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  #1  
Old 05-10-2012, 11:51 AM
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Default Had to Exclude for HFM... Stupid DCM!

Dcm calls and says dcb has coxsackie virus. So I tell her he can't come back for at least 48 hours AFTER his last fever... She agrees.

Today I text her to see how he's doing and she tells me he's great and that she's at work! I said that's great, but was a little confused... I asked who's watching him? She said she made her 10 yo ds stay home from school to watch him and take care of him

Is it just me, or is this wrong I don't think I would trust a 10yo to watch a healthy child much less a sick one! Home alone?! Is it just me?!
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Old 05-10-2012, 11:54 AM
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When I was around that age I used to walk my sister home every day from school and stay with her for two hours before my mom gets home. Sister is 3 years younger than me. But in this day and age heck no! Thats ridiculous.
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  #3  
Old 05-10-2012, 11:55 AM
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Completely depends on the maturity of the child and whether he is used to caring for her brother or not.

I would have an issue though with the fact that she kept the child out of school though for her own personal reasons.

Last edited by Blackcat31; 05-10-2012 at 12:06 PM.
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Old 05-10-2012, 11:56 AM
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Wow I guess she must have used up here vacation for the yr already.
Nuckle head I guess her J.O.B is more important than her K.I.D.S.
I bet school would like to know why he missed today.
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  #5  
Old 05-10-2012, 11:58 AM
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I just feel like this dcm doesn't take any responsibility for this poor little guy EVER! He doesn't want his brother! He needs his mommy! KWIM?! When I was little my parents left me home alone at 7yo to go for walks and stuff (I was an only child)... But we lived in the country and that was 20 years ago! If she's missed work and can't miss more than I had no idea because he's here everyday of every week for 55+ hours a week
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Old 05-10-2012, 11:59 AM
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Seriously!!! i have said it before on a pp and i am saying it again. There should be an exam for parents to be able to have kids and they need to pass it 100%. what in the world is wrong with these people.
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  #7  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:03 PM
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This dcm has mentioned having another baby... But says she would only get a week maternity leave! And then goes on to say how she wouldn't want more than that anyways so its okay! So why have these kids if you don't want to be with them?? PLEASE GOD DON'T HAVE ANYMORE KIDS!!
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:04 PM
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My question is, why is it ok for the daughter to miss school but mom can't miss work? Who's the parent here? What is she teaching the 10 year old? Just goes to show that some parents will let any body else take care of their child.
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:17 PM
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It is her son who had to stay home with him. Sorry I thought I put ds either way! But yeah... She has a 15yo dd too who has to get dcb ready every morning while dcm gets herself ready... So obviously the parent child roles are reversed in this situation! Unbelievable
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:17 PM
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I would have a very hard time not calling and reporting this.
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  #11  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soupyszoo View Post
This dcm has mentioned having another baby... But says she would only get a week maternity leave! And then goes on to say how she wouldn't want more than that anyways so its okay! So why have these kids if you don't want to be with them?? PLEASE GOD DON'T HAVE ANYMORE KIDS!!
There is no way she would only get a week maternity leave! That would so be against the law! What does she do for a living?
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:22 PM
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OMG. Why would you ever think it's ok to let the 10 db stay home when you have a 15 year old dd? Would like to know this mom is smoking.
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  #13  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:26 PM
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There is no way she would only get a week maternity leave! That would so be against the law! What does she do for a living?
That is not necessarily true. It is not a law that ALL women get maternity leave. I think it depends on the company and whether or not the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) applies and if the mother qualifies.

I have had several parents who returned to work within days of having a baby.

I had a dcm a few years back that had a baby on Thursday and I had the child in daycare on Monday morning.

http://www.ehow.com/about_5434685_ma...eave-laws.html
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
That is not necessarily true. It is not a law that ALL women get maternity leave. I think it depends on the company and whether or not the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) applies and if the mother qualifies.

I have had several parents who returned to work within days of having a baby.

I had a dcm a few years back that had a baby on Thursday and I had the child in daycare on Monday morning.

http://www.ehow.com/about_5434685_ma...eave-laws.html
What happens if your doctor won't release you back to work? Also, we can't legally take babies into childcare here till 6 weeks! So unless you have grandmas or someone else who can watch them they can't go to childcare.
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
What happens if your doctor won't release you back to work? Also, we can't legally take babies into childcare here till 6 weeks! So unless you have grandmas or someone else who can watch them they can't go to childcare.
I would assume (but can't say for sure) that if your doctor doesn't approve you to go back to work, then you can't go.

I guess I was just trying to clarify that there is no law that says any employee is absolutely guaranteed to receive maternity leave.

As far as taking an baby that young, I got "special permission" from my licensor to take this infant as the mom was a single mom with no family or friends in the area to help her out.
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  #16  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
What happens if your doctor won't release you back to work? Also, we can't legally take babies into childcare here till 6 weeks! So unless you have grandmas or someone else who can watch them they can't go to childcare.
what state are you in I have never heard of this
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  #17  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:37 PM
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I would not leave a 10 year old home with a sick child no matter what she/he was used to doing. What if the baby's fever spiked? I hope she is not giving him medicine, cooking or anything. Goodness, a million things could happen with those two alone and the mom would never know until it was too late. This situation is very sad to me.
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  #18  
Old 05-10-2012, 12:53 PM
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I thought it was a law that everyone gets at least 6 weeks maternity leave regardless. But I don't know for sure...

