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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Business Decisons....Agh
actaktmdt 11:30 AM 06-25-2010
What to do....

My part time girl is now coming in the evenings two nights a week now instead of m-t for about 4 hours like she used to. Mom is waiting to hear about funding and putting her in pre-k, because it will be cheaper for her to do so...I would like to fill her daytime spot with the daycare mom who has now called 3 times to check to see if a spot has opened up yet (she really wants her son here)......however there are a couple of reasons why I am unsure about doing so

1. Potential new full time client is related to my the dc family so if an issue were to occur (i doubt it but possible) both families could walk and that would loose a huge chunk of income.

2. Family of 3 has not yet determined if oldest is going to preschool this fall yet or not. They are waiting to see how they are $ wise i believe. If she does she most likely will not return here but brothers will stay her and she will go to grandmas

3 (EMOSKS Girls this doesn't leave this board!, for those of you wondering I know them in real life) We are starting to try to get pg with our second child. So if i did fill my spot, I would have to terminate newest person due to ratios...Im not sure its all that professional to bring someone in and let them go....

were not hurting for money but it would be nice to have some extra


thoughts and ideas
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emosks 11:57 AM 06-25-2010
We are currently holding a spot open for Sabrina's "love child" that is yet to be conceived. I would not fill it but that is how I run business. I wouldn't want to terminate someone just because we were having another baby. The daycare search isn't easy for parents and they are choosing you based on trust. KWIM?
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gbcc 01:03 PM 06-25-2010
I hate to say this, but your heading kind of answers the question. "Business Decision". I know you said you are not hurting but, things could easily change kwim? A family could loose their job or have an illness. It may take some time to get pregnant so you may be looking at having this family for a full year before you terminate. A lot of things change even in 6 months so you may not even end up terminating. I try to live in the now rather than the what ifs.
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actaktmdt 12:02 PM 06-26-2010
Originally Posted by gbcc:
I hate to say this, but your heading kind of answers the question. "Business Decision". I know you said you are not hurting but, things could easily change kwim? A family could loose their job or have an illness. It may take some time to get pregnant so you may be looking at having this family for a full year before you terminate. A lot of things change even in 6 months so you may not even end up terminating. I try to live in the now rather than the what ifs.
Your right its a bussiness decison. I am just not sure what the best way is for me to go.
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professionalmom 01:56 PM 06-26-2010
I agree with gbcc, anything can happen in the time between now and you actually have #2. It could take 6 months to get pregnant. DH & I only went without protection twice and got DD! Then when trying for #2, we were actively trying for 3 months before it happened. Then #2 split into 2 identical babies, due in Nov.! Since I have 4-5 more months to go, I'm concerned about taking on too many, just like you. Right now I can have 5 (DD would be #6) paying clients, but by Nov. I would have to term 2 clients to stay within my limits. Right now, I am so low, it's not much of a concern, but I want to take on as many as possible for now because we'll need the extra $$ when #2 & #3 get here and my potential DC spots drops.
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actaktmdt 02:41 PM 06-30-2010
Would u disclose to the new clients this information?
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emosks 06:41 PM 06-30-2010
Disclose what....that you are trying to get PG? Absolutely. I would be upset if I came to you for daycare and then possibly within 10 or so months start looking again? If you are upfront with me and let me know there might be a chance then you would be more likely to get a good referral from me in the future. Would you want your daycare to be honest with you? Treat your families how you would want to be treated.
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professionalmom 07:06 PM 06-30-2010
Originally Posted by emosks:
Disclose what....that you are trying to get PG? Absolutely. I would be upset if I came to you for daycare and then possibly within 10 or so months start looking again? If you are upfront with me and let me know there might be a chance then you would be more likely to get a good referral from me in the future. Would you want your daycare to be honest with you? Treat your families how you would want to be treated.
I personally told my clients that my husband and I wanted to have #2, but that was the extent of it. To say "we're trying", seems very personal to me. Who needs to know that I had ovulation tests in my bathroom drawer? Or that we are scheduling intimacy for those "optimum" days? And if it didn't happen right away and there ended up being a problem, you wouldn't want to deal with the awkward questions of "is there something wrong?" I think what goes on between a husband and a wife, behind closed doors, is no one else's business. And that includes what the intended outcome is.

