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Unregistered 11:38 AM 01-06-2015
I have a problem ...maybe
I have a very new client that has a early am start
she comes and sits and breast feeds for 10-20 min ..no one else is here
then at pickup comes at pick up time and sits and breast feeds again
for 15 mins or more
the child is "2" in Feb
I asked yesterday ..how long does she plan to BF ..she stated an other year
so .....I have a plan
I will do my best to feed this child as much as possible during the day
and at pick up I will do my best to be busy and not availible to visit and have the gang busy in an other room
she is a lovely young mom and is open to ideas and learning ..which is great
and I know it is a personal choice of how long one bf .....but
I feel this one might confuse the rest of my gang and she often ( the child ) will stand on the floor while mom on couch and feed ...
and I am not sure how I feel about a 2 1/2 year old breast feeding
Reply
Blackcat31 11:47 AM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a problem ...maybe
I have a very new client that has a early am start
she comes and sits and breast feeds for 10-20 min ..no one else is here
then at pickup comes at pick up time and sits and breast feeds again
for 15 mins or more
the child is "2" in Feb
I asked yesterday ..how long does she plan to BF ..she stated an other year
so .....I have a plan
I will do my best to feed this child as much as possible during the day
and at pick up I will do my best to be busy and not availible to visit and have the gang busy in an other room
she is a lovely young mom and is open to ideas and learning ..which is great
and I know it is a personal choice of how long one bf .....but
I feel this one might confuse the rest of my gang and she often ( the child ) will stand on the floor while mom on couch and feed ...
and I am not sure how I feel about a 2 1/2 year old breast feeding
Why does the morning feeding have to occur AT your house? Can't she nurse before dropping off?

Same with the pick up feedings? Why do they have to take place AT your house? At 2 yrs old the child can wait until they get home.

I would NOT entertain that for ANY age child when the feedings can occur BEFORE drop off and AFTER pick up. During the day is a completely different thing but those two particular times are not something I would be okay with as there really doesn't seem to be a reason for it...kwim? not at that age.
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Sugaree 11:47 AM 01-06-2015
At the center my son goes to I was allowed to BF in his room in the morning, at lunch, and at pickup. Once he moved into the toddler/pre-toddler room (~16 months) I was asked to go to the nursing lounge instead of his classroom. I'm cool with that. I know that since you're a home provider that might not work for you though.

I'm one of those mothers who after making it to my initial goal of a year decided that we would keep nursing until he got ready to stop. He's 18 months old now and has been a milk monster for the last couple of weeks. Most children self-wean before their 4th birthday. I do try to limit nursing in the morning at drop-off, but will nurse at pickup in the afternoon. A lot of it is comfort nursing rather than actually being hungry or thirsty.
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NeedaVaca 11:55 AM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Why does the morning feeding have to occur AT your house? Can't she nurse before dropping off?

Same with the pick up feedings? Why do they have to take place AT your house? At 2 yrs old the child can wait until they get home.

I would NOT entertain that for ANY age child when the feedings can occur BEFORE drop off and AFTER pick up. During the day is a completely different thing but those two particular times are not something I would be okay with as there really doesn't seem to be a reason for it...kwim? not at that age.

Reply
preschoolteacher 11:58 AM 01-06-2015
First of all, I am very pro-breastfeeding. I nursed my son until he was 20 months old.

That being said, an older toddler does NOT and should NOT nurse during drop-offs and pick-ups at daycare. Unless it's a daycare center and there is a private nursing lounge for such things (like the previous poster mentioned). Nursing a toddler in a nursing lounge, awesome. Great.

But an older toddler likely--I'd say 99.9% of the time--is nursing for comfort during drop-offs and pick-ups rather than for nourishment. That's fine if it can be done in a private nursing lounge without turning drop-off/pick-up into a big show that disrupts the entire daycare, like I would imagine it does in a home setting. Isee this as kind of like the kid who throws a tantrum during drop-off/pick-up or refuses to take off his own shoes but is perfectly capable of doing so. It's a way to get Mom time. It's a way to delay the inevitable goodbye. I personally think that long drop-offs and pick-ups are extremely disruptive and I do everything I can to make sure they don't happen.

As a home daycare provider, I would consider offering a nursing space for a mom with a very young infant. I'm not saying I would do it, but I would consider it. The mom would have to be very respectful of what's going on the daycare and be sure that her nursing is not a distraction.

