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Old 09-27-2012, 01:12 PM
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Default 2 Year Old DCG Doesn't Want To Leave EVER

I have a 2 year old DCG that never wants to leave. She gets so happy when her mom comes but then doesn't want to leave. She throws a tantrum, cries, screams, kicks and hits. EVERY SINGLE DAY! She has been with me for a full month now and its been like this since day 1! I get her ready...shoes on, coat if she has one. Once her mom knocks she runs to the door so happy to see her mom and BAM throws a tantrum. I have no clue what to do with her! Yesterday I practically shoved them out the door! But she threw a tantrum right outside the door. It gets so tiring.

On top of not wanting to leave, she gets a little violent with the other little girl here. She will push or pull so they fall. AND she is an obsessive hugger. Wants to hug the kids here or at the park all the time. but she HUGS so hard that she is like choking them and she is red in the face. I have to have a NO TOUCHING policy cause she always wants to touch them.
What to do??
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Old 09-27-2012, 01:34 PM
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At the end of the day, you put her coat and shoes on her. When her mom shows up to get her, you hand her over QUICKLY and say "goodnight, see you tomorrow" and close the door.

ALL tantruming needs to happen outside of your house and outside of your jurisdiction.

Mom needs to deal with it not you. If you need to talk to mom about anything that happened during the day, call her later but do NOT try to talk while this mess is going on. Simply hand child over swift and quick.
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Old 09-27-2012, 02:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
At the end of the day, you put her coat and shoes on her. When her mom shows up to get her, you hand her over QUICKLY and say "goodnight, see you tomorrow" and close the door.

ALL tantruming needs to happen outside of your house and outside of your jurisdiction.

Mom needs to deal with it not you. If you need to talk to mom about anything that happened during the day, call her later but do NOT try to talk while this mess is going on. Simply hand child over swift and quick.
I agree!
But let mom know you are planning to do this to help with the transition. Its the "quick like a bandaid" approach.
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Old 09-27-2012, 02:34 PM
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I hope it works...mom is a softie. DCG2 slapped her once and she laughed it off...oy vey
thanks for the help. much appreciated
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Old 09-27-2012, 02:44 PM
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She is 2 so she should understand well. Tell her YOur mom will be here in 5 minutes. You are going to behave nicly and go home. NO CRYING. Go home with mom.
Just elling them what you expect can work sometimes. Try to state it positive but tell her no sreaming or crying. Remind her everyday. That works for me alot.
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Old 09-27-2012, 05:07 PM
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She is 2 so she should understand well. Tell her YOur mom will be here in 5 minutes. You are going to behave nicly and go home. NO CRYING. Go home with mom.
Just elling them what you expect can work sometimes. Try to state it positive but tell her no sreaming or crying. Remind her everyday. That works for me alot.
This worked for me, too, with one of my tougher kids. I had been told how to get him ready to go home (don't let him look out the window so he can't see his mother coming, don't talk about going home, have his shoes and jacket on.....) The first day he was with me, his mother walked in and all he!! broke loose. He kicked my tv, tried to tear my uphostery, hit me and the other kids and eventually, when his mother picked him up, ended up gouging her chest from one side to the other with his fingernails. I was in shock that a kid could be that bad! The next day, I very firmly told him he was never to behave like that again in my home. I told him exactly what I wanted him to do - get his shoes/jacket on, stand quietly at the door, say hello to his mother and leave quietly. He did! Never had a problem with him after that.

I think Blackcat's suggestion is more likely to work for most "wild ones", though!
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Old 09-27-2012, 11:10 PM
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Originally Posted by e.j. View Post
This worked for me, too, with one of my tougher kids. I had been told how to get him ready to go home (don't let him look out the window so he can't see his mother coming, don't talk about going home, have his shoes and jacket on.....) The first day he was with me, his mother walked in and all he!! broke loose. He kicked my tv, tried to tear my uphostery, hit me and the other kids and eventually, when his mother picked him up, ended up gouging her chest from one side to the other with his fingernails. I was in shock that a kid could be that bad! The next day, I very firmly told him he was never to behave like that again in my home. I told him exactly what I wanted him to do - get his shoes/jacket on, stand quietly at the door, say hello to his mother and leave quietly. He did! Never had a problem with him after that.

I think Blackcat's suggestion is more likely to work for most "wild ones", though!

Wow, I can only imagine!! I have not had to go through this. I have had them want to continue playing and they need a bit o coaxing out the door with mom....but never violent behavior.
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