Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCPs Opening and Closing My Front Door 10 Times in 30 Degree Weather... WWYD?
SunshineMama 07:00 AM 11-08-2012
I have posted about this in the summer time, and the issue faded away with the weather getting milder and me not having to use AC or heat.

Now I am having the same issue with the same family. At pick up and drop off, the parents keep opening my front door and leaving it open for too long. Today, I opened the door and the 1st child didnt want to come in, so I closed it and waited for the sibling and the parent to get to the door. I opened the door again and the kids and parent just stood there. The kids were squabbling and trying to fight over who got to knock on the door. I told them to come in bc the heat is on (it's 30 degrees outside at this point), and the parent finally brings them in.

At this point, the kids are upset about the knocking still (one pushed the other, the other tried to bite...mind you they are 3.5), so the dad opens the front door again and tells the first kid to go back outside and knock. So the kid goes outside, knocks, and then dad opens the door and comes back in. The second kid is still upset, so he opens the front door yet again, and holds it open and tells the kid to go out and get their turn knocking, and the kid stands there and doesnt want to go out (she said it was too cold... well duh)- the entire time letting in all of the cold air while he held the door open.

Another parent comes to the door, so it gets opened again. Parent 1 decides to take his exit, and stands in the doorway, with the door wide open, and gives hugs and kisses to both kids, then each wanted a high 5 so he gave them one, then they wanted another hug each, then the other daycare kids wanted high 5's and his kids got jealous.... etc etc. The whole time, my entire front door is open, I am now feeling a chill, the other dcm has this look on her face like wth is going on. Throughout the whole drop off ordeal, I said a few different times that the heat is on and the door needs to stay closed.

I have a very large open floor plan house, so it takes a few hours to recover from pick up and drop off. I have tried to politely address it by saying, come in, the ac/heat is on., etc.. but they keep leaving my darn door wide open.

What would you all do in this situation? Would you keep reminding them to keep the door closed? (I feel like I have now officially been polite enough and borderline using my teacher voice and to no avail). It's not like I can have a financial penalty can I?

This is the same family whom I have to tell everyday to take their shoes off because I just cleaned the carpets in my entire house. I am 33 weeks pregnant and did all the carpets myself...a lot of work They just arent being polite and after I keep telling them over and over, it has now gotten disrespectful in my eyes.
Reply
littlemissmuffet 07:07 AM 11-08-2012
First situation: "Listen John, I don't want to have to keep reminding you to keep the entrance door closed. Please show me and my home some respect. Bring the kids to the door all at once - enter, close the door behind you. If this is something that you just simply cannot do, I will be keeping the doors locked at all times - goodbyes will be done outside and once you're done you can knock and I will let the kids in."

Second situation: "Jack, you can either do your goodbye outside on the step BEFORE entering my home - or come inside and close the door behind you before doing your goodbye. I'm not paying to heat my home just for you to let all the hot air out while you stand there kissing/hugging your kids. Please, show some respect."
Reply
crazydaycarelady 07:08 AM 11-08-2012
I have the same problem. I don't get it either. If you OPEN a door to go in isn't it an automatic response to close the door behind you? I usually have either the A/C on or the heater so either way they are pi$$ing me off!

It's not surprising though. I have had to tell dcparents some of the most common sense things that I NEVER would have thought I'd have to tell people: don't throw cigaratte butts into my yard, don't kick my dog, don't steal things from my flower garden or walk through it for that matter. Sheesh!
Reply
SunshineMama 07:26 AM 11-08-2012
I would love to say the words, "please show some respect to my home." Maybe I have a backbone issue... I felt like by telling them to keep the door closed bc the heat is on, that would be enough. I feel like if I have to tell them to be respectful, that is basically treating them like children. Which is what it sounds like I need to do, but I really hate doing that
Reply
Zoe 07:26 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I have the same problem. I don't get it either. If you OPEN a door to go in isn't it an automatic response to close the door behind you? I usually have either the A/C on or the heater so either way they are pi$$ing me off!

