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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Naughty Mat?
blueclouds29 04:28 AM 08-04-2011
Ok, i've come up with a idea to use a foam mat (the ones that attach to others and are different colors) as a naughty mat. BUT i don't like that name. What can I call it? Any ideas? Thanks!
pfund2233 05:15 AM 08-04-2011
Ours is "The Reflection Rug" cuz that's where we go to think about what we have done. 
Meyou 05:26 AM 08-04-2011
Ours is the Time Alone area where you think about what we've done and how we can get alone well with others.
mac60 05:28 AM 08-04-2011
I have used these before, but with a small blanket or towel. But really, why is everyone so scared to call it a naughty mat, which is exactly what it is. As if you are bad or misbehave you get put there.
blueclouds29 05:33 AM 08-04-2011
i don't mind calling it the 'naughty mat'. I agree, that's what you put there for, you were naughty. I can also move that mat with us, from inside to even outside. I'm excited to use it, cause we are having some issues with throwing and hitting. Thanks for your ideas!
mac60 05:54 AM 08-04-2011
Seriously, parents and providers need to quit sugar coating the whole discipline thing. Sugar coating is is exactly why these kids act the way they do, they literally get away with things.
This morning at drop off, I had a 25 mo old throwing a fit for his mom, he actually hit her 2 times on the back, hard, while she was holding him, she cracked him on the butt, he hit her again.....she cracked him again. Then sat him down on "time out"....ha ha. I am glad she finally acted on hihs horrible behavior....just she needed to lower the crack on the butt a few inches so he could really feel it, as cracking on the diaper has very little effect.
This morning at drop off, I had a 25 mo old throwing a fit for his mom, he actually hit her 2 times on the back, hard, while she was holding him, she cracked him on the butt, he hit her again.....she cracked him again. Then sat him down on "time out"....ha ha. I am glad she finally acted on hihs horrible behavior....just she needed to lower the crack on the butt a few inches so he could really feel it, as cracking on the diaper has very little effect.
Cat Herder 06:14 AM 08-04-2011
I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now. 
"Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly.
Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down".
It is all a vocabulary lesson...
"Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here.
Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated.
If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. 
Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.
I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
"Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly. Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down".
It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here. Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated.
If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
blueclouds29 06:16 AM 08-04-2011
Yes, i could tell the more upset i get the more DCB thinks its funny! He looks and me with the biggest smile ever and throws the toys.. Errrr... i'm trying so hard to calm down...
Cat Herder 06:21 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by blueclouds29:
Yes, i could tell the more upset i get the more DCB thinks its funny! He looks and me with the biggest smile ever and throws the toys.. Errrr... i'm trying so hard to calm down...
Get your poker face on, girl!!! Yes, i could tell the more upset i get the more DCB thinks its funny! He looks and me with the biggest smile ever and throws the toys.. Errrr... i'm trying so hard to calm down...
Country Kids 06:40 AM 08-04-2011
I call it Quiet time. Not trying to sugar coat it because it is used for more than discipline time. If a kid is just being whiny, crying, clingy, etc. they also get use the quiet time area. It doesn't take long for them to all realize that it really isn't a fun place to be so they start behaving pretty quickly.
3kidzmama 07:05 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now. "Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly.
Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down". It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here.
Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated. If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.
I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
This is exactly what my state does as well. We also aren't allowed to use the word "discipline". We are required to use the term "guidance" instead.I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now.
"Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly. Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down".
It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here. Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated.
If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
familyschoolcare 07:51 AM 08-04-2011
The thinking mat, it is where you go to think about what you did, and how you could have Handled the situation differently.
MG&Lsmom 10:35 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
I call it Quiet time. Not trying to sugar coat it because it is used for more than discipline time. If a kid is just being whiny, crying, clingy, etc. they also get use the quiet time area. It doesn't take long for them to all realize that it really isn't a fun place to be so they start behaving pretty quickly.
I have them take a "break". Only super serious offenses get called naughty. Like new DCG who got mad at me at lunch and dumped her milk all over the floor on purpose I call it Quiet time. Not trying to sugar coat it because it is used for more than discipline time. If a kid is just being whiny, crying, clingy, etc. they also get use the quiet time area. It doesn't take long for them to all realize that it really isn't a fun place to be so they start behaving pretty quickly.
thecrazyisout 10:39 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by 3kidzmama:
This is exactly what my state does as well. We also aren't allowed to use the word "discipline". We are required to use the term "guidance" instead.
