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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>When to Terminate a Child in Your Daycare
lilmonkeys 09:20 AM 04-12-2016
hello fellow providers...I need some input, advice etc.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had beenn in time out 2 times, but redirecred over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doibg it he told thr other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will loose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a sting sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the othwrs. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had beenn in time out 2 times, but redirecred over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doibg it he told thr other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will loose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a sting sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the othwrs. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
lilmonkeys 09:30 AM 04-12-2016
hello fellow providers...I need some input, advice etc.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had been in time out 2 times, but redirected over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doing it he told the other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will lose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a string sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the others. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had been in time out 2 times, but redirected over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doing it he told the other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will lose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a string sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the others. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
JackandJill 09:43 AM 04-12-2016
For me the biggest indicator is when you can see the difference in days the child is there or not there. As you said, the day he isn't there are so nice. That would be the sign for me that it is time to move them along!
Blackcat31 09:49 AM 04-12-2016
Originally Posted by lilmonkeys:
hello fellow providers...I need some input, advice etc.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had been in time out 2 times, but redirected over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doing it he told the other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will lose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a string sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the others. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
You can love the parents all you want but I value my sanity more. hello fellow providers...I need some input, advice etc.
I have a little boy that is 4.5 years . when he started here he was such a good little boy. well mannered etc. then about the past 6 or 7 weeks he had completely changed. he never ever ever follows directions, he is always doing the opposite of what I tell him to do or not to do. for example, just today he gets here at 630 am, by 830 he had been in time out 2 times, but redirected over 5 times. the time outs were for throwing a toy at my window, then the 2nd was for drinking his apple juice and as he was doing it he told the other kids he was drinking his beer. he comes 4 days a week for up to 10 hours a day.
when we are outside he climbs on top of tables and throws things and screams and runs around all crazy runs into other kids etc.
any suggestions. I talk to the parents literally weekly about this and they say they will talk with him and he will lose things at home, but then it starts all over the next day.
I was trying to figure out if someone else was apart of the attitude be has here. but he isn't here Mondays and noticed my daycare is quiet and calm and everyone behaves and is never in time out. then the rest of the week is chaos bc of him.
one time I put him in time out on my couch and there was a string sticking out on a seam of the couch and he decided to pull on it and ripped a huge hole in my couch. just very destructive, doesn't listen or follow any directions ever. I go over the rules and expectations every morning with him and the others. he is the only one I have to keep reminding all day and redirecting...any suggestions.
I love the parents but just don't know if it's a good decision to keep or term.
Honestly it simply sounds like he needs a much different environment. I'd let him go.
The parents solution(s) don't seem to be helping (at least not consistently) and I would just not have the patience to continue repeating myself over and over without seeing any positive and consistent changes.
I think Monday's are trying to tell you something.
childcaremom 09:53 AM 04-12-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
You can love the parents all you want but I value my sanity more.
Honestly it simply sounds like he needs a much different environment. I'd let him go.
The parents solution(s) don't seem to be helping (at least not consistently) and I would just not have the patience to continue repeating myself over and over without seeing any positive and consistent changes.
I think Monday's are trying to tell you something.
You can love the parents all you want but I value my sanity more.
Honestly it simply sounds like he needs a much different environment. I'd let him go.
The parents solution(s) don't seem to be helping (at least not consistently) and I would just not have the patience to continue repeating myself over and over without seeing any positive and consistent changes.
I think Monday's are trying to tell you something.
I agree. I also find that if I start questioning if it's time to term.... it usually is.
NightOwl 09:12 AM 04-13-2016
The string on the couch, meh. It was a string, he saw it, wanted to pull it. He probably didn't intend to make a hole.
The other behaviors would have me drafting a term letter. I always feel for kids like this because I'm afraid they'll end up labeled and shuffled around to different providers, which is counterproductive.
But that's not really your problem. Your problem is the chaos he brings on a daily basis. If he's this disruptive to your program, if he dominates your attention with his misbehavior, then it's time to go. It's not fair to the others.
