. I have decided that I am leaving this group and will not come back. Daycare.com is not worth my time.

Thank you!
  #2  
Old 05-04-2013, 02:30 PM
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If you are referring to a social group, just PM the owner of the group and they can delete you from the group.

If you are referring to the forum in general, the only way to leave is to simply stop visiting the site.

Your account cannot be deleted as it will effect the forum in general as far as post count, quotes and threads you are a part of.

I am sorry you feel that this forum is not for you. If you are having a specific issue that can be addressed, please PM one of the moderators or Michael and I am sure that any of them will be happy to help you out, myself included.

Definitely hope you will reconsider.
  #3  
Old 05-04-2013, 02:37 PM
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The easiest way to stop participating in a forum or a portion of a forum is to stop visiting it.
  #4  
Old 05-04-2013, 02:43 PM
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Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist View Post
The easiest way to stop participating in a forum or a portion of a forum is to stop visiting it.


There is really no need to officially leave the forum, you could just not visit anymore.
  #5  
Old 05-04-2013, 03:26 PM
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there are two ways to leave a group you make a lot of drama stating you are leaving and never coming back though usually you do not do it as a guest. You need to do it so everyone can beg you to stay

or you just unbookmark it on your computer and just stop checking in to the forum.
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  #6  
Old 05-04-2013, 03:39 PM
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I really don't see how Daycare.com could be "not worth someone's time". Sure, I don't agree with everything that goes on here. But thier is no law saying I have to do things the way they are being suggested on the forum. Odd post!
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  #7  
Old 05-04-2013, 03:44 PM
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Originally Posted by itlw8 View Post
there are two ways to leave a group you make a lot of drama stating you are leaving and never coming back though usually you do not do it as a guest. You need to do it so everyone can beg you to stay

or you just unbookmark it on your computer and just stop checking in to the forum.


After every big thread that goes bad someone dramatically announces they are leaving...and then comes back a few weeks later.
  #8  
Old 05-04-2013, 04:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Hunni Bee View Post


After every big thread that goes bad someone dramatically announces they are leaving...and then comes back a few weeks later.
  #9  
Old 05-04-2013, 04:24 PM
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How odd!! Just don't check in any more. Simple as that.
  #10  
Old 05-04-2013, 05:05 PM
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The only advice I have is to please stay in contact with your friends on here either through email, text or messenger

I think most of the ladies here are genuine and loving friends
I think everyone needs to read posts 3 different ways..lets say you are at the store and some lady comes up to you and says:

"Hey nice hat" (snarky)
"Hey nice hat" ( lovingly)
"Hey nice hat" ( laughing)

in person, you can tell by the tone of voice what they mean..
but online... you can't ..so just give people the benefit of doubt
I joke around a lot and my kids friends say I am lovingly sarcastic..
After some time, members will get to know each others personalities and there would not be so much drama on here if people didn't want to pick each other apart

I hope you can stay and give us another chance!
  #11  
Old 05-04-2013, 06:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by itlw8 View Post
there are two ways to leave a group you make a lot of drama stating you are leaving and never coming back though usually you do not do it as a guest. You need to do it so everyone can beg you to stay

or you just unbookmark it on your computer and just stop checking in to the forum.
  #12  
Old 05-05-2013, 05:39 AM
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I just want to say that your a coward for not posting under your handle and asking a dumb question. Really seems to me like you want to stir the pot. Thats fine if you want to leave, because if you needed to post as unregistered then your opinion doesn't matter to me.
  #13  
Old 05-05-2013, 05:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by registered View Post
I have been member of this daycare for more than two years. I have decided that I am leaving this group and will not come back. Daycare.com is not worth my time.

Thank you!
If this group isn't worth your time simply stop visiting it. I see no reason to basically ask permission. Not trying to sound nasty, but it seems to make the most sense to me.
  #14  
Old 05-05-2013, 06:52 AM
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I am kind of surprised at some of the responses.

The poster asked a simple question that was answered.

The negativity is not necessary. I can understand her reasons.

Sure hope it's the weather or time of year or something because usually the members of the board are warm, supportive and helpful.


Last edited by Blackcat31; 05-05-2013 at 09:17 AM.
  #15  
Old 05-05-2013, 09:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by countrymom View Post
I just want to say that your a coward for not posting under your handle and asking a dumb question. Really seems to me like you want to stir the pot. Thats fine if you want to leave, because if you needed to post as unregistered then your opinion doesn't matter to me.
This seems unnecessary to me and quite possibly an example of the negative behavior that's been going on in this forum.
  #16  
Old 05-05-2013, 09:15 AM
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Im sorry. I usually dont reply negatively, even to negative threads. But the one thing I hate is when people intentionally try dig at other people. I guess we all love this forum and it hurt our feelings for someone to insult it or imply we aren't worth their time.

I apologize to the OP if I was rude.
  #17  
Old 05-05-2013, 10:54 AM
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wow...just wow...
  #18  
Old 05-05-2013, 01:58 PM
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Originally Posted by craftymissbeth View Post
This seems unnecessary to me and quite possibly an example of the negative behavior that's been going on in this forum.
I've been on parenting (and still am) sites where people like this post. Its like a game, they post as anon then stir the pot and then never leave. And on the one site (its a local site) we even have a policy about it. It got so bad with people posting about leaving and then wanted a reaction from everyone that it got ugly. So now when you want to leave, you either just leave (duh common sense) or just post a "im leaving" but you post with your handle. and it gets closed right away and their account gets deleted. It makes me mad because its a game and they want to see our responses because if it was true and they really wanted to leave then why didn't they post in their name on the forum, so you know that they are still hanging around, lurking. Sorry I'm not that nieve. and if you really wanted to leave why wouldn't you just stop posting. So I do hope the mods know who this person is and delete thier accounts so this way we won't have someone trying to stir the pot.
  #19  
Old 05-05-2013, 02:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by countrymom View Post
I've been on parenting (and still am) sites where people like this post. Its like a game, they post as anon then stir the pot and then never leave. And on the one site (its a local site) we even have a policy about it. It got so bad with people posting about leaving and then wanted a reaction from everyone that it got ugly. So now when you want to leave, you either just leave (duh common sense) or just post a "im leaving" but you post with your handle. and it gets closed right away and their account gets deleted. It makes me mad because its a game and they want to see our responses because if it was true and they really wanted to leave then why didn't they post in their name on the forum, so you know that they are still hanging around, lurking. Sorry I'm not that nieve. and if you really wanted to leave why wouldn't you just stop posting. So I do hope the mods know who this person is and delete thier accounts so this way we won't have someone trying to stir the pot.
Ok, gotcha
  #20  
Old 05-05-2013, 02:38 PM
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This kinda reminds me of what some members on here say about the parents who deliberately try to rile up the kids when they leave by making a big production when the kids are perfectly fine and so the kids start begging for their parents to stay and the parent feels better about themselves that the kid misses them.
  #21  
Old 05-05-2013, 05:19 PM
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I smelled a troll the second I read this. Funny thing is: we keep on feeding them.

If we ignore controversial topics (don't forget the old threads that are brought back up by unregistered!) then maybe perhaps the trolls will find something else better to do.

ETA: I stand corrected. The OP IS indeed a true member. Sorry OP for calling you a troll!

Last edited by Former Teacher; 05-05-2013 at 05:21 PM.
  #22  
Old 05-05-2013, 05:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelle View Post
The only advice I have is to please stay in contact with your friends on here either through email, text or messenger

I think most of the ladies here are genuine and loving friends
I think everyone needs to read posts 3 different ways..lets say you are at the store and some lady comes up to you and says:

"Hey nice hat" (snarky)
"Hey nice hat" ( lovingly)
"Hey nice hat" ( laughing)

in person, you can tell by the tone of voice what they mean..
but online... you can't ..so just give people the benefit of doubt
I joke around a lot and my kids friends say I am lovingly sarcastic..
After some time, members will get to know each others personalities and there would not be so much drama on here if people didn't want to pick each other apart

I hope you can stay and give us another chance!
I'm snarky so always read my posts as snarky!
  #23  
Old 05-05-2013, 06:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care View Post
I'm snarky so always read my posts as snarky!