Didn't it go from punishment --->Discipline ---> not Guidance...what is guidance going to turn into???This is exactly what my state does as well. We also aren't allowed to use the word "discipline". We are required to use the term "guidance" instead.
Cat Herder 10:46 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by thecrazyisout:
Didn't it go from punishment --->Discipline ---> not Guidance...what is guidance going to turn into???
Guidance---> Redirection---> Supporting their ExplorationDidn't it go from punishment --->Discipline ---> not Guidance...what is guidance going to turn into???
squareone 10:47 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now. "Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly.
Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down". It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here.
Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now.
"Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly. Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down".
It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here. Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
We are required to sugar coat discipline too. I think that technically, we can still use te term time-out but I don't anymore.
Blackcat31 10:48 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now. "Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly.
Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down". It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here.
Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated. If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.
I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
I just took a class that wasn't required for my Bachelor's in ECE, but I used it as an elective course. It was called Behavior Management in ECE Settings and the biggest thing they stressed was that every behavior has an antecedent and figuring out what that is will cure almost every bad behavior you see.I just finished close to 16 hours of "Discipline and Punishment in the Childcare Environment" training this week. I am required to "sugar coat" punishment, now.
"Ignore bad behaviors whenever possible"...yep, you heard it correctly. Mine get calmly "redirected" to the "soft seating area" to "calm down".
It is all a vocabulary lesson... "Time-Out" is a bad word and is not to be used at all with children under 3, here. Funny how it is exactly the same procedure as Time-out, but with softer terminology.
IMHO, The trick is to look bored with the procedure, not irritated or frustrated.
If they get a rise out of you, they win that round. Also, watch for the predictable patterns of escalation that lead to misbehavior. Stop it BEFORE it happens because it is so much calmer that way.I do rearrange the room often, have multiples of everything out and rotate toys to minimize problems that arise when kids are bored. I have done that for years and am glad to see that is in the current training. That actually works in real life.
I honestly think that is the trick to making things go smoothly. Anything else is just fluff. You have to be aware of what is causing or leading up to the behavior in order to stop, curb or cure it.
Cat Herder 11:01 AM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I just took a class that wasn't required for my Bachelor's in ECE, but I used it as an elective course. It was called Behavior Management in ECE Settings and the biggest thing they stressed was that every behavior has an antecedent and figuring out what that is will cure almost every bad behavior you see.
I honestly think that is the trick to making things go smoothly. Anything else is just fluff. You have to be aware of what is causing or leading up to the behavior in order to stop, curb or cure it.
Funny...I am signed up for that one tomorrow along with " Encouraging Parental Involvement" and "Rewarding Positive Behaviors". I just took a class that wasn't required for my Bachelor's in ECE, but I used it as an elective course. It was called Behavior Management in ECE Settings and the biggest thing they stressed was that every behavior has an antecedent and figuring out what that is will cure almost every bad behavior you see.
I honestly think that is the trick to making things go smoothly. Anything else is just fluff. You have to be aware of what is causing or leading up to the behavior in order to stop, curb or cure it.
I guess we are working up to "Let it be"......Come on sing it with me now....
"Good Morning, Let it Be Childcare.... Will it be your way or mine today?"
familyschoolcare 11:22 AM 08-04-2011
So A thought occurred to me why does the mat need a special name? Why not just call it the Blue mat or what ever color it is?
Mom_of_two 11:33 AM 08-04-2011
Yeah, mine is just 'The Corner' lol. 
blueclouds29 12:52 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
So A thought occurred to me why does the mat need a special name? Why not just call it the Blue mat or what ever color it is?
This is so true! Good thinking!So A thought occurred to me why does the mat need a special name? Why not just call it the Blue mat or what ever color it is?
countrymom 01:52 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Mom_of_two:
Yeah, mine is just 'The Corner' lol.
yup, thats what mine is called and you must stand in the corner with your nose in it. Yesterday I had a almost 3 yr old not want to share his playdoh so he threw himself on the floor and started kicking his feet and banging his hands, so I picked him up and told him we dont' do this in my house and marched his butt in the corner and when he was done screaming he can join us. I have a mat that is by the door and you can't leave it till I let you.Yeah, mine is just 'The Corner' lol.
nannyde 03:04 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I just took a class that wasn't required for my Bachelor's in ECE, but I used it as an elective course. It was called Behavior Management in ECE Settings and the biggest thing they stressed was that every behavior has an antecedent and figuring out what that is will cure almost every bad behavior you see.
I honestly think that is the trick to making things go smoothly. Anything else is just fluff. You have to be aware of what is causing or leading up to the behavior in order to stop, curb or cure it.
That's true. I call it pre-behavior.I just took a class that wasn't required for my Bachelor's in ECE, but I used it as an elective course. It was called Behavior Management in ECE Settings and the biggest thing they stressed was that every behavior has an antecedent and figuring out what that is will cure almost every bad behavior you see.
I honestly think that is the trick to making things go smoothly. Anything else is just fluff. You have to be aware of what is causing or leading up to the behavior in order to stop, curb or cure it.
The common issue is that even knowing what the behaviors are that lead to worse behavior....
you have to SEE it which means proximal visual supervision
AND
You have to correct it at THAT level which still means a NO.
Where providers have issues is that they are physically not in the same room with all the kids all the time during play and they aren't willing or don't see the value in doing the minor corrections.
Where it really gets muddled is when the provider has their own kids in the room. The prebehavior marker (antecedent) are normally things that are allowed with their own kids.
Things that are escalating behaviors like repeated setting off of toys, toys over the shoulder, running two handed behind cars, circling etc... are normally allowed at home with their own kids who free range the house and don't NEED/have the level of supervision day care kids need/have.
Unregistered 03:47 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Things that are escalating behaviors like repeated setting off of toys, toys over the shoulder, running two handed behind cars, circling etc... are normally allowed at home with their own kids who free range the house and don't NEED/have the level of supervision day care kids need/have.
What? I do not understand this at all?Things that are escalating behaviors like repeated setting off of toys, toys over the shoulder, running two handed behind cars, circling etc... are normally allowed at home with their own kids who free range the house and don't NEED/have the level of supervision day care kids need/have.
Sugar Magnolia 03:52 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by mac60:
Seriously, parents and providers need to quit sugar coating the whole discipline thing. Sugar coating is is exactly why these kids act the way they do, they literally get away with things.
This morning at drop off, I had a 25 mo old throwing a fit for his mom, he actually hit her 2 times on the back, hard, while she was holding him, she cracked him on the butt, he hit her again.....she cracked him again. Then sat him down on "time out"....ha ha. I am glad she finally acted on hihs horrible behavior....just she needed to lower the crack on the butt a few inches so he could really feel it, as cracking on the diaper has very little effect.
Mac, I'm sorry but I don't agree with this. Why would you let a parent "crack" this child while inside your daycare? I'm sure the kid is a discipline problem, and I'm sure mom is frustrated, but why let a parent strike a child in YOUR home? Don't you think his little brain will associate being in your time-out zone with a "cracking"? I had to tell a mom once she couldn't scream at her child while in my center, because we don't scream here. I would totally flip if I saw this mother actually hit the child in front of me. Sorry, don't take it personally, but I seriously would NOT allow this. Just my opinion. A crack on the diaper is hitting. Hand of parent on butt of child is hitting. I would have warned this mom to not do that as the "no hitting" rule applies to parents as well.Seriously, parents and providers need to quit sugar coating the whole discipline thing. Sugar coating is is exactly why these kids act the way they do, they literally get away with things.
This morning at drop off, I had a 25 mo old throwing a fit for his mom, he actually hit her 2 times on the back, hard, while she was holding him, she cracked him on the butt, he hit her again.....she cracked him again. Then sat him down on "time out"....ha ha. I am glad she finally acted on hihs horrible behavior....just she needed to lower the crack on the butt a few inches so he could really feel it, as cracking on the diaper has very little effect.
cheerfuldom 04:01 PM 08-04-2011
We have a chill-out chair. Just my thought but most of the time the crazy behavior (non-aggressive) is solved if the kiddo is separated for a moment and sort of re-starts back into the group. Now my middle daughter gets a "chill out room" because she is the tantrum thrower of the bunch but for the rest, the chair works. i dont have to use this too much though because preventative measures solve a lot of stuff.
Sugar Magnolia 05:45 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
We have a chill-out chair. Just my thought but most of the time the crazy behavior (non-aggressive) is solved if the kiddo is separated for a moment and sort of re-starts back into the group. Now my middle daughter gets a "chill out room" because she is the tantrum thrower of the bunch but for the rest, the chair works. i dont have to use this too much though because preventative measures solve a lot of stuff.
Great minds think alike Cheerful! We have the "quiet zone" where anyone can go anytime they need a break. The exact same area is called "the cooler" when a child is asked to visit it because they need to chill out. The exact same area is simply called "go sit down" if they get aggresive. But yes, ultimately, prevention is the best medicine! If I see/hear trouble brewing, I'll say "oh no I see/hear a sad/angry faces/voices. Come talk to me about it."We have a chill-out chair. Just my thought but most of the time the crazy behavior (non-aggressive) is solved if the kiddo is separated for a moment and sort of re-starts back into the group. Now my middle daughter gets a "chill out room" because she is the tantrum thrower of the bunch but for the rest, the chair works. i dont have to use this too much though because preventative measures solve a lot of stuff.
nannyde 07:19 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
What? I do not understand this at all?
https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/ther...com=71#respondWhat? I do not understand this at all?
sharlan 07:26 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by countrymom:
yup, thats what mine is called and you must stand in the corner with your nose in it. Yesterday I had a almost 3 yr old not want to share his playdoh so he threw himself on the floor and started kicking his feet and banging his hands, so I picked him up and told him we dont' do this in my house and marched his butt in the corner and when he was done screaming he can join us. I have a mat that is by the door and you can't leave it till I let you.
Not in CA.yup, thats what mine is called and you must stand in the corner with your nose in it. Yesterday I had a almost 3 yr old not want to share his playdoh so he threw himself on the floor and started kicking his feet and banging his hands, so I picked him up and told him we dont' do this in my house and marched his butt in the corner and when he was done screaming he can join us. I have a mat that is by the door and you can't leave it till I let you.
Having 2 boys, I have 2 chairs. When #2 (3) starts acting out, I tell him he needs to go sit in his "special chair". Somedays, he'll even tell me that he's going to go sit in his special chair to rest for awhile.
familyschoolcare 07:39 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by sharlan:
Not in CA.
What are you referring to? Please share.Not in CA.
sharlan 07:46 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
What are you referring to? Please share.
I was told that standing with their nose in the corner was a big no, no. Someone asked that at our licensing meeting.What are you referring to? Please share.
familyschoolcare 07:51 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by sharlan:
I was told that standing with their nose in the corner was a big no, no. Someone asked that at our licensing meeting.
Oh Thank You, I use a bench and I do not call it time out. I say you must sit on the bench until you can tell me what you did wrong, why it was wrong and what you could/should do differently next time. However, I specialize in School age and that would not be appropriate for a 2 year old. because, it requires higher thinking.I was told that standing with their nose in the corner was a big no, no. Someone asked that at our licensing meeting.
Cat Herder 08:18 PM 08-04-2011
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
Oh Thank You, I use a bench and I do not call it time out. I say you must sit on the bench until you can tell me what you did wrong, why it was wrong and what you could/should do differently next time. However, I specialize in School age and that would not be appropriate for a 2 year old. because, it requires higher thinking.
It gets confusing, doesn't it??? Oh Thank You, I use a bench and I do not call it time out. I say you must sit on the bench until you can tell me what you did wrong, why it was wrong and what you could/should do differently next time. However, I specialize in School age and that would not be appropriate for a 2 year old. because, it requires higher thinking.
Mine are all 2 and under and don't care what I call it...
My parents don't care what I call it....
Unfortunately the inspector does so I have to try to remember what the new "Buzz word" for "moving them away from who ever they are targeting until I can change to another activity" is....
We have 3-4 inspections a year.The vast majority of my stress comes from the CCR&R, not my kids or parents.
I don't think I can even tell you how many different "correct" methods I have been trained on since my first daycare job in the 80's.... It is hard to remember which is the most recent "correct" one some days...