The other behaviors would have me drafting a term letter. I always feel for kids like this because I'm afraid they'll end up labeled and shuffled around to different providers, which is counterproductive.
But that's not really your problem. Your problem is the chaos he brings on a daily basis. If he's this disruptive to your program, if he dominates your attention with his misbehavior, then it's time to go. It's not fair to the others.
daycarediva 09:29 AM 04-13-2016
I would just let him go. You have addressed the behaviors with parents. You SEE the positive result that consistency, rules and routine have on him, and you KNOW that is being undone on the weekend.
I would just simply say it's no longer a good fit, and that you think he would do better in a situation with more than one provider due to the level of supervision he requires.
I would just simply say it's no longer a good fit, and that you think he would do better in a situation with more than one provider due to the level of supervision he requires.
CityGarden 10:26 AM 04-13-2016
I agree with NightOwl about the string on the couch --- I am sure he did not intend to cause a hole.
Personally in the short time I have been on this forum it seems people are quick to suggest terminating a family. If he was new to your care I could relate to this but he is not and until 2 months ago you describe him in a completely different way. He is in your care 40 hours a week so you are also responsible just as the parents are and should at least try to partner on how to improve him behavior.
I am a HUGE advocate for children getting the sleep and nutrition their bodies need. Children that age should be sleeping 10-12 hours a day. Can the parents help commit to that? Also limiting media helps a ton with children's behaviors.....
Personally in the short time I have been on this forum it seems people are quick to suggest terminating a family. If he was new to your care I could relate to this but he is not and until 2 months ago you describe him in a completely different way. He is in your care 40 hours a week so you are also responsible just as the parents are and should at least try to partner on how to improve him behavior.
I would have a formal parent teacher conference after hours outlining the challenges, your upcoming plans and approach to adjusting the behaviors while he is in your care and also clearing indicating what you feel they can and should do at home to support this.
1. Have you mentioned his behavior in a formal manner to the parents or just at pick up/drop off?
2. Have you documented his behavior for a typical day or two and showed it to the parents while also contrasting it to his former good behavior?
I am a HUGE advocate for children getting the sleep and nutrition their bodies need. Children that age should be sleeping 10-12 hours a day. Can the parents help commit to that? Also limiting media helps a ton with children's behaviors.....
I would tell the parents you are willing to work with him in your program but that his behavior has to improve with in the next X weeks or this program will no longer fit his needs as his behaviors are impacting the entire group. (In essence he would be on a probation period without using that term to the parents)
1. Can the parents commit to him getting the sleep he needs (this includes nap times hours)?
2. Are the making sure he naps on days he is not in your care? Can they limit his media to X number of hours on the weekend so Mondays are not so tough?
3. Does he follow a consistent schedule / routine at home?
4. Is he eating healthy foods?
Tay 10:35 AM 04-13-2016
He should be in school already....time to go!
Blackcat31 11:16 AM 04-13-2016
Originally Posted by CityGarden:
I agree with NightOwl about the string on the couch --- I am sure he did not intend to cause a hole.
Personally in the short time I have been on this forum it seems people are quick to suggest terminating a family. If he was new to your care I could relate to this but he is not and until 2 months ago you describe him in a completely different way. He is in your care 40 hours a week so you are also responsible just as the parents are and should at least try to partner on how to improve him behavior. Have you mentioned his behavior in a formal manner to the parents or just at pick up/drop off? Have you documented his behavior for a typical day or two and showed it to mom while also contrasting it to his former good behavior. I would have a formal parent teacher conference after hours outlining the challenges, your upcoming plans and approach to adjusting the behaviors while he is in your care and also clearing indicating what you feel they can and should do.
I am a HUGE advocate for children getting the sleep and nutrition their bodies need. Children that age should be sleeping 10-12 hours a day. Can the parents help commit to that? Also limiting media helps a ton with children's behaviors..... can they limit his media to X number of hours on the weekend so Mondays are not so tough. I would tell the parents you are willing to work with him in your program but that he is on probation for the next X weeks as his behaviors are impacting the entire group.
I'm sorry but I totally disagree with this. I agree with NightOwl about the string on the couch --- I am sure he did not intend to cause a hole.