This is the same dcm that thinks its cute that dcb climbs up on the stove and eats whatever's cooking!! It's crazy!
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Old 05-10-2012, 12:59 PM
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My neighbors have a five and seven year old. The dad is a sheriff.

When one of them is sick and can't go to school, they leave them both home together all day long.

I'm assuming they've been doing this all year, because in October the youngest one was out playing alone before the bus had dropped the other ones off, and I asked him why he was home already, he said "Dylan is sick today". But, I didn't find out til later that they had been home alone all day long.

Yet these same kids can't even play together for 20 minutes without fighting.
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Old 05-10-2012, 01:02 PM
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Originally Posted by youretooloud View Post
My neighbors have a five and seven year old. The dad is a sheriff.

When one of them is sick and can't go to school, they leave them both home together all day long.

I'm assuming they've been doing this all year, because in October the youngest one was out playing alone before the bus had dropped the other ones off, and I asked him why he was home already, he said "Dylan is sick today". But, I didn't find out til later that they had been home alone all day long.

Yet these same kids can't even play together for 20 minutes without fighting.
That's scary! I have an 8 yo dd and she is awesome and one of the smartest kids I've ever met... But I would never trust her with taking care of my 2yo dd home alone for 10 hours!! Insane! Kids don't have common sense yet at that age IMO! They are still learning! What if there was a fire or an emergency? Would they know what to do?! We always hope our kids would do the right thing, but the truth is in a panic they probably wouldnt
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  #21  
Old 05-10-2012, 01:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soupyszoo View Post
I thought it was a law that everyone gets at least 6 weeks maternity leave regardless. But I don't know for sure...

This is the same dcm that thinks its cute that dcb climbs up on the stove and eats whatever's cooking!! It's crazy!
Me too! I swear its a law for the 6 weeks maternity leave.
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  #22  
Old 05-10-2012, 02:17 PM
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Sure, you can take 6 weeks maternity leave (I think it's actually up to 12), but that doesn't mean you will get paid for it. I personally took 8 weeks but was only paid for the 2 weeks I had for vacation time. Chances are, she's talking about what she would get paid for.
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Old 05-10-2012, 02:21 PM
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It is up to your obgyn here in az!!! If on your 6 weeks check up he considers your are not ready to go back to work he can stand your legal maternity leave and your employer must respect that, but only if it's medically necessary!!!
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Old 05-10-2012, 02:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom View Post
I would not leave a 10 year old home with a sick child no matter what she/he was used to doing. What if the baby's fever spiked? I hope she is not giving him medicine, cooking or anything. Goodness, a million things could happen with those two alone and the mom would never know until it was too late. This situation is very sad to me.
I TOTALLY AGREE!!! Super scary!
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Old 05-10-2012, 04:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
I would assume (but can't say for sure) that if your doctor doesn't approve you to go back to work, then you can't go.

I guess I was just trying to clarify that there is no law that says any employee is absolutely guaranteed to receive maternity leave.

As far as taking an baby that young, I got "special permission" from my licensor to take this infant as the mom was a single mom with no family or friends in the area to help her out.

ITA with you on the maternity leave. And even if they get the leave most of the time or at least at most places I ever worked it was all unpaid. I worked at a small public library & they were very lenient with what I took off for all of my leaves (I took 8 weeks with #1, 12 weeks with #2 & 15 weeks with #3) BUT it was all unpaid. Maybe the mom would only get 1 week of paid time off & feels she can't stay home unpaid. Weird - why have kids like the original poster said!

Anyway, I agree it is very wrong to leave the sick child home with a 10-year old who should be in school! BTW I have a responsible 10-year-old boy & I would never leave him in charge of a sibling, maybe when he is 13 for a short errand, but never all day to care for a sickie!
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  #26  
Old 05-10-2012, 05:04 PM
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So i decied to respond to the leave the 10 YO home to take care of a sick sibling. I know a sigle mother that did this all the time she had 4 children and

would keep the oldest home any time one of the younger 3 was sick. When the older child was in the 5th grade she got a letter from the school saying

that the child had missed soo many days from being "sick" (mom would call and tell the school the oldest child was sick also) that he would need a

doctors note everytime he need to be out the rest of the year. (this was about thanksgiving) She laugphed at the letter and the next time she called

the child in sick, CPS showed up at her door that day tp do a well check because if a child is sick that much then something is wrong. Short version of

the story the CPS almost took her ckids from her.
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Old 05-10-2012, 07:09 PM
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I would have a very hard time not calling and reporting this.
I'd have no choice but to report this here as I believe the minimum legal age of a caregiver of a child under 6 is 14 years old.
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  #28  
Old 05-11-2012, 05:16 AM
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I am not sure what the law is where I am on the minimum age for a child to watch another child (I just learned there is not a minimum age to leave a child home for a short time), but I would never have trusted my boys to watch thier sister when they were only 10 yo. And I would definitely not have my 10 yo daughter watch younger children. That is too much responsibility, imo. She has just recently matured where I can even consider leaving her for a few minutes. Possibly, I would let my 10 yo stay home while I do a super quick errand...but even that makes me nervous. My oldest was about 12 yo before I would have him watch my daughter who was 3 yo at the time for an hour or less. But never when she was sick and needed extra care. To me, that is a parent's responsibility, not an older child's.
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