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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Dads Against Uneducated Moms
dave4him 04:55 PM 08-13-2012
Okay so here is the deal! My wife is off this week inbetween quitting one job and starting the next, so she gets invited to a play group with a bunch of other moms. She hated the experience and here is why. All the other moms were saying how so and so is already sounding out words, reading adult level math, potty trained, blah, blah, blah. Nothing against early learners, we all learn at different ages and stages. But they made her feel like our kids are stupid since they go to public school, or dont do all these other things, or eat only organic foods! UGH it made me so mad. We both work hard to get as much culture and education into our childrens lives as we can, and i wonder how many of those kids there had dads who spend half the time with their kids as i do. Anyway just had to vent. I know its not all parents think like that, but still was annoying
Heidi 05:00 PM 08-13-2012
lol...love your title line....
Your local version of Dance Moms?
Whatever, you do what is best for your children. Try not to raise them in a box, but yeah, they'll be ok without knowing Calculus at 6, or how to make Foui Gras..or even spell it...lol
Your local version of Dance Moms?
Whatever, you do what is best for your children. Try not to raise them in a box, but yeah, they'll be ok without knowing Calculus at 6, or how to make Foui Gras..or even spell it...lol
Heidi 05:01 PM 08-13-2012
that's foie gras....
Nickel 06:38 PM 08-13-2012
Oh I hate play groups... I think the moms spend more time talking to each other than watching their children. I think it's a bit ridiculuous. Like a bunch of hens squaking. You couldn't drag me. Yuck!
And yes, they are so apt at telling everyone how great their child is, but what they don't tell you is all the stuff the children aren't doing (liking writing on the walls with feces. teeheeheee) Children develop at their own rate and there isn't anything wrong with public school. I can't stand catty women
And yes, they are so apt at telling everyone how great their child is, but what they don't tell you is all the stuff the children aren't doing (liking writing on the walls with feces. teeheeheee) Children develop at their own rate and there isn't anything wrong with public school. I can't stand catty women
dave4him 06:40 PM 08-13-2012
Well as a dad i am not invited to playgroups much. Which is actually part of the reason i started my daycare. I figure this way i can get paid for my children to get some social time with other kids around. 
My wife knows just from watching our three by herself on the weekends while i am at work, that its a LOT of work im blessed to be able to be at home with them while she works even though i know she wishes she didnt have to sometimes.
My wife knows just from watching our three by herself on the weekends while i am at work, that its a LOT of work
im blessed to be able to be at home with them while she works even though i know she wishes she didnt have to sometimes.
AmyLeigh 07:13 PM 08-13-2012
What's interesting is the fact that early readers show no advantage over their late bloomer peers by high school. And many gifted people get burned out early so they drop out of high school, let alone go to Ivy League colleges. So it's not always a sign of good parenting to push these little ones.
People like these parents that brag about things like this lack true self esteem. Don't tell me what you (or Junior) can do, show me who you are.
People like these parents that brag about things like this lack true self esteem. Don't tell me what you (or Junior) can do, show me who you are.
Oneluckymom 07:18 PM 08-13-2012
I have always steered clear of play groups in my area. The moms are VERY "clickish" and competitive with their kids. I wanted no part of it.
Meeko 07:01 AM 08-14-2012
Play groups like that are so cringe worthy!
They all talk to each other like they're BFF's forever (while constantly trying to out-do each other with their incredible parenting skills
) and yet will backbite the mother who isn't there any chance they get. Ugh!
They all talk to each other like they're BFF's forever (while constantly trying to out-do each other with their incredible parenting skills
) and yet will backbite the mother who isn't there any chance they get. Ugh!
Country Kids 07:05 AM 08-14-2012
I didn't have this issue with playgroups but homeschool moms when we homeschooled. It was always like a competition of who was doing what and who could cram the most into their schedules! I loved homeschooling but always felt I wasn't the "perfect" mom.
