Daycare.com Forum Daycare Forum

Go Back   Daycare.com Forum > Main Category > Daycare Center and Family Home Forum

Daycare Center and Family Home Forum Daycare Center and Family Home owners, Directors, Operators and Assistants should post and ask questions here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 06-01-2011, 04:40 PM
momma4many's Avatar
momma4many momma4many is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: In a cute little house
Posts: 80
Default Cio

Just wondering if anyone has advice on the cry it out method. I have been doing this for a few weeks and it seems to be getting WORSE with the no sleeping around here. Both kids are rocked to sleep at home, but parents understand that they will have to cio here. I have been doing the 5 min, go in and comfort (not pick up) then 7 min, 10 min, 15 min, etc. Neither of them sleep....ever. I'm about losing it. My newest dcb has only been here 1 week, but I swear they keep each other up crying. They are the same age, around 13/14 months. Any suggestions? A friend (who is a nurse) said to just let them cry, that it sounds like going in there is making it worse, but I feel bad doing that. How long do you leave them in there for? What are your methods?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 06-01-2011, 04:44 PM
Live and Learn's Avatar
Live and Learn Live and Learn is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Paradise :-)
Posts: 959
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by momma4many View Post
Just wondering if anyone has advice on the cry it out method. I have been doing this for a few weeks and it seems to be getting WORSE with the no sleeping around here. Both kids are rocked to sleep at home, but parents understand that they will have to cio here. I have been doing the 5 min, go in and comfort (not pick up) then 7 min, 10 min, 15 min, etc. Neither of them sleep....ever. I'm about losing it. My newest dcb has only been here 1 week, but I swear they keep each other up crying. They are the same age, around 13/14 months. Any suggestions? A friend (who is a nurse) said to just let them cry, that it sounds like going in there is making it worse, but I feel bad doing that. How long do you leave them in there for? What are your methods?
I agree with the nurse friend.
It is worth it in the end for both you and the child.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 06-01-2011, 04:58 PM
Zoe's Avatar
Zoe Zoe is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,442
Default

I did it with both my kids. It was really hard for me to hear them cry for so long. But once they figured it out, everyone was so much happier! Keep at it!
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 06-01-2011, 05:32 PM
youretooloud's Avatar
youretooloud youretooloud is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: The desert.
Posts: 1,956
Default

Going in there is probably making it worse... they know you'll come in there and they are holding out for that.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 06-01-2011, 05:36 PM
cheerfuldom's Avatar
cheerfuldom cheerfuldom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 7,414
Default

At over a year, I would just put them down for nap same time every day. No rocking but we do use white noise, darkened room. No checking on them unless you can do so without them knowing. Separate them and let them cry. Try it for at least a week and see what happens. Right now they are not sleeping and are not happy with what you are doing so its worth a shot. This works for me and we don't have nap issues here, even with the babies.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 06-01-2011, 07:07 PM
momma4many's Avatar
momma4many momma4many is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: In a cute little house
Posts: 80
Default

Thanks ladies! I'm going to do it. Just lay them down and let them cry. I need that time for my sanity!!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 06-01-2011, 07:19 PM
MommyMuffin's Avatar
MommyMuffin MommyMuffin is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 887
Default

I have the WORST sleepers at my home!! I have tried everything. It is really hard for me to let them CIO. I have tried it and it seemed to work for my kids over 12 months. Its hard for me to do CIO because I feel like a failure that I can't get them to sleep.

I have a high needs baby and he will only sleep in a pnp in my living room, where I am. If he can see me, he is okay.

Its so hard because each child is so different.