It's not surprising though. I have had to tell dcparents some of the most common sense things that I NEVER would have thought I'd have to tell people: don't throw cigaratte butts into my yard, don't kick my dog, don't steal things from my flower garden or walk through it for that matter. Sheesh!
Don't kick your dog?! Oh my goodness that would be an immediate termination in my eyes. Wow.

To the OP, just call them out on it. Say hey dcp, please shut the door and keep it shut. Once you're in the house you say goodbye then you leave. No more of this in and out stuff, my house costs too much to heat for you to be doing this.
Reply
crazydaycarelady 07:35 AM 11-08-2012
Yes, I had a dcd pick up and he had his dog in the back of his truck. Well, of course my dog ran over there and started barking at his dog so he kicked my dog!
Reply
MyAngels 07:38 AM 11-08-2012
I'd tell them you're going to have to raise their rates to cover the increased cost of heating and cooling your house since they can't seem to keep the door closed during drop off and pick up.
Reply
youretooloud 07:45 AM 11-08-2012
I think I would actually be obnoxious about it, and put a sign on the door that said "Open the door ONCE to go in, and ONCE to go out"

Then, in small letters at the bottom, write "it is expensive to run the heater, please be respectful of my home".
Reply
littlemissmuffet 07:53 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
I would love to say the words, "please show some respect to my home." Maybe I have a backbone issue... I felt like by telling them to keep the door closed bc the heat is on, that would be enough. I feel like if I have to tell them to be respectful, that is basically treating them like children. Which is what it sounds like I need to do, but I really hate doing that
I understand. It *IS* like treating them like children... but only because they are acting like children
Reminding them nicely isn't working - so you might have to be more stern about it.

I agree with the PP who suggested telling them you will be raising their rates to help offset the cost of heating/cooling your home.
Reply
SilverSabre25 07:53 AM 11-08-2012
Don't MAKE me raise my rates on you to cover the cost of the heating bill this winter!
Reply
itlw8 08:01 AM 11-08-2012
Post a sign today on the front door and yes you can make a fine. They cost you money they can pay it.

And I would speak up and say yes I posted that sign because of your family.

PLEASE speak up.
Reply
Sunshine44 08:06 AM 11-08-2012
I would definitely say something. I might actually push them nicely out of the way and close the door for them every single time. Send a note home saying exactly what you've told us and then put a sign on the front door. Tell lil johnny to make sure daddy closes the door each morning.

Disrespect from parents is awful. I can't stand it when my parents do this on hot days. All my air goes bye bye.
Reply
Blackcat31 08:22 AM 11-08-2012
I do not mean this harshly or rude at all, but what is it that you are all afraid of???

......if this were happening with children none of us would hesitate for one second to say "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!"


....but for some reason, everyone is trying to find creative solutions and "nice" ways to say that to adults......

who are NOT children and should know better

Honestly, why are you not just saying "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!!" ??????

For every second you hesitate and worry about hurting someone's feelings your dollars are slipping past.......

~it's not rocket science.... just shut the flipping door!!
Reply
Childminder 08:24 AM 11-08-2012
Close the door you're letting money out the door.
Reply
bunnyslippers 08:34 AM 11-08-2012
I agree with BC. We all try so hard to find nice ways to word things, and it isn't necessary! I would just tell him to shut the door! If it continues, take away his door priveleges. Lock the front door and make him stand in the cold until you are ready to open it for him.

People are amazingly disrespectful. If we allow the behavior in our own homes, we are disrespecting ourselves. You are providing a service for him, but that does not mean you have to roll over and let him (or anyone else) walk all over you.
Reply
SunshineMama 08:37 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I do not mean this harshly or rude at all, but what is it that you are all afraid of???

......if this were happening with children none of us would hesitate for one second to say "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!"


....but for some reason, everyone is trying to find creative solutions and "nice" ways to say that to adults......

who are NOT children and should know better

Honestly, why are you not just saying "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!!" ??????

For every second you hesitate and worry about hurting someone's feelings your dollars are slipping past.......

~it's not rocket science.... just shut the flipping door!!
I have shut the door and I have shut it myself whenever possible. Then dcd literally stands smack in the doorway, I tell him (again) that the heat is on, and he blatently just keeps standing there, taking his sweet time to say his goodbye's etc. It's literally like I would have to guide him out of the way physically, or slam the door on him as he is standing there, which is what I am having the issue with. That, and I am one of those people who are always concerned what others think, something I am trying to get over.