But I do think it's nice to be upfront about, "we do plan to have more children and if and when we find out there is one on the way, you will be one of the first to know." That leaves it open, but doesn't disclose when you are trying. Plus, if it doesn't happen, you can skirt the questions with, "We're just not ready yet."

I, personally, met my clients at the door with the biggest grin on my face and almost jumping up and down, just dying to tell them that we're pregnant. Most of them were very excited for us. One DCM is pregnant and due about a month before me, but since I'm having twins, I could deliver right around the time she does. So it's great for both of us. My other family is moving out of state in a month. And for the ones I interview, I assure them that I will only be closed for the days I am in the hospital. Once I'm home, I will have my mom and MIL here to help for a couple weeks. Plus, I plan to bring in an assistant toward the end. So, I make sure they know that it will not affect them much.
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emosks 12:12 PM 07-01-2010
Originally Posted by professionalmom:
I personally told my clients that my husband and I wanted to have #2, but that was the extent of it. To say "we're trying", seems very personal to me. Who needs to know that I had ovulation tests in my bathroom drawer? Or that we are scheduling intimacy for those "optimum" days? And if it didn't happen right away and there ended up being a problem, you wouldn't want to deal with the awkward questions of "is there something wrong?" I think what goes on between a husband and a wife, behind closed doors, is no one else's business. And that includes what the intended outcome is.

But I do think it's nice to be upfront about, "we do plan to have more children and if and when we find out there is one on the way, you will be one of the first to know." That leaves it open, but doesn't disclose when you are trying. Plus, if it doesn't happen, you can skirt the questions with, "We're just not ready yet."

I, personally, met my clients at the door with the biggest grin on my face and almost jumping up and down, just dying to tell them that we're pregnant. Most of them were very excited for us. One DCM is pregnant and due about a month before me, but since I'm having twins, I could deliver right around the time she does. So it's great for both of us. My other family is moving out of state in a month. And for the ones I interview, I assure them that I will only be closed for the days I am in the hospital. Once I'm home, I will have my mom and MIL here to help for a couple weeks. Plus, I plan to bring in an assistant toward the end. So, I make sure they know that it will not affect them much.
I didn't mean that she had to tell her parents that she is planning on having a lot of sex with her husband soon. I meant that she needs to be upfront. There are classy ways of putting it and I would hope that she does.
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Janet 01:07 PM 07-01-2010
I didn't know what else to title this, but reading the last few posts actually gave me a fit of giggles because I got a mental image of daycare parents rummaging around through bathroom drawers!!!

Lord help me, I am so immature! No wonder kids like me so much...I don't think I'll ever grow up and act my age, hehehe!!!!
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emosks 01:14 PM 07-01-2010
Originally Posted by Janet:
I didn't know what else to title this, but reading the last few posts actually gave me a fit of giggles because I got a mental image of daycare parents rummaging around through bathroom drawers!!!

Lord help me, I am so immature! No wonder kids like me so much...I don't think I'll ever grow up and act my age, hehehe!!!!
We are friends with all of our families and knew them before daycare...so when some of the moms talk about personal things it's hard to not giggle when we see the dads at pickup/dropoffs. Talk about feeling immature!! LOL!!
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Janet 01:22 PM 07-01-2010
OMG! I'm glad that I'm not the only one who ever has to suppress giggles when parents pick up and I know personal stuff about them! The only difference is that it's not the parents who are giving me the comedy gems that make me struggle to stifle the giggles. It's the kids! It's hard not to laugh when a kid tells me that her daddy makes "huge poops" and his "butt hurts" and not laugh when he picks up!

When my older sisters were little, one of them told the gas man the following:

"My daddy sleeps on top of my mommy and my sisters pees her pants."

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Daycare Mommy 02:43 PM 07-01-2010
I agree with pm and gbcc. Just because you aren't hurting for money now doesn't mean you won't be in dire financial circumstances in 6 months. I've BTDT many times; the unexpected, that's life!

And I learned long ago not to count my chickens before they've hatched. I wouldn't make any business decisions based on the possibility of a future pregnancy/baby. It took us over a year to conceive our first. You just never know how your story will unfold until it does.
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professionalmom 04:48 PM 07-01-2010
Originally Posted by Janet:
OMG! I'm glad that I'm not the only one who ever has to suppress giggles when parents pick up and I know personal stuff about them! The only difference is that it's not the parents who are giving me the comedy gems that make me struggle to stifle the giggles. It's the kids! It's hard not to laugh when a kid tells me that her daddy makes "huge poops" and his "butt hurts" and not laugh when he picks up!

