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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>If DCP's Ask Why I Termed Child- Is It Ok To Tell Them?
SunshineMama 11:22 AM 05-17-2012
So I did it- I just termed the family who kept bringing their sick child all the time- they have 2 weeks notice. I feel a huge relief already.

I have a small group, and the other parents are going to be asking "Where's DCB?"

What do I say?

If they ask, is it appropriate to say that I had to let him go because they were not following the sick guidelines? I want to let the other families know I mean business when it comes to illness, and I don't want them to think that dcb's family termed me.

How do you usually handle it when you term a child and the other parents want to know what happened?
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sharlan 11:26 AM 05-17-2012
I wouldn't go into details, just give a simple explanantion.

Something like, I felt Johnny would be happier in another daycare.
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Willow 11:34 AM 05-17-2012
Agree with sharlan.

The last thing I'd want my parents worrying about is if I shared similar private information about our business or personal relationship with others.

Just wouldn't look very professional and might actually end up coming across the wrong way.



On another note, I'm glad you are relieved and it'll all be over soon

Dealing with a kid who is sick like that all the time is the pits.
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Blackcat31 11:35 AM 05-17-2012
If parents ask I would simply say that the family has made other child care arrangements. If they push for more info, I would say that I do not discuss other families and if they still want to know, I would say "well, you will have ot find them then and ask them about it."

I fully understand you wanting other parents to know you mean business but trust me, if you stick to your policies and rules without fail, they will know you mean business without having to use someone else as an example.

If you stay in this business, kids will come and go and you will always have someone wanting to know X about someone else. Just smile and say as little as possible and reiterate that you do not discuss one client with another.

BTW~ Good for you for standing your ground with the family you termed. Just remember to remain professional at all times if they do want to call and discuss it further.
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SunshineMama 11:46 AM 05-17-2012
Thanks! It's tempting to feel like I have to proactively defend myself but I do always want to remain professional I will keep things neutral and professional.
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Heidi 11:49 AM 05-17-2012
of course, if the day after they leave, you just happen to put out a reminder memo to all the parents regarding your sick policy.....

where is the smiley with the horns?????
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MarinaVanessa 11:53 AM 05-17-2012
Originally Posted by sharlan:
I wouldn't go into details, just give a simple explanantion.

Something like, I felt Johnny would be happier in another daycare.
Sharlan's explination is perfect and right on point. Another variation would be something like I felt that Johny's family would be happier with another daycare. Very similar to Sharlan's but you're putting more emphasis on the parents rather the kids. The parent's can get a better idea that the issue was with the parents and not the child KWIM? I like that Sharlan used "I felt" because it shows that you made the initiative instead of the other way around.

I wouldn't go into detail about the "why" of it all ... it could cause some problems with privacy etc. Plus they really don't need to know but they'll get the idea. Hopefully they'll "get it" and be relieved that "sicky boy" is gone.
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SunshineMama 12:55 PM 05-17-2012
I just got "de-friended" by dcd on facebook. I wonder if they will bring him next week. I have a policy where they still have to pay 2 weeks notice even if they dont use my service.

I wonder if they are going to make me have to sue them in small claims court?



Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
Sharlan's explination is perfect and right on point. Another variation would be something like I felt that Johny's family would be happier with another daycare. Very similar to Sharlan's but you're putting more emphasis on the parents rather the kids. The parent's can get a better idea that the issue was with the parents and not the child KWIM? I like that Sharlan used "I felt" because it shows that you made the initiative instead of the other way around.

I wouldn't go into detail about the "why" of it all ... it could cause some problems with privacy etc. Plus they really don't need to know but they'll get the idea. Hopefully they'll "get it" and be relieved that "sicky boy" is gone.

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littlemissmuffet 05:41 PM 05-17-2012
The last termination I did a few months ago I did tell the other parents that it was the result of not continually not following my rules (true). I said it because all my parents were slacking off during that period - and what do you know, everyone's been just totally on the ball since
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Mary Poppins 06:07 PM 05-17-2012
Originally Posted by Heidi:
of course, if the day after they leave, you just happen to put out a reminder memo to all the parents regarding your sick policy.....

where is the smiley with the horns?????


I actually did this using my newsletter to let my other dcf's know I instituted a strict zero tolerance for violent behavior. It just happened to be the week after my last hitter/kicker/biter was sent off to a place that would tolerate that sort of stuff.
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AnneCordelia 03:44 AM 05-18-2012
I think that most of the time it's best to keep this info to yourself, "Their situation has changed so they moved on." will suffice.

However, I think there is a time and a place to say these things. I had a particularly horrible family that I termed in the early new year. THey were aweful. Paid late, complained about late fees, picked up late, attitude, etc. When my other two families asked where they were I simply said, "Well, not every family is as wonderful as you are when it comes to paying on time and being polite."

I didnt' divulge details but they now know that I stick to my policies.
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wdmmom 07:50 AM 05-18-2012
I have 2 rooms I do daycare in. 1 on the main floor, 1 on the lower level. Most dcp's have no idea who is here on any particular day. If anyone asks if another kid is here, i tell the kid, i don't know, lets go see. That's the parents que to go. I don't talk parents to parents or kids to parents. People need to realize that this business isn't any of their business!!
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My3cents 09:35 AM 05-18-2012
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I have 2 rooms I do daycare in. 1 on the main floor, 1 on the lower level. Most dcp's have no idea who is here on any particular day. If anyone asks if another kid is here, i tell the kid, i don't know, lets go see. That's the parents que to go. I don't talk parents to parents or kids to parents. People need to realize that this business isn't any of their business!!
I don't know if I agree with this. I think parent's want to know who their child is playing with during the day, because at night they talk about it- or want to have something to talk about with the kids. I feel parent's can know who is there during the day- what does that matter. I think some things are the parent's business. There child is coming to my daycare. I don't feel personal stuff is there business. $ issues or my personal life is their business.

I guess I have the attitude of their business is what keeps me in business-
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wdmmom 10:14 AM 05-18-2012
I go over this type of thing at the interview. I don't divulge information at the door. Its impersonal and unprofessional. If a parent makes the comment, "I haven't seen little Johnny's dad pick him up lately. We used to run to each other all the time." I simply say, "Oh Jim, you know schedules change, people move, change jobs, etc. Its life."

When a parent chooses me, I want them to choose ME and my home, not who their child's playmates may or may not be. If a parent chooses wants to bring their child here base on who I have in attendance, its not going to be a good fit.

If you come because I have another girl that is 2, what happens when that girl leaves?! Kwim?!

I keep everyone's information private and I've only been asked by one parent and I said, "A new opportunity presented itself to the family." Plain and simple.

I don't want people talking about me, I don't talk about them.
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skittles 10:35 AM 05-18-2012
I recently termed a family who kept bringing there sick child to care as well. I did not tell any of the parents. The kids told their parents "jonny" is not at daycare ect.. So weeks later parents asked if jonny was still attending. I just said "no" he found a new daycare. When they asked why I just said they did not work out.
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karen 11:16 AM 05-18-2012
This time I did tell my parents about terming my behavior child the one who was violent and being abusive towards the other children. I wanted them to know that I have a zero tolerence policy for violent children at my house.
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