I would not provide space for a nursing toddler.

If I were you, I'd be up front with the mom and tell her that the arrangement is no longer working out for you, and that you will need her to nurse her child before/after pick ups and drop offs from now on.
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midaycare 11:58 AM 01-06-2015
Dcm needs to nurse before drop off, and can go into another room (bedroom, maybe) at pickup.
Reply
Unregistered 12:11 PM 01-06-2015
thanks for the fast replies
and yes I know most of it
I myself feel it is a comfort thing ...mainly for the mom ...
she is new to day care and again a young mom ...phoned lots the first day
we talked about it yesterday ....when I asked how long
and I asked if the dg was getting any to eat from mom
she said yes
I giggled and said " now that is why she wont eat anything here "
I also found out the child does not have " a breakfast " before coming here so only milk
mom asked how long I fed my girl for I said we both weaned each other at 1 1/2 years old
and my girl and I are close I said for it can be bonding too ..so letting her feel the comfortable with me talking about this
I am going to be gentle how I go about this ..they have only been here for a short time but mom again seems open to imput
the one thing if anything about human nature I have learnt ...is it is not what you say it is how you say it
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TheGoodLife 12:19 PM 01-06-2015
I'm pro BFing, but I personally would sit down and explain that it is better for the feedings to be off property. Give DCG some mommy-daughter time at home before leaving, and have a special nursing moment when they get home. Let her know that extended drop offs and pick ups just don't really work at your daycare and you fully support extended BFing but it needs to be done at home. You can put a stop to it w/o any shame or negativity especially when it sou ds like DCM is just genuinely caring for her daughter and open to communication
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Heidi 12:31 PM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by preschoolteacher:
First of all, I am very pro-breastfeeding. I nursed my son until he was 20 months old.

That being said, an older toddler does NOT and should NOT nurse during drop-offs and pick-ups at daycare. Unless it's a daycare center and there is a private nursing lounge for such things (like the previous poster mentioned). Nursing a toddler in a nursing lounge, awesome. Great.

But an older toddler likely--I'd say 99.9% of the time--is nursing for comfort during drop-offs and pick-ups rather than for nourishment. That's fine if it can be done in a private nursing lounge without turning drop-off/pick-up into a big show that disrupts the entire daycare, like I would imagine it does in a home setting. Isee this as kind of like the kid who throws a tantrum during drop-off/pick-up or refuses to take off his own shoes but is perfectly capable of doing so. It's a way to get Mom time. It's a way to delay the inevitable goodbye. I personally think that long drop-offs and pick-ups are extremely disruptive and I do everything I can to make sure they don't happen.

As a home daycare provider, I would consider offering a nursing space for a mom with a very young infant. I'm not saying I would do it, but I would consider it. The mom would have to be very respectful of what's going on the daycare and be sure that her nursing is not a distraction.

I would not provide space for a nursing toddler.

If I were you, I'd be up front with the mom and tell her that the arrangement is no longer working out for you, and that you will need her to nurse her child before/after pick ups and drop offs from now on.
Most of my dcm's nursed for some period of time, and all were offered a place to nurse here, should they need it (when babies were new). Not ONE has ever taken me up on it. Most have at least a 15 minute ride home (up to a half hour), and yet, they all said "he/she can wait". That's with little babies. A 2 year old can certainly wait, and be nursed before arrival. Especially since she's making the OP work EARLIER just for her! Ridiculous!
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_Dana_ 01:27 PM 01-06-2015
I'm also pro-breastfeeding and nursed my children until they were 2.5yo. That being said, I would not provide a space for nursing a toddler. I would simply tell mom and toddler that they can nurse when they get home where they can fully relax and enjoy one another's company without the distractions of the childcare.

When I used to leave my children at child care, we established a routine that my 8yo and 4yo still do to this day. A quick hug, kiss and flashing the American Sign Language sign for "I love you" out the window as I get in the car. It's a simple routine that my children are familiar with.

It's time to start a new drop off and pick up routine with this young family.
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Ariana 06:42 PM 01-06-2015
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child. Is it because it's a breast and how much we as a society sexualized breasts? If she gave her kid a cookie and sat and let him eat it would that be an issue?