Also, some of my children attended public school during our homeschooling time and wow that was a big no,no and did people judge you on that!
Also, some of my children attended public school during our homeschooling time and wow that was a big no,no and did people judge you on that!
Blackcat31 07:09 AM 08-14-2012
TRANSLATIONS:
sounding out words = made goo goo sounds and mom swears it sounded EXACTLY like little Johnny utter the first three lines to Macbeth
reading adult level math, = mom asked "how big is Johnny?" and he held up BOTH arms! Whoo hooo working in double digits!!!!
potty trained = Mom held little Johnny over the toilet and on the 15th time, he actually urinated in the toilet!
LOVE moms like those ones......Makes me glad they choose to stay at home and not bring little Johnny to me.
sounding out words = made goo goo sounds and mom swears it sounded EXACTLY like little Johnny utter the first three lines to Macbeth
reading adult level math, = mom asked "how big is Johnny?" and he held up BOTH arms! Whoo hooo working in double digits!!!!
potty trained = Mom held little Johnny over the toilet and on the 15th time, he actually urinated in the toilet!
LOVE moms like those ones......Makes me glad they choose to stay at home and not bring little Johnny to me.
JustAMom 07:33 AM 08-14-2012
Maybe I'm wrong, but I think this is at least partly the result of moms who quit their jobs to stay home with their kids and now feel that, since they made that sacrifice, they need to be the perfect parent. They need to have the absolute perfect children in order to show that their sacrifices are worthwhile.
Zoe 07:38 AM 08-14-2012
A good friend of mine turned into that kind of mother. I hated the feeling I would get on our playdates....for example her baby started walking at 9 months and she would say things like "oh don't worry, your ds will walk eventually." Little barbs like that would add up and I found myself trying to catch up.
Well then I figured out that just because her little precious was a little more advanced physically he also pushed, bit, threw fits to get what he wanted, didn't go to bed until 10pm, etc and he was still "more perfect" than any other child. Whatever. Kinda ruined the relationship with that woman. Don't miss that!
Well then I figured out that just because her little precious was a little more advanced physically he also pushed, bit, threw fits to get what he wanted, didn't go to bed until 10pm, etc and he was still "more perfect" than any other child. Whatever. Kinda ruined the relationship with that woman. Don't miss that!
daycarediva 09:41 AM 08-14-2012
Working in daycare you know it's mostly BS anyway.
I enrolled a kid at 2 1/2 who was potty trained-with occasional accidents, that knew his colors, shapes, numbers and letters, that napped fantastic and was kind and polite to other kids.
almost 2 years later, it's true!
I enrolled a kid at 2 1/2 who was potty trained-with occasional accidents, that knew his colors, shapes, numbers and letters, that napped fantastic and was kind and polite to other kids.
almost 2 years later, it's true!
AfterSchoolMom 10:20 AM 08-14-2012
I'm sorry your wife was subjected to that. I HATE cliquish groups of women. Just wanted to say, though, that not all playgroups are that way. I was involved in a great one - no one was catty at all, and I'm still good friends with a lot of the women (and my kids with their kids) today. Also, we had a stay-at-home Dad in our group and very much enjoyed his involvement - he always had a different outlook on things that added a lot to our conversations.
Kaddidle Care 02:36 PM 08-14-2012
Cliquey parents have cliquey kids. Move on McDuff! 
I've found some great friends when my kids used to attend the Storytime at the Library. One is still my friend some 15+ years later!
Please tell her to find people that have more than one child. It's usually the first time Moms that compare every little thing with their children.
Once you have more children you tend to compare your own kids for milestones and such. (And then realize how very different they are!)
I've found some great friends when my kids used to attend the Storytime at the Library. One is still my friend some 15+ years later!
Please tell her to find people that have more than one child. It's usually the first time Moms that compare every little thing with their children.
Once you have more children you tend to compare your own kids for milestones and such. (And then realize how very different they are!)