Personally in the short time I have been on this forum it seems people are quick to suggest terminating a family. If he was new to your care I could relate to this but he is not and until 2 months ago you describe him in a completely different way. He is in your care 40 hours a week so you are also responsible just as the parents are and should at least try to partner on how to improve him behavior. Have you mentioned his behavior in a formal manner to the parents or just at pick up/drop off? Have you documented his behavior for a typical day or two and showed it to mom while also contrasting it to his former good behavior. I would have a formal parent teacher conference after hours outlining the challenges, your upcoming plans and approach to adjusting the behaviors while he is in your care and also clearing indicating what you feel they can and should do.
I am a HUGE advocate for children getting the sleep and nutrition their bodies need. Children that age should be sleeping 10-12 hours a day. Can the parents help commit to that? Also limiting media helps a ton with children's behaviors..... can they limit his media to X number of hours on the weekend so Mondays are not so tough. I would tell the parents you are willing to work with him in your program but that he is on probation for the next X weeks as his behaviors are impacting the entire group.
The OP is NOT just as responsible as the parents and she HAS tried (numerous times) to get the parents on board with no luck.
When people (general people) start telling daycare providers (NOT teachers in a classroom with tons of support) but in-home child care providers that it's more or less their jobs to "fix" these kids, that is when bad stuff starts happening.
IME on this board and tons of others...when a provider gets to the point of venting/complaining or left without any idea how to manage a situation it's because they've already exhausted EVERY.SINGLE trick in their basket of tricks.
I apologize, as I am sure my post comes across as a bit harsh but nothing bothers me more than someone (anyone) making a provider think negative behaviors are their issues to "fix".
I'll manage any type of behavior in my care IF and ONLY IF the parents not only take the lead but are working HARDER than I am to make changes.
renodeb 11:23 AM 04-13-2016
I had a little boy years ago, he was great for a really long time then suddenly out of know where he started to act up, throwing toys over my fence (on purpose), hitting my dog, throwing rocks at the dog, among other things. I asked the parents if there had been any big changes at home to cause him to act this way and of course they played dumb. I finally termed them and it was so much better. He effected the mood of the hole group.
I think you answered your own question.
Deb
I think you answered your own question.
Deb
CityGarden 11:25 AM 04-13-2016
Black Cat I actually tried to edit the post to clarify my view and sent a note to the moderator to help me in doing so.
I do not feel the provider is just as responsible but I do feel she does and should play a role in it. I am hoping the moderator allows my revised post to be posted but we will see. Sorry if I offended the OP that was not my intent.
I do not feel the provider is just as responsible but I do feel she does and should play a role in it. I am hoping the moderator allows my revised post to be posted but we will see. Sorry if I offended the OP that was not my intent.
Blackcat31 11:30 AM 04-13-2016
Originally Posted by CityGarden:
Black Cat I actually tried to edit the post to clarify my view and sent a note to the moderator to help me in doing so.
I do not feel the provider is just as responsible but I do feel she does and should play a role in it. I am hoping the moderator allows my revised post to be posted but we will see. Sorry if I offended the OP that was not my intent.
Black Cat I actually tried to edit the post to clarify my view and sent a note to the moderator to help me in doing so.
I do not feel the provider is just as responsible but I do feel she does and should play a role in it. I am hoping the moderator allows my revised post to be posted but we will see. Sorry if I offended the OP that was not my intent.
Again I apologize if my reply seemed harsh... Ive just seen way too many providers try so much longer than they really should have and then are still left feeling like failures.
It creates a vicious cycle.
If parents do their jobs we can usually easily do ours but we can't do much of anything without support from home base.
lovemydaycare0912 11:52 AM 04-13-2016
If you have tried all you can, terming is not failure. Take it from me, I kept a family way longer than I should have. Everytime I added a new policy it would give me anxiety to speak to the parents because they always had a problem with everything. They would be late here and there and of course my fault even if I gave them a late fee. Dcb was amazing but I could not tolerate his parents. After a big second blow up, I let them go. I have been feeling so much better ever since. If you have to term because it is what is best for you, DO NOT feel bad. You come first!