Also, if you can, the ones who have trouble sleeping try to put them in rooms alone. Sometimes that has really helped.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 06-01-2011, 07:46 PM
Sunshine44's Avatar
Sunshine44 Sunshine44 is offline
Running away from home
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 280
Default

I'd stop going in. They are old enough in my opinion to cry it out. I do it with my kids younger than that. If you start putting them in bed and just letting them cry and not going in to check on them...they may fall asleep.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 06-01-2011, 08:35 PM
Mom_of_two's Avatar
Mom_of_two Mom_of_two is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 194
Default

I agree- let them cry! It is what I do. Over a year it seems to be the only way. In two weeks if you are consistent it will be a world of difference!! now when one of mine cries I know something else is going on (teething etc) and I treat accordingly, but that first 2 weeks, cio for sure!
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 06-01-2011, 08:36 PM
cheerfuldom's Avatar
cheerfuldom cheerfuldom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 7,414
Default

oh yay, I never let kids CIO with someone else in the room (another kid I mean). It is harder when you have limited space though.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 06-02-2011, 06:40 AM
daysofelijah's Avatar
daysofelijah daysofelijah is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 286
Default

Stop going in. They are old enough to figure it out. If you have to peek in every 15 minutes, but try not to let them see you. They will tire out and go to sleep eventually. It may take an hour or more of crying the first few times, but it will lessen as they get the point that it is sleep time and you are not going to come get them until sleep time is over.

Once they fall asleep they may wake up again and start crying after 20-30 minutes, just peek and make sure they are okay and let them cry again until they go back to sleep. For some reason, I have had a lot of kids that age that do the 20 minute sleep, wake up and cry for 5 minutes, then go back to sleep for 1-2 hours.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 06-02-2011, 03:17 PM
momma4many's Avatar
momma4many momma4many is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: In a cute little house
Posts: 80
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by daysofelijah View Post
Once they fall asleep they may wake up again and start crying after 20-30 minutes, just peek and make sure they are okay and let them cry again until they go back to sleep. For some reason, I have had a lot of kids that age that do the 20 minute sleep, wake up and cry for 5 minutes, then go back to sleep for 1-2 hours.
Yes, they are at the point where they may sleep for 10-20 min, but no more than that. The screaming, whining, crying all afternoon is getting to me. My nerves are absolutely shot.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 06-02-2011, 03:58 PM
nannyde's Avatar
nannyde nannyde is offline
All powerful, all knowing daycare whisperer
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Des Moines
Posts: 7,311
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by momma4many View Post
My nerves are absolutely shot.
It's time to think about YOU and what YOU need. Once you know they have had good food, good play, good lovins, clean diaper, comfortable place to sleep in a climate controlled environment... then you KNOW you have done what they NEED.

The only way to get them on a schedule is to put them on a schedule. They would take a 1.5 hour nap in the a.m. and a 2.5 hour break in the p.m. whether they slept or not.

They are one year olds. They don't know what's best for themselves. YOU DO. What's best for them is that their provider feels happy, entergetic, and rested between their play and eating times.

Put them down for their breaks on a schedule every day and don't take them out unless you have to change a poopy diaper. Make the room pitch black dark. I would put them in together BECAUSE I would want them to learn how to take their break in the worst possible noise scenario. Being with each other is the worst case scenario.

I would want them to be able to sleep thru ANY kind of noise. The hardest noise to sleep thru is a crying child. So that's where they would be... with the other crying child.

Our society has been hoodwinked into thinking that it's harmful to babies and toddlers to have them cry when they are unhappy. It's not. Once they pass the newborn stage the value of a scheduled sleep routine is worth the crying they do in protest of the routine.

One of your clearest signs of a child who is disorganized and frentic is the child who does 20 minute naps. It's a clear indicator that they aren't getting good deep sleep. It's harder on their brains and system to go day after day without good deep long sleep than it is to go thru a couple of weeks of crying in protest until they learn to RELAX and let nature do it's thing.

When you allow THEM to decide their schedule you get babies just like the ones you have in your house. It's toxic to the babies and it's VERY toxic to the adults caring for the child.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 06-02-2011, 07:01 PM
SandeeAR's Avatar
SandeeAR SandeeAR is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 1,188
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
It's time to think about YOU and what YOU need. Once you know they have had good food, good play, good lovins, clean diaper, comfortable place to sleep in a climate controlled environment... then you KNOW you have done what they NEED.

The only way to get them on a schedule is to put them on a schedule. They would take a 1.5 hour nap in the a.m. and a 2.5 hour break in the p.m. whether they slept or not.