Nickel 05:10 PM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
TRANSLATIONS:
sounding out words = made goo goo sounds and mom swears it sounded EXACTLY like little Johnny utter the first three lines to Macbeth
reading adult level math, = mom asked "how big is Johnny?" and he held up BOTH arms! Whoo hooo working in double digits!!!!
potty trained = Mom held little Johnny over the toilet and on the 15th time, he actually urinated in the toilet!
LOVE moms like those ones......Makes me glad they choose to stay at home and not bring little Johnny to me.
TRANSLATIONS:
sounding out words = made goo goo sounds and mom swears it sounded EXACTLY like little Johnny utter the first three lines to Macbeth
reading adult level math, = mom asked "how big is Johnny?" and he held up BOTH arms! Whoo hooo working in double digits!!!!
potty trained = Mom held little Johnny over the toilet and on the 15th time, he actually urinated in the toilet!
LOVE moms like those ones......Makes me glad they choose to stay at home and not bring little Johnny to me.
Had to laugh at this 
saved4always 05:22 PM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by dave4him:
Okay so here is the deal! My wife is off this week inbetween quitting one job and starting the next, so she gets invited to a play group with a bunch of other moms. She hated the experience and here is why. All the other moms were saying how so and so is already sounding out words, reading adult level math, potty trained, blah, blah, blah. Nothing against early learners, we all learn at different ages and stages. But they made her feel like our kids are stupid since they go to public school, or dont do all these other things, or eat only organic foods! UGH it made me so mad. We both work hard to get as much culture and education into our childrens lives as we can, and i wonder how many of those kids there had dads who spend half the time with their kids as i do. Anyway just had to vent. I know its not all parents think like that, but still was annoying
How totally annoying. Okay so here is the deal! My wife is off this week inbetween quitting one job and starting the next, so she gets invited to a play group with a bunch of other moms. She hated the experience and here is why. All the other moms were saying how so and so is already sounding out words, reading adult level math, potty trained, blah, blah, blah. Nothing against early learners, we all learn at different ages and stages. But they made her feel like our kids are stupid since they go to public school, or dont do all these other things, or eat only organic foods! UGH it made me so mad. We both work hard to get as much culture and education into our childrens lives as we can, and i wonder how many of those kids there had dads who spend half the time with their kids as i do. Anyway just had to vent. I know its not all parents think like that, but still was annoying
Some moms love to brag and compare. Just ignore them. Your kids are going to be so much better off from all of the positive attention they are getting from thier Dad than they ever will from all this "early" learning. My kids go to public school and have done just fine. They have a very involved father and the 2 older ones have been the best teen boys I could ever have wanted (17 and 19 yo now). Our 10 yo will hopefully follow in their footsteps. Your kids will benefit thier whole lives from the time you are spending with them now.
Crystal 05:30 PM 08-14-2012
Not cool. Probably one of the reasons most of my friends have been male throughout my life.
Curious how the thread title relates to the topic though? Seems odd
Curious how the thread title relates to the topic though? Seems odd
Michelle 05:58 PM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by JustAMom:
Maybe I'm wrong, but I think this is at least partly the result of moms who quit their jobs to stay home with their kids and now feel that, since they made that sacrifice, they need to be the perfect parent. They need to have the absolute perfect children in order to show that their sacrifices are worthwhile.
very insightful! Maybe I'm wrong, but I think this is at least partly the result of moms who quit their jobs to stay home with their kids and now feel that, since they made that sacrifice, they need to be the perfect parent. They need to have the absolute perfect children in order to show that their sacrifices are worthwhile.
Springdaze 12:44 PM 08-15-2012
I know what you mean, but it all evens out in the end. whats important to me, and judging from your name and verse, to you also, is that my children love God and others. They will learn academics from school, and of course home, but it is more important for my children to serve God throught the talents He has given them. Besides, I would be up all night every night feeling sorry for my kids that I couldnt give them the best of everything if I let it bother me.