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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>The Constant 'I Love Yous'
Brooksie 08:49 AM 10-01-2013
Does any one else have that one child that constantly says, "Miss ****? I love you." Super sweet at first, but now its all the time.. Like ALL THE TIME. Probably every 10-15 minutes. I always respond "I/we love you too ****" but its starting to annoy me. lol. I certainly don't want to make her feel that she's not loved here because she is, but anything repetitive is bound to get on your nerves. Any one else deal with this? Any suggestions for a helpful/supportive response?
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preschoolteacher 08:56 AM 10-01-2013
Awww... but I can see how it gets annoying. I'd say "I love you too, Susie!" once and then say something like --"Those are nice words! Thanks!" and then just smile and nod each time it continues after that.

You're still responding nicely and showing you care, but you aren't repeating yourself all day long!
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Brooksie 08:57 AM 10-01-2013
Originally Posted by preschoolteacher:
Awww... but I can see how it gets annoying. I'd say "I love you too, Susie!" once and then say something like --"Those are nice words! Thanks!" and then just smile and nod each time it continues after that.

You're still responding nicely and showing you care, but you aren't repeating yourself all day long!
Good idea.
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KBCsMommy 09:11 AM 10-01-2013
I have a dcg that does this too!! It's very sweet at first and then you find yourself saying "I love you too" through gritted teeth the 105th time

Sometimes I will tell them before they tell me and this works. I think they do it for attention and if you can get to them first they eventually stop.

I do the same thing for when they start calling my name randomly for no reason! I will call "Susie" and I won't say anything!! They get sick of it real quick and eventually stop.
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Brooksie 09:18 AM 10-01-2013
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
I have a dcg that does this too!! It's very sweet at first and then you find yourself saying "I love you too" through gritted teeth the 105th time

Sometimes I will tell them before they tell me and this works. I think they do it for attention and if you can get to them first they eventually stop.

I do the same thing for when they start calling my name randomly for no reason! I will call "Susie" and I won't say anything!! They get sick of it real quick and eventually stop.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds this annoying. lol
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Lianne 10:59 AM 10-01-2013
I'm mean, I admit it. Children are allowed to repeat themselves three times (I love you, calling my name, etc.) and then they're asked to stop and are redirected. Same with "why" type questions. They get to ask three questions about a certain subject before I'm done answering.
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melilley 11:30 AM 10-01-2013
Yes, I have one dcg who says that and gives my hand and arm kisses. She just started it so it doesn't bother me....yet
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Jack Sprat 11:36 AM 10-01-2013
I had a dcb over the summer that did this. Drove me INSANE!!! I loved it the first few weeks, but by our 3rd month together I was over it...

I have no advice. I would smile and tell him "ditto". Had to explain what that meant but, it was easier on me mentally for some reason.
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blandino 11:49 AM 10-01-2013
Originally Posted by Lianne:
I'm mean, I admit it. Children are allowed to repeat themselves three times (I love you, calling my name, etc.) and then they're asked to stop and are redirected. Same with "why" type questions. They get to ask three questions about a certain subject before I'm done answering.
You are much nicer than me. I allow once, maybe twice. But 3 times, you lose/don't get whatever it is you are asking for.
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DCMom 12:07 PM 10-01-2013
I actually have two of those, 3 and 5 year old sisters. I don't mind it. I just give one or the other a hug and don't say anything really.

I've had them their whole lives, but they just started doing it in the last year or so. They have some big changes in their lives...Mom and Dad are going through a messy divorce, mom has moved out, dad's house (the only home they have ever known) is for sale and the 5 year old just started Kindergarten. All in all they are doing pretty well, but every now and then they need a little extra.

Soooo, I'm thinking in my case, they just appreciate having one constant thing in their lives right now.
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daycare 01:15 PM 10-01-2013
I had this issue a few months back.....I never say I love you back, it makes my own child upset. He wants to know he is my number one, so this is why I only say it back to him and just thank yo to the others.

I do tell the kids thank you for the very kind words, that makes me feel good, now go play. Give a little hug and off they go.

If they keep saying it over and over, I try to lessen the attention that I give to it. Example one kid must say it 100 times a day. I will hug and give attention to about every 1 out of the 15 times he says it.

it is so very sweet and at first I felt bad for not validating their feelings, but realized that for some of the kids it just became something to say for a way to get attention......