I actually have never heard that word before until I came here

  #24  
Old 05-05-2013, 06:43 PM
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snarky = cheeky, playful bantering? dunno

Last edited by Michelle; 05-06-2013 at 10:41 AM. Reason: bantering I mean.. man I can't think sometimes
  #25  
Old 05-05-2013, 06:48 PM
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Snarky = Cheeky in my book.
  #26  
Old 05-05-2013, 06:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care View Post
Snarky = Cheeky in my book.
ditto
  #27  
Old 05-06-2013, 07:51 AM
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I wish that this site was more supportive at times, instead of criticizing each other just offer support instead. We all make mistakes and even though I have been doing this for 22 years I still learn things from others here. This is a very frustrating job and providers can feel isolated at times.

But I agree, if you do not feel this site is worthy of your time then just don't come here. No announcement needed.
  #28  
Old 05-06-2013, 08:00 AM
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Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady View Post
I wish that this site was more supportive at times, instead of criticizing each other just offer support instead. We all make mistakes and even though I have been doing this for 22 years I still learn things from others here. This is a very frustrating job and providers can feel isolated at times.
It is VERY hard to be supportive at times when it seems there is always someone who is offended by something you say, imply or sometimes don't even say but others think you meant.

Rather than this board being MORE supportive, I think it needs to be LESS sensitive about everything and not always assume everything is personal or a dig at them....kwim ?

Last edited by Michael; 05-07-2013 at 11:33 PM.
  #29  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:19 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
It is VERY hard to be supportive at times when it seems there is always someone who is offended by something you say, imply or sometimes don't even say but others think you meant.

Rather than this board being MORE supportive, I think it needs to be LESS sensitive about everything and not always assume everything is personal or a dig at them....kwim ?

Last edited by Michael; 05-07-2013 at 11:33 PM.
  #30  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:27 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
It is VERY hard to be supportive at times when it seems there is always someone who is offended by something you say, imply or sometimes don't even say but others think you meant.

Rather than this board being MORE supportive, I think it needs to be LESS sensitive about everything and not always assume everything is personal or a dig at them....kwim ?

Last edited by Michael; 05-07-2013 at 11:33 PM.
  #31  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
It is VERY hard to be supportive at times when it seems there is always someone who is offended by something you say, imply or sometimes don't even say but others think you meant.

Rather than this board being MORE supportive, I think it needs to be LESS sensitive about everything and not always assume everything is personal or a dig at them....kwim ?
Yes agree on the sensitive thing. like last week when the post was made about the psycho dcb, who cares what was used in the title. Because if I met some of you in person you would probably call your dck's by other names lol! so why can't we post about how we really feel. Why can't we argue, even after the whole post with michelle (sorry have to use you as an example) she still stayed on, the thread is now forgotten and we all move on.

And I love how crazy this board gets, sometimes its so nice to argue and
makes me feel better, thats life, if you are so sensitive over every little thing, then I really question how you provide care for children who can push buttons.

And this is a place where there are normal people, its rare that you find fake people on this board. Sure there is drama, but it aint any worse than some of the drama the parents bring. If you can't express how you really truley feel on this board well then there really isn't a need for a board.

Last edited by Michael; 05-07-2013 at 11:33 PM.
  #32  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:49 AM
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like last week when the post was made about the psycho dcb, who cares what was used in the title.

PERFECT example.

People should have taken into context the poster. She was a regular member who most of us know to have loving, caring and professional posts.

I HIGHLY doubt she was trying to be offensive when she titled her thread the way she did.

Now had an unregistered posted said something similar, it would have been hard to make the distinction between being funny, snarky or for real because we don't know most "unregistered" posters.

I think everyone needs to lighten up a bit and learn to go with the flow....life is so much more fun, enjoyable and positive if you learn to roll with it!
  #33  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:53 AM
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Wow, I didn't expect that. I don't mean to cause drama but I just asked a simply question. Two years ago, I came here for support and I feel things didn't work out the way I had hoped. I'm truly apologizing for any frustrations I have caused here. It is time for me to move on.

Blackcat, I want to say thank you for your answer and understand my reasons.

Take care and God Bless.....
  #34  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:07 AM
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Originally Posted by registered View Post
Wow, I didn't expect that. I don't mean to cause drama but I just asked a simply question. Two years ago, I came here for support and I feel things didn't work out the way I had hoped. I'm truly apologizing for any frustrations I have caused here. It is time for me to move on.

Blackcat, I want to say thank you for your answer and understand my reasons.

Take care and God Bless.....
Sorry to see you go. Hopefully things will calm down or a break is what you needed and eventually you return.

I think the original question was a legit one, the op was asking about the groups not forum. There's no "leave group" option that I've seen, so it wasn't as if op was out of line or asking about the forum.

Anyway best of luck op!
  #35  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:11 AM
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Originally Posted by registered View Post
Wow, I didn't expect that. I don't mean to cause drama but I just asked a simply question. Two years ago, I came here for support and I feel things didn't work out the way I had hoped. I'm truly apologizing for any frustrations I have caused here. It is time for me to move on.

Blackcat, I want to say thank you for your answer and understand my reasons.

Take care and God Bless.....
I know why you felt the need to want to leave but I do wish you would reconsider. You have always been a positive contributor to the forum and even if you don't get much from it, you surely give twice as much!

I do understand though if you still choose to leave. I will be sad though to see you go.
  #36  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:32 AM
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I think everyone needs to lighten up a bit and learn to go with the flow....life is so much more fun, enjoyable and positive if you learn to roll with it!
Yes, this sounds great!
  #37  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:37 AM
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Yes agree on the sensitive thing. like last week when the post was made about the psycho dcb, who cares what was used in the title. Because if I met some of you in person you would probably call your dck's by other names lol! so why can't we post about how we really feel. Why can't we argue, even after the whole post with michelle (sorry have to use you as an example) she still stayed on, the thread is now forgotten and we all move on.

And I love how crazy this board gets, sometimes its so nice to argue and
makes me feel better, thats life, if you are so sensitive over every little thing, then I really question how you provide care for children who can push buttons.

And this is a place where there are normal people, its rare that you find fake people on this board. Sure there is drama, but it aint any worse than some of the drama the parents bring. If you can't express how you really truley feel on this board well then there really isn't a need for a board.
I agree with this..
I like real providers who have real problems and talk about how their dck's really are ...nobody has perfect kids,home,spouses,daycares,moods,feelings, and lives.
I think most providers has experienced the three kids throwing their food,then someone slips on the food, then that person drops whatever was in their hands on Sally then Sally is crying and then food throwers are crying because they want their food, then a parent walks in at that exact moment...of course
Let's get real and supportive and laughing again like we used to be.
  #38  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by registered View Post
Wow, I didn't expect that. I don't mean to cause drama but I just asked a simply question. Two years ago, I came here for support and I feel things didn't work out the way I had hoped. I'm truly apologizing for any frustrations I have caused here. It is time for me to move on.

Blackcat, I want to say thank you for your answer and understand my reasons.

Take care and God Bless.....
I always read about coming here for support. I have never thought of this site as a support site. That's a narrow view.

I think it's a universal site where ALL things daycare are discussed. Sometimes supportive but a discussion board first and foremost.

Maybe I'm wrong. I see WAY too much support here when support should NOT be given. Support can be a dangerous thing... dangerous to kids. Use it wisely.
  #39  
Old 05-06-2013, 11:57 AM
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Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
I always read about coming here for support. I have never thought of this site as a support site. That's a narrow view.

