Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Parents and Guardians Forum>Would it Seem Weird.....
Unregistered 02:23 PM 06-14-2010
I have some concerns about my daughter's day care. But I am not sure if its just b/c I'm seeing a snapshot of the day or if this is how things always are. I am finally out on summer break and would like to observe part of her day at daycare to see how things are. I am wondering if this would seem weird to the provider though considering my daughter has already been in her care for 3 months? I just don't know how else to find out if my concerns are valid or not that big of a deal.
Reply
melissa ann 03:55 PM 06-14-2010
How old is your daughter and what concerns do you have? I have an open door policy where parents may come in at any time to visit their children. I have never had that happen though. I think it would be disruptive for everyone if a parent stayed for a few hours. About a yr ago, mom to dcg in my care said her dad would pick girl up on a certain day. Mom & dad are not together and live about 40 mins away from eac other. Well, he came in the afternoon, I had dcg up from her nap for him to take her. Well, the other kids woke up and then somehow we ended up in the yard, oh, dad also brought his g-friend and he stayed for like 2 hours and left w/o girl. Our "normal" plans for the afternoon went right out the window. I don't know how I would feel if parent(s) wanted to stay and watch what we did throughout the day. I would feel offended that parent(s) didn't trust me with their child. Maybe you should find another provider if you are having some concerns with your provider.
You say you are on summer break, where is your daughter during the day?
Reply
jen 04:10 PM 06-14-2010
If you do stop by and observe, you should be prepared to take your child with you when you leave. Also, I'm not sure how accurate a picture you will get from your observation...kids act completely different when they have a new adult in the picture.

What are your concerns? Although, I guess the bigger questions is why don't you feel comfortable simply discussing them with your provider?
Reply
Unregistered 04:50 PM 06-14-2010
My daughter will be 6 months. I just started my summer break so my daughter is now with me. I am still taking her to daycare one or two days a week to keep her familiar with daycare and to keep my spot. I'd like to observe for several reasons but mainly b/c I have concerns the children aren't be supervised at all times (info gotten from a state inspection) and never seem to be engaged in any type of play. They are always wandering around to music. I know most of the kids there are 1-2 years old and this could obviously be music time but no matter what time of day I go, they are doing the same thing. I have tried talking to the provider and see if she does activities, etc and I never really get any answers.
Reply
Unregistered 07:41 PM 06-14-2010
Send in some wipes for her face so that maybe she will get the hint.
:-)
Reply
melissa ann 06:15 AM 06-15-2010
When we are inside, I play lots of childrens' cds. The kids love to sing/dance. It's also playing when they have free playtime. I also have a Celine Dion lullaby cd that I put on at nap time.
I agree with Jen, if you do go, prepare to take your daughter with you when you leave. If you are having concerns talk with her. Does she a play room for the kids, or toys out?
Since you are off for summer, maybe you should just find another provider.
Reply
jen 06:20 AM 06-15-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My daughter will be 6 months. I just started my summer break so my daughter is now with me. I am still taking her to daycare one or two days a week to keep her familiar with daycare and to keep my spot. I'd like to observe for several reasons but mainly b/c I have concerns the children aren't be supervised at all times (info gotten from a state inspection) and never seem to be engaged in any type of play. They are always wandering around to music. I know most of the kids there are 1-2 years old and this could obviously be music time but no matter what time of day I go, they are doing the same thing. I have tried talking to the provider and see if she does activities, etc and I never really get any answers.
Hmmm...to be honest, they are pretty young to be engaged in any type of group activity. Kids this age tend to play next to one another as opposed to with one another. Kids aren't really ready for "preschool" until they are at the back end of 2. A six month old is really just exploring as opposed to playing. What kinds of activities are you looking for?
Reply
mac60 06:28 AM 06-15-2010
This is exactly why I have my dc area in the back of my house in the family room. Drop offs and pick ups are at the front door, 2 rooms away from the dc space.

As far as music, I always have the radio on, or a kids cd in, etc. And many a day you will find the kids playing their own version of musical chairs.
Reply
Aya477 06:50 AM 06-15-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My daughter will be 6 months. I just started my summer break so my daughter is now with me. I am still taking her to daycare one or two days a week to keep her familiar with daycare and to keep my spot. I'd like to observe for several reasons but mainly b/c I have concerns the children aren't be supervised at all times (info gotten from a state inspection) and never seem to be engaged in any type of play. They are always wandering around to music. I know most of the kids there are 1-2 years old and this could obviously be music time but no matter what time of day I go, they are doing the same thing. I have tried talking to the provider and see if she does activities, etc and I never really get any answers.
Chances are that if you are seeing the same activity every day regardless of the time you pick your child up that there is probably little structure or activity going on....atleast that would be my hunch.

