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Old 08-25-2010, 10:55 AM
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kendallina kendallina is online now
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Default Your Kids with Daycare Kids..

Hi, I'm new to this and I'm wondering how you handle the daycare rules with your own children. Do they follow all the daycare rules when daycare kids are there? Here's my dilemma...

I have a two children that come for child care. I run a preschool starting Monday and I have two more children coming to preschool. There are a few rules that daycare kids have that my daughter doesn't normally have. Like, eating only at the table. When no one else is here we let my daughter eat her snacks in the livingroom (yeh, I know, not the best idea, but anyways...). So, when I have daycare kids here, I don't allow them to eat in the livingroom, but my daughter (21 months) obviously doesn't understand why sometimes I allow her to eat in the livingroom and sometimes I don't.

So, do you think I should make DD follow the no eating in the livingroom rule with daycare kids here? Or do you think it's okay if she's allowed to occasionally eat in the livingroom and the other kids (ages 2-3) will understand that they cannot but she can...that hardly seems fair to them.

For a little background info...my daughter is extremely low weight and was diagnosed failure to thrive when she was little, so there are some battles that we just prefer to not have. She also takes a longer time to eat because she has low muscle tone (even in her mouth) and chews pretty slowly. So, the other children finish before her and go to play in the livingroom and she always wants to go with them, but she's still eating.

If you made it through all of this, thank you. I'd like to hear what you think of this situation and how to handle daycare rules with your own children.... thanks!
Katy
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:25 AM
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my children (all 4 of them) follow the same rules as the daycare kids, its so much easier, every once in a while I let them eat where they want but its easier if they eat together. I would start introducing your dd to the same rules as the rest of the kids because then she is going to think that she can do whatever she wants and the daycare kids may get angry and start complaining to their parents.
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:27 AM
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I should add, that by eating with the rest of the group your dd may learn to eat faster too, I have some that are so slow (like 1 hour slow) that I had to start clamping down, so if you ate that slow you didn't get dessert, which to them is the world, amazing how fast kids can eat and eat it all when you start setting boundries.
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:32 AM
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When daycare is here - my kids follow the same rules at the daycare kids. When they are not here they can do what they want. My kids are 2 and 4.

I treat my kids exactly the same as the daycare kids during hours.
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:32 AM
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Thanks for your response. I *know* I probably should have her eating only in the dining room, but Dh and I like eating in the livingroom as well and don't really want to switch. It's not even that we are watching tv while eating, it's just so much more comfy...hahaha. Maybe this is what I need to do, though. I agree with you that i don't want the dck to get mad about it, with just having the two that I currently have, they barely seem to notice, so I'm kind of hoping that's how it is with the other two.

Also, she will take longer to eat than other children because of medical issues, so I don't think having others around will make her go any faster, I wish...

Katy
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Heather View Post
When daycare is here - my kids follow the same rules at the daycare kids. When they are not here they can do what they want. My kids are 2 and 4.

I treat my kids exactly the same as the daycare kids during hours.
Does the 2-year old do okay with different rules when daycare kids are there? I think in a few months Lily might understand, but she doesn't right now...ugh, only a few more months...thanks for your response.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kendallina View Post
Does the 2-year old do okay with different rules when daycare kids are there? I think in a few months Lily might understand, but she doesn't right now...ugh, only a few more months...thanks for your response.
There are times he throws his fits, and I try to explain to him even though he barely understands ( he turns three in Feb ). But it's too bad..I think the biggest reason I do this is the older kids may go home and tell their parents...Heather made me do this but didnt make Jake. Thats a conversation I would rather avoid...I dont want the parents thinking I favor my kids over theirs and let mine do whatever they want because I really don't - if anything I am more strict on my own sometimes during hours.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:08 PM
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I have it both ways -- my 8 & 10 year olds usually don't follow daycare rules, but my 3 year old does. When the dc kids see my older two doing something they can't (like playing down in the basement, or going outside whenever they want), I just tell them they aren't daycare kids, so they don't have the same rules. My dc kids are mostly toddlers, and they still get it. But all 3 of my own kids also know what I mean when I say "Daycare rules!". If they're doing something that I don't want them to be doing in front of the daycare kids (like climbing up the slide in the backyard), it's my way of reminding them that they need to follow the same rules as the dc kids for the time-being.

So, it could work for you. Since it's your house, you get to make the rules! If your daughter eats better in the living room for medical reasons, then let her (just watch out for the other kids trying to steal her food ). I think it's totally fair to tell the dc kids that because it's her house, she gets to eat in the living room. As long as you're consistent with the rules, the kids will accept them.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by countrymom View Post
my children (all 4 of them) follow the same rules as the daycare kids, its so much easier, every once in a while I let them eat where they want but its easier if they eat together. I would start introducing your dd to the same rules as the rest of the kids because then she is going to think that she can do whatever she wants and the daycare kids may get angry and start complaining to their parents.
Mine follow the dc rules too. They know some things are different when the dcks aren't here (they can play upstairs, snacks are different, etc.) but during the day they just follow all the same rules as the other kids.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:21 PM
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I make my kids follow the same rules as daycare kids. For me, it's easier to have everyone following the same rules. When the dcks are not here, I will occasionally allow my kids to eat a snack in the living room. We'll also do a family picnic in the living room for supper, which is something I wouldn't do with the dcks.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:25 PM
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I agree with the above posts somewhat! I treat my kids somewhat like daycare kids throughout the majority of the day, but there are times they get to do something that daycare doesn't and to me this is OKAY! I do daycare, I chose to do daycare my children did NOT!! My kids LIVE in daycare and are here all day everyday, every hour of daycare! Sometimes they get a little different treatment and things a little different then daycare because no matter what this is THEIR HOUSE!! I see it like this, the daycare kids get to go home and do special things, sometimes they get to take a day off with just a parent and my kids can get some of these priveleges as well!!! Daycare kids come here all the time and tell my kids that they got to do this or that and to me it is no different than my kids being able to do things a little differently! As far as the kids tattling to their parents, I have never had a problem! I am sure they have said things to their parents, but I think my parents all know that is just the way it is!! My kids are 3 and 5 almost 4 and 6 and I am due in Dec!! I don't think there is anything wrong with letting your daughter eat in the living room if that is what she prefers!! I am sure she will get bored with it and want to be with the other kids eventually, chose your battles wisely!! To me this isn't a battle worth fighting!! It isn't alot that this happens, but sometimes it happens and I don't see anything wrong with it, it is life, no matter what life isn't fair, life isn't equal and it is an early lesson learned!! : ) If the parents say anything I would just reply back with her health issues! or explain to the parents before they say anything to you!! Easier sounding on the ears of your explanation of why she is treated different then hearing their own child tell them that your daughter got to do this, but they didn't!! I have talked with all my parents and they all understand!! Good luck and don't stress, like I said they usually get bored with it and want to be part of the group!! Chose your battles wisely!! : )
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Old 08-25-2010, 01:03 PM
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just to let you know, we are couch eaters too, sometimes its so much easier and comfier than the table (I wish we had more seating) but when the dck's go home then my kids can do what they want.

I have to agree with JJplaycare, you are so right! My kids always have the kids here and it does get annoying to them, but I had it last week. I have these 2 brothers that come once a week (10 and 6) the 6 yr old was coming 2 times a week and then going to school---well the 10 yr old can eat and I mean I've never seen a kid eat so much, but I limit how much here, he just keeps asking. Well last week, my ds came in and wanted a poptart and even thou my kids know the rule (that you have to share with everyone) well there was only 1 poptart so my son grabs it anyways, and I kid you not, the dcb came in and asked if he can have one too. I tell him I don't have anymore, so he said, well then why does nick get to have one. I then tell hime "because he lives here" I have a food issue problem with this kid, like I said he is always asking for food ( and he's heading toward obesity) even drinks, they will drink and drink like they have never seen a beverage before, its crazy. Sorry I highjacked the thread. But anyways I think you need to play it by ear. Like if the kids can't go downstairs then I wouldn't let your child go either till they go home, kwim.
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