I think it's a universal site where ALL things daycare are discussed. Sometimes supportive but a discussion board first and foremost.

Maybe I'm wrong. I see WAY too much support here when support should NOT be given. Support can be a dangerous thing... dangerous to kids. Use it wisely.
Can you explain yourself more please? I agree about it being a universal site, but the bolded part I am a bit fuzzy on....think I get what your saying but just want to clearify.

I personally come here for many reasons.....

ideas

questions, helps,information

to give advice. I like helping others and have been doing this for many years in different venues. The advice I give is always take it or leave it advice, because we are all unique in what we do and how we do it.

isolation from other adults during the day

views of other people, women.

boredom

many of you have become "friends" that I will never see but I think about and care, esp those that put it out there.

support, no matter if it is support I want to hear or support I don't want to hear. It still makes me think

worldly news- how to handle my pent up feelings on different things that have happened......examples- the school shooting, the Boston Marathon

Drama- I get sucked up into the drama debates just as much as everyone else does. I try not to but I do.

Personal growth.

#1 reason is my kiddo's. I want to be the best daycare I can be to these kids.
  #40  
Old 05-06-2013, 12:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelle View Post
The only advice I have is to please stay in contact with your friends on here either through email, text or messenger

I think most of the ladies here are genuine and loving friends
I think everyone needs to read posts 3 different ways..lets say you are at the store and some lady comes up to you and says:

"Hey nice hat" (snarky)
"Hey nice hat" ( lovingly)
"Hey nice hat" ( laughing)

in person, you can tell by the tone of voice what they mean..
but online... you can't ..so just give people the benefit of doubt
I joke around a lot and my kids friends say I am lovingly sarcastic..
After some time, members will get to know each others personalities and there would not be so much drama on here if people didn't want to pick each other apart

I hope you can stay and give us another chance!
This is SO true! I'm guilty of this and this has also happened to me. Just last week I posted a question and something someone said could be construed as rude so I commented that it was rude, but it turns out they didn't mean to sound rude. Also, someone on here has taken something that I have said the wrong way, I was being nice, but they thought otherwise and that person never responds to anything I say anymore. But with all the members on here and all the different personalities, it's bound to happen although I wish it didn't!
  #41  
Old 05-06-2013, 12:54 PM
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I still don't really get this post? I mean I do but I don't If a person decides to leave the forum and wants people to know then they would have posted under their user name. If they decided to leave and didn't want people to talk about it they would have just PM'd a moderator, after being on the site for 2 years they would know how to do that. I'm sure Blackcat knows who the poster is and it must make sense to her
  #42  
Old 05-06-2013, 01:14 PM
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Originally Posted by NeedaVaca View Post
I'm sure Blackcat knows who the poster is and it must make sense to her
It does.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NeedaVaca View Post
I still don't really get this post? I mean I do but I don't If a person decides to leave the forum and wants people to know then they would have posted under their user name. If they decided to leave and didn't want people to talk about it they would have just PM'd a moderator, after being on the site for 2 years they would know how to do that.
Some people have been members here for a long time but that doesn't mean they are avid posters or even visit the site regularly.

Members come from all areas of the world and from all walks of life so not everyone understands how forums work or that accounts can't be deleted, modified or closed.

I've talk to members who have been here awhile and still don't know how to use PM or other functions of the forum that some of us use regularly or understand easily...kwim?

Some people also choose to navigate the forum in a different manner than others.

For example, did you know that you can choose to have posts appear on your screen in linear form with the oldest threads appearing first. Or linear with the newest threads shown first.

You can also have a signature or a different avatar than the ones provided.
You can put people on your ignore list and this stops them from PM'ing you and makes their posts invisible to you.

You can also make it so that your "appearance" on line is invisible to others as if you aren't on-line or logged in at all.

You can subscribe to threads via e-mail or PM. You can also dictate how many posts show up on one page at a time.

There are many options to the forum that most members don't utilize or even know how to work them...some don't even know those options are there at all so........

Not everyone walks in the same pair of shoes and sometimes, it is necessary to simply ask.

NOTHING wrong with that IMHO.
  #43  
Old 05-06-2013, 02:44 PM
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Originally Posted by My3cents View Post
Can you explain yourself more please? I agree about it being a universal site, but the bolded part I am a bit fuzzy on....think I get what your saying but just want to clearify.

I personally come here for many reasons.....

ideas

questions, helps,information

to give advice. I like helping others and have been doing this for many years in different venues. The advice I give is always take it or leave it advice, because we are all unique in what we do and how we do it.

isolation from other adults during the day

views of other people, women.

boredom

many of you have become "friends" that I will never see but I think about and care, esp those that put it out there.

support, no matter if it is support I want to hear or support I don't want to hear. It still makes me think

worldly news- how to handle my pent up feelings on different things that have happened......examples- the school shooting, the Boston Marathon

Drama- I get sucked up into the drama debates just as much as everyone else does. I try not to but I do.

Personal growth.

#1 reason is my kiddo's. I want to be the best daycare I can be to these kids.
I am guilty of MANY of these

That being said: I am here all the time, I just don't log in that much. Nothing personal. It's just that sometimes things are better left unsaid

I will try to post more often. I do love you all
  #44  
Old 05-06-2013, 03:35 PM
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Is anyone else a little put off by the moderators letting forum users know that they know who everyone is? I know some people on the forum let everyone know who they are and are cool with that, but I think the majority of people on here would like to be able to post anonymously. I read at least a few posts a week where regular users sign out for privacy when discussing a sensitive matter and a few posts a week posted by unregistered or guests that are legitimate posts. I respect their right to be privacy and I don't like reading over and over again that "we know who they are." The way it is done sounds rude and condescending.
  #45  
Old 05-06-2013, 03:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanna View Post
Is anyone else a little put off by the moderators letting forum users know that they know who everyone is? I know some people on the forum let everyone know who they are and are cool with that, but I think the majority of people on here would like to be able to post anonymously. I read at least a few posts a week where regular users sign out for privacy when discussing a sensitive matter and a few posts a week posted by unregistered or guests that are legitimate posts. I respect their right to be privacy and I don't like reading over and over again that "we know who they are." The way it is done sounds rude and condescending.
I agree 10000000000%
  #46  
Old 05-06-2013, 03:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanna View Post
Is anyone else a little put off by the moderators letting forum users know that they know who everyone is? I know some people on the forum let everyone know who they are and are cool with that, but I think the majority of people on here would like to be able to post anonymously. I read at least a few posts a week where regular users sign out for privacy when discussing a sensitive matter and a few posts a week posted by unregistered or guests that are legitimate posts. I respect their right to be privacy and I don't like reading over and over again that "we know who they are." The way it is done sounds rude and condescending.
My reply to Needavac was NOT meant to sound rude or condescending.

I am sorry if you felt it read that way.

She stated that I probably knew who it was and it (the OP's post) must make sense to me and I simply replied that is does.

IMO, I don't see how that comes across as rude and condescending at all.

I most certainly would NEVER give up who an unregistered poster is and would NEVER violate that kind of privacy. EVER.

I have also NEVER advertised that mods know who unregistered posters are although it does and has come up within a thread.

......and in all honesty, we don't ALWAYS know.

It isn't like there is a big flashing neon sign saying so.

I also don't see where moderator's are advertising that they know who unregistered poster are.

This is a public forum and in reality, there really is no such thing as internet privacy.
  #47  
Old 05-06-2013, 04:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
My reply to Needavac was NOT meant to sound rude or condescending.

I am sorry if you felt it read that way.

She stated that I probably knew who it was and it (the OP's post) must make sense to me and I simply replied that is does.

IMO, I don't see how that comes across as rude and condescending at all.

I most certainly would NEVER give up who an unregistered poster is and would NEVER violate that kind of privacy. EVER.

