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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Only 3 Weeks Left...
MrsB 01:33 PM 06-26-2012
Well, I only have 3 weeks left of daycare before me and the family are on the road! This last month has been the most hellish month of ALL my years doing daycare. We are a military family and I have done this move/daycare care thing a few times and this by far has been the hardest with the daycare families. I have really great families that follow the rules for the most part, they always give me praise, their kids are will behaved and I just love them all to pieces.

I was having such a hard time with this and choosing the right time to tell my daycare parents. I settled on giving them 6 weeks notice. I told everyone in person and then the next day gave everyone written notice. I explained that if you find something sooner than July 13th, I completely understand but 2 weeks notice is required. I also am giving anyone that stays until the 13th half off the last week. THEN CHAOS ENSUES...

1. I get notice from 3 kids the next day.

2. DCM calls and says they aren't suppling any more diapers at daycare because new preschool wont take her until she's potty trained. Mom was basically making it my problem that she wasn't potty trained yet. So I gave mom her problem back and said she is potty trained here and if she isn't for you, then it is something your doing, not me. The next week same mom texted me at 4:15 (PU time is 4:30) and said she decided to run errands and won't be there until 5:30. So I texted back my overtime rate and gave her what the overtime fee would be. Mom brought the overtime fee and notice.

3. DCF (has 3 kids that I watch) waits till Sunday of this week (has had notice for 3+ weeks now) and says they found care for one DCG but they had to start paying right away so can they not have to pay or give 2 weeks notice. I say no, still have to give 2 weeks. Then she says okay well the 2 other DCBs wont be here mon-wed this week so can they use vacation rate. I say no vacation rate requires 2 week notice. So then Monday DCM gives me 2 week notice for the one DCG. Then in the evening texts me, Can we get any discounts or use any leave for her last 2 weeks. I said no, vacation rate requires two week notice and you can't use vacation for last 2 weeks per contract. So then she goes on but you are giving her other 2 sons, 50% off last week. So I explain, only kids who stay until July 13th get 50%. She doesnt get it. So I say well if you would like to have a conference where we can sit down and I can re explain my contract I'd be happy to. Uggggh

4. Next DCB - Mom and Dad don't work on Fridays. Mom and dad told me that they will pay full time rate but that they would almost always keep dcb home for family time. So then week after I give notice I found out from another Provider friend this DCB started and goes there on fridays. I dont really care because I am getting my money still for FT rate and I am sure they probably want to keep their foot in the door and try it out for when I leave. Then DCB starts getting sick. Over the last 7 weeks, he has had strep 2 times, a pretty much non stop cold, fevers, pink eye and hand foot and mouth. She calls me up Monday and says he has a fever (and is on antibiotics since last Thursday for strep) and that I really need to get a handle on this because I am draining her sick leave! I was like wait a minute. NOBODY here has been sick except for him. She said oh that seems hard to believe. I said I'll show you my sign in/out sheets. No one has been sick! She said well dr said someone is re-infecting him. I said well did you think that maybe it is the other daycare he goes to. She was so upset that I knew about that. I said I dont care about the other daycare, but you need to realize you are subjecting him to 2 sets of germs. He has been here for 2 years and has only missed a handful of days until he started the other daycare. He has built up immunities to the germs at this house. He hasn't at the other daycare. So she changes subject and says okay well he wont be there today, but if he is feeling better today she will bring him tomorrow. So this morning, she calls and says she gave him tylenol for his fever last night before bed and he slept well all night and seems fine this morning, will bring him in about an hour. I said no 24 hours after no fever with no tylenol. She gets all mad and says she only has a few weeks left and I have low enrollment, why am I making this so difficult for her. I said, I am just following my contract, just because I am leaving doesnt mean the rules are out the window. We are moving soon and the last thing I need is my kids sick! So then 2 hours ago she stops by and brings termination notice with 2 weeks worth of pay and asks for his stuff. I started crying and she asked if they were guilty tears? I said no, I really care for all my daycare kids and seeing him go makes me sad. I also said, I had grown really fond of all my daycare families and thought we had developed a close bond and mutual respect, but that maybe it was more one sided than I thought.

Uggggggh, I know this post is painfully long, but has anyone moving or closing had the same experience. Its almost like they take it as a personal attack that my husband got military orders to another state. I pour my heart and soul into these kids and feel like I am getting stepped on and treated like trash. It is just so weird because I have a very strong backbone and generally don't have any issues. Thanks for listening
cheerfuldom 01:56 PM 06-26-2012
I'm sorry but actually, not surprised. Most people are very nice and reasonable with a provider that they like and one that keeps them in line. Now, they do not have those same motivations and some true colors are showing. Its the same thing that most of us have encountered when a family gets termed or even when they give notice....they just give up any type of pretense of manners and let it all hang out. No matter how you say it, people are going to be upset when you now longer provide the service they want from you. I would have to say that your relationships have clearly been one-sided and business relationships only. They are all looking out for number #1 now and do not have any motivation to follow your rules or keep a decent relationship going because you are leaving soon, no matter if they treat you well or not. I'm not saying this is okay but just that it is unfortunately doesnt mean you have done anything wrong.

