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mamamanda 06:04 AM 12-18-2015
Does anyone feed their own kids on a different schedule than their dcks? I struggle a lot with making sure I keep things fair, but my own kids are on a bit of a different schedule than dcg. Dcg gets here at 6:30 each morning. My contract says I don't actually open until 8:00, but I make an exception for her. She is always starving when she gets here and she's so tired so I don't want to make them get her up earlier to feed her. She and I eat breakfast together when she gets here. One of my kids typically wakes up about that time and joins us, but my 4 year old sleeps until around 8. I save his plate and feed him when he wakes up, but then dcg cries and carries on that she's hungry again and I've tried giving her a snack, but if she doesn't get the same thing as him she throws a fit and often throws the food which around here means you're finished with your meal and she is removed from the kitchen. I hate the dramatic fits over it each morning. Part of me feels she needs to understand that she already ate and this is ds's breakfast and she needs to go play, but I don't want to be unfair to her feeding him "in front of her" so to speak. Trying to keep things fair for both.
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Blackcat31 06:13 AM 12-18-2015
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Does anyone feed their own kids on a different schedule than their dcks? I struggle a lot with making sure I keep things fair, but my own kids are on a bit of a different schedule than dcg. Dcg gets here at 6:30 each morning. My contract says I don't actually open until 8:00, but I make an exception for her. She is always starving when she gets here and she's so tired so I don't want to make them get her up earlier to feed her. She and I eat breakfast together when she gets here. One of my kids typically wakes up about that time and joins us, but my 4 year old sleeps until around 8. I save his plate and feed him when he wakes up, but then dcg cries and carries on that she's hungry again and I've tried giving her a snack, but if she doesn't get the same thing as him she throws a fit and often throws the food which around here means you're finished with your meal and she is removed from the kitchen. I hate the dramatic fits over it each morning. Part of me feels she needs to understand that she already ate and this is ds's breakfast and she needs to go play, but I don't want to be unfair to her feeding him "in front of her" so to speak. Trying to keep things fair for both.
How old is she?
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rosieteddy 06:16 AM 12-18-2015
Could you ask parent to bring her fed? Then you could feed everyone breakfast at 8.
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nannyde 07:31 AM 12-18-2015
Parent feeds her before arrival and she goes directly back to bed at arrival.
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LysesKids 07:33 AM 12-18-2015
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Does anyone feed their own kids on a different schedule than their dcks? I struggle a lot with making sure I keep things fair, but my own kids are on a bit of a different schedule than dcg. Dcg gets here at 6:30 each morning. My contract says I don't actually open until 8:00, but I make an exception for her. She is always starving when she gets here and she's so tired so I don't want to make them get her up earlier to feed her. She and I eat breakfast together when she gets here. One of my kids typically wakes up about that time and joins us, but my 4 year old sleeps until around 8. I save his plate and feed him when he wakes up, but then dcg cries and carries on that she's hungry again and I've tried giving her a snack, but if she doesn't get the same thing as him she throws a fit and often throws the food which around here means you're finished with your meal and she is removed from the kitchen. I hate the dramatic fits over it each morning. Part of me feels she needs to understand that she already ate and this is ds's breakfast and she needs to go play, but I don't want to be unfair to her feeding him "in front of her" so to speak. Trying to keep things fair for both.
depending on the state, licensing may require you offer breakfast for any child arriving before a set time (many it's 7am)... I offer bottles to my 7am kids & do breakfast @ 8;15 when the last arrives. The child will just have to learn that if she eats break early that the best she will get is a small snack until lunch or as was suggested, have parents feed before bringing her to care ( that will never happen here)
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Fiddlesticks 08:01 AM 12-18-2015
Can you give her a snack when she arrives, and feed her breakfast when your youngest is up? I personally would not take her unless she had eaten before arrival because I do not feed children outside of our scheduled meal times (except infants), but you said you don't want to do that, so I would change things the other other direction---breakfast is at 8, here is something to tide you over.
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Unregistered 11:06 AM 12-18-2015
If she's exhausted I'd put her back to bed. Is she confusing hunger with being tired? I've known kids that do that. I don't think I've ever known a kids that was starving at 6:30am. Maybe she doesn't eat anything much for supper though.

I wouldn't serve her breakfast at 6:30 if breakfast was at 8:00. I'd ask mom to feed her first and put her to bed when she got there if she's that tired.

I might try the small snack idea and breakfast at 8:00.
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mamamanda 03:45 AM 12-21-2015
She will be 2 next month. My toddler still takes two naps and goes down for his morning nap at 8:30 so I lay her down at the same time I lay him back down. I know she is exhausted b/c she is asleep within minutes, sleeps for 2 hours, and still goes back to sleep for afternoon nap at 1:30. Ideally, I'd like to feed her something light upon arrival, he drinks a cup of milk and has some raisins typically, and then feed her "breakfast" at 8:00 with my other ds. Then lay the toddlers down at 8:30, but she acts like she is starving. First words out of her mouth are always "I eat." and she repeats it until she gets food. If I just give her something light, even toast and a banana or something like that, she continues to ask for more saying I'm still hungry. She eats a full meal and then wants another at 8:00. She will eat 3 toddler size bowls of whole grain cereal w/milk, half a piece of toast with honey, half a banana, and a full cup of milk and still want more. That seems like a lot to me for an almost 2 year old at 6:30 am, but I don't want her to legitimately be hungry.
Maybe she is confusing the feeling with being tired? I don't know.
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rosieteddy 07:10 AM 12-21-2015
I always found some toddlers do not stop eating.I would look up the portion of a toddler breakfast.The brain takes 20 min to know that you ate. That age I would definitely have parent feed at home.Then you could lay her down to sleep after breakfast at 8:00.
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Baby Beluga 07:47 AM 12-21-2015
Originally Posted by rosieteddy:
I always found some toddlers do not stop eating.I would look up the portion of a toddler breakfast.The brain takes 20 min to know that you ate. That age I would definitely have parent feed at home.Then you could lay her down to sleep after breakfast at 8:00.


I have a DCB who is like this, although he was diagnosed with SPD. He will eat until he throws up. I give him the proper portions for his age and that is it.

ETA: I would do one of a couple of options:

1) have mom and dad feed DCG at home prior to drop off.
2) have mom and dad provide a prepared breakfast each morning for DCG to eat at your house that complies with USDA guidelines.
3) Feed her your prepared breakfast like you normally do but tell her "no, you already ate" when she asks to eat when your child is eating.

Personally, I would prefer option 1 for myself. If you are opening at 6:30 for them and you technically don't open until 8:00, I think it is a bit much for them to expect you to feed her breakfast (and only her) breakfast that early.
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mamamanda 10:48 AM 12-21-2015
Thank you for the replies! It would be easier for me if they fed her ahead of time, but I think I just feel for the mom & little girl b/c she is so tired all the time and mom doesn't want to put her to bed earlier b/c she only gets 2 hrs a day with her as it is. I try to feed her so that mom can let her sleep longer and not have to put her to bed any earlier the night before. She's only sleeping 8/8:30 at night until 6:15 in the morning as it is. I will definitely look up the portion sizes. Eye opener for me: they brought her late and fed her before she came in and she still started begging to eat as soon as she got here. Maybe its more routine than I'm actually hungry.
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Thriftylady 10:52 AM 12-21-2015
I would do a small snack on arrival and breakfast later.
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BabyMonkeys 12:09 PM 12-24-2015
What is your reason for not wanting to feed her breakfast with your son? Is it a financial issue? Maybe increase her tuition to cover the additional meal?
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jenboo 10:04 AM 12-25-2015
Originally Posted by angelw2babies:
What is your reason for not wanting to feed her breakfast with your son? Is it a financial issue? Maybe increase her tuition to cover the additional meal?
I'm wondering this too. If she is hungry and actually eats it all, why not give her a breakfast when she arrives and another one with your son.

I know that when I'm up super early, I usually eat an extra breakfast because I get hungrier quicker.
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Unregistered 08:38 AM 12-26-2015
Originally Posted by angelw2babies:
What is your reason for not wanting to feed her breakfast with your son? Is it a financial issue? Maybe increase her tuition to cover the additional meal?
To me it wouldnt so much be a financial issue as a behavioral issue.

OP said:

Originally Posted by mamamanda:
my 4 year old sleeps until around 8. I save his plate and feed him when he wakes up, but then dcg cries and carries on that she's hungry again and I've tried giving her a snack, but if she doesn't get the same thing as him she throws a fit and often throws the food which around here means you're finished with your meal and she is removed from the kitchen. I hate the dramatic fits over it each morning.
So I think its more of a "You cant always have what you want just because you want it" type situation.
OP offers a snack. Child doesnt want it.
Wants same thing DS has. Shes already had that.
I think if OP gives her what she wants it would be teaching her the wrong thing.
If child is truly hungry again, she could eat tne snack offered.
I wouldnt "give in" either.
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LysesKids 05:01 PM 12-26-2015
Originally Posted by Thriftylady:
I would do a small snack on arrival and breakfast later.
This is what I do with early arrivals, but then all of mine only want a bottle before 8am too lol; they know "breakfast" is started around 8:15 or so. Like I said before, some states actually require you to offer breakfast to early arrivals if you are licensed and if that's the case then the child should be offered a Snack at the later time.
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