Daycare.com Forum Daycare Forum

Go Back   Daycare.com Forum > Main Category > Daycare Center and Family Home Forum

Daycare Center and Family Home Forum Daycare Center and Family Home owners, Directors, Operators and Assistants should post and ask questions here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:25 AM
sahm2three's Avatar
sahm2three sahm2three is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,113
Default The SCARIEST Daycare Moment!

Yesterday, one of the littles that has been sick for weeks, spiked a fever. We called mom and left a message. Within minutes, he started coughing and throwing up. I start cleaning him up and then he starts coughing again and stops breathing!!!! He started to turn blue, I was doing everything I could thing of to get him breathing again, and finally he started crying. I was seconds away from calling 911. My assistant called the mom again, this time at her work, not her cell and this was her reaction after being told what happened, "Well, I will call my husband to see if he can get off of work." My assistant said, "Your child stopped breathing! You need to come get him and take him to the doc or we will call 911!" She huffed and puffed and hung up. About 10 or 15 mins went by and we had not heard anything and so my assistant called back. All the while I am still helping him struggle through coughing. She doesn't answer her cell AGAIN. A couple mins later she texts my cell and says the dad is on his way. Can you believe that?! My reaction would have been, "I am on my way!" I would have shot out the door and not cared what anyone said or thought! My child is #1! NOT any job. I don't care what my job was. So, I am hearing now that she is bad mouthing me to anyone who will listen. I am doing this to safeguard all of the kids. I guess he went to the doc last night and something was wrong and he has to go back again today, but she won't say what is wrong. If there is something contagious, doesn't she need to tell me so that I can warn the other parents?! They are always bringing their kids sick. In the last few weeks I have sent the baby home sick at least once a week! He has been miserable and their #1 has been "we can't miss work". I understand that stress, but no matter what, nothing will EVER be more important than my kids!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:30 AM
Breezy's Avatar
Breezy Breezy is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,271
Default

Omg!! If it had been my child I would have broken all the traffic laws to get there!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:34 AM
familyschoolcare's Avatar
familyschoolcare familyschoolcare is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: California
Posts: 1,287
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Breezy View Post
Omg!! If it had been my child I would have broken all the traffic laws to get there!!!!
Please do not do that. I have paramedic friend that tells stories of people getting into acidents and seriously hurting themselves to get to a hurt child, so not worth it.

Now with that said if you where speaking figuratively and not literaly, then I fully understand and agree compleatly.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:36 AM
Springdaze's Avatar
Springdaze Springdaze is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 526
Default

Scary! i would make her give you a drs note regardless of whether he is contagious or not. I would want to know why it happened.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:37 AM
familyschoolcare's Avatar
familyschoolcare familyschoolcare is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: California
Posts: 1,287
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
Yesterday, one of the littles that has been sick for weeks, spiked a fever. We called mom and left a message. Within minutes, he started coughing and throwing up. I start cleaning him up and then he starts coughing again and stops breathing!!!! He started to turn blue, I was doing everything I could thing of to get him breathing again, and finally he started crying. I was seconds away from calling 911. My assistant called the mom again, this time at her work, not her cell and this was her reaction after being told what happened, "Well, I will call my husband to see if he can get off of work." My assistant said, "Your child stopped breathing! You need to come get him and take him to the doc or we will call 911!" She huffed and puffed and hung up. About 10 or 15 mins went by and we had not heard anything and so my assistant called back. All the while I am still helping him struggle through coughing. She doesn't answer her cell AGAIN. A couple mins later she texts my cell and says the dad is on his way. Can you believe that?! My reaction would have been, "I am on my way!" I would have shot out the door and not cared what anyone said or thought! My child is #1! NOT any job. I don't care what my job was. So, I am hearing now that she is bad mouthing me to anyone who will listen. I am doing this to safeguard all of the kids. I guess he went to the doc last night and something was wrong and he has to go back again today, but she won't say what is wrong. If there is something contagious, doesn't she need to tell me so that I can warn the other parents?! They are always bringing their kids sick. In the last few weeks I have sent the baby home sick at least once a week! He has been miserable and their #1 has been "we can't miss work". I understand that stress, but no matter what, nothing will EVER be more important than my kids!
As far as needing to know if you need to wrn other parents or be prepared for something. the solution is simple you need a doctors note saying what the child had/has and any treatment being given.