I am pretty sure I am done with this family anyway. Next week is their last week here for winter break and I dont think I will renew their contract. This is the same family who punishes their kids for potty accidents by putting them in cold showers." They hit and kick and scratch and bite and whine and yell and scream, probably bc thats what is going on at home. The parents have no control over their kids, and I have to spend most of my energy correcting them all day and teaching them, just to do it again the next day. It is tedious and miserable and exhausting. The kids have become increasingly violent to themselves and other kids within the past month, and their behavior is disrupting everyone else. The door disrespect is just the nail in the coffin. I feel bad bc this was one of my first families and I have watched these children grow and invested a lot of time and effort into them, but I think i have had my fill.
Reply
Willow 08:42 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I do not mean this harshly or rude at all, but what is it that you are all afraid of???

......if this were happening with children none of us would hesitate for one second to say "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!"


....but for some reason, everyone is trying to find creative solutions and "nice" ways to say that to adults......

who are NOT children and should know better

Honestly, why are you not just saying "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!!" ??????

For every second you hesitate and worry about hurting someone's feelings your dollars are slipping past.......

~it's not rocket science.... just shut the flipping door!!

This is where my mind went too lol.

Even if you don't have a backbone and want to throw a please in there what are they going to say.....no??
Reply
Willow 08:45 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
I have shut the door and I have shut it myself whenever possible. Then dcd literally stands smack in the doorway, I tell him (again) that the heat is on, and he blatently just keeps standing there, taking his sweet time to say his goodbye's etc.

"Excuse me Mr. Blahblah, I'm just going to scooch you forward a bit so I can close the door behind you as it's getting cold in here."


I don't blame you for ultimately wanting to terminate though. The cold shower bit would have laid that puppy to rest loooooong ago.
Reply
SunshineMama 08:46 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:
This is where my mind went too lol.

Even if you don't have a backbone and want to throw a please in there what are they going to say.....no??
LOL I know it sounds stupid

Literally, I say shut the door and they don't say "no," they just ignore me basically and stand in the doorway anyway.
Reply
SunshineMama 08:48 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:
"Excuse me Mr. Blahblah, I'm just going to scooch you forward a bit so I can close the door behind you as it's getting cold in here."


I don't blame you for ultimately wanting to terminate though. The cold shower bit would have laid that puppy to rest loooooong ago.
I will be scooching this parent in and out 3 times a morning

No shocker why the kids are out of control
Reply
coolconfidentme 08:56 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I do not mean this harshly or rude at all, but what is it that you are all afraid of???

......if this were happening with children none of us would hesitate for one second to say "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!"


....but for some reason, everyone is trying to find creative solutions and "nice" ways to say that to adults......

who are NOT children and should know better

Honestly, why are you not just saying "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!!" ??????

For every second you hesitate and worry about hurting someone's feelings your dollars are slipping past.......

~it's not rocket science.... just shut the flipping door!!
I have said it to DCP before, "Please shut the door. I'm sure you can appreciate the cost of a heat bill these days." ...& I smile while doing so. As soon as they comply, I thank them.
Reply
Blackcat31 09:01 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:
This is where my mind went too lol.

Even if you don't have a backbone and want to throw a please in there what are they going to say.....no??
Originally Posted by coolconfidentme:
I have said it to DCP before, "Please shut the door. I'm sure you can appreciate the cost of a heat bill these days." ...& I smile while doing so. As soon as they comply, I thank them.
Yeah, I live in northern MN so everyone here understands that for every 30 seconds you leave the door open you are pretty much throwing your money out with the escaping heat.

It's 34F degrees here today....and we are all talking about how nice it is.

My furnace have been running since September and probably won't stop until May so...
Reply
Willow 09:42 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Yeah, I live in northern MN so everyone here understands that for every 30 seconds you leave the door open you are pretty much throwing your money out with the escaping heat.

It's 34F degrees here today....and we are all talking about how nice it is.