In my state (NC) you can request 3 years history on any licensed dc so you may need to check with your state's licensing entity to request such. Thru the history you can read the details of the write ups, licensing inspections, etc. I have heavily involved myself in researching the centers I have placed my child in by reading up on the visits, inspections, etc; even for the centers I was merely interested in. Licensing is a bit screwed up for lack of a better phrase. The consultants/inspectors can be nit picky about the most meaningless items yet due to a technicality not be able to issue a write up for something of magnitude. For example--my son's previous dc had cameras installed in the classrooms. Once he transitioned to his 3yo room, I noticed that the teachers did not interact with the children, weren't adhering to the "educational" time allotted, stood around engaging in conversation with eachother, sat on their big behinds at the tables doing nothing, and very frequently would stand out in the hallway NOT SUPERVISING the classroom of 21 kids. What did state licensing do with the printouts (proof) I provided of these offenses occurring?? Licensing interviewed the teachers and because the teachers had various reasons for why they were doing nothing or out in the hallway, the dc got off on a technicality. But, in his 2yo room, a teacher was written up for not supervising a child in the following scenario: teacher getting children to sit at table to prepare for snack. While teacher served snack, a child walked off to the bathroom and the teacher did not see the child go into the bathroom for 1-2 minutes. I don't know about other moms but I don't always see my one child go to the bathroom while we are at home so I don't necessarily think that is a severe offense. Point to all this blabbing is: if you have a concern, you need to investigate it otherwise you will be filled with constant internal inquiry while your child is in care. If you feel that your concern was brought on because of a licensing inspection, then look into the details of the write up and determine if you think the incident was unacceptable by your standards. Just from personal experience with our last DC, making an inquiry with the provider only compounded my child's problems while in care so I cannot imagine what a provider would think if you requested to observe (even with an open door policy). And also, do not forget that everyone is always on their best behavior when they are being watched.
Reply
Liliya 06:52 AM 06-15-2010
When someone knocks on my door all kids run to see who is here,so, from the parent of view it probably looks like they just wondering around.
What do you want a 6 month old do?
Even at 1 most of the time they just play.
Reply
mismatchedsocks 09:01 AM 06-15-2010
I can understand your concerns, however from a provider aspect, when I know its pick up time, I usually have them doing something that does not involve me, or me having to be right there for it to continue since I will be handling the pick up or dropped off kid. I have music on all day, and sometimes during drop off/pick ups, the kids are more interested in that then anything else.

I would ask her what goes on during the day, make her answer you. If she gives a vague "oh they play" answer then you may want to find another provider.

Also touching with the state inspection. If you read my "dings" from my inspections you may think I am not watching the kids or my house is a pigsty. I got a ding for "hazardous material in reach of children" and it was for the hand soap I used not saying "kid safe". Minimal to me, since of course the kids arent drinking soap, but can you imagine reading hazardous material in daycare"!?!?!
Its hard to see from that wording what it is. I would first call the licenser, she can give you detailed direction to what it was for.
Reply
Janet 09:07 PM 06-15-2010
On paper, violations look much worse than they really are. I have gotten dinged a few times for dumb stuff, but to a perspective parent, that can look really bad! Also, at your child's age, how much group activity are you expecting? I include my infants in circle time and reading time, but not always in art. I take my infant outside but I don't let them crawl around and eat dirt, etc. You could ask if you can sit in for a while during the day so that you can see for yourself how she runs things, but out of courtesy for the other families, you need to make yourself as invisible as you can so that you don't muck up your providers daily plan.
Reply
Crystal 03:06 PM 06-16-2010
First, let me say, as a provider I would not be offended or upset at all if a parent requested to observe....honestly, I think they should at some point anyway....not to check up on me, per say, but to observe how their child interacts within the environment and with other children.

Second, keep in mind that you legally have the right to drop in unnanounced at any time f your child is there. If you end up not getting to observe, I would drop in several times, at various times of day, just to see. If your provider takes issue with this, I would question why....but do be respectful and considerate of the times of day....for instance, don't disrupt naptime.

