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  #1  
Old 10-09-2016, 01:45 PM
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Default Do You Notify Current Families When Terminating?

I am possibly going to be terminating a family that has only been with me a few months. I will be doing it as soon as I can enroll another family.
Their youngest child of this family is so horribly behaved, it is completely draining me and is causing issues with the other kids. Some of it is age appropriate, but he spends half the day screaming and the other half being aggressive with the other kids, interrupting their play, throwing toys at them etc. He also physically fights me on every diaper change, screams during every meal, screams every time I sit down etc.
My question is this: I feel like I need to tell my other families, as I don't want them to think people are just leaving my daycare left and right. I have termed three newish families in the past year due to behavior and disrespect by the parents. Do you tell your existing families when you have a change in enrollment and do you tell them why? I know they will see the new faces and wonder what happened to the other kids. Advice please.
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Old 10-09-2016, 02:50 PM
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I personally think you dont have too. Working at a daycare we know that kids come and go and alot of parents know that as well. Dont stress yourself and over think.I dont know how many kids are in your care, but in my daycare center we have around 70 kids and i had never had to tell people why we had to kicked some of the kids out of our program
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Old 10-09-2016, 03:11 PM
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I don't.

I went through a similar period with a few families leaving and no one even commented on it. I don't even know if they noticed. I have only ever had one family ever mention something about a family that had left and I just told them that the particular family was no longer with me anymore. Left it at that.

I don't think that you owe them an explanation. I think if they know the other family and child, and have seen them in action, then they can probably guess why they are no longer with you.
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Old 10-09-2016, 03:34 PM
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I wouldn't, I think it crosses a confidentiality line. When parents ask, I always just stay as vague as possible ("not a good fit", "didn't work out", "time to move on", etc.)

On top of which, you never know who knows who. I would hate for a former family to hear I was talking about them.
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Old 10-09-2016, 04:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JackandJill View Post
I wouldn't, I think it crosses a confidentiality line. When parents ask, I always just stay as vague as possible ("not a good fit", "didn't work out", "time to move on", etc.)

On top of which, you never know who knows who. I would hate for a former family to hear I was talking about them.
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Old 10-10-2016, 07:13 AM
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My clients always ask "where is so and so" and I fit my reply to the reason I termed. They thought they were getting nanny care? "Unfortunately x is no longer attending. The needs of the group outweigh the needs of one family". I try to make it as vague as possible and most of the time they don't ask any other questions. If someone leaves on good terms I ask if I can share that they're leaving "x is moving a few hours away" because I do have a lot of clients get promotions or new jobs requiring that they move and I don't want people thinking I have clients jumping ship left and right. It was hard recently because I had 2 clients move and termed 2 new clients. The ones that were moving let me share that fact or shared it themselves. One client was termed due to the infant being held at home and crying all day here. Parents knew the child cried a lot because they witnessed it so I primed them for the term saying "this is why I have a two week trial period". It's rare I term and has happened more the last year than in the previous 15. I wouldn't worry about it so much if I didn't have such a mobile clientele. The average client is only here a couple of years but 99% are leaving because of a move or child starting school. I feel like if I didn't say anything other parents would see everyone leaving and start to think they were missing something about the care I provide and it could hurt my business.
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Old 10-10-2016, 07:38 AM
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If someone asks me "what happened to dck?", whether it's someone that left or termed, I just reply:
"Sometimes things just don't work out".

Nobody needs specifics. So if it's questioned again, I just say it's confidential.
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Old 10-10-2016, 07:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Snowmom View Post
If someone asks me "what happened to dck?", whether it's someone that left or termed, I just reply:
"Sometimes things just don't work out".

Nobody needs specifics. So if it's questioned again, I just say it's confidential.
Yep! Sometimes things just don't work out.
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Old 10-10-2016, 08:06 AM
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I don't mention it.

