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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Termed Infant After 4 Hours....
EchoMom 10:34 AM 11-06-2013
So, I had to tell a parent we wouldn't be able to provide the care her newborn needs. We had the infant scheduled for a half day today, as a first day before mom goes back to work on Monday.

The baby screamed and screamed and screamed. It was like it was in horrible pain/distress. Baby did nap and take a bottle but only after screaming and screaming and screaming. It was miserable for my assistant and I, it was miserable for the other children and babies...

DCM said baby is almost always like that and they don't know what to do either. Baby has been on Zantac since a month old, went to the chiropractor, suspects dairy allergy...

I have and have had other tiny babies before and have seen angelic babies as well as more difficult, refluxy babies. But this was unbelievable. So loud... There's no way we could have a positive environment for ourselves and the kids with that going on, let alone if other parents heard that!

Plus, I feel terrible for the baby. Miserable, absolutely miserable like in total agony with no relief. That baby needs way more help than we can provide in small group care.



What do daycare CENTERS do with chronic screamers? Do they term? Or do centers keep everyone who pays?

I feel terrible, never had to term someone immediately, but the alternative doesn't look promising. The DCM is at a total loss as well and deals with the same screaming at home.


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Brooksie 10:40 AM 11-06-2013
Oh my Poor thing. Sounds like what I went through with dd. She was on meds for reflux and it wasnt until she was 5-6 months that we were finally referred to a specialist and found out she was allergic to dairy AND soy. I stopped breast feeding and we put her on a special formula and we had a new baby in like 2 days. She started growing, stopped screaming constantly, stopped projectile vomiting and started sleeping. I think there is something going on medically that needs to be addressed.
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melilley 10:41 AM 11-06-2013
I have, well had a screamer (he's still here, but doesn't scream/cry anymore) and regret not terming to this day. I was miserable for about 7 months. Never again!

And I have worked in centers and yes, most do keep babies no matter what, especially corporate centers. It's sad, but in my experience, most corporate centers will keep any child and it takes a lot to get them termed! It's all about money.
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cheerfuldom 11:46 AM 11-06-2013
You did the right thing. A child that needs so much attention should have mom or a nanny. It is the parent's responsibility to find appropriate care. I termed one child after two hours, it was that bad. only in my case the baby was older so just big enough to scream bloody murder, crawl after other kids and scratch and cling to them. i later found out that the baby had been kicked out of multiple daycares and the mom stayed home with the child and that is what was needed.
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MCC 12:49 PM 11-06-2013
I'm so sorry you had to term so early, but I'm glad you went with your gut.

I have a screamer right now, and I am really struggling with what to do. They paid to hold the spot for about 8 weeks before she started. She's been here a month, and so far there have only been 3 days where she didn't scream. I had to send her home at 12 today, b/c we just could not handle it anymore, and the baby needed it eat, but wouldn't.

I am a total advocate for no soy no dairy in any fussy babies. Like PP, my own DD was awful from 3-9 weeks. She projectile vomited, screamed, had lose muscusy stools. My lactation consultant told me to stop eating soy and dairy, and we had a new baby in 3 days. She started gaining weight, sleeping, it was amazing!
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TwinKristi 01:00 PM 11-06-2013
Does anyone utilize baby carriers? I've never had a screamer to the point of not being able to keep them but I'm still new at this. I had a baby who was 12mo who would occasionally get really upset and cry for what seemed like hours and made everyone miserable when he did. Sometimes I would put him in the carrier and it helped to get the kids transitioning from one activity to another without him upsetting everyone.
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MCC 01:07 PM 11-06-2013
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
Does anyone utilize baby carriers? I've never had a screamer to the point of not being able to keep them but I'm still new at this. I had a baby who was 12mo who would occasionally get really upset and cry for what seemed like hours and made everyone miserable when he did. Sometimes I would put him in the carrier and it helped to get the kids transitioning from one activity to another without him upsetting everyone.
The baby I have currently will not stop crying for anything. In my opinion, if a bottle, a nap, a burp, or a cuddle wont fix the problem, that baby is inconsolable. If this continues for multiple days with no improvement, it becomes a problem for my parents, my other kids, and most importantly for me! This baby is just plain uncomfortable, she's 3mo.

I do have a carrier, but I find it very awkward to use while trying to do things with the older kids.
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KidGrind 11:49 AM 11-10-2013
Originally Posted by EchoMom:
So, I had to tell a parent we wouldn't be able to provide the care her newborn needs. We had the infant scheduled for a half day today, as a first day before mom goes back to work on Monday.

The baby screamed and screamed and screamed. It was like it was in horrible pain/distress. Baby did nap and take a bottle but only after screaming and screaming and screaming. It was miserable for my assistant and I, it was miserable for the other children and babies...

DCM said baby is almost always like that and they don't know what to do either. Baby has been on Zantac since a month old, went to the chiropractor, suspects dairy allergy...

I have and have had other tiny babies before and have seen angelic babies as well as more difficult, refluxy babies. But this was unbelievable. So loud... There's no way we could have a positive environment for ourselves and the kids with that going on, let alone if other parents heard that!

Plus, I feel terrible for the baby. Miserable, absolutely miserable like in total agony with no relief. That baby needs way more help than we can provide in small group care.



