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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Almost Laugh At The Mom During My Interview Today
familyschoolcare 05:31 PM 07-08-2011
So I intreviewed a new a parent today, she asked me are their any strange men that hang around the house. I wanted to say no I know the name of all ten men that come to my house every day (insert sarcasm here). However, what I did say was I have a husband that has been finger printed, and works for the district attorney in the crime lab, and he is in the navy reserves so really he has three criminal clearances. This was an acceptable answer for her. Then I went on to explain that I have two children that live with me full time a 12 year old girl (pointing to her) and a 16 year old boy (pointing to him), and I have two step sons that do not live here but are sometime around that are 14 and 17. The Mom asks when does the 17 year old turn 18. Me “in March, at that time I will have him finger printed.” Mom “Oh so he will be 18 in March and might be in the house with my daughter.” Me “Yes, I will have him finger printed at that time.” Mom “Oh I am not sure how I feel about that” LOL Like he will do something at 18 years and one day that he would not do at 17 years and 360 days, or that my 16 year old son that is here everyday might not do.
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momma4many 05:34 PM 07-08-2011
Wow. Hello issues! Did you enroll her child?? Seems like a REALLY bad situation waiting to happen there.
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familyschoolcare 05:44 PM 07-08-2011
Originally Posted by momma4many:
Wow. Hello issues! Did you enroll her child?? Seems like a REALLY bad situation waiting to happen there.
I did not enroll the child she took a contract and said she still had two other places to look at today and she needed to talk to her worker. Not sure if I will accept her if she does call their where other things that lead me to believe that getting her to proper fill out her 4c's form and turn them in on time so I can get paid will be a problem. I do not have a problem in and of itself with taking a subsidy child as I once was on that program myself. However, I always filled our every paper and on time. Had the in home day care provider for my two children tell me how refreshing it was that she never had a problem with my payments.
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Crystal 05:45 PM 07-08-2011
With this comment:

Mom “Oh I am not sure how I feel about that”

I would have shown her the door.
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nannyde 06:21 PM 07-08-2011
I honestly worry about how my ds will affect my business in the future as he ages. He's turning eleven this month and he is HUMUNGOUS already. He will be six foot tall by the time he's fourteen.

Ugh... it is what it is.


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PitterPatter 06:26 PM 07-08-2011
Oh brother I see a can of worms if u take her on! JMHO!
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graham.shellbell 06:32 PM 07-08-2011
Ok let me say I have and 18 year old son who is 6'2 and 300 pounds..my dck LOVE him..especially my little girls. The parents have absolutely no problem with him whatsoever. He is not your typical 18 year old out running around stuff like that but at first glance he can look a little intimidating and not once have I had a potential family mention that he was a concern.


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familyschoolcare 07:01 PM 07-08-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I honestly worry about how my ds will affect my business in the future as he ages. He's turning eleven this month and he is HUMUNGOUS already. He will be six foot tall by the time he's fourteen.

Ugh... it is what it is.

Yah I did wonder how the teenager would affect the business the funny thing is if my step children where here it would not have been an issue because the 17 year old would have been playing with her two year old with the preschool toys because he likes them (he has a social disorder) and most people think he is the youngest of the three boys. LOL
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Meeko 08:25 PM 07-08-2011
I can see it now......

18 year old boy pats DCG on the head as he passes her and says "Hi Sweetie!"

Later that day......

Paranoid DCM: Did you have a good day at day care?

DCG: Yes I did.

Paranoid DCM: Was that 18 year old there?

DCG: Yes he was.

Paranoid DCM: OMG! Did he touch you?!

DCG: Yes he did.


You don't want to go there

My 26 year old son is my assistant. It used to be my husband before that. I have had a few mothers over the years who act as if I run a perverted facility simply because men work here. I never even set up an interview if I get the "Oh that's creepy" routine (one mom actually said that!) The single moms actually seem worse. I think many of them have "men issues". The married ones are usually fine with it. However, the single ladies who HAVE signed up have always quickly let me know how much they appreciate a good male role model in their childs life.