I have also NEVER advertised that mods know who unregistered posters are although it does and has come up within a thread.

......and in all honesty, we don't ALWAYS know.

It isn't like there is a big flashing neon sign saying so.

I also don't see where moderator's are advertising that they know who unregistered poster are.

This is a public forum and in reality, there really is no such thing as internet privacy.
Blackcat-just so you know, I didn't think your post was rude or condescending towards me Just a reminder that all people are not computer/internet savvy & maybe some people don't realize all the forum has to offer which was why the OP posted a thread about leaving instead of PM'ing you.
  #48  
Old 05-06-2013, 04:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanna View Post
Is anyone else a little put off by the moderators letting forum users know that they know who everyone is? I know some people on the forum let everyone know who they are and are cool with that, but I think the majority of people on here would like to be able to post anonymously. I read at least a few posts a week where regular users sign out for privacy when discussing a sensitive matter and a few posts a week posted by unregistered or guests that are legitimate posts. I respect their right to be privacy and I don't like reading over and over again that "we know who they are." The way it is done sounds rude and condescending.
Sounds like somebody is offended. Why does everything have to bother somebody? Dont post if you r worried about privacy. I never assum anything on the internet is private and definately not public forums.
Even if i post as my username or unregistered... My username isnt the real me either so i dont see what difference it makes. The best way to protect yourself is dont post personal stuff
  #49  
Old 05-06-2013, 04:45 PM
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Last week it came up "Providers using Prescription Drugs" thread that it is not that hard for mods to figure out who the unregistered people are that are posting. A couple post on this actually were in that thread.

Another member said that they would leave if their information was ever given out or something along that lines.

I think that is were the mods knowing our information is coming from possibly.

http://daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=62034

Last edited by Country Kids; 05-06-2013 at 06:10 PM. Reason: Forgot to add thread
  #50  
Old 05-06-2013, 08:18 PM
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sigh
I think we all need to get together, go on a cruise,have the time of our lives,laugh,dance, and get to know each other and then come back on here.
I guarantee there would be no more fighting or attacking on this board.

3 importants things to remember that I have learned:
1. don't assume a post is negative..you don't know the tone
2. don't gang up on a member.....(maybe ask her in a pm if there is something going on today) she might have had a death in the family or trouble with a teen..or her dh
3. not everyone does things the same way and there is nothing wrong with that!
( I have learned that people can take the bus with kids and be safe doing it)
I have always been terrified of the bus and have not been on one in 25 years!

I hate it when people fight, I hate it when someone gets ganged up on and I hate it when someone on this board tells a member to go ahead and leave and act like they won't be missed!
We are care givers and I emphasize the word care
  #51  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:01 PM
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LOL... see if this was a board full of men this whole topic would have ended like twenty posts ago. :P
__________________
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Acts 13:22
  #52  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dave4him View Post
LOL... see if this was a board full of men this whole topic would have ended like twenty posts ago. :P
That is so not true . My DH participates with a couple of forums and those guys are worse than any group of women .
  #53  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:10 PM
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I'm curious as to who all the moderators are, and exactly what member information they have access to?

It seems like there are quite a few moderators here.
  #54  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAngels View Post
I'm curious as to who all the moderators are, and exactly what member information they have access to?

It seems like there are quite a few moderators here.
This is a great question... considering how on most forums I've been on the moderators are clearly labeled as moderators. It's usually next to their username when they post.
  #55  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:26 PM
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The ones I know off the top of my head are:

BlackCat
Daycare
Silversabre
Former Schoolteacher

I think maybe one more but not sure-

Sorry if I missed anyone!
  #56  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanna View Post
Is anyone else a little put off by the moderators letting forum users know that they know who everyone is? I know some people on the forum let everyone know who they are and are cool with that, but I think the majority of people on here would like to be able to post anonymously. I read at least a few posts a week where regular users sign out for privacy when discussing a sensitive matter and a few posts a week posted by unregistered or guests that are legitimate posts. I respect their right to be privacy and I don't like reading over and over again that "we know who they are." The way it is done sounds rude and condescending.
Yep....
  #57  
Old 05-06-2013, 09:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
My reply to Needavac was NOT meant to sound rude or condescending.

I am sorry if you felt it read that way.

She stated that I probably knew who it was and it (the OP's post) must make sense to me and I simply replied that is does.

IMO, I don't see how that comes across as rude and condescending at all.

I most certainly would NEVER give up who an unregistered poster is and would NEVER violate that kind of privacy. EVER.

I have also NEVER advertised that mods know who unregistered posters are although it does and has come up within a thread.

......and in all honesty, we don't ALWAYS know.

It isn't like there is a big flashing neon sign saying so.

I also don't see where moderator's are advertising that they know who unregistered poster are.

This is a public forum and in reality, there really is no such thing as internet privacy.
I completely believe you when you say you would never reveal someone's identity. The following is not necessarily directed at Blackcat, as I can't remember who the mod was that I'm about to talk about, and it doesn't matter. Actually, I couldn't even tell you offhand who the mods even are!

Ok, while I wouldn't use the words "rude" and "condescending", necessarily, it did strike me as a tad bit cringe-worthy on a past thread (sorry, cannot for the life of me remember the topic, but it was within the last couple weeks... I think?) when a mod went on and on (in MY opinion it was on and on... I'm sure the mod didn't feel like it was) about how, with research and some sleuthing, they can figure out who an anonymous poster is.

I was almost embarrassed for "Anonymous" by it all. Who cares??!!?? Congratulations that you have that power, but it really shined a bright light in Anonymous's face and, I bet, made the majority of readers very curious as to who she was. Probably to the point of PM'ing a mod to ask if she'd spill the beans.

We shouldn't focus on trying to see behind their mask. That isn't why they asked a question or brought up a subject. If I posted something anonymously, it would really embarrass me to know that the mods were checking me out trying to discover my hidden identity. Give them the privacy they are clearly asking for.

I didn't want to say anything at the time, but since someone brought it up here, I know I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

Off the soapbox. Just wanted to say what I felt, that's all.
  #58  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucy View Post
I completely believe you when you say you would never reveal someone's identity. The following is not necessarily directed at Blackcat, as I can't remember who the mod was that I'm about to talk about, and it doesn't matter. Actually, I couldn't even tell you offhand who the mods even are!

Ok, while I wouldn't use the words "rude" and "condescending", necessarily, it did strike me as a tad bit cringe-worthy on a past thread (sorry, cannot for the life of me remember the topic, but it was within the last couple weeks... I think?) when a mod went on and on (in MY opinion it was on and on... I'm sure the mod didn't feel like it was) about how, with research and some sleuthing, they can figure out who an anonymous poster is.

I was almost embarrassed for "Anonymous" by it all. Who cares??!!?? Congratulations that you have that power, but it really shined a bright light in Anonymous's face and, I bet, made the majority of reader's very curious as to who she was. Probably to the point of PM'ing a mod to ask if she'd spill the beans.

We shouldn't focus on trying to see behind their mask. That isn't why they asked a question or brought up a subject. If I posted something anonymously, it would really embarrass me to know that the mods were checking me out trying to discover my hidden identity. Give them the privacy they are clearly asking for.

I didn't want to say anything at the time, but since someone brought it up here, I know I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

Off the soapbox. Just wanted to say what I felt, that's all.
Was it the thread I posted a few posts back? I know there was talk on that one about knowing things and it went back and forth between some posters/mods.
  #59  
Old 05-06-2013, 10:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dave4him View Post
LOL... see if this was a board full of men this whole topic would have ended like twenty posts ago. :P
glad to see you Dave
  #60  
Old 05-06-2013, 11:01 PM
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I'm a mod. I saw it and I commented on that thread about it.

Honestly I don't even do much anymore as a mod now that Michael has changed the format for unregistered to post.