What this parent did is consider child neglect/endangerment. I think you should keep a log of it. Has the parent done anything the serious before. Is it a pattern, the start of a pattern?
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:38 AM
Solandia's Avatar
Solandia Solandia is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 372
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
Yesterday, one of the littles that has been sick for weeks, spiked a fever. We called mom and left a message. Within minutes, he started coughing and throwing up. I start cleaning him up and then he starts coughing again and stops breathing!!!! He started to turn blue, I was doing everything I could thing of to get him breathing again, and finally he started crying. I was seconds away from calling 911. My assistant called the mom again, this time at her work, not her cell and this was her reaction after being told what happened, "Well, I will call my husband to see if he can get off of work." My assistant said, "Your child stopped breathing! You need to come get him and take him to the doc or we will call 911!" She huffed and puffed and hung up. About 10 or 15 mins went by and we had not heard anything and so my assistant called back. All the while I am still helping him struggle through coughing. She doesn't answer her cell AGAIN. A couple mins later she texts my cell and says the dad is on his way. Can you believe that?! My reaction would have been, "I am on my way!" I would have shot out the door and not cared what anyone said or thought! My child is #1! NOT any job. I don't care what my job was. So, I am hearing now that she is bad mouthing me to anyone who will listen. I am doing this to safeguard all of the kids. I guess he went to the doc last night and something was wrong and he has to go back again today, but she won't say what is wrong. If there is something contagious, doesn't she need to tell me so that I can warn the other parents?! They are always bringing their kids sick. In the last few weeks I have sent the baby home sick at least once a week! He has been miserable and their #1 has been "we can't miss work". I understand that stress, but no matter what, nothing will EVER be more important than my kids!
oooh, scary! I would be ticked off at mom, too. I am not 911 happy, but for baby going blue, I would have. Even if it was "just" choking on vomit. I have had kids choke before (and had to do the heimlich), but they never went blue. My neighbor's baby went blue due to an aspirated vomit episode, and she stayed in the hospital for a day and a half. It was a very rattling experience for my neighbor and her dh.

As far as mom/dad telling you if the child is contagious or not...NO, they do not need to, and it is their right to withhold medical info from anyone. Only in very limited situation, that the parents must tell you a medical issue about their child. However, it is also your right to not care for a child with medical needs that are unknown to you.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:39 AM
Lilbutterflie's Avatar
Lilbutterflie Lilbutterflie is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: TX
Posts: 1,366
Default

Oh my goodness, how scary!! I am so sorry you have had such a scary experience, I can't even imagine.

This is no offense to you... and I do realize that in emergencies sometimes you do not always react how you should... but 911 should have been called immediately after the child stopped breathing. In my CPR class we learned that when a child stops breathing; and you have an assistant (as you stated); the very first thing you do is send them to call 911. Then, you start the steps of CPR. This would have avoided all the frustration with the mom; b/c she would have been called SECOND after 911; telling her an ambulence was on it's way to assist her child b/c he/she had stopped breathing.

About the mom, I just can't imagine being a parent told their child had stopped breathing; and saying "I'll call the father to see if he can leave work." Wow. Just unbelievable. I would keep following up with the parents to ask for his diagnosis. I would INSIST on a written diagnosis prior to him returning to your care. Do the research on that diagnosis to see if he is well enough and safe to return to daycare.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:39 AM
Sunshine44's Avatar
Sunshine44 Sunshine44 is offline
Running away from home
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 280
Default

Honestly, I'd term for that behavior.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:40 AM
countrymom's Avatar
countrymom countrymom is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: ontario canada
Posts: 4,756
Default

bad bad mommy.!
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:42 AM
Breezy's Avatar
Breezy Breezy is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,271
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by familyschoolcare View Post
Please do not do that. I have paramedic friend that tells stories of people getting into acidents and seriously hurting themselves to get to a hurt child, so not worth it.

Now with that said if you where speaking figuratively and not literaly, then I fully understand and agree compleatly.
Yes figuratively speaking! Very good reminder there about ppl getting hurt rushing. Thank yiu!
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:43 AM
Daycaremomof2's Avatar
Daycaremomof2 Daycaremomof2 is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: California
Posts: 101
Default

Term term term!!!

What if that child is naping and stops breathing- if she is already bad mouthing you now, what do you think would happen if something hapened at naptime that you did not see?