I have a small group, so everyone notices when someone new is here or leaves. I've had the "where are so and so" questions and I always say "they are no longer with us." If a parents asks why I usually say "for privacy reasons I can't say." After asking that one time they usually don't ask again.
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Old 10-10-2016, 09:44 AM
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And another long morning of throwing, hitting and screaming. Interview tonight for replacement. Please keep your fingers crossed for me.
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Old 10-10-2016, 10:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Snowmom View Post
If someone asks me "what happened to dck?", whether it's someone that left or termed, I just reply:
"Sometimes things just don't work out".

Nobody needs specifics. So if it's questioned again, I just say it's confidential.
Pretty much how I handle it.
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Old 10-10-2016, 10:21 AM
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i agree with everyone here. some families are just not a good fit for our program. I stress this a ton when families enroll.

I don't feel it is anyone's business why a family leaves. most of my parents are all friends on FB, so I am sure they talk among each other.

I go on business as usual. If anyone questions, I just say as the others have said, or just say we decided to part ways.

there was an occasion that I did have to tell everyone that I had a family leaving me because this child's parents were very angry at me for refusing to extend my hours for their child. (ugh) They tried to shut me down, went to licensing and said I was doing all kinds of stuff, which was all untrue. Nothing was founded, I threatened to take them to court and they dropped everything. I had to tell my families, because licensing was going to be coming out and I wanted them to know why. In the end, the parents that left lost all of their child's DC friends because of their childish behavior. The truth always comes out.

Another time I told parents is when we had a child leaving, moving across state. We had a good-bye party for this child.

When I term, or they term for reasons that really isn't a celebration (well for them, lol, maybe it is for me) I do not say anything.
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  #13  
Old 10-10-2016, 12:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nanglgrl View Post
My clients always ask "where is so and so" and I fit my reply to the reason I termed. They thought they were getting nanny care? "Unfortunately x is no longer attending. The needs of the group outweigh the needs of one family". I try to make it as vague as possible and most of the time they don't ask any other questions. If someone leaves on good terms I ask if I can share that they're leaving "x is moving a few hours away" because I do have a lot of clients get promotions or new jobs requiring that they move and I don't want people thinking I have clients jumping ship left and right. It was hard recently because I had 2 clients move and termed 2 new clients. The ones that were moving let me share that fact or shared it themselves. One client was termed due to the infant being held at home and crying all day here. Parents knew the child cried a lot because they witnessed it so I primed them for the term saying "this is why I have a two week trial period". It's rare I term and has happened more the last year than in the previous 15. I wouldn't worry about it so much if I didn't have such a mobile clientele. The average client is only here a couple of years but 99% are leaving because of a move or child starting school. I feel like if I didn't say anything other parents would see everyone leaving and start to think they were missing something about the care I provide and it could hurt my business.
like this This is what I do as well. I've never had an issue. If they push for more, my eyebrows raise and I repeat what I said and say, "and I can't say more than that. " They get it then.
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  #14  
Old 10-11-2016, 06:33 AM
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Nope! None of their business.
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  #15  
Old 10-11-2016, 10:58 AM
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Very good point about never knowing how knows who. I have had to term about 7 kids in the last 11 years and I never said anything to the others, I don't find it necessary. Honestly I try to down play it. The only time it ever got weird is when it involved another dc family.
I to fell it crosses a line. I guess if they really wanted to know you could set up a private meeting a discuss it.
Deb
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Old 10-11-2016, 11:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JackandJill View Post
I wouldn't, I think it crosses a confidentiality line. When parents ask, I always just stay as vague as possible ("not a good fit", "didn't work out", "time to move on", etc.)

On top of which, you never know who knows who. I would hate for a former family to hear I was talking about them.
I agree. I don't say who initiated it when a family leaves, and only say "not a good fit" unless the child is leaving for school.
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Old 10-11-2016, 11:28 AM
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I do! I always say something vague like "just to let you know johnny is no longer with us. I am not able to give details for confidentiality reasons but I decided to terminate care".

I have never had a parent question it or anything, I also like to inform parents because it keeps them on their toes a bit when they know I will kick anyone out if I feel I need to. I would never want a parent thinking a family left because they weren't happy.
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  #18  
Old 10-13-2016, 10:25 AM
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Thank you for all of your responses!
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