Maybe the mom has a long commute and wants to connect before and after daycare? Maybe she doesn't have a supportive partner at home? Who knows!
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Controlled Chaos 06:49 PM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child. Is it because it's a breast and how much we as a society sexualized breasts? If she gave her kid a cookie and sat and let him eat it would that be an issue?

Maybe the mom has a long commute and wants to connect before and after daycare? Maybe she doesn't have a supportive partner at home? Who knows!
My only issue would be if I was getting up early for a drop off that didn't need to be that early if mom nursed at home.
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Ariana 06:54 PM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by Controlled Chaos:
My only issue would be if I was getting up early for a drop off that didn't need to be that early if mom nursed at home.
I see what you mean but it's 15-20 minutes. Chances are it's not actually this long. While she was BFing I'd just go do something else, you are likely going to be up anyway.
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Unregistered 07:01 PM 01-06-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child.
the parent herself is here for sometimes 20 - 40 mins after schedual pick up time and sometimes earlier at drop off , so has been here somedays totaling an hour
I do have an open door policy but not everyday which is starting to happen...mom also wants to chat
so little disruptive to day care ...though I am all for feeding the babies the child is not eating food for the 8 hours here .....
again it is a new client ...so I want to nip this in the bud the social hour a day after pay
plus I agree with the comfort though I think for both ..but if the child is in full time day care they need the independance too there is other ways to comfort ....a faster drop off and faster pick up
I am a family relaxed day care and do visit with parents and take the time to let them see me and where their children spend a lot of time but I dont want it every day ...I have many children in my care and many things to do with them
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Ariana 07:26 PM 01-06-2015
So it seems the issue is the mom hanging around not the breastfeeding? If this is the case then just tell her you would appreciate faster pickups and drop offs. From your original post it sounded like you had a problem with an older child breastfeeding. If that's the case then I would try and figure out why since the World Health Organization, the AAP all recommend BFing a year and beyond. It is a perfectly acceptable way to feed a human. We are just conditioned to think milk from a cow is better.
http://kellymom.com/ages/after12mo/a...he-first-year/


Her child not eating has very little to do with breastfeeding. I am currently breastfeeding my 2 year old twice a day and she eats more than my 5 year old!
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Unregistered 07:55 PM 01-06-2015
I said I might have a problem ...maybe
I am not sure what age is good for a child to not have mothers milk any more
or when they would no longer need it
I " assumed " it was just around 2 yrs old ....not 3 ...which mom had said she would bf to age 3
I would think if getting lots of belly filled with milk the child would not want the food ???

today at pick up when we where out side ...they didnt bf and I did mention faster drop off in am
the child is doing very well for just new here and new day care experience and smart as a whip
so if the child at 2 can still eat much solid food I agree she can wait and do at home
I have many parents and children to concider and interact with at these times , I just had a special needs 10 yr old boy who left at same time they started and well, it would of been very hard on him to see ...and I would of course had to separate them all, if that was happening ....he would of been too focused ...we had a person come to teach him boundries of his and other bodies while he was here ...he would of been giggling and talking about nursing and bobbies all day long ...very sweet boy
they are not my first bf just my oldest and remember she said to 3 years old

and I do not believe in cows milk for humans ....
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Sugaree 08:14 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I said I might have a problem ...maybe
I am not sure what age is good for a child to not have mothers milk any more
or when they would no longer need it
I " assumed " it was just around 2 yrs old ....not 3 ...which mom had said she would bf to age 3
I would think if getting lots of belly filled with milk the child would not want the food ???

today at pick up when we where out side ...they didnt bf and I did mention faster drop off in am
the child is doing very well for just new here and new day care experience and smart as a whip
so if the child at 2 can still eat much solid food I agree she can wait and do at home
I have many parents and children to concider and interact with at these times , I just had a special needs 10 yr old boy who left at same time they started and well, it would of been very hard on him to see ...and I would of course had to separate them all, if that was happening ....he would of been too focused ...we had a person come to teach him boundries of his and other bodies while he was here ...he would of been giggling and talking about nursing and bobbies all day long ...very sweet boy
they are not my first bf just my oldest and remember she said to 3 years old

and I do not believe in cows milk for humans ....
Actually, 2 is the minimum recommedation by the WHO. Three is not unheard of and is, in fact, evolutionarily normal. Remember that most children will self-wean when they are ready and almost all of them do that before their 4th birthday.