On the bright side, they could be doing worse things to get my attention.....
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KBCsMommy 01:50 PM 10-01-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I had this issue a few months back.....I never say I love you back, it makes my own child upset. He wants to know he is my number one, so this is why I only say it back to him and just thank yo to the others.

I do tell the kids thank you for the very kind words, that makes me feel good, now go play. Give a little hug and off they go.

If they keep saying it over and over, I try to lessen the attention that I give to it. Example one kid must say it 100 times a day. I will hug and give attention to about every 1 out of the 15 times he says it.

it is so very sweet and at first I felt bad for not validating their feelings, but realized that for some of the kids it just became something to say for a way to get attention......

On the bright side, they could be doing worse things to get my attention.....

I like this too!
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Bookworm 05:37 PM 10-01-2013
I have 3 DCKs that do this. It took me about 2 mos to break this. When they got to the third I Love You, I would say, "You've said it three times and that makes it last all night. You don't have to say it anymore." After a while it worked. Maybe this will help.
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Angelsj 04:59 AM 10-02-2013
Originally Posted by Lianne:
I'm mean, I admit it. Children are allowed to repeat themselves three times (I love you, calling my name, etc.) and then they're asked to stop and are redirected. Same with "why" type questions. They get to ask three questions about a certain subject before I'm done answering.
LOL then I am mean too. I say, "I have answered you three times. I am done. Go play with friends now."
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Play Care 05:44 AM 10-02-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I had this issue a few months back.....I never say I love you back, it makes my own child upset. He wants to know he is my number one, so this is why I only say it back to him and just thank yo to the others.

I do tell the kids thank you for the very kind words, that makes me feel good, now go play. Give a little hug and off they go.

If they keep saying it over and over, I try to lessen the attention that I give to it. Example one kid must say it 100 times a day. I will hug and give attention to about every 1 out of the 15 times he says it.

it is so very sweet and at first I felt bad for not validating their feelings, but realized that for some of the kids it just became something to say for a way to get attention......

On the bright side, they could be doing worse things to get my attention.....
Great idea!
I find if kids are repeating themselves - no matter what is being said, it typically means they need to be directed to something specific to do. It *is* attention seeking. Just like "I'm bored" is code for "can we watch televison?" The constant "Miss K! Miss K! Miss K!" *Usually* means the current activity is nearing its natural conclusion. Obviously if I had a child in crisis who was saying I love you a lot and clearly needed reassurance that would be something else entirely.
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Maria2013 05:59 AM 10-02-2013
Originally Posted by Brooksie:
Does any one else have that one child that constantly says, "Miss ****? I love you." Super sweet at first, but now its all the time.. Like ALL THE TIME. Probably every 10-15 minutes. I always respond "I/we love you too ****" but its starting to annoy me. lol. I certainly don't want to make her feel that she's not loved here because she is, but anything repetitive is bound to get on your nerves. Any one else deal with this? Any suggestions for a helpful/supportive response?
I hear it a lot but fortunately I actually like it
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:56 AM 10-02-2013
Originally Posted by Bookworm:
I have 3 DCKs that do this. It took me about 2 mos to break this. When they got to the third I Love You, I would say, "You've said it three times and that makes it last all night. You don't have to say it anymore." After a while it worked. Maybe this will help.
Hmmm I will try that.

I giggled because as I was reading this thread this morning at 7AM my "I love you" child said it a couple of times. Great timing.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:56 AM 10-02-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I had this issue a few months back.....I never say I love you back, it makes my own child upset. He wants to know he is my number one, so this is why I only say it back to him and just thank yo to the others.

I do tell the kids thank you for the very kind words, that makes me feel good, now go play. Give a little hug and off they go.

If they keep saying it over and over, I try to lessen the attention that I give to it. Example one kid must say it 100 times a day. I will hug and give attention to about every 1 out of the 15 times he says it.

it is so very sweet and at first I felt bad for not validating their feelings, but realized that for some of the kids it just became something to say for a way to get attention......

On the bright side, they could be doing worse things to get my attention.....
I didn't think about that. That's a good idea.
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