CityGarden 12:59 PM 04-13-2016
Yeah! They allowed my revised post. OP please read it.
The reason I wanted to revise it was to be with a spirit of support to you and in a hope of being solution oriented. I do hope you were not offended / slighted by my first draft at it..... I was rushing and quickly noticed it read in a way I did not intend it to. Sorry.
Thanks Michael for allowing the change!!!
The reason I wanted to revise it was to be with a spirit of support to you and in a hope of being solution oriented. I do hope you were not offended / slighted by my first draft at it..... I was rushing and quickly noticed it read in a way I did not intend it to. Sorry.
Thanks Michael for allowing the change!!!
NightOwl 01:37 PM 04-13-2016
I agree citygarden, that our environments can have an equally positive or negative effect on children's behavior just as their home environments do. We do have a certain responsibility in helping to alter negative behaviors, but it is ultimately on the parents.
If nothing works to improve it, then the parents likely aren't backing you up at home. When I terminate for behavior (which is rare) , it's more because the parents aren't on board to fix it, and less about the behavior itself.
If nothing works to improve it, then the parents likely aren't backing you up at home. When I terminate for behavior (which is rare) , it's more because the parents aren't on board to fix it, and less about the behavior itself.
CityGarden 10:35 PM 04-13-2016
Look at this quote I found on an old thread....
Originally Posted by LovetheSun:
Any help would be appreciated! One family is not making much effort to work on their child behavior with us, so I am printing and passing it to each parents...in hope it helps
It is too harsh?
"If your child is misbehaving on a regular basis, you will be notified and it is our expectation that the parent will be working alongside the daycare providers to adjust the child’s behavior. If the behaviors continues and gets worse then we have the right to terminate the contract if we feel that other children are being badly affected by the behavior.
You will receive a written notice for each behavior we must work on. For example if your child has been aggressive toward other children, it is expected that you speak to your child about her/his behavior and encourage her/his to be kind to others.
Please always feel free to speak to me regarding your child behavior, and do not hesitate to ask me if you need any advices or recommendations on what to do."
Don't hesitate to let me know if you don't believe is properly formulated!
Any help would be appreciated! One family is not making much effort to work on their child behavior with us, so I am printing and passing it to each parents...in hope it helps
It is too harsh?
"If your child is misbehaving on a regular basis, you will be notified and it is our expectation that the parent will be working alongside the daycare providers to adjust the child’s behavior. If the behaviors continues and gets worse then we have the right to terminate the contract if we feel that other children are being badly affected by the behavior.
You will receive a written notice for each behavior we must work on. For example if your child has been aggressive toward other children, it is expected that you speak to your child about her/his behavior and encourage her/his to be kind to others.
Please always feel free to speak to me regarding your child behavior, and do not hesitate to ask me if you need any advices or recommendations on what to do."
Don't hesitate to let me know if you don't believe is properly formulated!
daycarediva 03:42 AM 04-14-2016
Originally Posted by NightOwl:
I agree citygarden, that our environments can have an equally positive or negative effect on children's behavior just as their home environments do. We do have a certain responsibility in helping to alter negative behaviors, but it is ultimately on the parents.
If nothing works to improve it, then the parents likely aren't backing you up at home. When I terminate for behavior (which is rare) , it's more because the parents aren't on board to fix it, and less about the behavior itself.
I agree with this- and again, your environment may not be the best fit for him. Does he need a lot more supervision? (eg. more than one adult in the room) activity level? (I have had kids not able to keep up with our physical, fast paced day) looser rules (or rules closer to home)? I agree citygarden, that our environments can have an equally positive or negative effect on children's behavior just as their home environments do. We do have a certain responsibility in helping to alter negative behaviors, but it is ultimately on the parents.
If nothing works to improve it, then the parents likely aren't backing you up at home. When I terminate for behavior (which is rare) , it's more because the parents aren't on board to fix it, and less about the behavior itself.
again, termination is NOT a failure, it's saying "This isn't what's best for child/provider/other children"
Unregistered 04:18 PM 04-14-2016
I would keep him, because I'm assuming in September he will be in some type of school. That's four months away. It just seems a bit cruel to term him with so little to go.