Before I used to maintain spam control, but now it does not exists.
I for one have never and would never even think about trying to play investigation to try and find out who's posting unregistered

I post unregistered at times because I want "some" privacy, so I feel that I should owe that same respect to others as well and leave them be

To my knowledge if any of the mods on here were abusing their mod privileges I know Michael would remove their status.
  #61  
Old 05-06-2013, 11:12 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycare View Post
I'm a mod. I saw it and I commented on that thread about it.

Honestly I don't even do much anymore as a mod now that Michael has changed the format for unregistered to post.

Before I used to maintain spam control, but now it does not exists.
I for one have never and would never even think about trying to play investigation to try and find out who's posting unregistered

I post unregistered at times because I want "some" privacy, so I feel that I should owe that same respect to others as well and leave them be

To my knowledge if any of the mods on here were abusing their mod privileges I know Michael would remove their status.
  #62  
Old 05-06-2013, 11:17 PM
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If I was seeing Mods post on "anonymous" thread calling out the poster I can understand being upset, but I haven't seen that so I don't understand the tangent this thread has taken.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAngels View Post
I'm curious as to who all the moderators are, and exactly what member information they have access to?

It seems like there are quite a few moderators here.
I don't really see what the big deal is. Its not like we enter a SSN or bank account # to register. Anyone can see what you're doing when you click on someone's profile (It tells you what thread they are viewing, what thread they are posting, when they are modifying a post...) or can search your name and find all your posts.

(PS No snarky tone going on here ^ just adding my 2cents)

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAngels View Post
That is so not true . My DH participates on a couple of forums and those guys are worse than any group of women .
My DH just got into it on some Facebook forum with a few other guys over one thing that led to another and another... I swear it took like 45 minutes of back and forth before DH said I'm over this. Of course the next day he was back responding to some of the things posted after he was "done"

Quote:
Originally Posted by daycare View Post
I'm a mod. I saw it and I commented on that thread about it.

Honestly I don't even do much anymore as a mod now that Michael has changed the format for unregistered to post.

Before I used to maintain spam control, but now it does not exists.
I for one have never and would never even think about trying to play investigation to try and find out who's posting unregistered

I post unregistered at times because I want "some" privacy, so I feel that I should owe that same respect to others as well and leave them be

To my knowledge if any of the mods on here were abusing their mod privileges I know Michael would remove their status.
  #63  
Old 05-07-2013, 06:27 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyss View Post
I don't really see what the big deal is. Its not like we enter a SSN or bank account # to register. Anyone can see what you're doing when you click on someone's profile (It tells you what thread they are viewing, what thread they are posting, when they are modifying a post...) or can search your name and find all your posts.

(PS No snarky tone going on here ^ just adding my 2cents)
I really am just curious. I don't even remember what info I gave when I signed up, but given my private nature it probably wasn't my "real" info anyway .

There has been talk here at times that moderators "know" who's really posting and I'm just curious as to what that actually means.
  #64  
Old 05-07-2013, 07:23 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucy View Post
I completely believe you when you say you would never reveal someone's identity. The following is not necessarily directed at Blackcat, as I can't remember who the mod was that I'm about to talk about, and it doesn't matter. Actually, I couldn't even tell you offhand who the mods even are!

Ok, while I wouldn't use the words "rude" and "condescending", necessarily, it did strike me as a tad bit cringe-worthy on a past thread (sorry, cannot for the life of me remember the topic, but it was within the last couple weeks... I think?) when a mod went on and on (in MY opinion it was on and on... I'm sure the mod didn't feel like it was) about how, with research and some sleuthing, they can figure out who an anonymous poster is.

I was almost embarrassed for "Anonymous" by it all. Who cares??!!?? Congratulations that you have that power, but it really shined a bright light in Anonymous's face and, I bet, made the majority of readers very curious as to who she was. Probably to the point of PM'ing a mod to ask if she'd spill the beans.

We shouldn't focus on trying to see behind their mask. That isn't why they asked a question or brought up a subject. If I posted something anonymously, it would really embarrass me to know that the mods were checking me out trying to discover my hidden identity. Give them the privacy they are clearly asking for.

I didn't want to say anything at the time, but since someone brought it up here, I know I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

Off the soapbox. Just wanted to say what I felt, that's all.
Lucy~ That WAS me you are referring to. It was NOT posted in the context in which you are referring to though. I was NOT condescending, rude or going on and on.....
I replied IN RESPONSE to another poster who asked:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Greenplasticwateringcans View Post
I signed in just for funsies...that unreg you quoted was me...I do wonder though how it shows up to the mods...IP's wouldn't be really easy to match...neither would location...Tell us mods...how does it show for you?
My response back was this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
Well, it isn't like a flashing neon sign or anything but when a topic is posted by an unregistered user and the topic has the potential to be controversial or dramatic, we (mods) take clues and cues from the post.

We pay attention to words they normally misspell or use incorrectly, to speech patterns and tempo as well as tone.

Those are VERY identifiable details sometimes.

9 out of 10 times we (mods) simply suspect but if the suspicion is strong enough, we can do a little cross referencing and a little more cross referencing and after a little research and a little bit of guessing, it usually becomes obvious.
So just to clarify, that is the method in which I personally use to figure out who someone is. My point in that post was that there is no big flashing sign that just says "Hey! this unregistered poster is so and so". It's NOT as black and white as you think.

However, YOU better than anyone knows full well that a member of this board does not have to be a moderator to do the same thing and figure out who someone is.

I also want to point out that the only reason the moderator conversation happened in that thread is because someone posted a controversial topic that had the potential to be super dramatic (prescription drug use etc) and everyone thought it was a troll. You said you were almost embarrassed for the anonymous poster.....and I would have been too, had I believed the OP of that thread was for real and NOT a troll....kwim?

We all know how trolls operate on forums..... I think that being a moderator is fun sometimes but other times, it isn't so fun because we take a lot of flack from others that don't really understand everything we do to keep things running smooth behind on the board.

Every unregistered poster is NOT simply a member in disguise looking for privacy. A lot of times, they are simply trolls looking to stir up drama and as a moderator it is my job to intercept that so that we don't have a free for all.

I am sorry if you all feel that is unfair in some way but I can't change how public forums work/operate but I do know that all of them have moderators for similar purposes.

I hope that answers your questions.

I have always made a point of trying to be as helpful and as neutral as possible as a member and as a moderator of this board. I try to be accommodating, supportive, friendly and welcoming. I try to do what moderators are suppose to do WHILE trying to maintain a place on this board as a regular member as well.

That is why my title, doesn't say moderator under my user name. Originally, I wanted posters to know I was just like them and didn't want replies or responses to me to be different or weird just because I am a moderator. Sometimes that has a tendency to make people treat me different and not be open or forthright.

The other moderators are:
SilverSabre25
FormerTeacher
Daycare
Breezy


As far as respect to unregistered posters goes....I feel that I have always gone out of my way to be supportive of unregistered posters because most members here tend to go off on them as if they are all trolls. The only unregistered posters that are treated with immediate respect are those that say "I am a regular member but logged out for privacy". Otherwise, it seems "troll!" is immediately thrown out into the thread.

I also made some comments to the unregistered poster in the prescription drug thread within the thread because as an unregistered poster, I couldn't very well send them a PM since they are unregistered.... kwim?

Anyways.....I don't really know what else to say beside no one knows who anyone is other than their IP address, which isn't always accurate or identifiable and other than your user name.....there is NO other information about you (as a member here) that moderators have access to.

Moderators do NOT know your real name, your daycare name, address or anything similar to that. Depending on whether or not you clicked the box in your UserCP, your e-mail address and birth date MAY be available too but ONLY if YOU put the info out there.

I really hope this clear up any confusion that has been going on.