Then again, I don't remember what I had for breakfast this morning after the day I had...
countrymom 05:45 AM 08-05-2011
they stand with their nose in the corner because a)if they saw the kids and what they were doing they would leave the corner b) I have kids who will play with anything that is in reach c)I have dck's give the child toys to play with in the corner. So this way when they do something bad they get to look at the wall. I use to use a chair till I had kids start picking my wall and my door. Sure I'm mean when its discipline time, but the amount of hitting these kids do (not in my house) when their parents come or drop off, the hitting of thier siblings, the throwing of toys is crazy, oh and the language is crazy. I had a 6 yr old tell me off 2 weeks ago, apparently he does it at home and thinks its ok to talk to adults like this, so when I asked his parents they said that they take his game boy away, so how is this fixing the problem. Kids need to know boundries, its like we mold them into decent children and adults and by allowing "sugar coated discipline" how are we teaching them, teaching them that if you hit someone that there is a consequences, not redirecting them. Can you imagine them at a job, they didn't like their employee so they hit them, heck its happening at schools. My sil who works for cas always said (before she had kids) that you need to talk to them and reason with them (who reasons with a 2 yr old) I wish you guys see her now, dh always asks her how her reasoning is working, her 4 yr old hits her all the time, the way she talks to her parents and family memebers is mouth dropping and them throwing on the floor is crazy along with her screaming.
sharlan 07:40 AM 08-05-2011
Originally Posted by countrymom:
they stand with their nose in the corner because a)if they saw the kids and what they were doing they would leave the corner b) I have kids who will play with anything that is in reach c)I have dck's give the child toys to play with in the corner. So this way when they do something bad they get to look at the wall. I use to use a chair till I had kids start picking my wall and my door. Sure I'm mean when its discipline time, but the amount of hitting these kids do (not in my house) when their parents come or drop off, the hitting of thier siblings, the throwing of toys is crazy, oh and the language is crazy. I had a 6 yr old tell me off 2 weeks ago, apparently he does it at home and thinks its ok to talk to adults like this, so when I asked his parents they said that they take his game boy away, so how is this fixing the problem. Kids need to know boundries, its like we mold them into decent children and adults and by allowing "sugar coated discipline" how are we teaching them, teaching them that if you hit someone that there is a consequences, not redirecting them. Can you imagine them at a job, they didn't like their employee so they hit them, heck its happening at schools. My sil who works for cas always said (before she had kids) that you need to talk to them and reason with them (who reasons with a 2 yr old) I wish you guys see her now, dh always asks her how her reasoning is working, her 4 yr old hits her all the time, the way she talks to her parents and family memebers is mouth dropping and them throwing on the floor is crazy along with her screaming.
I'm not disagreeing with your method, just saying that it's not allowed here. I did that with my kids. I laughed at a gf 32 yrs ago when she started the time out chair with 1 minute per year of age. Yes, that was long before Super Nanny.they stand with their nose in the corner because a)if they saw the kids and what they were doing they would leave the corner b) I have kids who will play with anything that is in reach c)I have dck's give the child toys to play with in the corner. So this way when they do something bad they get to look at the wall. I use to use a chair till I had kids start picking my wall and my door. Sure I'm mean when its discipline time, but the amount of hitting these kids do (not in my house) when their parents come or drop off, the hitting of thier siblings, the throwing of toys is crazy, oh and the language is crazy. I had a 6 yr old tell me off 2 weeks ago, apparently he does it at home and thinks its ok to talk to adults like this, so when I asked his parents they said that they take his game boy away, so how is this fixing the problem. Kids need to know boundries, its like we mold them into decent children and adults and by allowing "sugar coated discipline" how are we teaching them, teaching them that if you hit someone that there is a consequences, not redirecting them. Can you imagine them at a job, they didn't like their employee so they hit them, heck its happening at schools. My sil who works for cas always said (before she had kids) that you need to talk to them and reason with them (who reasons with a 2 yr old) I wish you guys see her now, dh always asks her how her reasoning is working, her 4 yr old hits her all the time, the way she talks to her parents and family memebers is mouth dropping and them throwing on the floor is crazy along with her screaming.