After the first birthday, nursing isn't just about sustinance. It's about comfort and immunity. The human immune system isn't fully developed until well into childhood. Breastmilk continues to provide the antibodies that a child needs until that side.

It seems to me that this is less a problem with breastfeeding and more about breastfeeding a toddler. It's up to you whether you provide a nursing space, but please do some research about the benefits of extended breastfeeding before passing judgement. kellymom.com has some great resources.
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daycare 08:27 AM 01-07-2015
While I agree with you 100% on what you are saying, I don't think that anyone is passing judgement on it.

The real issue that I see here is that DCM is getting an additional hour of the providers time each day taking away from running her business and personal time.

A child of this age should have no issues with feeding at home in the morning and then waiting to get home at night.

I have two kids age 2 and 2.5 the moms still nurse, but I don't allow for them to nurse here. I don't have the space or time for it. My program does not take infants, so we did not design it with BF in mind.

Neither of my families have an issue with BF at home and not here.
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_Dana_ 10:12 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by daycare:
While I agree with you 100% on what you are saying, I don't think that anyone is passing judgement on it.

The real issue that I see here is that DCM is getting an additional hour of the providers time each day taking away from running her business and personal time.

A child of this age should have no issues with feeding at home in the morning and then waiting to get home at night.

I have two kids age 2 and 2.5 the moms still nurse, but I don't allow for them to nurse here. I don't have the space or time for it. My program does not take infants, so we did not design it with BF in mind.

Neither of my families have an issue with BF at home and not here.
Yes to all of this, but especially the bolded parts.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:29 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Why does the morning feeding have to occur AT your house? Can't she nurse before dropping off?

Same with the pick up feedings? Why do they have to take place AT your house? At 2 yrs old the child can wait until they get home.

I would NOT entertain that for ANY age child when the feedings can occur BEFORE drop off and AFTER pick up. During the day is a completely different thing but those two particular times are not something I would be okay with as there really doesn't seem to be a reason for it...kwim? not at that age.
ABSOLUTELY!!! ...says the mom still nursing her 16-month-old. You want to do extended breastfeeding? AWESOME! But, you don't HAVE to do it at my place of business/my home. You can wait or do it before arriving.
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Cradle2crayons 10:29 AM 01-07-2015
I agree. Nobody here is passing judgement on the breast feeding. Just the fact it's happening at daycare when it's not needed.

I absolutely require all babies come fed... Before daycare. And a child that age can wait to get home. It has nothing to do with the act of feeding but more to do with them arriving early, staying late, and staying too long each day.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:35 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child. Is it because it's a breast and how much we as a society sexualized breasts? If she gave her kid a cookie and sat and let him eat it would that be an issue?

Maybe the mom has a long commute and wants to connect before and after daycare? Maybe she doesn't have a supportive partner at home? Who knows!
Yes, a cookie would be an issue as well. Any meal/snack would be. I provide all snacks and drinks here...there is no need for a toddler to be consuming anything else here and I have even written that into my handbook.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:37 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I said I might have a problem ...maybe
I am not sure what age is good for a child to not have mothers milk any more
or when they would no longer need it
I " assumed " it was just around 2 yrs old ....not 3 ...which mom had said she would bf to age 3
I would think if getting lots of belly filled with milk the child would not want the food ???

today at pick up when we where out side ...they didnt bf and I did mention faster drop off in am
the child is doing very well for just new here and new day care experience and smart as a whip
so if the child at 2 can still eat much solid food I agree she can wait and do at home
I have many parents and children to concider and interact with at these times , I just had a special needs 10 yr old boy who left at same time they started and well, it would of been very hard on him to see ...and I would of course had to separate them all, if that was happening ....he would of been too focused ...we had a person come to teach him boundries of his and other bodies while he was here ...he would of been giggling and talking about nursing and bobbies all day long ...very sweet boy
they are not my first bf just my oldest and remember she said to 3 years old

and I do not believe in cows milk for humans ....
Honey, you insisting she not nurse her toddler on your property has NOTHING to do with weaning. I only nurse my toddler during business hours ONE time. She still gets two other nursing sessions outside of work (early morning before kids arrive and before bedtime). She can still get a lot of mama milk time by tweaking her schedule a mere 15-30 minutes.