If anyone has any other questions, I would be happy to answer them, within this thread or in a PM if you don't feel comfortable asking publically.


(Lucy~ this entire post/reply was not directed at you....I just wanted to clarify some things you mentioned)
  #65  
Old 05-07-2013, 07:48 AM
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I, too, need to throw my 2 cents in as a moderator.

The purpose of my asking to become a moderator was to help weed out the spam that I was constantly seeing. Plus I thought it was cool that I could tell my friends etc.. "hey I am a moderator of a daycare forum!"

Now to be honest: when I became a moderator (I think 3-4 years ago I think) I have only TWICE now actually looked up who an unregistered person is. This thread was one of them. I honestly thought this was a pure troll "stirring up the pot". I honestly also don't believe most unregistered. Even if they do start out by saying "I am a member blah blah" Any "troll" can say that.

That being said: I do not respond to unregistered. As we on the forum say- I don't feed the troll. I only responded to this one because I wanted to tell everyone that I thought it was a person who wanted to get all of us riled up. Which apparently it has!
  #66  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:04 AM
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I thought mods knew the state/area we lived in though because of the IP address or something like that?

Even in that thread, a poster asked the mods not to ever give the information out on them so I think thats why members became concerned with what had been said by the mods.

Last edited by Country Kids; 05-07-2013 at 08:39 AM. Reason: Changed wording
  #67  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:07 AM
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Good Grief
  #68  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:11 AM
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Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I thought mods knew the state/area we lived in though because of the IP address or something like that?

Even in that thread, a poster asked the mods not to ever give the information out on them so I think that put members on high alert with what had been said by the mods.
Like I said I have only looked up an unregistered twice. Both times it smelled troll all the way.

Like BC said we can only identify you by your IP address-which isn't always reliable. Your IP address is shown and then matches to the user name.

For the record: I have never have and never will reveal an unregistered poster. I myself have posted several times. I may not respond to unregistered but I have posted by unregistered
  #69  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:14 AM
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Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I thought mods knew the state/area we lived in though because of the IP address or something like that?

Even in that thread, a poster asked the mods not to ever give the information out on them so I think that put members on high alert with what had been said by the mods.
High alert for what?? Do you have some deep dark secret that you are worried about? Some secret identity? Are you in the witness protection program? Just curious why it is such a big deal?

Your IP address doesn't accurately tell anyone anything. Depending on what site you use to check someone's IP address, it can be really close or r e a l l y f a r o f f .

The poster you are referring to was My3cents and what she said was

Quote:
Originally Posted by My3cents View Post
BlackCat and any other Mod- I know that you know my personal information but if you ever used that against me or made that public information. I would be done with these boards for good.
She also said:

Quote:
Originally Posted by My3cents View Post
Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure me out, I am queen of the run on sentence, and repeat of the same information. When I am in a hurry everything is just the way it comes out. I often type so fast that I skip a letter and then often times I am interrupted with this and that, so I start a response and don't finish it until later in the day. My kiddo's come first. I guess I am saying I don't know what the ruckus is about with mods saying they know who everyone is...... I am not the original poster. Anyway back to work for me.....ugh....
so I am confused as to what your point is Country Kids?

I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE OR YOUR ADDRESS OR YOUR BIRTHDAY OR ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT YOU HAVE TOLD PEOPLE OR POSTED ON THE FORUM YOURSELF.

Sheesh~ I don't think I can be any clearer.

Last edited by Blackcat31; 05-07-2013 at 08:16 AM.
  #70  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:43 AM
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Originally Posted by Lucy View Post
I completely believe you when you say you would never reveal someone's identity. The following is not necessarily directed at Blackcat, as I can't remember who the mod was that I'm about to talk about, and it doesn't matter. Actually, I couldn't even tell you offhand who the mods even are!

Ok, while I wouldn't use the words "rude" and "condescending", necessarily, it did strike me as a tad bit cringe-worthy on a past thread (sorry, cannot for the life of me remember the topic, but it was within the last couple weeks... I think?) when a mod went on and on (in MY opinion it was on and on... I'm sure the mod didn't feel like it was) about how, with research and some sleuthing, they can figure out who an anonymous poster is.

I was almost embarrassed for "Anonymous" by it all. Who cares??!!?? Congratulations that you have that power, but it really shined a bright light in Anonymous's face and, I bet, made the majority of readers very curious as to who she was. Probably to the point of PM'ing a mod to ask if she'd spill the beans.

We shouldn't focus on trying to see behind their mask. That isn't why they asked a question or brought up a subject. If I posted something anonymously, it would really embarrass me to know that the mods were checking me out trying to discover my hidden identity. Give them the privacy they are clearly asking for.

I didn't want to say anything at the time, but since someone brought it up here, I know I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

Off the soapbox. Just wanted to say what I felt, that's all.
  #71  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:46 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
Your IP address doesn't accurately tell anyone anything. Depending on what site you use to check someone's IP address, it can be really close or r e a l l y f a r o f f
Mine is often very far off I've noticed. It usually puts me in a totally different state! That said it's often the same one, but if I was that concerned I know how to change it and would do it.


I just think this is a waste of time, debating about the moderators that is. Complain/question now but then send out the PMs when "you" (in the general sense, not directed at anyone) want a thread locked or a title changed.

Plus it's our personal responsibly to monitor what information we post online when we register somewhere or post something. I'm sure most of us know way more about other users than what they entered when registering because its been posted in a public post on a public forum.
  #72  
Old 05-07-2013, 08:59 AM
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Originally Posted by Lyss View Post
Mine is often very far off I've noticed. It usually puts me in a totally different state!


I just think this is a waste of time, debating about the moderators that is. Complain/question now but then send out the PMs when "you" (in the general sense, not directed at anyone) want a thread locked or a title changed.

Plus it's our personal responsibly to monitor what information we post online when we register somewhere or post something. I'm sure most of us know way more about other users than what they entered when registering because its been posted in a public post on a public forum.
This^^

If anyone is worried about what personal info is "known" to others then be careful what YOU write. (general YOU)

Be careful of YOUR words and what YOU put out there.

Many members here have shared their web-sites, daycare names, links to news articles in their areas, stated their locations, identified members they know in real life, etc etc etc etc....

If ANYONE was really bored, all they would have to do is read the archives of this forum, read someone's past posts and they can see ALL sorts of stuff people have randomly posted about themselves.

I am NOT saying everyone posts personal stuff but some people do (and then act surprised when others know where/who they are)

If YOU want to remain 100% anonymous at ALL times, then get off the internet.

Personally I don't feel I ever post anything that would make me nervous that someone else "might" find out.
I never say anything about daycare families or kids that I haven't already said to a parent.

I post about my licensor and KNOW she visits this site sometimes because I told her about it. I don't post derogatory things about anyone. If I offend anyone, well I will apologize if it was unintentional and stand by it if I meant it.

Who I am as Blackcat is who I am in real life.

Last edited by Blackcat31; 05-07-2013 at 09:03 AM.
  #73  
Old 05-07-2013, 09:35 AM
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I have changed the wording from "High Alert" to "concerned" in my post. Sorry for the wrong wording.

My point: The posts saying mods know unregistered posters is where the concern came from for members to be concerned. In My3cents posts she started with addressing to the mods that she would be done if anything was given out-sounds like a concern. She then went on to say not hard to figure her out but to me the first part sound like a concern.

Bc and Silver had posted earlier in that particular thread that mods could tell who unregistered posters were and then the longer thread on it. Once again that probably caused some concern.

Several posters on this thread have put they didn't like how mods let unregisters know who they are-sounds like a concern. It must have been something they have seen possibly more then once to have that feeling but maybe it just took the one time.

Yes, we are on a public forum and nothing is a secret but if someone is posting unregistered why even say mods know who people are. Just let them post anon and go from there.