I think you are doing the right thing in standing firm on your policies, but that does not make any of this easier as you see parents pulling kids out, lying, trying to break the rules. Its very heartbreaking. Especially that moms rude comment when you started crying.

Just hang in there and stay strong. They should be more supportive and hopefully the last few weeks will be better for you.
spud912 02:24 PM 06-26-2012
I am so sorry you are going through this! I don't have any advice, but wanted to say you are doing the right thing with sticking up for yourself. Just because you are leaving doesn't mean the rules are out the window!

grandmom 02:24 PM 06-26-2012
Who we are comes out when we are stressed. They are who they are. They are putting their family first by asking for all these exceptions.

Keep your rules. Don't budge. Keep your family first.
wahmof3 02:58 PM 06-26-2012
So sorry you are having these issues!!

I strongly believe that you are seeing their "true" colors. As long as the water is calm everything runs smoothly but as soon as you don't "play" their way then all sorts of issues can arise. Its sad.

I had this happen to me, once the DCP didn't get their way- no matter how I explained that the bottom line was "RESPECT" they termed on the spot. Boy oh boy did it cost them

Just stay strong!! Continue to follow your contract, you are doing the right thing.

DCBlessings27 05:06 PM 06-26-2012
I think you're doing the right thing in sticking to your contract. Sorry that those parents are showing their true colors.

My sil closed her daycare. All but 1 family was fine with the situation and immediately found other care. The other family was very upset. Apparently dcm cried all night after finding out the news. Dcd has been friends with my bil for years. He didn't speak to him for like a week bc he was mad. They pulled the dcb as soon as they found alternate care.
cheerfuldom 05:13 PM 06-26-2012
Originally Posted by katieica:
I think you're doing the right thing in sticking to your contract. Sorry that those parents are showing their true colors.

My sil closed her daycare. All but 1 family was fine with the situation and immediately found other care. The other family was very upset. Apparently dcm cried all night after finding out the news. Dcd has been friends with my bil for years. He didn't speak to him for like a week bc he was mad. They pulled the dcb as soon as they found alternate care.
Thats sad. Parents get so involved in their own lives and just cant contemplate any one else having to make tough choices or make changes for their family. Its not like SIL termed them....she closed her whole daycare! Everyone had to find someone else. oy.

I interviewed a mom last week that was really upset to be looking for childcare for her 10 month old. She said the provider promised to watch her daughter for 2 years and then, had a life change and will be moving (about 6 or 8 months into the arrangement). The provider gave several months for the parents to find new daycare and is staying in town just for them. Thats still not enough. The parents want the full two years care no matter what is going on with her. Talk about selfish.
Crazy8 05:20 PM 06-26-2012
that really sucks!!! I agree they are all showing their true colors now. Still sad though. Will have to keep this in mind when/if I decide to close. You could have left them high and dry with 2 weeks notice, you didn't and this is what you get for it. People really suck sometimes.
MrsB 06:39 AM 06-27-2012
Thanks everyone for your words of encouragement!

Just this morning I had a mom (the one with the 3 kids) say to me. "Sorry I've kind of been all over the place, but I've just really been stressed about this wedding come up" (uhh the wedding is over a hear from now, next september) I really wanted to say, "Really!! I am moving a family of 6, 2 cats, and a dog 2k miles in 3 weeks and I will be out of work for at least 2 months and your talking about stress over something happening in over a year!!"

Really it was just a solidification of the the fact that is why I am so good at my job and none of my DCP could hack it. I am able to show empathy and put myself in others shoes. So be it! I am just looking forward to the fun cross country trip my family is taking and then getting to see all my family that I haven't seen in 2 years!
Meeko 08:19 AM 06-27-2012
S sorry you are having to put up with their temper tantrums! It's THEIR problem, not yours. Stick your guns and follow your contract until you shut the door on the last one.

I did day care on a military base. When my husband decided to take an early out offer after Desert Storm, we gave our day care parents plenty of notice and let them know we were going home to Utah, with a great job offer for my husband.

We had six families.

Five were happy for us as we started a new chapter in our lives. I am still in contact with them all over 20 years later. Their children are now adults and keep in contact too.

But one family acted like we made the decision to move JUST to make life difficult for them. They were rude, difficult and found ways to make life as awkward as possible for me. They really took it personally. I'm not sure why because we were all military and moves happen!!!

I guess it takes all types.

Good luck on your new adventure!
Tags:closing daycare, leaving daycare job, parents - don't cooperate
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