They are one year olds. They don't know what's best for themselves. YOU DO. What's best for them is that their provider feels happy, entergetic, and rested between their play and eating times.

Put them down for their breaks on a schedule every day and don't take them out unless you have to change a poopy diaper. Make the room pitch black dark. I would put them in together BECAUSE I would want them to learn how to take their break in the worst possible noise scenario. Being with each other is the worst case scenario.

I would want them to be able to sleep thru ANY kind of noise. The hardest noise to sleep thru is a crying child. So that's where they would be... with the other crying child.

Our society has been hoodwinked into thinking that it's harmful to babies and toddlers to have them cry when they are unhappy. It's not. Once they pass the newborn stage the value of a scheduled sleep routine is worth the crying they do in protest of the routine.

One of your clearest signs of a child who is disorganized and frentic is the child who does 20 minute naps. It's a clear indicator that they aren't getting good deep sleep. It's harder on their brains and system to go day after day without good deep long sleep than it is to go thru a couple of weeks of crying in protest until they learn to RELAX and let nature do it's thing.

When you allow THEM to decide their schedule you get babies just like the ones you have in your house. It's toxic to the babies and it's VERY toxic to the adults caring for the child.

I totally agree. I have a 14 mo old, that has cried at nap almost every day of her life. She does this at home too. After she was past newborn, we did the CIO, Mom was a little later getting on board with it, so it took a little longer for her to catch on. For MANY months, she would cry for 15 min, sleep 20, cry 10-15, sleep 20, cry 10-15, sleep for an hour.

She still rarely goes to sleep without crying for a few minutes and ALWAYS wakes up crying. It is just her. When she is up, she is a wonderful little girl, no crying.

I have ALWAYS put her down from 9-10 and again from 1-3, each and every day. Even on the days she gets here later and only got up at 8 am. She still goes into her bed.

BTW, she is in a room by herself and I have music playing and room darkening curtains.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 06-02-2011, 08:16 PM
momma4many's Avatar
momma4many momma4many is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: In a cute little house
Posts: 80
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
It's time to think about YOU and what YOU need. Once you know they have had good food, good play, good lovins, clean diaper, comfortable place to sleep in a climate controlled environment... then you KNOW you have done what they NEED.

The only way to get them on a schedule is to put them on a schedule. They would take a 1.5 hour nap in the a.m. and a 2.5 hour break in the p.m. whether they slept or not.

They are one year olds. They don't know what's best for themselves. YOU DO. What's best for them is that their provider feels happy, entergetic, and rested between their play and eating times.

Put them down for their breaks on a schedule every day and don't take them out unless you have to change a poopy diaper. Make the room pitch black dark. I would put them in together BECAUSE I would want them to learn how to take their break in the worst possible noise scenario. Being with each other is the worst case scenario.

I would want them to be able to sleep thru ANY kind of noise. The hardest noise to sleep thru is a crying child. So that's where they would be... with the other crying child.

Our society has been hoodwinked into thinking that it's harmful to babies and toddlers to have them cry when they are unhappy. It's not. Once they pass the newborn stage the value of a scheduled sleep routine is worth the crying they do in protest of the routine.

One of your clearest signs of a child who is disorganized and frentic is the child who does 20 minute naps. It's a clear indicator that they aren't getting good deep sleep. It's harder on their brains and system to go day after day without good deep long sleep than it is to go thru a couple of weeks of crying in protest until they learn to RELAX and let nature do it's thing.

When you allow THEM to decide their schedule you get babies just like the ones you have in your house. It's toxic to the babies and it's VERY toxic to the adults caring for the child.
Wow. Please take this as me giving you a big hug! Thank you for addressing that it is important for the adult caring for the child to be in charge and provide routine as well as be happy themselves. I am going to read this post when I am doubting myself and stick to my routine!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
cio, cry it out, crying

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:15 PM.



Daycare.com         Find A Daycare         List Your Daycare         Toys & Products                 About Us

Daycare.com
Please read our Disclaimer before continuing.

Topics pertain mainly to the following States:

Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware District of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming