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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Not a Good Situation
Hunni Bee 11:35 PM 08-12-2011
Some of you know I work at a center, and I have a 5yo in my room who has been diagnosed with some behavioral and mental issues. She is very challenging to deal with on a daily basis...tantrums, fighting, must have EVERYTHING her way....she basically needs her own adult. But she's being raised in a kinship care situation and came from a pretty bad home as a 3yo...and we've been helping her family since she started almost 2 years ago.

Recently, the relative who keeps her came in and displayed some inappropriate behavior and language about a situation that she should have spoken with me or the director privately about. There were other staff and (including her own) children present when she did this. We spoke to out director about it, who then spoke to her about it. She became angry, and confronted us during daycare hours and again in front of many children this time and her own child. Since then she has been very distant, and some mornings even lets the child in the door and leaves without a word.

The child's behavior has gone from challenging to super challenging since these incidents. It's like she witness her relative being disrespectful toward us, and she no longer feels its important for her to mind us either. Her relative is the kind of person who would talk against us in front of the child...and she is a very bright and perceptive child.

Soooo...this sucks and I don't know how to handle it. Im just trying to bide my time til school lets back in, in 3 weeks...but we end up jockeying her between teachers throughout the day because she upsets whatever room she's in so much that the teacher can't stand more than a couple hours at a time.

Oh and she's there 9 to 6 every and does NOT nap.

Our director doesn't term often...it has to be absolutely horrid for her to term. Plus she will never term if a parent is already angry at us, because of the whole fake-licensing-report thing.
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Kaddidle Care 11:25 AM 08-13-2011
Will the child be going to Kindy this fall?
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Hunni Bee 03:26 PM 08-13-2011
Yes she will...she went to Pre-K last year. So we're kind of struggling to make through the summer...and thats sounds bad
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Kaddidle Care 04:08 PM 08-13-2011
Hmm - well you're talking what 2-3 more weeks? Do you think you can make it? There IS a light at the end of the tunnel!

There is a reason they age out - our PreK's that are going to Kindy are testing the boundaries big time right now too. I think it's partially nerves - they know they're headed to bigger things now.

As far as the guardians speaking inappropriately to the staff in front of the children - that needed to be addressed long ago. Staff bullying is grounds for immediate termination in our Center. If they can't act grown up then they can watch her themselves.

I'm not getting what you mean about the fake licensing report thing.
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familyschoolcare 04:49 PM 08-13-2011
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
I'm not getting what you mean about the fake licensing report thing.
When someone calls licensing and lies to them just so licensing will come and make a surprise inspection. Happens alot here in cal. B/C "they" have one week to make a surprise vistit on any legitamate complaint and the person making the complaint has the right to know the outcome. So an upset parent could call and say on such and such day when I called and opicked up my child I say a teacher doing such and such and not only would licensing have to go out with in one week but lic. would not tell who made the complaint and would (if it is what they whanted) call the person that made the complaint and tell the the outcome. Which means that if nothing came of it then they could just make up another lie or get someone else to make up another lie.
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Kaddidle Care 05:18 PM 08-13-2011
If you all aren't doing anything wrong then you have nothing to hide. Bring it on!

All of our inspections are surprise - and if they find anything wrong we correct it. It's no biggie.

Who else are they going to get to lie for them? Another parent? Don't be so paranoid.
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Hunni Bee 09:04 PM 08-13-2011
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
If you all aren't doing anything wrong then you have nothing to hide. Bring it on!

All of our inspections are surprise - and if they find anything wrong we correct it. It's no biggie.

Who else are they going to get to lie for them? Another parent? Don't be so paranoid.
I think because we're not licensed - we're religiously exempt, so we don't deal with Licensing a whole lot - the director is a little paranoid...its like licensing to her is a big bird ready to swoop down on us at the word of a disgruntled parent . I guess she's just afraid the bad publicity of a licensing visit...we're in a very "word-of-mouth" area. But by us being a Social Service-contract center, we're regulated by them and can be "inspected" at any time - not really a difference.

And like you said, Im just trying wait it out...I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions that make it a tad bit easier.
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Tags:bad situation, behavior - aggressive, inappropriate behavior, tantrums
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