This brought tears to my eyes- how horrible of the parents. I would have left work immediately, called my boss on the way out the door and told her I had an emergency.

And now they wont tell you what happened?

There is too much liability here- even if you need the money, sometimes it isn't worth it.

I am so sorry, that is so scary. I had a child choke yesterday at lunch time and had to do the finger sweep- thank God that worked, but i definitely is a heart stopping moment when you first realize they are not breathing.

OMG that poor child
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:47 AM
Breezy's Avatar
Breezy Breezy is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,271
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilbutterflie View Post
Oh my goodness, how scary!! I am so sorry you have had such a scary experience, I can't even imagine.

This is no offense to you... and I do realize that in emergencies sometimes you do not always react how you should... but 911 should have been called immediately after the child stopped breathing. In my CPR class we learned that when a child stops breathing; and you have an assistant (as you stated); the very first thing you do is send them to call 911. Then, you start the steps of CPR. This would have avoided all the frustration with the mom; b/c she would have been called SECOND after 911; telling her an ambulence was on it's way to assist her child b/c he/she had stopped breathing.

About the mom, I just can't imagine being a parent told their child had stopped breathing; and saying "I'll call the father to see if he can leave work." Wow. Just unbelievable. I would keep following up with the parents to ask for his diagnosis. I would INSIST on a written diagnosis prior to him returning to your care. Do the research on that diagnosis to see if he is well enough and safe to return to daycare.
When you wrote "telling her there was an ambulance on its way to assist her child because he stopped breating" i got chills and shudderd imagining if i was told something like that. How could this mom not react the same way!!

Thank goodness the child was not sleeping when this happened-it could have easily gone the other way. Good for you for acting so wonderfully under the pressure and helping him. How old is he?
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:48 AM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 13,753
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Daycaremomof2 View Post
There is too much liability here- even if you need the money, sometimes it isn't worth it.

I agree.....

Not a good situation.
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 01-26-2012, 07:52 AM
littlemissmuffet's Avatar
littlemissmuffet littlemissmuffet is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,081
Default

Terminate. YESTERDAY!
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:01 AM
beachgrl's Avatar
beachgrl beachgrl is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: where the waves crash..in my time off at least
Posts: 554
Default

No way, thats insane! I thinkni would have called 911 after she didnt answer her cell phone again and i would have let them deal with getting thenkidnfrom the paramedics or hospital. I would not let them back without a doc note clearing him back into group care. Most daycaresnhave a health policy stating that if its anything contagious they need to notify the provider so they can notify other parents so yes she should have to disclose whether she likes it or not!

Poor baby, omg..
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:02 AM
beachgrl's Avatar
beachgrl beachgrl is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: where the waves crash..in my time off at least
Posts: 554
Default

I onestly dont know if id continue care either as this sounds like something just waiting to happen!
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:08 AM
laundrymom's Avatar
laundrymom laundrymom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 4,222
Default

Dear parent,
Due to your actions following my attempt to get medical help for your child yesterday, our childcare agreement is terminated immediately.

Signed,
concerned provider.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:08 AM
Heidi's Avatar
Heidi Heidi is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 6,858
Default

sahm-

This is your answer! You know you have been struggling with overload there. You need to terminate this family. Baby cries all the time, older kids run wild, parents bring kids sick, and now this.

If you let this family go, can you scale your assitant to part time or let her go altogether? That is what I would do.

Tough decision, but it means PEACE!
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:09 AM
Crystal's Avatar
Crystal Crystal is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 3,955
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilbutterflie View Post
Oh my goodness, how scary!! I am so sorry you have had such a scary experience, I can't even imagine.

This is no offense to you... and I do realize that in emergencies sometimes you do not always react how you should... but 911 should have been called immediately after the child stopped breathing. In my CPR class we learned that when a child stops breathing; and you have an assistant (as you stated); the very first thing you do is send them to call 911. Then, you start the steps of CPR. This would have avoided all the frustration with the mom; b/c she would have been called SECOND after 911; telling her an ambulence was on it's way to assist her child b/c he/she had stopped breathing.