Oh, and they have shown how beneficial human milk is for children from birth on up. It doesn't stop providing wonderful things after they turn 1, 2, 3...so you don't even need to make the call on when she should wean her child. You just need to decide what you want to do as far as having mom nurse her toddler right at drop off and right at pick up on your property when you could be having your work day start later and end earlier.
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Blackcat31 10:49 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
Yes, a cookie would be an issue as well. Any meal/snack would be. I provide all snacks and drinks here...there is no need for a toddler to be consuming anything else here and I have even written that into my handbook.
ECS~ You are the first breastfeeding mama, I have ever had the pleasure of knowing that doesn't automatically get defensive about nursing/BF'ing issues when they are mentioned.

Just because a provider has an issue with a parent being at her house early or later than they need to be, doesn't automatically mean the provider is anti-breastfeeding.

I FULY support breast feeding moms....I don't care if they do it until the child graduates from college....just don't make it something that affects MY program and/or the needs of the other kids in care.

I am GROUP care, that means I need to do what works best for the group verses one child.

I am a self-employed business owner, that means I need to run my program in a manner that works for ME, verses what works for one parent.

This situation has zero to do with nursing, breast feeding or extended nursing....it is about the time and space the parent is using that belongs to the provider.
It's that simple.
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lovemykidstoo 10:50 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a problem ...maybe
I have a very new client that has a early am start
she comes and sits and breast feeds for 10-20 min ..no one else is here
then at pickup comes at pick up time and sits and breast feeds again
for 15 mins or more
the child is "2" in Feb
I asked yesterday ..how long does she plan to BF ..she stated an other year
so .....I have a plan
I will do my best to feed this child as much as possible during the day
and at pick up I will do my best to be busy and not availible to visit and have the gang busy in an other room
she is a lovely young mom and is open to ideas and learning ..which is great
and I know it is a personal choice of how long one bf .....but
I feel this one might confuse the rest of my gang and she often ( the child ) will stand on the floor while mom on couch and feed ...
and I am not sure how I feel about a 2 1/2 year old breast feeding
I'm just curious and that's all it is, but is this a normal setup for a child of this age to BF with the child standing and the mom sitting on the couch?

It boils down to the time that the mom is there with her child. Just as none (or most) of us would not allow a child to bring a snack in, gum, candy, toys, etc, this is the same thing. It does not change anything because it's breast feeding.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:55 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
ECS~ You are the first breastfeeding mama, I have ever had the pleasure of knowing that doesn't automatically get defensive about nursing/BF'ing issues when they are mentioned.

Just because a provider has an issue with a parent being at her house early or later than they need to be, doesn't automatically mean the provider is anti-breastfeeding.

I FULY support breast feeding moms....I don't care if they do it until the child graduates from college....just don't make it something that affects MY program and/or the needs of the other kids in care.

I am GROUP care, that means I need to do what works best for the group verses one child.

I am a self-employed business owner, that means I need to run my program in a manner that works for ME, verses what works for one parent.

This situation has zero to do with nursing, breast feeding or extended nursing....it is about the time and space the parent is using that belongs to the provider.
It's that simple
.
That is so kind, thank you. It really is an issue about time and space.
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sharlan 11:01 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child. Is it because it's a breast and how much we as a society sexualized breasts? If she gave her kid a cookie and sat and let him eat it would that be an issue?
Maybe the mom has a long commute and wants to connect before and after daycare? Maybe she doesn't have a supportive partner at home? Who knows!
Yes, it would be an issue for me. Mom and child can reconnect at home.

I have had many bf'ing moms over the years. I don't have a problem with an infant being nursed before the ride home. Once the child is able to eat, he/she can wait until they get home.

I like my parents to come in and make a quick drop off in the morning. I also appreciate a quick pick up in the evenings.
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Play Care 11:02 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Sugaree:
Actually, 2 is the minimum recommedation by the WHO. Three is not unheard of and is, in fact, evolutionarily normal. Remember that most children will self-wean when they are ready and almost all of them do that before their 4th birthday.

After the first birthday, nursing isn't just about sustinance. It's about comfort and immunity. The human immune system isn't fully developed until well into childhood. Breastmilk continues to provide the antibodies that a child needs until that side.

