Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>4 Year Old Hitting, Kicking and Knocking Over
Ac114 05:37 AM 02-14-2020
I have a 4 year old in care that started in September. He goes to preschool Monday through Thursday and only have him 1-4 and then a full day in Fridayís. I cant afford to term him but at the same time Iím not willing to deal with this behavior, especially since I have him some little bit will have him full time in the summer. Here are the major incidences weíve had since September.
1: sitting on the couch, toddler walking along the couch, he kicked them in the chest knocking them completely on their back because he didnít want them near him.
2. Forcefully knocked another toddler over because again, they were near him.
3.hit child in the head with a large dump truck because they were near his toy
4.struck a child in the face for being near his toy.

These are the major incidences, let alone the daily crying, whining yelling because someone was near him. At 4 years old I donít think this is normal behavior. Anytime I bring it up to the parents, they say well itís kind of hard to work on since heís an only child. I understand that but Iíve had enough. How would you address it this time since it just happened again and Iím to the point of terming.
Reply
Cat Herder 05:47 AM 02-14-2020
It does not sound like you can afford not to term. What did the parents of the toddlers say when they were told of their children's injuries? Head trauma in toddlers is very dangerous. Coup-countre coup brain injuries from forceful falls and hits can kill them.

You may lose all of your other clients if you don't term this one.
Reply
Ac114 05:52 AM 02-14-2020
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
It does not sound like you can afford not to term. What did the parents of the toddlers say when they were told of their children's injuries? Head trauma in toddlers is very dangerous. Coup-countre coup brain injuries from forceful falls and hits can kill them.

You may lose all of your other clients if you don't term this one.
Thatís kind of how I feel. The other parents were obviously not happy and today it was my own child that was the victim.
I guess Iím looking for the words to say this is a serious matter and youíre looking at termination because I can not have another incident, especially with one thatís met with well heís an only child so canít do much, sorry.
Reply
Cat Herder 06:00 AM 02-14-2020
I would simply tell them the child has outgrown my services and needs an environment better suited to his current needs. You don't have to tell them what those are unless they ask. You have already tried that. They may need to hear it from the next place more. I do terminations face to face.

If asked:

I'd say he is simply unsafe to be around small children until he learns to better control his emotions and physical response to them. Being in a class with only same-aged or older children will better allow him to work on that without injuring smaller children.

You would be shocked at how many parents are actually happy to hear their child is bullying others. He is tough, "Just like Dad". Just don't ask about Dad's incarcerations.
Reply
Ac114 06:07 AM 02-14-2020
Thank you! This sounds great! I was having trouble formulating my thoughts and this sounds perfect.
Reply
Cat Herder 06:10 AM 02-14-2020
Originally Posted by Ac114:
Thank you! This sounds great! I was having trouble formulating my thoughts and this sounds perfect.
I always make it about the kids' needs vs the kids' behaviors. The simple truth is that their behavior is a form of communication about their unmet needs. Sometimes we can help meet them, sometimes we can't.
Reply
Blackcat31 06:31 AM 02-14-2020
I would do exactly what Cat Herder would.

In my experience those kids that attend preschool AND daycare are the worst behaved. I do everything in my power to avoid that type of enrollment situation.

The minute a parent starts talking preschool, I let them know I am not a program willing to suck up the care needs around a preschool schedule. It rarely if ever works. At least not for me. I end up with a kid that behaves exactly as the one you have now.
Reply
Tags:terminate - bad behavior, violence in child care
Reply Up