About the mom, I just can't imagine being a parent told their child had stopped breathing; and saying "I'll call the father to see if he can leave work." Wow. Just unbelievable. I would keep following up with the parents to ask for his diagnosis. I would INSIST on a written diagnosis prior to him returning to your care. Do the research on that diagnosis to see if he is well enough and safe to return to daycare.
Yes, this. I am surprised this is not the chain of events that occurred.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:11 AM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 13,753
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Crystal View Post
Yes, this. I am surprised this is not the chain of events that occurred.
Few people have accesss to this training outside of major cities and "wealthy" States....

Alot of classes just breeze over the steps of CPR....not actual scenarios of events like in a daycare environment.

I WISH there was easier access to GOOD training for everyone....
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:25 AM
Lilbutterflie's Avatar
Lilbutterflie Lilbutterflie is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: TX
Posts: 1,366
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Catherder View Post
Few people have accesss to this training outside of major cities and "wealthy" States....

Alot of classes just breeze over the steps of CPR....not actual scenarios of events like in a daycare environment.

I WISH there was easier access to GOOD training for everyone....
I am so thankful this post came up; it is a great reminder for CPR basics!

Now all of us reading have been reminded to send someone to call 911 and then start doing CPR if a child stops breathing. If you are alone (as I am all day); you should do 5 sets (1 set= 2 breaths, 30 compressions) of CPR and THEN call 911 (regardless if child is breathing again or not). After calling 911, resume CPR if child is still not breathing.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:26 AM
sahm2three's Avatar
sahm2three sahm2three is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,113
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Crystal View Post
Yes, this. I am surprised this is not the chain of events that occurred.
It happened very quickly, and what seemed like forever was only seconds. I knew that in a coughing fit opening a window to let the cold air to them would help, so as I was patting his back and checking his mouth for foreign substance I told my assistant to open the window. We were literally within seconds of calling 911. I probably still should have, especially after the way the parents reacted, but I guess once I got him crying and breathing I was just so relieved my head was spinning. How often do you ever hear of this kind of thing happening?! I have attempted to call the parents today, and they are both avoiding me. So do I send a letter to term? A text? What do I do? Leave a voicemail message?
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:32 AM
Country Kids's Avatar
Country Kids Country Kids is offline
Nature Lover
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 5,044
Default

I do have a question that is never taught in ANY cpr class I have taken. How are you suppose to do CPR when you are calling 911 or how are you suppose to call 911 if you are doing CPR? I have never figured out how to do that one.
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 01-26-2012, 08:36 AM
Lilbutterflie's Avatar
Lilbutterflie Lilbutterflie is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: TX
Posts: 1,366
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I do have a question that is never taught in ANY cpr class I have taken. How are you suppose to do CPR when you are calling 911 or how are you suppose to call 911 if you are doing CPR? I have never figured out how to do that one.
If you are alone, you do 5 sets of CPR. Stop CPR to call 911. I suppose if you have a phone that allows you to turn speaker on; you could technically attempt to do CPR while still on the phone with 911. After getting off the phone, resume CPR if child is still not breathing.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 01-26-2012, 09:02 AM
Daycaremomof2's Avatar
Daycaremomof2 Daycaremomof2 is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: California
Posts: 101
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
It happened very quickly, and what seemed like forever was only seconds. I knew that in a coughing fit opening a window to let the cold air to them would help, so as I was patting his back and checking his mouth for foreign substance I told my assistant to open the window. We were literally within seconds of calling 911. I probably still should have, especially after the way the parents reacted, but I guess once I got him crying and breathing I was just so relieved my head was spinning. How often do you ever hear of this kind of thing happening?! I have attempted to call the parents today, and they are both avoiding me. So do I send a letter to term? A text? What do I do? Leave a voicemail message?
If they continue to not respond to your, I would e-mail them a termination letter, followed by a text that says, "Been trying to contact you- please check your e-mail).

Then take a big sigh of relief!

So sorry
Reply With Quote
  #26  
Old 01-26-2012, 09:45 AM
Christian Mother's Avatar
Christian Mother Christian Mother is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Sunny Out Here, AZ
Posts: 876
Default

Ohh my gosh I'm shaken reading this...I've never been through anything like that. I've had to do the finger swipe bc of a child choking on a apple piece or grape or strawberry..not sure why it's always the fruit?! But that is horrifying...OP I feel awful for you to have gone through that!! Sending prayers your way and for that blessed baby!!