It seems to me that this is less a problem with breastfeeding and more about breastfeeding a toddler. It's up to you whether you provide a nursing space, but please do some research about the benefits of extended breastfeeding before passing judgement. kellymom.com has some great resources.

The WHO recommendations are in place because in many areas of the world water and food supplies are not up to standard. Better for a mother in Africa to breastfeed her 3 yo so he's getting *something* in his belly...
In addition there have been recent studies on breastfeeding that show its not the panacea motheringdotcom and the like would have you believe in terms of immunity. I am NOT saying that breastfeeding isn't wonderful. It is, I've done it twice but it's no magic wand.
Regardless of the op's personal feelings, there is NO reason for a toddler to be nursed at day care *especially* if the provider is expected to open early and close late for it. Just as I wouldn't allow a mom to come early to bottle feed her 2 year old...
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:05 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
The WHO recommendations are in place because in many areas of the world water and food supplies are not up to standard. Better for a mother in Africa to breastfeed her 3 yo so he's getting *something* in his belly...
In addition there have been recent studies on breastfeeding that show its not the panacea motheringdotcom and the like would have you believe in terms of immunity. I am NOT saying that breastfeeding isn't wonderful. It is, I've done it twice but it's no magic wand.
Regardless of the op's personal feelings, there is NO reason for a toddler to be nursed at day care *especially* if the provider is expected to open early and close late for it. Just as I wouldn't allow a mom to come early to bottle feed her 2 year old...
That's interesting! I figured the immunity thing as my daughter catches many a cold despite the "liquid gold" in her diet.
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Play Care 11:18 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
That's interesting! I figured the immunity thing as my daughter catches many a cold despite the "liquid gold" in her diet.
I have two kids - one who was exclusively breastfed and the other who had a mix of EBM/formal (cause the hussy wouldn't latch!! ) the one who started out with EBM but eventually switched to formula has never had an ear infection, allergy, serious cold, etc. the exclusively breast fed child has asthma, allergies, ear infections, etc
My one neighbor is a LLL leader and has extended bf all her kids - all three have had major ear infections, tubes etc. the oldest is grossly overweight.
Most of my neighbors breast fed, and our kids are all...normal kids (No superheroes or geniuses among them )
Anecdotal to be sure, but shouldnt be dismissed on that alone

I think the new line of thought is that it's more the interaction with baby (because parents who breastfeed are more likely to be highly educated) rather than the actual milk that leads to optimal results for breast fed babies.
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Shell 11:22 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
ECS~ You are the first breastfeeding mama, I have ever had the pleasure of knowing that doesn't automatically get defensive about nursing/BF'ing issues when they are mentioned.

Just because a provider has an issue with a parent being at her house early or later than they need to be, doesn't automatically mean the provider is anti-breastfeeding.

I FULY support breast feeding moms....I don't care if they do it until the child graduates from college....just don't make it something that affects MY program and/or the needs of the other kids in care.

I am GROUP care, that means I need to do what works best for the group verses one child.

I am a self-employed business owner, that means I need to run my program in a manner that works for ME, verses what works for one parent.

This situation has zero to do with nursing, breast feeding or extended nursing....it is about the time and space the parent is using that belongs to the provider.
It's that simple.

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Sugaree 11:23 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
The WHO recommendations are in place because in many areas of the world water and food supplies are not up to standard. Better for a mother in Africa to breastfeed her 3 yo so he's getting *something* in his belly...
In addition there have been recent studies on breastfeeding that show its not the panacea motheringdotcom and the like would have you believe in terms of immunity. I am NOT saying that breastfeeding isn't wonderful. It is, I've done it twice but it's no magic wand.
Regardless of the op's personal feelings, there is NO reason for a toddler to be nursed at day care *especially* if the provider is expected to open early and close late for it. Just as I wouldn't allow a mom to come early to bottle feed her 2 year old...