What do daycare CENTERS do with chronic screamers? Do they term? Or do centers keep everyone who pays?

I feel terrible, never had to term someone immediately, but the alternative doesn't look promising. The DCM is at a total loss as well and deals with the same screaming at home.


I have an hourly baby who is level 10 screamer. DCB is unconsolable. My husband begs for me to send him on errands.

I charge the parents $75 per visit. I am thinking about terming. The baby has an appointment coming up shortly. I am hoping the doctor figures it out or sends them to a specialist.

I feel bad for the DCB. I can tell DCB is absolutely miserable.
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Lil'DinoEggs 12:42 PM 11-10-2013
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
Does anyone utilize baby carriers? I've never had a screamer to the point of not being able to keep them but I'm still new at this. I had a baby who was 12mo who would occasionally get really upset and cry for what seemed like hours and made everyone miserable when he did. Sometimes I would put him in the carrier and it helped to get the kids transitioning from one activity to another without him upsetting everyone.
I am working with my first infant and I use a carrier. I told mom that I like to use them. I used them a lot with my first two children. However, I have come to regret this because since the baby started teething, she will only go down for a nap if she is nursed-down or worn-down. I finally can rock her to sleep but I can't put her down. I am so mad because when she was three months, I got her to go to sleep on her own! Mom said I was the only person that could do that. But now, nothing. Plus she is tiny but strong and at six months she will pull herself up and hang out to one side which makes it difficult and uncomfortable.

In the future, I would only use the carrier for drop ins or part times as it does calm fussy babies. But I wouldn't let a full time baby get used to it. If a full time baby is a screamer, it may not be appropriate for full time care.
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Blackcat31 12:55 PM 11-10-2013
Originally Posted by Lil'DinoEggs:
I am working with my first infant and I use a carrier. I told mom that I like to use them. I used them a lot with my first two children. However, I have come to regret this because since the baby started teething, she will only go down for a nap if she is nursed-down or worn-down. I finally can rock her to sleep but I can't put her down. I am so mad because when she was three months, I got her to go to sleep on her own! Mom said I was the only person that could do that. But now, nothing. Plus she is tiny but strong and at six months she will pull herself up and hang out to one side which makes it difficult and uncomfortable.

In the future, I would only use the carrier for drop ins or part times as it does calm fussy babies. But I wouldn't let a full time baby get used to it. If a full time baby is a screamer, it may not be appropriate for full time care.
THIS^^^^ is exactly why I refuse to use any type of infant equipment.

The baby becomes dependent on it.

I am all for wearing babies IF you don't have other kids you are caring for.

It makes it difficult and regardless of whether it actually helps the baby or not, licensing here will NOT allow an infant to sleep in any sort of carrier, wrap and/or sling.

Plus most the info I have read about wearing babies in slings and wraps say not to start until atleast 3 months old....which in my opinion is the perfect age to begin proper sleep training.

I've had my share of screamer babies over the years and I will NEVER do it again. EVER. Not just to protect my sanity but to protect the sanity of the other kids in care too.
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countrymom 06:51 PM 11-10-2013
sounds like the baby is coliky or maybe gassy. I would have suggested gripe water for baby.
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Cradle2crayons 07:49 PM 11-10-2013
Originally Posted by countrymom:
sounds like the baby is coliky or maybe gassy. I would have suggested gripe water for baby.
Gripe water

The.best.stuff.ever.
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MCC 07:48 AM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
Gripe water

The.best.stuff.ever.
I hear people talking about this stuff all the time. I have had horrible experience with gripe water every time we tried it with DD. It did nothing to calm her down, and it kept her up way longer than normal. Maybe it's b/c she had an actual allergy?

I'm glad it works for other providers. Normally when a parent tells me to use it I cringe.
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Cradle2crayons 07:52 AM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by MCC:
I hear people talking about this stuff all the time. I have had horrible experience with gripe water every time we tried it with DD. It did nothing to calm her down, and it kept her up way longer than normal. Maybe it's b/c she had an actual allergy?

I'm glad it works for other providers. Normally when a parent tells me to use it I cringe.
It's very possible. It has multiple ingredients in it so any of them could have been an issue. I've never had a kid react badly to it, but there's always that one lol.
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permanentvacation 08:27 AM 11-11-2013
The center that I worked at for almost a year would NEVER terminate a child. No matter how horrible of a day the child had! They simply cared about keeping the money coming in rather than caring about the child having a good day and the daycare center being a good fit for the child. Which is part of why I quit working there. I would rather the child be happy and the daycare be a good fit for the child than continue allowing the child to be miserable just to keep the money coming in!

What they did with babies that cried constantly was hand the baby from one adult to the other all day long. The baby would be with the infant teacher, then the assistant director, then the cook, then the 4 year old teacher, just handed off to every adult in the building. But made sure to have the baby in the infant room that he/she belonged in by the time the parents arrived to pick the child up so they never knew that was going on. They would NEVER tell the parents that the child was upset or that they passed him/her around all day.

They did the same thing with children of all ages. Whether the child was simply upset, didn't get along with other kids, had personal conflicts with their teacher, or whatever the reason.

The thing is that they had many adults and rooms to flip the child to all day long so no one teacher had to work with the child all day.
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Tags:infant - first day, terminate - screaming
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