Ariana 05:45 PM 04-14-2016
99.9% of all behaviors are nipped in the bud when kids are in my care. The only behavior I cannot deal with is attachment issues where the child cries all day. Other than that, I don't have kids who are crazy and out of control. They know I mean business. When I get angry I pretty much turn into Samual L. Jackson and his crazy mean stare 
I never work with parents when it comes to this stuff because parents will not help you. They don't care which is why this behavior even exists to begin with. Are you telling me that a kid from a family who cares is going to be acting like this? No way! I would be mortified (as would we all on this forum I am sure) if my daycare provider told me these things. I would be seeking out her advice on how to fix the issue...is that what these parents do? Nope!
I never work with parents when it comes to this stuff because parents will not help you. They don't care which is why this behavior even exists to begin with. Are you telling me that a kid from a family who cares is going to be acting like this? No way! I would be mortified (as would we all on this forum I am sure) if my daycare provider told me these things. I would be seeking out her advice on how to fix the issue...is that what these parents do? Nope!
Essentialrose1 03:51 PM 04-20-2016
I agree that you shouldn't feel guilty or that you're responsible for his behavior. Children with challenging behaviors NEED the caregivers AND parents to be on the same page with promoting positive behaviors & reinforcements. Doesn't sound like you're getting that. Sorry. You've done what you can. I'm struggling with this also & it seriously makes the teacher:ratio so difficult.
Play Care 03:17 AM 04-21-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I would keep him, because I'm assuming in September he will be in some type of school. That's four months away. It just seems a bit cruel to term him with so little to go.
To keep a child who is not thriving in the environment is cruel. It says "I value money over the well being of the child." I would keep him, because I'm assuming in September he will be in some type of school. That's four months away. It just seems a bit cruel to term him with so little to go.
Sometimes being the "Boss" means making the tough decisions.
EntropyControlSpecialist 05:36 AM 04-21-2016
Originally Posted by Play Care:
To keep a child who is not thriving in the environment is cruel. It says "I value money over the well being of the child."
Sometimes being the "Boss" means making the tough decisions.
That's a great viewpoint. To keep a child who is not thriving in the environment is cruel. It says "I value money over the well being of the child."
Sometimes being the "Boss" means making the tough decisions.
Unregistered 09:11 AM 04-21-2016
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
That's a great viewpoint.
he just barely turned 4 in march. he can't start kinder until he is 5. so I would have him for a whole year longer. That's a great viewpoint.
I'm leaning towards termini him now. just based on another week and constantly doing what I tell him not to do. and misbehaving all the time. I go over the rules at the beginning of each day. right after I go over the rules I ask him what they are and he just mumbles random things. which is more of a sign he just isn't listening.
EntropyControlSpecialist 11:21 AM 04-21-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
he just barely turned 4 in march. he can't start kinder until he is 5. so I would have him for a whole year longer.
I'm leaning towards termini him now. just based on another week and constantly doing what I tell him not to do. and misbehaving all the time. I go over the rules at the beginning of each day. right after I go over the rules I ask him what they are and he just mumbles random things. which is more of a sign he just isn't listening.
Sometimes, I have a problem with trying to work on things far past the point that I should have. Other times, I seem to value my sanity more and actually terminate quickly. he just barely turned 4 in march. he can't start kinder until he is 5. so I would have him for a whole year longer.
I'm leaning towards termini him now. just based on another week and constantly doing what I tell him not to do. and misbehaving all the time. I go over the rules at the beginning of each day. right after I go over the rules I ask him what they are and he just mumbles random things. which is more of a sign he just isn't listening.
Don't be like me. Value your sanity more and terminate quickly if you feel like you aren't getting anywhere and if the parents aren't greatly helping to eliminate the negative behaviors. BlackCat has said that she won't keep a child if the parents are working as hard as or harder than she is to eliminate negative behaviors and that has stuck in my mind since.