Sorry for not making my previous post clearer and I hope my point is clearer.
On to have a great and wonderful sunny day!
  #74  
Old 05-07-2013, 09:39 AM
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This is an annoying thread. It's annoying because the question of how to leave a group is just, well, unnecessary. Just don't come back. Go to your member info and delete it. Delete all your previous posts.
Secondly, if you feel the need to announce to the entire forum that you are leaving, why wouldn't you log in as yourself. What difference does it make to everyone that "unregistered" is leaving. No one knows who you are so no one can be prepared for not hearing from you anymore. A simpler thing would have been to privately message a moderator and tell them and ask them any questions you had.
Thirdly, as far as people knowing your personal information, that's all on each individual. This is the internet, everything you ever type, picture you post, anywhere is out there and accessible by anyone who may want to see it or have the knowledge on how to access it. I'm pretty sure the Moderators are trying to say that they just know who is posting as unregistered. As in that if I posted as unregistered they would know it was Daycaremum, that's it, not that they knew every little personal detail about me!!
People have to know that even in closed sites, people can copy and paste anything you've typed, take a screen shot, even take a photo of their computer screen!! What you type and post is out there, don't kid yourself that there are any truly "private" sites.
This whole thread is strange.
  #75  
Old 05-07-2013, 10:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I have changed the wording from "High Alert" to "concerned" in my post. Sorry for the wrong wording.

My point: The posts saying mods know unregistered posters is where the concern came from for members to be concerned. In My3cents posts she started with addressing to the mods that she would be done if anything was given out-sounds like a concern. She then went on to say not hard to figure her out but to me the first part sound like a concern.

Bc and Silver had posted earlier in that particular thread that mods could tell who unregistered posters were and then the longer thread on it. Once again that probably caused some concern.
Concern from who? You are the only one who has mentioned concern or being on high alert.

Again, My3cents was NOT concerned, worried or on high alert. She said so herself.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
Several posters on this thread have put they didn't like how mods let unregisters know who they are-sounds like a concern. It must have been something they have seen possibly more then once to have that feeling but maybe it just took the one time.
I already explained that several times. Please read my response to Lucy.

I can't PM someone who is unregistered so it had to be posted in the thread. You also cannot take that thread as one example of how unregistered posters are dealt with or managed because as I ALREADY said, the unregistered was a registered member trolling or looking for drama!

Would you have been happier had the member just been able to make a dramatic post and have everyone take the time to read, ask, answer and make a big deal out of a post that was just unnecessary drama??
I think most of us have better things to do than to spend our time discussing made up scenarios about doing drugs and being a sister wife.

There is a reason why those kinds of posts are dramatic and why the poster's of those threads are called trolls.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
Yes, we are on a public forum and nothing is a secret but if someone is posting unregistered why even say mods know who people are. Just let them post anon and go from there. .
Not every thread posted by unregistered posters has a moderator in it telling everyone "we know who you are!!" Just that one thread you keep bringing up.

Which was ONE thread! One that was also NOT your typical unregistered poster.

Also, AGAIN....I mentioned it within the thread that I knew how to tell who people are because the poster was unregistered and I cannot PM an unregistered poster!

....and just because I suspect someone is some one else I don't KNOW it for sure.....I DON'T have that kind of knowledge or "special powers" like Silver said.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
Sorry for not making my previous post clearer and I hope my point is clearer.
On to have a great and wonderful sunny day!
Also for someone who seems to hate drama, you keep bringing it up over and over again, even posting links in threads.....even though a majority, if not all of these issues were already addressed, discussed and answered if you would just read the previous posts.

I'd be happy to answer any questions YOU have but you keep rehashing what you think other people think.

If YOU have a question about something YOU feel or think, by all means ask and I will be happy to address your concerns, "high alerts" or simple curiosities.
  #76  
Old 05-07-2013, 10:06 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycaremum View Post
This is an annoying thread. It's annoying because the question of how to leave a group is just, well, unnecessary. Just don't come back. Go to your member info and delete it. Delete all your previous posts.
Secondly, if you feel the need to announce to the entire forum that you are leaving, why wouldn't you log in as yourself. What difference does it make to everyone that "unregistered" is leaving. No one knows who you are so no one can be prepared for not hearing from you anymore. A simpler thing would have been to privately message a moderator and tell them and ask them any questions you had.
Thirdly, as far as people knowing your personal information, that's all on each individual. This is the internet, everything you ever type, picture you post, anywhere is out there and accessible by anyone who may want to see it or have the knowledge on how to access it. I'm pretty sure the Moderators are trying to say that they just know who is posting as unregistered. As in that if I posted as unregistered they would know it was Daycaremum, that's it, not that they knew every little personal detail about me!!
People have to know that even in closed sites, people can copy and paste anything you've typed, take a screen shot, even take a photo of their computer screen!! What you type and post is out there, don't kid yourself that there are any truly "private" sites.
This whole thread is strange.
finally someone else who gets it.
  #77  
Old 05-07-2013, 10:52 AM
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I hereby nominate this thread........
"Most Ridiculous"
  #78  
Old 05-07-2013, 11:25 AM
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I think what some people are afraid of is what happened to Dave and some other poster quite awhile ago..
I remember an old thread called something like.."be careful what you say on here" something like that... and I guess someone got mad at her and found out where she lived and sent licensing to her daycare.

I don't know what it was all about but she said she didn't do anything wrong, she just said not to trust anyone.

This is why people post anonymous or registered.
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Old 05-07-2013, 11:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelle View Post
I think what some people are afraid of is what happened to Dave and some other poster quite awhile ago..
I remember an old thread called something like.."be careful what you say on here" something like that... and I guess someone got mad at her and found out where she lived and sent licensing to her daycare.

I don't know what it was all about but she said she didn't do anything wrong, she just said not to trust anyone.

This is why people post anonymous or registered.
That is WRONG then. If you think posting anything on a public forum even if posting as anonymous is really anonymous, then you are mistaken.

Once you post anything on the internet, the World Wide Web owns it and it can be traced, copied or linked back to you...just like daycaremum said.

Only YOU can be responsible for what info about yourself is out there. It has NOTHING to do with this forum, members (both known and unknown) or moderators.

Only YOU can control what YOU put out there.

What happened to Dave happened on Facebook and Facebook is nothing but social sharing and telling the world stuff (NOT all FB users are like this)

Also what happened to the other poster you are referring to is that she poste something about a family she cared for. Something she should NEVER have posted on a PUBLIC forum and the family she was posting about came across the post and turned her in. Again that had nothing to do with the moderators or members of this forum.

The only person responsible for that happening was the original poster. If she had anything to say about a family in care, she should have done so discretely and in a way that did not identify her or the family.
  #80  
Old 05-07-2013, 11:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugar Magnolia View Post
I hereby nominate this thread........
"Most Ridiculous"
  #81  
Old 05-07-2013, 11:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
That is WRONG then. If you think posting anything on a public forum even if posting as anonymous is really anonymous, then you are mistaken.

Once you post anything on the internet, the World Wide Web owns it and it can be traced, copied or linked back to you...just like daycaremum said.

Only YOU can be responsible for what info about yourself is out there. It has NOTHING to do with this forum, members (both known and unknown) or moderators.

Only YOU can control what YOU put out there.

What happened to Dave happened on Facebook and Facebook is nothing but social sharing and telling the world stuff (NOT all FB users are like this)

Also what happened to the other poster you are referring to is that she poste something about a family she cared for. Something she should NEVER have posted on a PUBLIC forum and the family she was posting about came across the post and turned her in. Again that had nothing to do with the moderators or members of this forum.

The only person responsible for that happening was the original poster. If she had anything to say about a family in care, she should have done so discretely and in a way that did not identify her or the family.
ok I didn't even know what happened in those cases, I was just using them as an example as to why people want to really be anonymous.
I know that if someone is going to hurt themselves or someone , then you have to report it.
  #82  
Old 05-07-2013, 12:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelle View Post
I was just using them as an example as to why people want to really be anonymous.
Oh, don't get me wrong, I completely understand WHY people want to be anonymous on the internet in general.

