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Old 02-20-2011, 07:23 AM
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Default A Day From H**L...But Do I Do It Again? (Long)

A little background:

I wrote about this family before. Back in November I babysat this family of 2 children. Girl was 2 y.o and the baby was 2 months old. We agreed on $12.00 an hour. This was decided even before I worked for them. I was driving a long way and I to put it honestly I needed to make it worth my while. Besides, dad is a cardiologist and mom is a pediatric nurse.

I was to from 6:30 a.m. to 7:30 p.m. LONG DAY. I had no problem with the hours nor the money. Well, the baby was perfect. He is a breastfed baby and she had just started to wean him to a bottle. He was outstanding. The girl was another matter. She was not potty trained. Mom said she was working on it. She didn’t go once for me and she had a bm in her pull up. She does not nap (per mom) and she hardly ate at all for me. By 5 p.m. girl became argumentative and just a plain brat.

Mom came home at 7:45 p.m. Dad was out of town (hence me working). She paid me in cash. I told her about the girls behavior. Mom had a long day as well but didn’t correct her or anything. I told her it was probably because she needed a nap and she didn’t take one. By the way, I did try and put her down: no luck.

Well, about a month later she called again. She called on a Saturday wanting me to working that Sunday. I told her I couldn’t as Sundays were family day but thanks for thinking of me. Hadn't heard from since. However she called me again 2 weeks ago and asked if I could work Saturday the 19th. I told her yes of course.

I get there at 6:30 a.m. baby is up. He is now 5 months old. OMG I could NOT put him down with him screaming on top of his lungs. My left arm is like dead and sore because I had to hold him ALL freaking day. On top of that, the dad got home at 11 a.m. but I had to still work because he was on call.

The one moment I did let him cry the father went in and picked him up! Then he said…”ohh you only cry when someone is not holding you”. Of course I have had demanding babies before. But when I had them in my lap sitting, they were fine. This one wasn’t.

Mom wanted me to nap him upstairs in his room. I told her I felt uncomfortable being that far from him. She said I could nap him in the PNP in their room. Yeah he slept. For 25 freaking minutes. For his next nap I had to hold him. Then he slept an hour and half. I HAD to hold him, otherwise I wouldn’t have had a break. Irony was: the girl was perfect! No nap again but she was outstanding. Plus she was completely potty trained

Father told me at 7:15 p.m. that I could go, mom was on her way home. He paid me. I left. Got to the corner. Counted the money. He shorted me almost $40! I was SO ticked. After that day of pure you know what, then I get shorted!

On the way home I called my husband and told him that I will never watch them again. He agreed. I keep files on all the families I babysit for and I said this family’s file is closed.

Then mom called. She wanted to know about the kids. I told her about Girl and how great. I told her about Boy and how stressful it was. Her reply was: yes he is a little bit spoiled.

She asked me if dad paid. I said yes and told her how much. She was very upset. She said I should have been paid more. I said I am not complaining. She said no you should have been paid more and that she was sorry.

Since she did apologize, I told my husband that I would watch them again (money IS to good to pass up) however I want it in writing (again) how much I am going to be paid.

Should I even bother to watch them again if she calls? It was truly a day from heck. Then again like I said, the money is to good not to watch them. I’ll just take another hot bath afterwards!
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Old 02-20-2011, 08:54 AM
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nannyde nannyde is offline
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I get needing side jobs and needing to feed your family and pay your bills so take this with that in mind:

I wouldn't work for these guys because I don't respect their parenting choices. It would be a cold day in hail before I would allow a two year old to stay up for 13 hours straight so her parents could put her to bed the second I left. I wouldn't listen to a screaming five month old for thirteen hours. I wouldn't provide care for the kids while the Dad was in the house. I would have been willing to stay onsite to cover if he got called to work but I wouldn't have cared for the kids when he was able to do it.

I just couldn't do it no matter what the money was. I did a few years of caring for sibling groups in their homes on the weekends when my ds was little and it was AWESOME money.. but... I didn't have the parents telling me schedules or leaving me an untrained kid in undies. Once the parents left I did what I wanted to do. That's the only way "I" can care for kids.
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Old 02-20-2011, 09:02 AM
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Ummmm...did you get your money!? I don't understand why you didn't turn right around and say, Oh, sorry, this is short by $40. Yikes!
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Old 02-20-2011, 01:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
I just couldn't do it no matter what the money was. I did a few years of caring for sibling groups in their homes on the weekends when my ds was little and it was AWESOME money.. but... I didn't have the parents telling me schedules or leaving me an untrained kid in undies.
I totally respect your opinion so thanks for sharing. I didn't make myself clear. The first time I watched the kiddos, the girl was not potty trained but she had pull ups. When I saw she wasn't doing what I consider to be potty training...I didn't bother. Now yesterday she was completely trained...no accidents at all.


Quote:
Originally Posted by jen View Post
Ummmm...did you get your money!? I don't understand why you didn't turn right around and say, Oh, sorry, this is short by $40. Yikes!
No Jen I didn't get the money. It was a lesson learned. I am embarrassed and shy and I should have counted it right then and there. My loss I guess. I thought about it and I will watch them again provided they pay me the 40 on top of whatever is owed.