My furnace have been running since September and probably won't stop until May so...

Yesterday AND today! Although I've got a high of 45 going on right now!!

It's BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!


Maybe that's why it's not nearly as big of a deal to ask someone if they were born in a barn should they leave the door hanging wide open
Reply
Happy Hearts 10:11 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:

Maybe that's why it's not nearly as big of a deal to ask someone if they were born in a barn should they leave the door hanging wide open
I asked that to my son once and he replied, "Well, Jesus was and he turned out fine."
Reply
Country Kids 10:20 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Sparrow:
I asked that to my son once and he replied, "Well, Jesus was and he turned out fine."
Thank you so much for the laugh today!

I loved this and my daughter said she will be making of a note of this for when I ask her the same thing.
Reply
lovemykidstoo 11:06 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
I will be scooching this parent in and out 3 times a morning

No shocker why the kids are out of control
If you need to scooch him 3 times a morning then so be it. Maybe he'll get the drift after awhile. I would ask him to shut the door once and then I would say, excuse me, push past him and close it while saying that your last bill was ridiculous and you have to keep the door closed. Sorry.

I used to have 2 kids that did that bologna about who would knock first every morning. Then if I opened the door before they did knock they would throw a fit. I finally said, get over it, get in here it's cold. I don't know why in the world parents allow such behavior.
Reply
mrsp'slilpeeps 11:12 AM 11-08-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I do not mean this harshly or rude at all, but what is it that you are all afraid of???

......if this were happening with children none of us would hesitate for one second to say "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!"


....but for some reason, everyone is trying to find creative solutions and "nice" ways to say that to adults......

who are NOT children and should know better

Honestly, why are you not just saying "SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!!" ??????

For every second you hesitate and worry about hurting someone's feelings your dollars are slipping past.......

~it's not rocket science.... just shut the flipping door!!

Or as my mother used to say, We're not heating southern Alberta, close the door!
Reply
Springdaze 08:26 AM 11-09-2012
the way my place is set up, I would be worried about littles walking out the door! years ago we were outside and a parent left both the back door and the front door open. i turned around and my 2 yo son is walking into the driveway!
Reply
MarinaVanessa 10:36 AM 11-09-2012
I would lock the door and put a big fat sign on it that said

THE HEAT IS ON. THE DOOR IS LOCKED.
KNOCK WHEN THE CHILDREN ARE READY TO COME IN

Then when this particular DCD came to my door I would open the door just enough to get myself through the door and put my hand out in a "stop" motion if he came close to the door, and usher both kids inside the home while saying over my shoulder "Have a great day at work Bill, sorry gotta hurry. Heat is on" and then quickly shut the door. The kids may cry, the dad may feel dejected but .... oh well. The kids will get over it quickly and hopefully so will the dad. Personally I wouldn't feel too bad for DCD if I was constantly reminding him for months about the door and he continued to disregard my requests.

The idea about charging them extra for the heat is also an enticing idea. Surprise him by keeping a secret log for the next week of how much time he stands there letting the heat out and then everage it. Then fgure out how long it takes for the house to go back to the temperature it was at before he arrived and figure out how much the cost of the heat is from the time that he arrives until the house is heated again. Then you can give him the itemized log of time he stands there and the breakdown of the costs lol.

"Unfortunately Bill, you're the only client that is having trouble with this and this has been happening for months since the summer. So let me know whether you'd rather pay the extra fee to be allowed to stand there for 10 minutes each day ... extra time will be charged extra ... or if you would rather just quickly come in and out of the house"
Reply
kitykids3 12:15 PM 11-09-2012
I've got the heat on here for 6 months of the year too and I have parents do the same thing! I bet at their house they wouldn't be leaving it open like that.

I usually leave the door locked anyways, then if kids are dawdling I tell them to hurry in, or out, cuz the heat's on. That's my hint to parents.

On occassion I have addressed it in my newsletters and if bad enough I put a sign at eye level that says the heat is on, please keep door shut. Luckily I have parents that are for the most part respectful at that point.
Same with taking shoes off, once I've addressed it in a newsletter and put a sign up, it seems to help.
Reply
Reply Up