I just think that if they actually believe they are, then that is just silly.
  #83  
Old 05-07-2013, 01:12 PM
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I realize things got a bit muddled here, but I'd like to clarify that I wasn't suggesting that anyone's secret identity would be TOLD to anyone. Not in any way, shape, or form. My only thing was on that "other" thread where it kept getting drilled that "we have voodoo powers", "we know who you are", "yes, we can see IP numbers and figure out your identity" -- all with a winky winky behind it. And then a brief description how they can do some sleuthing and FIGURE OUT who you are. It just hit me as kind of "well, la dee da, who cares". It was just that it was repeated several times like bragging or something. It came off (to ME) like the Anonymous person would be embarrassed to discover that she tried to conceal her identity, but a select group of people were peering behind her mask. That's all. I'm not in any way suggesting something untoward happens here. I just don't think it needs to be TALKED about over and over. Actually, not at all IMO.

I'm a mod on another board, so I do know that we can see IP's. I just wouldn't say what (to ME) amounts to "Ha, ha!! I know who you are!!! Neener neener!!!"

Again, that's just how it came off TO ME. I wasn't trying to stir anything up in the least. And I'm also not in any way concerned about people knowing who I am. I've never posted anonymously, but even if I did, I don't care if a few people know who I am. Just don't keep saying you know who I am. It makes others curious, and starts a whole side drama (like this thread lol), and I would not doubt that some members would PM a mod and ask her to reveal the secret. It's just silly to me. That's all.

Now carry on. All is well.
  #84  
Old 05-07-2013, 01:46 PM
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hmmmm......WELL, I am not a moderator and 99% of the time, if a MEMBER is posting as unregistered, I can figure out who it is. People have certain ways of saying things or using the same typos or misspelling that give it away.

The previous thread that you are talking about, as well as the one about "sister wives"....well, I THINK I know who the actual members are that posted THEM. When I suspected who they were, I went back and searched some of their older posts, and SURE ENOUGH, there were very similiar posts about the same topics made by those members. These are not NEW members, and they posted anonymous to start drama....or as many would say, they were being TROLLS. Yeah, I know who you are

So, when the mods said in that most recent thread that they could identify the actual member.....perhaps they were doing it so those LONG TIME members would KNOW that they had been "found out" and would stop trying to create controversy on the forum.

For that, I say THANK YOU TO OUR FABULOUS MODS!!!! You do a great, and thankless job for no monetary compensation and I APPRECIATE YOUR EFFORT AND DEDICATION TO KEEPING THIS A DRAMA FREE FORUM AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE!!!!!!
  #85  
Old 05-07-2013, 03:25 PM
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I think that the current moderators do a great job but there was a time on this forum that a couple of the moderators were in my opinion abrasive and condescending and I'm glad that they aren't mods anymore. As I recall it was during this time that a member was signing on as herself and then signing on as unregistered and then creating drama. Michael and the mods were all over it which is great. Unfortunately though one of the moderators (who is still a current poster) mentioned in an open thread that she knew which state the cheater/ faker poster lived and created even more drama. She named the state to shame the poster/cheater/faker. All of that could have happened in PM in my opinion.

Thanks current mods for doing a great job.
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Old 05-07-2013, 06:32 PM
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Originally Posted by Live and Learn View Post
I think that the current moderators do a great job but there was a time on this forum that a couple of the moderators were in my opinion abrasive and condescending and I'm glad that they aren't mods anymore. As I recall it was during this time that a member was signing on as herself and then signing on as unregistered and then creating drama. Michael and the mods were all over it which is great. Unfortunately though one of the moderators (who is still a current poster) mentioned in an open thread that she knew which state the cheater/ faker poster lived and created even more drama. She named the state to shame the poster/cheater/faker. All of that could have happened in PM in my opinion.

Thanks current mods for doing a great job.
OT: I remember a former moderator from a LONG time ago who would cause drama with her snide little comments. Get upset. Then delete them herself. Michael took away her status as a moderator which is great I think. She is still here but hasn't posted in a long time.

P.S.

Thanks for all the nice comments!
  #87  
Old 05-07-2013, 07:44 PM
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I think I remember that too. But it's not the same moderator incident I'm thinking about. The person I'm think about posted as recently as yesterday. Maybe even today as I haven't read many threads today. My point being though that moderators can and have abused power even on this site but Michael has been on it. Thanks again.
  #88  
Old 05-07-2013, 10:05 PM
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Haha...nah, liveandlearn is talking about me. I used to be a mod.....and at one time some things got a little bit heated and I said some things I shouldn't have. The poster I said those things to asked me to remove them and I did.

Then I made a public apology and Asked to have my moderator priveleges removed.

I messed up AND THEN I owned it.

Glad you brought it up liveandlearn.......cuz that's what I did. I Lived and I Learned!!!!
  #89  
Old 05-07-2013, 10:38 PM
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FUNNY! I dont remember that.

I was remembering something and SOMEONE else. I wasn't wanting to dredge anything up. I was pointing out that moderators are human and that in the past moderators have outed people's state of residence on the open forum. (I wish I could remember that old thread name.) You probably remember it. As I remember it the poster/faker/cheater was posting under a couple of different names and as unregistered. Under one persona she lived in xyz state and under the other persona she lived in abc. She was stirring up craziness and voicing different contradicting opinions. Too strange. Then the mod called her out on it and said something like "hey miss poster/faker/cheater I see you live in abc state and blah blah blah."

My OT point being that the faker/cheater was WRONG! But the mod was too for outing the faker/cheater's user's state of residence.
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Old 05-07-2013, 11:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Live and Learn View Post
FUNNY! I dont remember that.

I was remembering something and SOMEONE else. I wasn't wanting to dredge anything up. I was pointing out that moderators are human and that in the past moderators have outed people's state of residence on the open forum. (I wish I could remember that old thread name.) You probably remember it. As I remember it the poster/faker/cheater was posting under a couple of different names and as unregistered. Under one persona she lived in xyz state and under the other persona she lived in abc. She was stirring up craziness and voicing different contradicting opinions. Too strange. Then the mod called her out on it and said something like "hey miss poster/faker/cheater I see you live in abc state and blah blah blah."

My OT point being that the faker/cheater was WRONG! But the mod was too for outing the faker/cheater's user's state of residence.
FUNNY! I don't remember that

Can you post a link to that? I must have missed it.
  #91  
Old 05-08-2013, 12:04 AM
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I'm not sure whether I will close this thread or not. While it was interesting to read I am really not sure how this is helping those looking for childcare related issues. The only thing this thread offers is paranoia .

There are only a few Mods (maybe 4) and I think only BlackCat really handles the forum everyday and understands it probably better then anyone. She makes my job here a lot easier. Mods are helpful if someone finds a troll or something that should not be written (like an unregistered poster writing the address and name of a provider he or she wants to slander). All the mods and Admin get the report and can remove it ASAP. I had someone threaten to sue me the other day because someone wrote something about their product and they felt the post was slandering them. I removed it.

I am the owner of Daycare.com and the forum Admin. I can do just about anything to this forum. I CAN NOT read Private Messages. Also, your IP only shows as city state. Your IP does NOT reveal your address. Also, your IP constantly changes so most likely your new IP does not even relate to the one you signed up with. What you put publically on this forum is the only thing available to us.

I've written as unregistered several times and I still did not have a problem with anyone finding out it was me. I have a guy mentality and its pretty easy to figure out my conversational tone whether logged in or not.

I've decided to close the thread. If anyone want it reopened, PM me.
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Michael Castello
http://www.ccin.com/about.html
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