When my older sisters were little, one of them told the gas man the following:

"My daddy sleeps on top of my mommy and my sisters pees her pants."

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have one! My grandparents lived along a river and many of us cousins would go swimming in the river. Cousin A was the same age as me (approx. 13) and cousin A's sister (cousin B) was approx. 5 years old. Every Sunday everyone in my family got together at grandma & grandpa's after church. So imagine a huge family gathering with my grandparent's 7 children (and their spouses) and 30 grandkids (some were already married). When we got done swimming, we went to the bathroom to take our suits off, jump in the shower and wash the sand and dirt off, dry off, and get dressed. No problem, right. (FYI - I'll be "C") Well, as we all sit down to eat, Cousin B (5 yr old) pipes up and says, "A & C have hair on their pee pees!" Right in front of the entire family! Thank God I can laugh about it now, but back then at 13, I thought I would die!
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professionalmom 04:51 PM 07-01-2010
Originally Posted by emosks:
I didn't mean that she had to tell her parents that she is planning on having a lot of sex with her husband soon. I meant that she needs to be upfront. There are classy ways of putting it and I would hope that she does.
Oh, I didn't mean about the sex. It's just that when someone says, "We're trying", people tend to think, "oh, we know what you'll be doing tonight!" *wink, wink*. Even though we all like to think we're above that childish giggly immaturity, it's still there and the mind still goes into the gutter.
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actaktmdt 09:20 PM 07-01-2010
apparently I stirred up the pot, thanks girls. While i wasnt asking for ways to be untruthfull, nor dishonest to clients, I dont want the constent questions as to why Im not pg yet. Miscarriages run rampent in my family and I miscarried in May (a first for me), On top of that, we arent even telling people we are trying other than the fact I mentioned it here.
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Crystal 09:44 PM 07-01-2010
Okay , here's what I would do....

1. Potential new full time client is related to my the dc family so if an issue were to occur (i doubt it but possible) both families could walk and that would loose a huge chunk of income.

I agree that it could be a potential issue, should something happen that causes both families to leave...BUT, my experience is, if you have family members of a current client come to you because of a referral from said current family, that can only mean that they are highly satisfied with the quality of care you offer, and this MOST LIKELY will not be an issue. I LOVE having families send their family members to me - I currently have two families that referred their cousins, and those children are with me for preschool only (mom's don't work, they only need preschool), and they LOVE it here - it can be considered JOB SECURITY - they can keep you in business!

2. Family of 3 has not yet determined if oldest is going to preschool this fall yet or not. They are waiting to see how they are $ wise i believe. If she does she most likely will not return here but brothers will stay her and she will go to grandmas

That is an open slot - let Mom know that you need a definitive answer by end of next week as you have a family interested in securing the space for their child if it is available. This one is probably the most feasible of all of your options. If Mom doesn't have an answer to you by end of week, make the decision for her, whatever it is you decide.

3 (EMOSKS Girls this doesn't leave this board!, for those of you wondering I know them in real life) We are starting to try to get pg with our second child. So if i did fill my spot, I would have to terminate newest person due to ratios...Im not sure its all that professional to bring someone in and let them go....

Would you neccessarily have to terminate the most recent family? Are there any clients who you have considered terminating? If not, that's great and go with the most recent client for ending the contract. If you do, consider the pros and cons of keeping/terminating ANY of your family contracts and decide which is best for YOUR family, taking into consideration, of course, how it will effect the family you decide to let go. Then, you write a respectful, with regret, letter of termination to the client you choose to let go ( I know that's a huge decision, I DO NOT take terminating families lightly,hence, my reason for being respectful. And, I wouldn't take this step until after the answer to your BIGGEST concern, listed next.)

I don't think you need to share any information about TRYING to get pregnant. When you ARE pregnant you can give parents approximately 8 & 1/2 months notice that you will be filling an infant space with your baby! By then, children will have gotten older, some may have moved on, who knows? Your ratios will work out because you will make the necessary changes to make it work. Until then, enjoy TRYING to get pregnant, and I wish you a healthy, full-term pregnancy!