I said that it's her choice to provide an area or not. If she doesn't want to then great. Trust me, after a long day at work I'd much rather hang out at home than in a nursing lounge or at anyone else's house either. What concerns me are some of the statements the OP made like

Originally Posted by :
and I am not sure how I feel about a 2 1/2 year old breast feeding
and

Originally Posted by :
I myself feel it is a comfort thing ...mainly for the mom ...
and

Originally Posted by :
and I asked if the dg was getting any to eat from mom
she said yes
I giggled and said " now that is why she wont eat anything here "
and

Originally Posted by :
I said I might have a problem ...maybe

There's just something about it that rubs me the wrong way. I'm really trying not to be defensive about it, and I recognize that a lot of my reaction is based on the kinds of remarks I get for nursing an 18 month-old in an area where breastfeeding past 6 months is very rare.
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Blackcat31 11:36 AM 01-07-2015
Sugaree.... this is directed to you....

Have you considered registering for the forum?

You have had a lot of valuable input and another perspective here is always welcome!

There are also "perks" to being registered such as access to community groups, PM'ing abilities and access to the Off Topic and Private Area (after a set length of time and # of posts) as well as being able to access any of the attachments posted.

Just a thought...since I see you posting regularly.
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Sugaree 11:40 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Sugaree.... this is directed to you....

Have you considered registering for the forum?

You have had a lot of valuable input and another perspective here is always welcome!

There are also "perks" to being registered such as access to community groups, PM'ing abilities and access to the Off Topic and Private Area (after a set length of time and # of posts) as well as being able to access any of the attachments posted.

Just a thought...since I see you posting regularly.

You got me. I stumbled on this group when I was researching ways to stop my kid from biting. But I'm finding a lot of good advice on other things, so I stuck around.
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preschoolteacher 11:41 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would welcome any parent at any time to come and breastfeed their baby. Maybe I am weird but I have zero issues with it and would be very supportive and I would not care if others saw it including the kids in my care. I am really not sure what the issue is?! She is providing comfort to her child. Is it because it's a breast and how much we as a society sexualized breasts? If she gave her kid a cookie and sat and let him eat it would that be an issue?

Maybe the mom has a long commute and wants to connect before and after daycare? Maybe she doesn't have a supportive partner at home? Who knows!
I have zero problems with breastfeeding. I personally nursed a toddler. I think it's great! I DO have a problem with extended drop off and pick ups, for whatever reason, because they are si disruptive.
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Blackcat31 11:44 AM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Sugaree:
You got me. I stumbled on this group when I was researching ways to stop my kid from biting. But I'm finding a lot of good advice on other things, so I stuck around.


Glad to have you!!!
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mamamanda 12:01 PM 01-07-2015
Boy, the breastfeeding questions always stir up quite a bit of debate. haha Thought I'd add my two cents. I am both a pro-breastfeeding mama and a child care provider and the two can work together, but I agree with several other posters that it doesn't need to take place at someone else's home daycare. I nursed my son until he was 2 and a half and the benefits have been very real for my family. I am now nursing my infant and will continue to do so for quite some time. That being said, I still wouldn't want a breastfeeding mama nursing during drop off or pick up at our home simply because of the disruption to my schedule. It has nothing to do with breastfeeding. I would encourage all mamas to nurse their toddlers, just not during my busy times of day. There has been a lot of research done though that shows some childhood diseases are almost unheard of among children who were exclusively breastfed. That doesn't mean breast fed kids don't get sick. There are so many other factors that come into play, environmental factors, what the mom eats, allergies, hereditary conditions etc. But there is a protection provided through breastmilk that is not found elsewhere. There are some studies in the works that are exploring the anti-cancer properties of human milk and regardless of where you live in the world, that is a wonderful gift to give a baby, toddler, or even a young preschooler. Also, I've found that when the children in my care get sick my children consistently fight it off within about 2 days where as the other kids are often sick 7-10 days so just because a bf child catches something or gets an ear infection doesn't mean the breastmilk didn't help the severity of the condition. So my opinion: Definitely feel free to nurse your 3 year old, just don't interrupt my daily routine. It can wait until you get home.
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Unregistered 01:24 PM 01-07-2015
I am back
thank you for all the input
knowledge is power
the more we learn the better we can be as care givers and people

the one thing we must remember when communicating on a forum or texting ex
is that the tones, the meanings and questions are not always taken the way they where meant by the typer ....this I am teaching my 15 yr daughter ....who I nusrsed ..we weaned each other when she was about 1 1/2
and went to a cup .....so I truley did not know how long some people nursed