OP my advise is to take a calm breath...then at nap time call again and leave a ms on vm mail if it goes there and just tell them you are concerned and that is why you are calling so often. Tell them that you understand they may be with their child, working etc. but as the provider this child ways on your heart and you are just calling to see how they are fairing as well as see if there is anything you can do for them. I would then leave it at that. If you make it confrontational they won't respond I am thinking they are feeling bad all around for their actions and guilty as well. As a mom I can not believe that instead of stop drop and run out the door to lend aid to her child she wanted to pass it off to her husband to deal with. To be honest, I would of started CPR and then called 911 and bc I am a lone I'd have it on speaker phone listening to the operator but still performing CPR. I'd make one call to the mom telling her as little as possible and that Paramedics are on their way as child stopped breathing due to excessive coughing and where she can meet up with the paramedics to find her child. Then I'd tell her before hanging up that child will NOT be able to attend daycare til their is a written diagnosis from the doctor releasing child back in your care. She may not get all that but I'd leave it up to her to call you back to find out when the child could come back with you giving her the same inform. and also that regardless of days missed they need to be paid before child is excepted back in care. Both in hand at time of care. That is to scary. If the parents neglect to contact you back this week then by Fri. I'd determine that with you trying to make contact and they are not following up with you...I'd send a termination letter. It's sad but you do need to know about this child and not be left hanging.
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Old 01-26-2012, 09:56 AM
Ariana's Avatar
Ariana Ariana is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 8,970
Default

First off I would term her ON THE SPOT!!

If there was ever a 2nd time I'd be calling 911 and not the mother. period. She's a loser.

3rd you should be calling 911 regardless whenever an infant stops breathing for any amount of time.

I am so sorry you had to go through that but you did an AMAZING job staying calm and getting him breathing again!! You quite possibly saved his life
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 01-26-2012, 10:32 AM
Heidi's Avatar
Heidi Heidi is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 6,858
Default

Sahm-

Please document this situation completely (even if not required by your regs), and have your assistant do the same, or sign your documentation. Then, call your regulator and give him or her a heads up about the situation. I worry that when you term, there will be the old blame game and they will call you in. Make sure you are covered.

In WI, we must fill out an incident report for any situation that requires a doctor's visit. Even though this wasn't an injury, I would cover your behind and do one!
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 01-26-2012, 11:13 AM
littlemissmuffet's Avatar
littlemissmuffet littlemissmuffet is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,081
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ariana View Post
3rd you should be calling 911 regardless whenever an infant stops breathing for any amount of time.
I agree. I have had a couple of scary incidents with my daycare kiddos... I ALWAYS call 911 FIRST, requesting an EMT come to my house and then I phone parents to also come immediately. Even if a child starts breathing again, has fisnished going through a seizure, etc it's always better to be safe than sorry in case there is a second episode while waiting for parents to arrive - also, there is a record with 911 of what occured.
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 01-26-2012, 11:43 AM
laundrymom's Avatar
laundrymom laundrymom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 4,222
Default

[quote=ariana;190315ut you did an amazing job staying calm and getting him breathing again!! You quite possibly saved his life [/quote]

this!!!!!!!! You rock!!!!!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #31  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:01 PM
saved4always's Avatar
saved4always saved4always is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,011
Default

I would have called 911 right away when the baby was not breathing (or, as in your case, would have had the assistent called since you were doing CPR).

And I would definitely term. I would send a text, an email and probably call....cuz I am one for overkill and would want to make sure they "got the message". That is shocking that the mother did not immediately leave work to get to her child. No one and nothing would have stopped me from getting to my child if I got a call like that! I probably wouldn't have even remembered that I had a boss or a job...I would be THAT single-minded.

And I definitely agree with everyone that you should document the whole sequence of events and have your assistant sign it, too. The mom sounds like someone who would play the blame game (can anyone say heartless b****???!!!!).

Good job on possibly saving this child's life!!!! That baby was so lucky to have you as a caregiver when this happened!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #32  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:09 PM
Francine's Avatar
Francine Francine is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Northern Lower Michigan
Posts: 464
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshine44 View Post
Honestly, I'd term for that behavior.
I seriously think I would too!
Reply With Quote
  #33  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:29 PM
wdmmom wdmmom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: WDM, IA
Posts: 2,669
Default

I don't a ZERO tolerance policy for stupidity and this would definitely classify as just that!

If the situation was as serious as you state, calling 911 should have happened! And, if after calling DCM she still didn't care, I would have called DHS for neglect! She is clearly neglecting her duties as a MOTHER!