Your child is very young, so you will not see much in regards to activity times, etc. But if there are older children, even as young as 2 years old, there should be some semblence of structure and organization to the day. Re. the music, I play lots of music, but it should not be continous or all day....that would be stressful, nervewracking and meaningless to all.
Reply
Janet 09:00 PM 06-16-2010
While I have the open door policy, I also have no problem letting parents know that naptime visits are really a nightmare for everyone. Just because it's the time that they would like to visit and observe doesn't make it the best time to do it. How are kids supposed to sleep with a parent there, wanting to observe. I'm all for parents coming to observe, but it's best to do it when there is actually something going on to observe! For instance, why come at naptime when everyone is sleeping when you can come in the morning and be a part of circle time, art time and outdoor/large motor play? It's just plain old stupid to come during naptime! Also, it's pretty disrespectful. I think that coming during naptime says "I don't care about what's best for anyone else, this is the best time for me because it's during my lunch break, etc..." And it really does muck up the day for kids who either can't fall asleep or get woken up by the visit. Also, during the school year, I take walks to and from the bus stop and a drop in visit to observe would be highly inappropriate it it interferes with the times that I need to go to the bus stop, but if a parent insists, then they will need to wait in their car in my driveway until I return. I can't drop everything if I need to go to the bus stop just because they want to observe. I have responsibilities to other families. Most importantly, if a parent wants to drop in to observe, then the parent needs to be prepared to take their child with them when they leave. It's not fair to the child to have a parent stop in, stay a while and then leave without them. Talk about stressing a kid out!!! As far as the "why's" for wanting to observe me with their child, that's none of my business. I don't ask because I don't need to know. All I need to know is that I provide the same level of care no matter who is there, so I have nothing to hide and nothing to prove. I'm a full disclosure type of girl, I tell the parents whenever anything happens, even if it's something as simple as the food program lady coming for her visit. Once a former daycare parent/current psychopath filed a totally ridiculous and untrue complaint against me because she was mad at me for not taking time out of my weekend to go with her while she got a tattoo. That was nuts! The licensing consultant who came out told me not to discuss the matter with anyone, but I did anyway. It was my reputation and career on the line, not his! I told every single family in my care and I told the family that interviewed with me that night. I had nothing to hide, so I had no problem telling them about it, even though I was told not to. Every single family fully supported me because of my full disclosure. I also gave the licensing consultant the names and phone numbers of not only the current families that were in my care then, but the names and numbers of all of my past families that were in my care and the names and numbers of people that I had worked with at the center before I opened up my own daycare. Like I said before, my license has some minor violations like not having the right kind of garbage can in my bathroom and things like that, but it's never been anything that not minor.

So to the parent who wants to observe her daycare provider, you may want to ask yourself why you want to do it. Will you be satisfied with observing once or will you feel the need to keep observing until you catch her messing up. If you are that concerned, then you may want to find a new provider. I may get flamed for that, and that's OK because I stand by my post. The time to observe your provider is before they start. It really seems like you don't trust her and if you don't then maybe it's time to find a different situation for your child.
Reply
Unregistered 04:50 PM 06-23-2010
I was recently told by a childcare facility that it is against the rules for parents to visit during daycare hours - well that seemed ridiculous to me. I wanted to know if that were true. If yes, why. If no, why would she say that. Afraid to have unexpected visits? That would make me afraid to use her! I donít want to leave my kids anywhere I am not allowed to be.
Reply
Michael 05:42 PM 06-23-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I was recently told by a childcare facility that it is against the rules for parents to visit during daycare hours - well that seemed ridiculous to me. I wanted to know if that were true. If yes, why. If no, why would she say that. Afraid to have unexpected visits? That would make me afraid to use her! I don’t want to leave my kids anywhere I am not allowed to be.
Suggest you click on some of the keywords "Tags" a the bottom left corner for more related posts. Also, you can check with you states regulations: https://www.daycare.com/states.html
Reply
judytrickett 06:47 PM 06-23-2010
I think the end all be all of this thread is that daycare is about TRUST. If a parent can not trust their provider then it's time to find another provider.

All my parents trust me (or so I like to think they do). If I felt a parent did not trust me I would see to it that they no longer had care here. There MUST be trust or it just does not work.
Reply
Tags:monitor, naptime visits, trust, visitation, visiting
Reply Up