But if anyone seems wary of a male in your house........don't put yourself in what could be a bad situation.
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familyschoolcare 08:32 PM 07-08-2011
Originally Posted by Meeko60:


But if anyone seems wary of a male in your house........don't put yourself in what could be a bad situation.
I agree and part of me did not want to offer her a interview when she asked the same question over the phone. It just felt "wrong" to ask about "strange" men. If she had asked about visitors i would not have felt so uncomfortable.

I was not sure how to say I no longer want to offer you a place in my day care when I told her 4c's worker on the phone hours before that I had a spot for her child.
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MyAngels 08:36 PM 07-08-2011
Originally Posted by Meeko60:
I can see it now......

18 year old boy pats DCG on the head as he passes her and says "Hi Sweetie!"

Later that day......

Paranoid DCM: Did you have a good day at day care?

DCG: Yes I did.

Paranoid DCM: Was that 18 year old there?

DCG: Yes he was.

Paranoid DCM: OMG! Did he touch you?!

DCG: Yes he did.


You don't want to go there

My 26 year old son is my assistant. It used to be my husband before that. I have had a few mothers over the years who act as if I run a perverted facility simply because men work here. I never even set up an interview if I get the "Oh that's creepy" routine (one mom actually said that!) The single moms actually seem worse. I think many of them have "men issues". The married ones are usually fine with it. However, the single ladies who HAVE signed up have always quickly let me know how much they appreciate a good male role model in their childs life.

But if anyone seems wary of a male in your house........don't put yourself in what could be a bad situation.
I definitely agree with this. Not only could the situation be bad for you, but for your son(s) as well.
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youretooloud 08:59 PM 07-08-2011
Wow... I wonder what she's been reading????

I would worry about a parent like that. They seem to be the ones who cause the most problems later on. Heaven forbid her child exhibit any odd behaviors after you start watching her.

I'm always amazed when I see other parents who are quick to assume the child has been molested just because they've said or done something that makes an adult uncomfortable.
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cheerfuldom 06:34 AM 07-09-2011
she is probably just a parent that has heard a huge number of horror stories about various daycare issues. she will be the one "re-interviewing" constantly and needing reassurance about your services no matter how long her kid is there.
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TGPII 08:42 AM 04-13-2012
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
So I intreviewed a new a parent today, she asked me are their any strange men that hang around the house. I wanted to say no I know the name of all ten men that come to my house every day (insert sarcasm here). However, what I did say was I have a husband that has been finger printed, and works for the district attorney in the crime lab, and he is in the navy reserves so really he has three criminal clearances. This was an acceptable answer for her. Then I went on to explain that I have two children that live with me full time a 12 year old girl (pointing to her) and a 16 year old boy (pointing to him), and I have two step sons that do not live here but are sometime around that are 14 and 17. The Mom asks when does the 17 year old turn 18. Me “in March, at that time I will have him finger printed.” Mom “Oh so he will be 18 in March and might be in the house with my daughter.” Me “Yes, I will have him finger printed at that time.” Mom “Oh I am not sure how I feel about that” LOL Like he will do something at 18 years and one day that he would not do at 17 years and 360 days, or that my 16 year old son that is here everyday might not do.
http://www.youtube.com/movie?v=yaQ0q...&feature=mv_sr
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daycare 08:51 AM 04-13-2012
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I honestly worry about how my ds will affect my business in the future as he ages. He's turning eleven this month and he is HUMUNGOUS already. He will be six foot tall by the time he's fourteen.

Ugh... it is what it is.

Nan REALLY...are you really worried? You have nothing to worry about. YOur children are a reflection of you and how you raised them. your parents know this.. You have nothing to worry about.

My oldest is 16 he is 6ft2 and is very dark skin, eyes and hair. People always think there is a visitor in my house when they come. I tell them he is my son.....

To date only one family had a issue with him and they are not here any more... They decided to make racial comments, so I asked them to leave.
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mac60 09:05 AM 04-13-2012
Strange? yes, but if someone was to ask me for a background check. I would ask them to do one as well. It works both ways. My son is 23, lives at home and has had 3 background checks in the past 2 years. 2 for jobs in two different parts of the state to work at the nursing home and one for the nursing program. No one has ever asked about my kids, nor ever asked for a background check from me or my husband. I wouldn't like someone like that in my home either.
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Kelly 12:38 PM 04-13-2012
I was a little worried about how people would react to my sons when I got started. They are both 22, have Down Syndrome and are here all the time (finished school and no state funding for adult programs.) I've only been in business a couple months but so far everyone seems to be very accepting. I did put a paragraph on my website that they are here and how important I feel it is for young children to be around all different kinds of people. I also tell parents that while they may be in the day care area and may help me with things around the house, they will not have responsibility for caring for the kids and will not be left alone with the kids. (That is for my sons' protection, not the DCK's.)

Most of the time one of my sons is in the other part of the house. The other one is in the daycare almost all the time. He loves little kids and has a lot of fun with them, especially the 3-yr-old DCB. The DCB has never seemed to notice that there is anything different about my sons.

If there was a family that didn't want their child to be here with my sons, then they're not the kind of family I want to work with anyway.
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jen 03:57 PM 04-13-2012
Nan, I wouldn't worry about it. When I was doing daycare, my dcp often asked if my son could babysit.

For me, the key is making sure that children know how to interact with adults. There is nothing worse than an older child who can't hold an appropriate conversation. My kids all knew that greeting a parent, making eye contact, and making polite conversatin is a MUST.
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bgmeyers 05:58 PM 04-13-2012
Nan,
My son is a 15 year old football center....he is a BIG guy. My dc parents all know and love him. He plays with the kiddos and they cry when they have to leave him. He is totally hands on, giving them piggyback rides, pitching the baseball, and just being physical with them in general. He has a gentle soul and will be an awesome dad some day. If any parent had concerns about him, they were calmed within minutes of seeing how sweet he is with them.
My son is a HUGE ASSET to my daycare......do not be afraid. Like your son, he has grown up with these littles all around and has learned by my example as yours has as well.
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Abigail 08:32 PM 04-13-2012
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
So I intreviewed a new a parent today, she asked me are their any strange men that hang around the house. I wanted to say no I know the name of all ten men that come to my house every day (insert sarcasm here). However, what I did say was I have a husband that has been finger printed, and works for the district attorney in the crime lab, and he is in the navy reserves so really he has three criminal clearances. This was an acceptable answer for her. Then I went on to explain that I have two children that live with me full time a 12 year old girl (pointing to her) and a 16 year old boy (pointing to him), and I have two step sons that do not live here but are sometime around that are 14 and 17. The Mom asks when does the 17 year old turn 18. Me “in March, at that time I will have him finger printed.” Mom “Oh so he will be 18 in March and might be in the house with my daughter.” Me “Yes, I will have him finger printed at that time.” Mom “Oh I am not sure how I feel about that” LOL Like he will do something at 18 years and one day that he would not do at 17 years and 360 days, or that my 16 year old son that is here everyday might not do.
What was your initial response? I would have been offended and something would have popped out of my mouth or at least an "Excuse me, Can you explain?" and put the spotlight on the person to realise how dumb that really just sounded. "What do you mean you're not sure how you feel about that?" would be a perfect question for them to feel stupid.
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Michelle 08:53 PM 04-13-2012
look at the date of this first post!
good convo's though...age old issues
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DaisyMamma 05:43 AM 04-14-2012
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare:
I was not sure how to say I no longer want to offer you a place in my day care when I told her 4c's worker on the phone hours before that I had a spot for her child.
You tell her, I'm sorry, the place has been filled. I do not have room available at this time.
I had to do that a couple of weeks ago.
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DaisyMamma 05:44 AM 04-14-2012
Originally Posted by Michelle:
look at the date of this first post!
good convo's though...age old issues
LOL
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Tags:men in daycare, provider - own child, teens, unreasonable parental expectations
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