I am not going to make a big deal about it. If this was something I depended on (like a full time job) then I would. But it's just extra spending money.

Again, lesson learned.

Last edited by DCMomOf3; 02-20-2011 at 07:04 PM.
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Old 02-20-2011, 06:37 PM
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Seriously, send them a nicely worded invoice for the amount that you are owed. Do you think if Dad went to the store and realized he was over-charged by $40 he wouldn't return to the store and request a refund? It will be easier now than weeks from now when they ask you again.

Dear _____,

Thank you for thinking of me for your babysitting needs. I enjoy my time with Timmy and Billy and hope to continue to provide babysitting services for your children in the future.

As we have previously discussed, my hourly rate for childcare services is $XX. On (date) I provided care from (time) to (time), creating an amount due of ____. I recieved payment of ________, leaving a balance of ________.

Thank you for your prompt payment. I've enclosed a self addressed envelope for your convenience.

Sincerely,


You

Now, if you choose not to watch them again, so be it! At least you got your money for this time. Seriously, they won't have a problem with paying what you are owed and if they do, then you don't want to provide service for them anyway!
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Old 02-20-2011, 06:47 PM
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i think jen's suggestion is a good one - depending on your relationship with the parents along with how badly you need the money.

it could go one of a few ways - they could get the invoice, send you the money, and call you again for childcare in the future - thinking nothing of it other than "it was a simple mistake."

they could get the invoice and think, "really? does she think we won't pay her," send you the money and never call you again bc they're insulted.

or they could get the invoice and think "how dare her" - not pay you, AND not call you again.

only you know the dynamic between the family and yourself. if the mother asked YOU about the pay and seemed sincerely upset, i would assume that she will take care of it without needing to prompt her. let us know what happens!
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Old 02-20-2011, 06:52 PM
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Did Mom suggest that she would be paying you what was owed in the future? If so, I wouldn't send a note for a few weeks. Personally, for me, it wouldn't be about how much I "need" the money, just the principle of being paid for services rendered.

If requiring them to pay meant that I would lose the client, I'd lose the client. JMHO
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Old 02-20-2011, 06:56 PM
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well, i said it would depend on my relationship with the parents ALONG with how badly i needed the money because if i KNEW they would pay me AND i wasn't strapped for cash - i wouldn't think it was a big deal to wait until next time i watched the kids for them to pay me.

if i knew i might not watch the kids again for several months (or ever) it would play a role in if i decided to send an invoice or not. i mean, if i was going to see someone in a week or so who i owed money to - i would find it a little odd to get an "invoice" in the mail after i acknowledged owing the money.
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Old 02-20-2011, 10:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
I get needing side jobs and needing to feed your family and pay your bills so take this with that in mind:

I wouldn't work for these guys because I don't respect their parenting choices. It would be a cold day in hail before I would allow a two year old to stay up for 13 hours straight so her parents could put her to bed the second I left. I wouldn't listen to a screaming five month old for thirteen hours. I wouldn't provide care for the kids while the Dad was in the house. I would have been willing to stay onsite to cover if he got called to work but I wouldn't have cared for the kids when he was able to do it.

I just couldn't do it no matter what the money was. I did a few years of caring for sibling groups in their homes on the weekends when my ds was little and it was AWESOME money.. but... I didn't have the parents telling me schedules or leaving me an untrained kid in undies. Once the parents left I did what I wanted to do. That's the only way "I" can care for kids.
Exactly this! I wouldn't consent to watch them again until they consented to stop spoiling "little man". 13 hours is way too long to hold a child!! And, how would you get anything done with the older child if you were holding the younger one all the time? You've said that this is just spending money, and although it is good money, do you really want to be tied to this child for 13 hours??

I'm 41, and way back when, when I was a teen, I babysat all the time. I NEVER had the issues we seem to have today (like baby cannot be left to cry, baby cries whenever he's not being held, etc), and I got paid way better then, than I do now!!

This job seems to be well paid, but still, I'm not sure what amount would make me hold an infant for 13 hours straight! I'm pretty sure, for me anyway, there is no amount. In fact, I know it. I had a 4 month old that screamed all day. He screamed if I didn't hold him, if I put him down in activity seats, if we did tummy time, and sometimes he even cried while I was holding him. I was thinking about it one time, and tried to think of how much money it would take for me to be okay with holding/rocking/bouncing/patting him to sleep each time and then holding him all nap, and decided that even if they paid double (which would have been a very nice hourly amount) it would still not be worth it.

Only you know how much you are willing to do, or how much you are willing to put up with, but you asked for an opinion here, and my opinion is to find another side job.
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Old 02-21-2011, 03:16 PM
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Thanks ladies

I am not going to send an invoice as was suggested. This is only the 2nd time watching the kiddos since November. I was really surprised that she even called me when she did.

I have decided that with the thoughts and the opinions of this great forum I am going to wait to see if she needs care again. I am sure she will after caring for that beast

I am so glad that I have the backing and support of wonderful people like you guys.

Thanks again!
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