She didn't seem to have much if any concern for her ill child. And, if he missed daycare today because he has to go back to the doctor, clearly there is something wrong and she's not disclosing what!

As a parent, I would want my provider to tell me what (if anything) my child may have been exposed to.

Because she's now running her mouth and won't tell you what's wrong, I'd send her a termination notice TODAY!!!
Reply With Quote
  #34  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:36 PM
bunnyslippers's Avatar
bunnyslippers bunnyslippers is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 981
Default

I would not continue to care for that child. Not for even a day longer. There is no positive spin to place on working with a family like that. Not to mention the liability if something else happens with that child. Shame on that mother! Furthermore, if she is bashing you all over town she is also not someone I would want to work with. If she feels that strongly about you, why on earth would she bring her child to you?!!? Amazing. So sorry you had to deal with that!
Reply With Quote
  #35  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:36 PM
Kaddidle Care's Avatar
Kaddidle Care Kaddidle Care is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 2,085
Default

I read your post and said, "omg, omg! OMG!"

I'm with the girls that said they would term. I certainly wouldn't let the child back in without a Doctor's note. Sounds like RSV.

You did a great job - I'm sure you needed a stiff drink that night!

What a poor excuse for a mother. Poor kid.
Reply With Quote
  #36  
Old 01-26-2012, 12:46 PM
SilverSabre25's Avatar
SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Where I am legally unlicensed ;), USA
Posts: 7,625
Default

scary, scary, scary! having a child stop breathing for any reason is a big fear of mine...I've had training, I know the stuff in my head, and I know i tend to react well in emergency situations but I'm afraid of this particular one.

(((HUGS))) sahm, I would probably term too. That mother needs a smack in the back of the head to wake her up to the real world...
Reply With Quote
  #37  
Old 01-26-2012, 01:01 PM
MarinaVanessa's Avatar
MarinaVanessa MarinaVanessa is offline
Family Childcare Home
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ventura County, CA
Posts: 7,200
Default

To those who say document. I have to agree. I'm wondering if you are licensed. If you are you may be required to fill out an accidend/injury report and call to notify licensing. I'm in CA and here it's a requirement, so I'd check.

As for the incident itself, all I can say is wow. As I read the original post, I went cold. I'm glad it turned out the way it did and sorry that the mom didn't take it as seriously as she should have.
Reply With Quote
  #38  
Old 01-26-2012, 01:12 PM
Crystal's Avatar
Crystal Crystal is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 3,955
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
It happened very quickly, and what seemed like forever was only seconds. I knew that in a coughing fit opening a window to let the cold air to them would help, so as I was patting his back and checking his mouth for foreign substance I told my assistant to open the window. We were literally within seconds of calling 911. I probably still should have, especially after the way the parents reacted, but I guess once I got him crying and breathing I was just so relieved my head was spinning. How often do you ever hear of this kind of thing happening?! I have attempted to call the parents today, and they are both avoiding me. So do I send a letter to term? A text? What do I do? Leave a voicemail message?
First, let me say, you did well getting him breathing again.

I would still have called 911, as it could have occured again and WHAT IF you couldn't get him breathing again? I can imagine though that you were somewhat in shock and relieved at the same time.

Rarely do I hear of this type of thing occurring.....15 years in the biz and it has yet to happen to me (knock on wood)

If the parents are avoiding you and are refusing to discuss the matter, I would send them a certified letter of termination, with clear, exact details about why. I would not text or call at all at this point. You have done what you can to contact them, they are not answering you, send a cert letter, if they don't accept it, it's on them and you can take them to court for any fees due.

I would also contact licensing to inform them of the incident, AND I would call CPS to report Mom's nonchalance.