BTW, your secret isn't a secret if you post it here, this is a wide open public forum, any of your parents could read that
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emosks 05:22 AM 07-02-2010
I don't think the pot got stirred nor do I think that you would intentionally be dishonest with your families. You asked for our opinions and you got them. Some what you wanted to hear...some not. That is what happens when you are on a public forum! You got some great advice...take it for what it's worth.
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misol 08:25 AM 07-02-2010
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Okay , here's what I would do....

1. Potential new full time client is related to my the dc family so if an issue were to occur (i doubt it but possible) both families could walk and that would loose a huge chunk of income.

I agree that it could be a potential issue, should something happen that causes both families to leave...BUT, my experience is, if you have family members of a current client come to you because of a referral from said current family, that can only mean that they are highly satisfied with the quality of care you offer, and this MOST LIKELY will not be an issue. I LOVE having families send their family members to me - I currently have two families that referred their cousins, and those children are with me for preschool only (mom's don't work, they only need preschool), and they LOVE it here - it can be considered JOB SECURITY - they can keep you in business!

2. Family of 3 has not yet determined if oldest is going to preschool this fall yet or not. They are waiting to see how they are $ wise i believe. If she does she most likely will not return here but brothers will stay her and she will go to grandmas

That is an open slot - let Mom know that you need a definitive answer by end of next week as you have a family interested in securing the space for their child if it is available. This one is probably the most feasible of all of your options. If Mom doesn't have an answer to you by end of week, make the decision for her, whatever it is you decide.

3 (EMOSKS Girls this doesn't leave this board!, for those of you wondering I know them in real life) We are starting to try to get pg with our second child. So if i did fill my spot, I would have to terminate newest person due to ratios...Im not sure its all that professional to bring someone in and let them go....

Would you neccessarily have to terminate the most recent family? Are there any clients who you have considered terminating? If not, that's great and go with the most recent client for ending the contract. If you do, consider the pros and cons of keeping/terminating ANY of your family contracts and decide which is best for YOUR family, taking into consideration, of course, how it will effect the family you decide to let go. Then, you write a respectful, with regret, letter of termination to the client you choose to let go ( I know that's a huge decision, I DO NOT take terminating families lightly,hence, my reason for being respectful. And, I wouldn't take this step until after the answer to your BIGGEST concern, listed next.)

I don't think you need to share any information about TRYING to get pregnant. When you ARE pregnant you can give parents approximately 8 & 1/2 months notice that you will be filling an infant space with your baby! By then, children will have gotten older, some may have moved on, who knows? Your ratios will work out because you will make the necessary changes to make it work. Until then, enjoy TRYING to get pregnant, and I wish you a healthy, full-term pregnancy!



BTW, your secret isn't a secret if you post it here, this is a wide open public forum, any of your parents could read that
I agree with Crystal with one exception. I think that 8.5 months might be too soon for notice - especially since you have a history of miscarriages in your family. I would wait until after you are out of the first trimester. I think that 6 months would be plenty of notice for the family that you decide to terminate.
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nannyde 09:04 AM 07-02-2010
I would never talk to the day care parents about any possible future thing that would affect their slot. I wouldn't tell them about a pregnancy until I absolutely had to and even then I wouldn't discuss their child's slot because of the new baby.

When you are ready to make a decision then you make it. So much can happen between now and the birth of a baby. It doesn't have anything to do with them until it actually DOES have something to do with them.
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Janet 12:05 PM 07-02-2010
but I would probably keep a pregnancy of mine under wraps until I was out of the first trimester. Not because of any reason except that I have issues about letting anyone know about it until I'm out of the woods for the most part as far as miscarriages go. I have one child but I've had 6 pregnancies (5 ending in miscarriages) so I never really liked to tell anyone other than my husband until I hit the 12 week mark. I made the mistake with one of those miscarriages of telling everyone when I found out (which was at 5 1/2 weeks) and I miscarried at 11 weeks. I had to deal with everyone asking me how my pregnancy was going and having to explain what happened. I'm done with kids now, but if I were in the OP's shoes, I wouldn't mention any future plans and once I became pregnant, I wouldn't even tell anyone that until I was probably between 22 and 28 weeks along. Frankly, I'd consider it personal information until I decided to share it.
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