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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Smoking:{ HELP
MommyofThree 06:18 AM 08-19-2011
Omg I have had bad anixitey lately and maybe depressed, but I wont ever hurt the children or me. But I tried to get to the doc yesterday and they had no openings so I was so stress so I bought a pack of cigs It helped a whole lot. I smoked before my oldest was born and I quiet. But now it seems like I cant stop if I spray perfume on me will that cover up the smoke. I never smoke around the kids EVER..... but I go outside and smoke during buissness hours. So who smokes and the parents dont know? who covers it up with perfume and fools everyone? please advise.
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sharlan 06:31 AM 08-19-2011
Here, it is illegal to smoke around the children or anywhere on the premises during daycare hours.

But to answer your question, NO, you cannot hide the smell of cigarette smoke from a non smoker. IMHO, adding perfume to the mix just makes it worse.

If you have to smoke, I suggest you rinse your mouth out with mouthwash and wash your hands and face after every cigarette.
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Jewels 06:31 AM 08-19-2011
Ill be honest, I have nothing against smokers, grew up with smokers, my parents smoke, my husbands whole family smoke, and my husband and I used to smoke, until I got pregnant the first time, I never wanted my kids to grow up with smokers, if you grow up with one, your most likely to be one....But I dont judge smokers, unless they smoke inside their house or car, with their children......HOWEVER I do JUDGE daycare providers that smoke, I think being a daycare provider and a smoker is horrible, Whenever the kids stress you out, your going to sneak out to calm yourself by smoking instead of going and taking a deep breathe or something, and then your leaving your house and the kids inside unsupervised, and thats not cool, and if you say you wont be doing that its a lie, because when your a smoker, thats your only way out of stress, and kids can be stressful, and add being depressed on top of that, its just a bad combination for a daycare provider....and then I think if your really needing a cigarette and the kids are stressing you and you can't go out and have one it will just make you more upset and resentful towards the children. JMHO. Quit before your ahead, go see the doc get on meds, or quit daycare and be a smoker.
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MommyofThree 06:36 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by Jewels:
Ill be honest, I have nothing against smokers, grew up with smokers, my parents smoke, my husbands whole family smoke, and my husband and I used to smoke, until I got pregnant the first time, I never wanted my kids to grow up with smokers, if you grow up with one, your most likely to be one....But I dont judge smokers, unless they smoke inside their house or car, with their children......HOWEVER I do JUDGE daycare providers that smoke, I think being a daycare provider and a smoker is horrible, Whenever the kids stress you out, your going to sneak out to calm yourself by smoking instead of going and taking a deep breathe or something, and then your leaving your house and the kids inside unsupervised, and thats not cool, and if you say you wont be doing that its a lie, because when your a smoker, thats your only way out of stress, and kids can be stressful, and add being depressed on top of that, its just a bad combination for a daycare provider....and then I think if your really needing a cigarette and the kids are stressing you and you can't go out and have one it will just make you more upset and resentful towards the children. JMHO. Quit before your ahead, go see the doc get on meds, or quit daycare and be a smoker.
Thank you! I always hated smoke after I quiet. I will never pick up one again. your words are great. I just hate feeling this way, but am seeing the doc today. Thanks hun.
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Cat Herder 06:39 AM 08-19-2011
Self medicating is dangerous, hun.




Those diagnosed with anxiety disorders who attempt to treat their symptoms by self-medicating with alcohol or drugs are not only exacerbating their condition but are also increasing their risk of future chronic substance abuse disorders, according to a new study.



Researchers from the Departments of Psychiatry and Psychology at the University of Manitoba in Winnipeg, Canada caution that anxiety patients who believe they are alleviating their pain through using drugs and alcohol—although it may seem to bring them temporary relief—are creating hazardous risk factors for their long-term health. After conducting a three-year cohort study on patients with anxiety disorders, the researchers found that self-medication through alcohol and drug use was actually self-defeating as it worsened anxiety symptoms, especially panic, and led to an increased prevalence of substance abuse disorders among this population.

Lead researcher Jennifer Robinson, MA, presented the findings of her team’s study at the Canadian Psychiatric Association 60th Annual Conference in late September. In terms of clinical research, the relationship between anxiety disorders and substance use has not been extensively studied, although the comorbidity of these disorders is well known among clinicians and the general public. The researchers’ latest study adds evidence to this commonly assumed observation and can help clinicians become more aware of how to reach their patients’ mental health needs based on the identified link between self-medication and anxiety disorders.

For their study, the researchers used the National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions to gather long-term data on 34,653 different American adult patients. Among this population, the researchers categorized those individuals diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at baseline into a subgroup. Additionally, these individuals did not report having a substance abuse disorder at the start of the study. The researchers sought to discover whether the practice of self-medicating anxiety symptoms with drug use (including prescription drug misuse, illicit drug use, or alcohol abuse) predicted the development of a substance abuse disorder later on for individuals in this subgroup.

In their analysis, the researchers controlled such variable factors as age, gender, ethnicity, education, income, marital status, region, as well as preexisting mood or personality disorders and lifetime substance use. Three years following baseline, the researchers found that individuals who reported self-medicating their anxiety symptoms with drug use were at least four times likelier to develop a drug abuse problem, and more than twice as likely to develop a drug dependency as those who did not self-medicate. Self-medication involving alcohol use was related to a twofold increase for developing an alcohol abuse problem and more than threefold increase for developing alcohol dependency. Furthermore, the researchers found that many of those who were self-medicating through drug use were also using alcohol. Moderate alcohol use at baseline, although initially considered safe, was found to be a risk factor for developing an alcohol-related problem later on, according to researchers.

If these patients’ anxiety symptoms were adequately treated with sustained intervention, then patients would possibly be less inclined to resort to self-medicated substance use to appease their anxiety, the researchers suggest.

The researchers hope that their latest findings will encourage clinicians to consider substance use by their patients as a possible sign of an underlying anxiety disorder, and to become more proactive when it comes to detecting and treating these mental health issues among vulnerable individuals. Although further investigation is needed, the researchers propose that those patients with anxiety disorders who choose to self-medicate with substance use are actually less likely to seek professional treatment for their problems, making early detection and intervention key to their recovery.

Source: Medscape, Kate Johnson, Risk for Future Substance Abuse for Anxious Patients Who Self-Medicate, October 1, 2010
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wdmmom 06:43 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by Jewels:
Ill be honest, I have nothing against smokers, grew up with smokers, my parents smoke, my husbands whole family smoke, and my husband and I used to smoke, until I got pregnant the first time, I never wanted my kids to grow up with smokers, if you grow up with one, your most likely to be one....But I dont judge smokers, unless they smoke inside their house or car, with their children......HOWEVER I do JUDGE daycare providers that smoke, I think being a daycare provider and a smoker is horrible, Whenever the kids stress you out, your going to sneak out to calm yourself by smoking instead of going and taking a deep breathe or something, and then your leaving your house and the kids inside unsupervised, and thats not cool, and if you say you wont be doing that its a lie, because when your a smoker, thats your only way out of stress, and kids can be stressful, and add being depressed on top of that, its just a bad combination for a daycare provider....and then I think if your really needing a cigarette and the kids are stressing you and you can't go out and have one it will just make you more upset and resentful towards the children. JMHO. Quit before your ahead, go see the doc get on meds, or quit daycare and be a smoker.
I'm sure you're not a psychologist so I doubt your advice is going to go far. Everyone handles stress differently and while you tell someone to go about doing something this particular way, that way may not work for the next person.

Being a former smoker (my 10 month anniversary was the other day), I don't see your advice being helpful.

People have to WANT to quit before they can do it successfully. And although doctors suggest a change in diet and exercise, don't do it! Quitting is a struggle itself...why would you want to add to the mix with making all these changes. One thing at a time!

Just because you smoke doesn't mean you are a bad person or less capable of taking care of kids!
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Auntie 06:52 AM 08-19-2011
Try mixing up your routine during daycare hours. Say OK we are going for a walk if you have your hands on a stroller that may help too. I find when I am getting stressed due to the kids being loud or roudy that day I try to mix things up. Getting them outside really helps and gets my mind refocused. When I did daycare at home years ago I would call another provider close by to meet you for a walk with the kids that would help too. Even just an hour of a change in routine really helped to aleviate my stress/anxiousness.
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MommyofThree 06:52 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I'm sure you're not a psychologist so I doubt your advice is going to go far. Everyone handles stress differently and while you tell someone to go about doing something this particular way, that way may not work for the next person.

Being a former smoker (my 10 month anniversary was the other day), I don't see your advice being helpful.

People have to WANT to quit before they can do it successfully. And although doctors suggest a change in diet and exercise, don't do it! Quitting is a struggle itself...why would you want to add to the mix with making all these changes. One thing at a time!

Just because you smoke doesn't mean you are a bad person or less capable of taking care of kids!
Wow thank you. your advise is helpful also. I want to quiet but I have alot of stress right now. But as far as drug adict, um thats not a drug. I wont EVER use drinks as a way to soak my sorrows only because I do know that is could really be addictive. But as far as calling people who smoke drug addicts is kind of offensive
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Cat Herder 06:57 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by melissathayer28:
as far as drug addict, um thats not a drug. I wont EVER use drinks as a way to soak my sorrows only because I do know that is could really be addictive. But as far as calling people who smoke drug addicts is kind of offensive
It is a drug. Nicotine.

I chain smoked for years to self medicate ADD.

It kept me from seeking the proper treatment.

Don't get caught up in semantics, please.

With the proper treatment life can be pretty awesome. That is the point of the article.


Not judgement...just facts. I want you to be empowered, that is all.
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PitterPatter 07:06 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by melissathayer28:
Omg I have had bad anixitey latley and maybe depressed, but I wont ever hurt the children or me. But I tried to get to the doc yesterday and they had no openings so I was so stress so I bought a pack of cigs It helped a whole lot. I smoked before my oldest was born and I quiet. But now it seems like I cant stop if I spray perfume on me will that cover up the smoke. I never smoke around the kids EVER..... but I go outside and smoke during buissness hours. So who smokes and the parents dont know? who covers it up with perfume and fools everyone? please advise.
I'm sorry you are so stressed. I get stressed as well and I used to smoke about 16 years ago and quit cold turkey as it was the only way. It did help that I was so sick with the flu and bronchitis that I literally couldn't pull the smoke into my lungs. I don't wish that on anyone tho. I will never pick up another cigarett again because I feel much better and save money plus don't worry about the odor. My friend smokes and her parfume doesn't hide it, I can still smell both. Now if your clients are smokers they may not notice but to a non-smoker, we can.

Now I admitt I eat more when stressed which can turn to a bad thing so I hate to suggest that really. Have you tried popping a mint in your mouth when you want 1? Maybe break out an extra snack of carrot sticks? Try taking a long slow deep breath and just forcing it all out in an exhale a few times. I feel for you I really do, but I also worry about the children. Do they see you doing it when you go out? Are they left alone or do you have an assistant? I imagine just running outside for a minute to hurry and take a few puffs may actually stress you out more if you are worrying about what the children may be doing while you are outside.

I hope your doc can help you more. Good luck!
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wdmmom 07:10 AM 08-19-2011
Facts don't help a person quit.

And, if we believed everything the Food & Drug Administration told us, we'd all die because everything is bad or is considered a drug. Psssh!

OP, if you want to quit and have the urge to quit, start making small changes to help you.

Everytime you want to smoke, chew a piece of gum. Everytime you do need to smoke, only smoke half. Don't smoke according to the clock either. Find things to do with your time. Daycare.com is a great way to use your hands! Or pick up a hobby...crosstitching, sewing, etc.

Good luck to you!!!
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Cat Herder 07:18 AM 08-19-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
Facts don't help a person quit. !!
I know what you mean...I do.

The original post said she just bought a pack of cigarettes YESTERDAY when she got stressed.

As in she is NOT a smoker but was looking for something to calm her NOW.

I was trying to help her PREVENT becoming a smoker...

Quitting is really hard once you become addicted to them.

I am not ambushing smokers. I was trying to prevent someone with an anxiety disorder from ADDING another problem to her life.
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meganlavonnesmommy 07:23 AM 08-19-2011
I cant offer any help for the smoking, I've never smoked, so no help there.
And I'm not judging in anyway. But if you are trying to hide it from your parents...

you cant hide the smoke smell from a non smoker. No matter what you do, your parents will still smell it on you. The smell gets in your hair, your skin, your clothes. Perfumes and odor sprays just cover it, then you smell like smoke and perfume. :-)

Also, not sure what your licensing rules are, if any. But we are not allowed to step outside without the kids. Even for a second. We cant take the garbage out, take the dog out, grab the newspaper, or smoke. If we are outside, the kids must be too.

One time I left the kids inside, with the front door open, while I ran after the mailman, he had just picked up our outgoing mail, and I wanted a letter mailed that day. So I ran after him to give it to him. I was literally 15 steps outside the front door, and my licensing director pulled up in her car. I got written up for leaving the children unattended. :-)
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CheekyChick 07:30 AM 08-19-2011
Have you thought of trying the "patch" or Nicorette? That may help kick your habit for good.
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Christian Mother 09:42 AM 08-19-2011
I was a smoker for many yrs before I had my son and daughter and I was able to quit cold turkey and i know not everyone has it that easy. I was stressed and depressed and during those college days I lived with smokers so it was hard not to NOT smoke...lol. But, I agree...you can't really cover up smoke. It stains the close pretty good. My sister smokes and when she comes over I can smell it heavily. I do bring it up that she shouldn't smoke while driving but she doesn't seem to care much. You can wash your hands and face but the smoke smell is in the hair and clothes. It's gets every wear. When i get stressed out I change the routine also or put on fun music and we dance around the house do silly things...or...this is my vise...COFFEE!! I brew coffee and drink a couple of cups and that puts me in a way better mood. Have a couple girl days after daycare. Do things that distress you...even working out helps a lot!! I do all these things during my monthly...lol!! Those 2 week for me are Hell..I need every help I can get...I hope you feel better and I am sooo glad you are seeing the doctor. Hope he can help!! Brake that smoke addiction girlie!! You can do it!!
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MyAngels 11:02 AM 08-19-2011
If you continue to smoke during the time that children are in your care who will be supervising them when you "go outside and smoke during buissness [sic] hours"?

Hopefully you have an assistant?

That would not be allowed in my state.
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dEHmom 05:55 AM 08-25-2011
I'm not going to get into the nitty gritty about whether you're allowed to or not, watching kids when you go etc. If you are doing it before and after hours, during naptimes or whatever.

I suggest this:

Put your hair up so it doesn't have as much room to absorb or put a hat/hood on

Wear a sweater/jacket that you only use for smoking, and never wear it around the dck's or dcp's.

wash your hands well after each smoke

dousing yourself in perfume before they walk in is going to make it obvious you are hiding something.

chew gum/eat mints

smoke with your back to the wind so the wind blows away from you and not towards you.

i know people who smoke with thin gloves on so their fingers don't stain/stink
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Unregistered 05:13 PM 08-25-2011
This message stuck out to me not because of the smoking but because of the anxiety issues. I have anxiety problems, too. It is scary and hard to explain to people that don't "get it." Put down the cigarettes and call your doctor and tell them you must come in and see them. Tell them you are concerned about your mental state and you need help now. I know this isn't an emergency where you're going to lose it and slap someone, but it is hard to work with kids when you are in an anxious state. Please, get the help for the anxiety issues now!!! I will be thinking of you.
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Tags:anxiety, depressed, smoking, stressed
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