Good luck
Reply With Quote
  #39  
Old 01-26-2012, 02:59 PM
sahm2three's Avatar
sahm2three sahm2three is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,113
Default

I talked to my licensor this morning right away. She has it all documented. I have saved texts and voicemail messages. I think I have all my bases covered. I am just so worried about the little guy, and for my other families sakes, I would like to know what is going on with him! And for my own family! Do I just assume it is RSV or whooping cough or something?! I still cannot believe it happened. I asked whether or not I should call to report her to DHS and she said that it would just be speculation, and if I felt confident that this is a pattern, to call, but if I didn't then to leave it alone. She said I would just set myself up for retaliation. So I am torn. I am going to get a term letter ready, but OMGosh, I have so much to say but need to keep it to the point. Thank you all! It was the scariest thing ever. I still just can't believe it happened.
Reply With Quote
  #40  
Old 01-26-2012, 04:44 PM
Heidi's Avatar
Heidi Heidi is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 6,858
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
I talked to my licensor this morning right away. She has it all documented. I have saved texts and voicemail messages. I think I have all my bases covered. I am just so worried about the little guy, and for my other families sakes, I would like to know what is going on with him! And for my own family! Do I just assume it is RSV or whooping cough or something?! I still cannot believe it happened. I asked whether or not I should call to report her to DHS and she said that it would just be speculation, and if I felt confident that this is a pattern, to call, but if I didn't then to leave it alone. She said I would just set myself up for retaliation. So I am torn. I am going to get a term letter ready, but OMGosh, I have so much to say but need to keep it to the point. Thank you all! It was the scariest thing ever. I still just can't believe it happened.

You made the right decision!

Write your letter, keep it simple. Do not go into every gory detail, or your feelings. Just the facts and the consequence. Have someone not emotionally involved read it. If nothing else, PM it to me, and I can look it over. Leave out any names, of course!
Reply With Quote
  #41  
Old 01-26-2012, 05:21 PM
Unregistered
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
Yesterday, one of the littles that has been sick for weeks, spiked a fever. We called mom and left a message. Within minutes, he started coughing and throwing up. I start cleaning him up and then he starts coughing again and stops breathing!!!! He started to turn blue, I was doing everything I could thing of to get him breathing again, and finally he started crying. I was seconds away from calling 911. My assistant called the mom again, this time at her work, not her cell and this was her reaction after being told what happened, "Well, I will call my husband to see if he can get off of work." My assistant said, "Your child stopped breathing! You need to come get him and take him to the doc or we will call 911!" She huffed and puffed and hung up. About 10 or 15 mins went by and we had not heard anything and so my assistant called back. All the while I am still helping him struggle through coughing. She doesn't answer her cell AGAIN. A couple mins later she texts my cell and says the dad is on his way. Can you believe that?! My reaction would have been, "I am on my way!" I would have shot out the door and not cared what anyone said or thought! My child is #1! NOT any job. I don't care what my job was. So, I am hearing now that she is bad mouthing me to anyone who will listen. I am doing this to safeguard all of the kids. I guess he went to the doc last night and something was wrong and he has to go back again today, but she won't say what is wrong. If there is something contagious, doesn't she need to tell me so that I can warn the other parents?! They are always bringing their kids sick. In the last few weeks I have sent the baby home sick at least once a week! He has been miserable and their #1 has been "we can't miss work". I understand that stress, but no matter what, nothing will EVER be more important than my kids!
You're the provider I NEED. I can't believe this woman! My son went into respiratory arrest multiple times when he was under 2 yo and I was still doing child care. I went broke because I didn't think anyone else knew how to handle his apnea episodes! He's 4 1/2 and I'm STILL scared but I have finally just begun to trust someone with him a couple times a week so I can work. He hasn't stopped breathing to the point he used to since age 3 1/2, but still! He also almost died in 2008 after coming out of a surgery. I didn't work the next 2 weeks. Yes, I lost money...but I refuse to think about what would happen if I had lost my son. He's FIRST. I would probably ask this woman what's up with the kid, is this contagious since there are OTHER kids in your care, and if she's nonchalant and neglectful, report her ass to CPS!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
emergencies, emergency contact, emergency plan, emergency preparedness plan, respiratory syncytial virus

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Licensed DayCare vs. Private DayCare marylmr Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 60 02-24-2020 12:20 PM
How Long Should 4 Year Old Nap Unregistered Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 314 02-13-2018 04:48 AM
Termination Gone Wrong MsKara Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 107 03-11-2015 02:09 PM
Death in CA Home Daycare -Please Help Unregistered Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 18 06-07-2011 12:04 PM
22 month old hysterical about going to daycare A Mama Parents and Guardians Forum 9 06-02-2009 09:19 PM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:59 AM.



Daycare.com         Find A Daycare         List Your Daycare         Toys & Products                 About Us

Daycare.com
Please read our Disclaimer before continuing.

Topics pertain mainly to the following States:

Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware District of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming