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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Underwear
MissAnn 05:27 AM 12-09-2015
Would you keep a child in underwear who is doing great, except for occasional poop accidents......but the parents bring him in pull-ups and don't do underwear at home?
I've got myself in a predicament. This boy was ready to be potty trained. I told the parents he is ready and they said they would start potty training . They never brought underwear so I went ahead and bought underwear and here he is totally potty trained except an occasional pooping in his underwear. He comes to me in pull-ups and I change him into underwear. I was hoping the parents would see how ready he is when I told them how well he was doing here. Every day I tell them how good he's doing but they keep saying that he still poops in his pullup. To me that is just part of the process! No one ever said potty training is going to be easy.
Honestly it's easier for me to keep him in underwear. It just bothers me that I have done every bit of the work of potty training and they are not doing it.
And yes, I know I brought this upon myself. No lectures Please. I'm glad he is in underwear here. I just wish the parents would come on board. I usually don't accept kids who are not potty trained and they knew this from the beginning. I let this boy come with the agreement that we would be potty training.
I've got myself in a predicament. This boy was ready to be potty trained. I told the parents he is ready and they said they would start potty training . They never brought underwear so I went ahead and bought underwear and here he is totally potty trained except an occasional pooping in his underwear. He comes to me in pull-ups and I change him into underwear. I was hoping the parents would see how ready he is when I told them how well he was doing here. Every day I tell them how good he's doing but they keep saying that he still poops in his pullup. To me that is just part of the process! No one ever said potty training is going to be easy.
Honestly it's easier for me to keep him in underwear. It just bothers me that I have done every bit of the work of potty training and they are not doing it.
And yes, I know I brought this upon myself. No lectures Please. I'm glad he is in underwear here. I just wish the parents would come on board. I usually don't accept kids who are not potty trained and they knew this from the beginning. I let this boy come with the agreement that we would be potty training.
Fiddlesticks 05:43 AM 12-09-2015
I usually ask the parents to keep the child in underwear over a weekend, and then we go straight to underwear here. I will not assist potty training a child in pull-ups. They are either ready and will wear underwear, or not ready and will wear diapers. When the parents balk at the underwear only policy I know the PARENTS are not ready! Other than the normal occasionally accident, the children in my care have been super easy to transition to using the potty. Although I have to say, most of them do hold their poop all day when they are first in underwear, and do the whole pooping in their pants thing at home, so I have been lucky there. And, yes, I believe the pooping in their pants in the beginning stages of potty training to be absolutely normal and expected. I have only ever had one child who was "poop trained" before being "pee trained" it is just the way it is. Pull ups prolong the issue because one of the motivators for children to use the potty every time is the time and trouble of the clean up process when they go in their pants. The no muss no fuss option of the pull up circumvents the natural consequence of not using the potty.
In your situation, I would keep him in underwear, but I would insist the parents provide them/bring him in underwear. If he is potty trained for you---yay!
the parents will have to figure it out at home on their own.
In your situation, I would keep him in underwear, but I would insist the parents provide them/bring him in underwear. If he is potty trained for you---yay!
the parents will have to figure it out at home on their own.
MissAnn 06:08 AM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by Fiddlesticks:
I usually ask the parents to keep the child in underwear over a weekend, and then we go straight to underwear here. I will not assist potty training a child in pull-ups. They are either ready and will wear underwear, or not ready and will wear diapers. When the parents balk at the underwear only policy I know the PARENTS are not ready! Other than the normal occasionally accident, the children in my care have been super easy to transition to using the potty. Although I have to say, most of them do hold their poop all day when they are first in underwear, and do the whole pooping in their pants thing at home, so I have been lucky there. And, yes, I believe the pooping in their pants in the beginning stages of potty training to be absolutely normal and expected. I have only ever had one child who was "poop trained" before being "pee trained" it is just the way it is. Pull ups prolong the issue because one of the motivators for children to use the potty every time is the time and trouble of the clean up process when they go in their pants. The no muss no fuss option of the pull up circumvents the natural consequence of not using the potty.
In your situation, I would keep him in underwear, but I would insist the parents provide them/bring him in underwear. If he is potty trained for you---yay! the parents will have to figure it out at home on their own.
I totally agree! Mistakenly I thought this parent was gung ho about potty training. In fact when he first started here she called me one night and said he went potty in the toilet and asked if she should bring him in underwear the next day! Today he came in a pull-up and of course it was wet. If he had been in underwear he would've waited to go on the toilet. Today I am going to ask her to start bringing him in underwear. She can do what she wants at home but here he is potty trained...... Just not completely poop trained.I usually ask the parents to keep the child in underwear over a weekend, and then we go straight to underwear here. I will not assist potty training a child in pull-ups. They are either ready and will wear underwear, or not ready and will wear diapers. When the parents balk at the underwear only policy I know the PARENTS are not ready! Other than the normal occasionally accident, the children in my care have been super easy to transition to using the potty. Although I have to say, most of them do hold their poop all day when they are first in underwear, and do the whole pooping in their pants thing at home, so I have been lucky there. And, yes, I believe the pooping in their pants in the beginning stages of potty training to be absolutely normal and expected. I have only ever had one child who was "poop trained" before being "pee trained" it is just the way it is. Pull ups prolong the issue because one of the motivators for children to use the potty every time is the time and trouble of the clean up process when they go in their pants. The no muss no fuss option of the pull up circumvents the natural consequence of not using the potty.
In your situation, I would keep him in underwear, but I would insist the parents provide them/bring him in underwear. If he is potty trained for you---yay!
the parents will have to figure it out at home on their own.
Blackcat31 06:18 AM 12-09-2015
If you don't have issues cleaning up poopy underwear from time to time, buying underwear for other people's kids and doing most the work, I don't see what the issue is...
If those things don't bother you and it's easier to do what you've been doing then keep doing it.
If it ain't broke, why fix it?
If those things don't bother you and it's easier to do what you've been doing then keep doing it.
If it ain't broke, why fix it?
MissAnn 06:21 AM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
If you don't have issues cleaning up poopy underwear from time to time, buying underwear for other people's kids and doing most the work, I don't see what the issue is...
If those things don't bother you and it's easier to do what you've been doing then keep doing it.
If it ain't broke, why fix it?
Because it's not fixed. Of course it bothers me to change poopy underwear but that is part of the process. It's HER job to potty train her child at home. This was our agreement. It's hindering his progress in getting poop trained. Most days he waits till he gets home and poops in his pullup.If you don't have issues cleaning up poopy underwear from time to time, buying underwear for other people's kids and doing most the work, I don't see what the issue is...
If those things don't bother you and it's easier to do what you've been doing then keep doing it.
If it ain't broke, why fix it?
Blackcat31 06:28 AM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Because it's not fixed. Of course it bothers me to change poopy underwear but that is part of the process. It's HER job to potty train her child at home. This was our agreement. It's hindering his progress in getting poop trained. Most days he waits till he gets home and poops in his pullup.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be snarky.... Because it's not fixed. Of course it bothers me to change poopy underwear but that is part of the process. It's HER job to potty train her child at home. This was our agreement. It's hindering his progress in getting poop trained. Most days he waits till he gets home and poops in his pullup.
I guess I just read your post as if it really wasn't that big of a deal and you thought it was easier to do what you are currently doing so my first thoughts were if it's easier, then keep doing it...kwim?
Otherwise I disagree that changing poopy underwear is part of the process (for providers) as I will change poopy diapers but I haven't changed poopy underwear in years since revamping my potty training policies and leaving it ALL up to the parent. Changing poopy underwear is a parental responsibility.
My DCP's don't mention Pull ups or underwear until their child IS trained and if I were in your shoes, I'd tell the parents that they either need to get their child trained or he'll just have to stay in diapers until they decide their ready...as it's obvious their child is more than ready.
I don't parent parents and I've seen several cases over the last few years where I knew beyond a doubt that a child was more than ready but the parents weren't ready to start their part so the kid didn't get trained until later because its not MY kid and unless parents do their jobs I can't do mine.
rosieteddy 07:03 AM 12-09-2015
I also would just keep the child in pull-ups or diapers.After many years I revamped my policy.Child and parents had to be ready.Clearly if he's pooping his pants every day he is not.Parents like the easy part of throwaway pants (diapers -pull-ups).I would step back and retry after the holidays.Good luck,potty training was my least favorite .
MissAnn 07:04 AM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be snarky....
I guess I just read your post as if it really wasn't that big of a deal and you thought it was easier to do what you are currently doing so my first thoughts were if it's easier, then keep doing it...kwim?
Otherwise I disagree that changing poopy underwear is part of the process (for providers) as I will change poopy diapers but I haven't changed poopy underwear in years since revamping my potty training policies and leaving it ALL up to the parent. Changing poopy underwear is a parental responsibility.
My DCP's don't mention Pull ups or underwear until their child IS trained and if I were in your shoes, I'd tell the parents that they either need to get their child trained or he'll just have to stay in diapers until they decide their ready...as it's obvious their child is more than ready.
I don't parent parents and I've seen several cases over the last few years where I knew beyond a doubt that a child was more than ready but the parents weren't ready to start their part so the kid didn't get trained until later because its not MY kid and unless parents do their jobs I can't do mine.
I agree with you.....and yesterday I decided to keep the child in pullups. Poor kid was disappointed when I mentioned staying in pullups. I couldn't do it. I don't want him to backtrack. I am probably more motivated to get them in underwear quicker because my program is preschool. I don't take kids till they are 3 and potty trained. This year was different.....I lost all but one kid to kindergarten and then had a few surgeries at the time I get most of my calls for the new year. I lost my window of opportunity to replenish the crew. I took on 3 who were not potty trained. The youngest is now completely trained though I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be snarky....
I guess I just read your post as if it really wasn't that big of a deal and you thought it was easier to do what you are currently doing so my first thoughts were if it's easier, then keep doing it...kwim?
Otherwise I disagree that changing poopy underwear is part of the process (for providers) as I will change poopy diapers but I haven't changed poopy underwear in years since revamping my potty training policies and leaving it ALL up to the parent. Changing poopy underwear is a parental responsibility.
My DCP's don't mention Pull ups or underwear until their child IS trained and if I were in your shoes, I'd tell the parents that they either need to get their child trained or he'll just have to stay in diapers until they decide their ready...as it's obvious their child is more than ready.
I don't parent parents and I've seen several cases over the last few years where I knew beyond a doubt that a child was more than ready but the parents weren't ready to start their part so the kid didn't get trained until later because its not MY kid and unless parents do their jobs I can't do mine.
MissAnn 07:07 AM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by rosieteddy:
I also would just keep the child in pull-ups or diapers.After many years I revamped my policy.Child and parents had to be ready.Clearly if he's pooping his pants every day he is not.Parents like the easy part of throwaway pants (diapers -pull-ups).I would step back and retry after the holidays.Good luck,potty training was my least favorite .
I wish I had required parents to start at home. Maybe next time! I don't want to undo his progress. He only poops rarely in his underwear......actually 2 times in the last month. So....he is doing marvelously.....at least here! It's not the kid who I need to train....it's the parents! LOLI also would just keep the child in pull-ups or diapers.After many years I revamped my policy.Child and parents had to be ready.Clearly if he's pooping his pants every day he is not.Parents like the easy part of throwaway pants (diapers -pull-ups).I would step back and retry after the holidays.Good luck,potty training was my least favorite .
Former Teacher 12:58 PM 12-09-2015
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Would you keep a child in underwear who is doing great, except for occasional poop accidents......but the parents bring him in pull-ups and don't do underwear at home?
I've got myself in a predicament. This boy was ready to be potty trained. I told the parents he is ready and they said they would start potty training . They never brought underwear so I went ahead and bought underwear and here he is totally potty trained except an occasional pooping in his underwear. He comes to me in pull-ups and I change him into underwear. I was hoping the parents would see how ready he is when I told them how well he was doing here. Every day I tell them how good he's doing but they keep saying that he still poops in his pullup. To me that is just part of the process! No one ever said potty training is going to be easy.
Honestly it's easier for me to keep him in underwear. It just bothers me that I have done every bit of the work of potty training and they are not doing it.
And yes, I know I brought this upon myself. No lectures Please. I'm glad he is in underwear here. I just wish the parents would come on board. I usually don't accept kids who are not potty trained and they knew this from the beginning. I let this boy come with the agreement that we would be potty training.
Would you keep a child in underwear who is doing great, except for occasional poop accidents......but the parents bring him in pull-ups and don't do underwear at home?
I've got myself in a predicament. This boy was ready to be potty trained. I told the parents he is ready and they said they would start potty training . They never brought underwear so I went ahead and bought underwear and here he is totally potty trained except an occasional pooping in his underwear. He comes to me in pull-ups and I change him into underwear. I was hoping the parents would see how ready he is when I told them how well he was doing here. Every day I tell them how good he's doing but they keep saying that he still poops in his pullup. To me that is just part of the process! No one ever said potty training is going to be easy.
Honestly it's easier for me to keep him in underwear. It just bothers me that I have done every bit of the work of potty training and they are not doing it.
And yes, I know I brought this upon myself. No lectures Please. I'm glad he is in underwear here. I just wish the parents would come on board. I usually don't accept kids who are not potty trained and they knew this from the beginning. I let this boy come with the agreement that we would be potty training.
At my former center, I had a girl just like this boy. She would come to daycare in an overnight diaper/pull up (soaked no less) and parents expected us to put her in underwear here. She would be trained ALL day. No accidents whatsoever.
I finally had to write a nice letter telling the parents that it would help E tremendously if she were to be brought in underwear. Next day voila! Never a diaper or pull up was seen on her again. The father's excuse was that he didn't want her to wet on the 5 min drive to school.
Anyway, my advice is to do a letter and explain that it would help DCB. Also remind them that his enrollment was contingent on the fact that THEY would be doing their part in potty training.
Good luck!