I do know that some people are not comfortable being around a nursing mother and some mothers will cover themselves even in a room full or woman and children and some will bare all around any one ...in this bussiness we have many types of poeple and we try to blend or centres and homes to accomidate every one and ourselves and the " business "
so yah didnt know if I had a problem or not ...I have men that also pick up their children and well may feel uncomfortable seeing a toddler standing on the floor feeding ...the older feeder may confuse the older children ex...........not all my children are angels
the comfort thing for the mom is remember this is also her first time leaving child with some one not family and first day care experience and I could tell she was not sure of it all
so with that said and being my nature I would never ever try to make her feel uncomfortable or worried about her child or uncertain...... and we have with all your input and my expeirence made some changes fast
yesterday at pick we where out side so they stayed a few mins and left no nursing and this morn ( I mentioned faster drop off last night ) she again just a few mins no sitting or nursing and my little child ate alot this am ...both mother and child doing great !!
thank you every one and PS wheres the spell check ????
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TheGoodLife 01:40 PM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I am back
thank you for all the input
knowledge is power
the more we learn the better we can be as care givers and people

the one thing we must remember when communicating on a forum or texting ex
is that the tones, the meanings and questions are not always taken the way they where meant by the typer ....this I am teaching my 15 yr daughter ....who I nusrsed ..we weaned each other when she was about 1 1/2
and went to a cup .....so I truley did not know how long some people nursed

I do know that some people are not comfortable being around a nursing mother and some mothers will cover themselves even in a room full or woman and children and some will bare all around any one ...in this bussiness we have many types of poeple and we try to blend or centres and homes to accomidate every one and ourselves and the " business "
so yah didnt know if I had a problem or not ...I have men that also pick up their children and well may feel uncomfortable seeing a toddler standing on the floor feeding ...the older feeder may confuse the older children ex...........not all my children are angels
the comfort thing for the mom is remember this is also her first time leaving child with some one not family and first day care experience and I could tell she was not sure of it all
so with that said and being my nature I would never ever try to make her feel uncomfortable or worried about her child or uncertain...... and we have with all your input and my expeirence made some changes fast
yesterday at pick we where out side so they stayed a few mins and left no nursing and this morn ( I mentioned faster drop off last night ) she again just a few mins no sitting or nursing and my little child ate alot this am ...both mother and child doing great !!
thank you every one and PS wheres the spell check ????
Good for you! And yes, written word is often taken/read wrong. I'm glad you had a good day and I hope it continues smoothly for you all
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wonderfullisa 02:12 PM 01-07-2015
Someone asked if the child standing while the mom sat was a normal position.

First, I would say that there is no 'normal', per se.
However, for me, it would not be. A child who is standing is in a prime position to take a step away, or turn, or twist, and I REALLY try to limit that. My nipples only stretch so far.

Also wanted to throw a little more pro-breastfeeding but anti people hanging out at my house off of the clock. I breastfed til 33m and then a couple weeks shy of 4 years. And the four year old was only cut off because I'm pregnant and it was starting to really hurt me.

I will also fully admit that I skimmed towards the bottom, but wanted to say that when/if you talk to the mom about it (or other people who read this later), focus on the hours issue, not the breastfeeding. As we have already covered, some people can easily get defensive about breastfeeding. Be clear that the root of the issue is the time she's spending there outside of her contracted hours.
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Crazy8 05:22 PM 01-07-2015
I wouldn't care if the mom was breastfeeding, bottle feeding, spoon feeding a bowl of cereal or sitting to watch them eat a cookie…. none of that needs to happen at my house on MY time. Especially if its before my opening and after my closing times!!! I'd be charging by the minute for a parent to be in my house after closing for ANY reason.

Even an infant's feedings can be scheduled outside the daycare hours, a 2 year old absolutely can wait to get home for their "feeding".

I would let them mom know you 100% support her extended breastfeeding but you are not able to accommodate the time she is doing it in your home any longer and she will need to do it at home before arriving and after she gets home in the evenings.
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Leigh 05:45 PM 01-07-2015
Originally Posted by Crazy8:

Even an infant's feedings can be scheduled outside the daycare hours, a 2 year old absolutely can wait to get home for their "feeding".
Exactly. Would you let a formula feeding mom stay and give her child a bottle? ANY child can wait until they get home. I know that **I** make sure that formula or BF kids are fed shortly before pickup so that they can make it home.
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