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sahm2three 01:50 PM 04-17-2012
Today at nap, I caught two of the big boys (4 year olds) who spend nap in my bedroom watching a movie and playing with toys quietly being inappropriate. One of the 4 year olds had his pants partially down. The other was lying really close to him. I immediately seperated them, and asked them both what they were doing and neither of them will say anything. I have called both parents, talked to one and left a message to call me back to the other. I leave the door open and peek in on them every 15 to 20 mins or so. I thought they were old enough that they didn't have to be sleeping in the with littles. Anything else I should do?
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daycare 01:58 PM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by sahm2three:
Today at nap, I caught two of the big boys (4 year olds) who spend nap in my bedroom watching a movie and playing with toys quietly being inappropriate. One of the 4 year olds had his pants partially down. The other was lying really close to him. I immediately seperated them, and asked them both what they were doing and neither of them will say anything. I have called both parents, talked to one and left a message to call me back to the other. I leave the door open and peek in on them every 15 to 20 mins or so. I thought they were old enough that they didn't have to be sleeping in the with littles. Anything else I should do?
Sorry don't mean to blast you, but I personally would never leave two children of that age together alone even for 3 minutes. maybe just long enough to use the bathroom.

I know that you are upset over what they did, but really they did not do anything out of the ordinary that 4 year old children do. I would have just documented it, tell the children that we don't show are privates to anyone and went on with my day.

If it continues, then I would talk to the parents about it..
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sahm2three 02:03 PM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
sorry don't mean to balst you, but I personally would never leave two children of that age together alone even for 3 minutes. maybe just long enough to use the bathroom.

I know that you are upset over what they did, but really they did not do anything out of the ordinary that 4 year old children do. I would have just documented it, tell the children that we don't show are privates to anyone and went on with my day.

If it continues, then I would talk to the parents about it..
Seriously?! You wouldn't let 4 year olds out of your sight? Then they might as well all sleep with the babies. My own almost 6 year old was in the same room, but was at the other end of the bed, watching the movie (like they were supposed to be). He said he didn't even hear them talking. And like I said, I am in and out of that room many times during nap. Sorry, i dont' think it is an ok thing for them to be doing. They will no longer be allowed to be in a room together when I am not with them. Just makes me sad.
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Country Kids 02:12 PM 04-17-2012
This is always a hard one to figure out but........I had one experience that changed me leaving kids alone that were wide awake.

My sub at the time was here and the kids were playing, three of them ages 4 and 5. Well, she went into another room for something or the bathroom and when she came back they had managed to draw tatoos on each other and some where actually on their bottoms. She was not gone longer then 5 minutes! She was totally devestated and beside herself! The parents found it absolutely hilarous which helped the situation. I was hesitate to have her come back even though I had used her for years and all the kids loved her but it worked out the kids learned not to do that again and my sub learned the kids that age are lightning quick.
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daycare 02:17 PM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by sahm2three:
Seriously?! You wouldn't let 4 year olds out of your sight? Then they might as well all sleep with the babies. My own almost 6 year old was in the same room, but was at the other end of the bed, watching the movie (like they were supposed to be). He said he didn't even hear them talking. And like I said, I am in and out of that room many times during nap. Sorry, i dont' think it is an ok thing for them to be doing. They will no longer be allowed to be in a room together when I am not with them. Just makes me sad.
its ok for us not to agree...
But no way....None of my daycare kids are out of sight if I can help it. Of course, I have to use the restroom and whatnot, but I would not leave them alone for more than a few minutes.
I do agree with you that what they did is not ok, but I think that if you over react about it, in the end it will cause more harm than good. In all the years that I have been working with kids, I have it happen at least once to twice a year. And it never happens twice by the same kids.
I would just tell the parents what happened at your house. Ask the parents to reinforce that they are not to share or show their body parts with anyone. The only people that can see your body parts are mommy and daddy and just leave it at that.
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Meeko 02:41 PM 04-17-2012
My babies are in the nursery in cribs and get checked on every few minutes. Plus I have a monitor.

Everyone else is where we can see them nap. And nap they do. No nap=time to move on from my day care.
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wdmmom 02:42 PM 04-17-2012
I have 2 separate areas for napping. Kids that sleep in pack and plays in one room, kids that nap on cots in the other. Both rooms have camera systems so not only do I check on them but I can see them every second.

I would either invest in an expensive camera system or separate them and have them nap in different areas.
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daycare 02:47 PM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
My babies are in the nursery in cribs and get checked on every few minutes. Plus I have a monitor.

Everyone else is where we can see them nap. And nap they do. No nap=time to move on from my day care.
same here....I dont provide services for children that don't nap.. I need a break after 12+hour days and plus I dont' have the space for it....
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sharlan 02:57 PM 04-17-2012
I wouldn't make a big issue over it. Calmly and quietly remind the boys that you don't show anyone your privates.

I would let the parents know to reinforce the no showing anyone your privates and drop it.
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Christian Mother 03:13 PM 04-17-2012
This just started with me and I handle it the exact same way. I don't make a huge deal out of it but i do sit and talk to them about not touching each others body parts or private parts. Their young at 2 1/2 3 yrs of age so they are just discovering that they both have the same body parts and are innocent but I need to get it through to them that they don't touch each other nor do they allow anyone but their doctor or parents. I have had to talk to the parents about this also and have them reinforce it on their side as well.
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Springdaze 03:18 PM 04-17-2012
I dont think Im allowed to have children in a separate room from where I am, so Im not going to debate that, but I would have told the parents because I would hate for the parent to find out from the child.
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sahm2three 06:22 PM 04-17-2012
I sat the boys down and just told them that it wasn't appropriate to show anyone their privates. I told them that this time they aren't in trouble, but it is to not happen again. I guess I will have a 10+ hour day with no real break from now on because they will have to be in the living room with me. I do have inexpensive camera monitoring systems, but I use those for the babies that are in seperate rooms. I didn't think I would need it for the big boys. They all had toys and are allowed to watch a movie (which we don't do during non-nap time). Plus I am in and out of that room so many times. I just don't understand kids these days. In talking to one of the moms, this is a pattern with her ds. Well, that isn't normal to me. I told her it was up to her how she wanted to handle it at home, but here, they will be seperated at nap time.
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bice99 07:39 PM 04-17-2012
My video monitor was bought specifically for a kindergarten boy. I have audio monitors (and myself checking) the babies in their PNP's. They make noise when they wake up. It's the older kids that can be sneaky without making any noise. LOL

Originally Posted by sahm2three:
I sat the boys down and just told them that it wasn't appropriate to show anyone their privates. I told them that this time they aren't in trouble, but it is to not happen again. I guess I will have a 10+ hour day with no real break from now on because they will have to be in the living room with me. I do have inexpensive camera monitoring systems, but I use those for the babies that are in seperate rooms. I didn't think I would need it for the big boys. They all had toys and are allowed to watch a movie (which we don't do during non-nap time). Plus I am in and out of that room so many times. I just don't understand kids these days. In talking to one of the moms, this is a pattern with her ds. Well, that isn't normal to me. I told her it was up to her how she wanted to handle it at home, but here, they will be seperated at nap time.

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quietpoet2004 08:08 PM 04-17-2012
All the kids that I have will at least lay down (in the same room) and rest, even if they don't go to sleep. I turn music on, and they listen to it, quietly, on their cot... They don't have to go to sleep, but they must be quiet. 9 times out of 10 they DO go to sleep. They don't argue about it, they know those are the rules.
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Tags:inappropriate behavior, inappropriate touching
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