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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potty Trained???
Unregistered 01:29 PM 02-23-2012
So I recently added a new boy to my group. He is 2y9m. Mother says he has been potty trained for 7 months now, and his last accident was 3 months ago when he wet the bed, which he doesn't wet the bed anymore either.

1st day here he has 2 accidents. Mother is bewildered. How could this happen?? Oh my. 2nd day, 3 accidents. I suggest to her he may have a UTI. She sets up an appointment. 3rd Day. 4 accidents. 5th Day. 3 accidents.

I have explained to him where both pottys are, and that he needs to let me know when he has to potty. He will literally pee on himself and then come tell me "I have to go potty" Not only that but he pooped himself twice.

Just an example of one day. During Clean up time He has an accident. Potty is literally in the activity room. I change him and make him potty again. Then we go and they sit down to watch tv so I can prep lunch. 15 min later, accident. I take him potty and also make him go again. They eat lunch. Approx. 25-30 min. I take him out of the booster and he is soaking wet. I asked him if he spilled something on him and no. He had an accident. I litterally dont know how he had that much fluid in his tiny body to go that many times.

So, I have been watering down all his juice, and I have him rotate water between juice.

Friday he goes to doc. He has a UTI, but mommy is saying no accidents at home all weekend. Not even at night. ( He has had 2 nap time accidents here).

Monday, 3 accidents. Tuesday, I made a sticker chart, he is super excited, and goes to bathroom all day with no accidents Yay! Wednesday, he has 1 accident abt 10 min before pick up time, so Im thinking real progress. Today (Thurs) 2 accidents within 20 min of each other. With bathroom time in between.

Whats up? Is this child really potty trained or am I just being fed a line of bull and mommy doesnt want to do the work. She said last daycare provider never had any problems with him having accidents that the only reason she left there was b/c she is changing to infant only daycare.

What are your thoughts on this?
cheerfuldom 01:50 PM 02-23-2012
First of all, ask for the previous daycare provider's number and call yourself.

Secondly, insist on pull ups until he is shows that he can be accident free at your daycare. Cleaning up all that pee and poop is a sanitation issue and you cannot allow him to be pottying in the equipment, all over the floor, etc. If the parent will not provide pullups then purchase them yourselves and charge her for them.

I would bet that they are doing the "every 30 minute" thing at home and at the previous provider and that this child is not completely potty trained and cannot tell you that he has to go before he goes. Or maybe she is straight out lying to you. Sometimes kids do regress in pottying but to me, this seems excessive.
Ariana 01:54 PM 02-23-2012
Sounds like the mom or previous DCP was taking the boy at regular intervals to pee which can look like he's PT'd when he actually isn't. This ensures that he has no idea when he needs to pee and when he needs to go to the toilet.
Unregistered 02:06 PM 02-23-2012
I have tried having him go evey 30-45 min. He cries and screams that he doesn't need to go. So I tell him he only has to try but he continues to cry and then starts "I want my mommy I want my daddy" over and over. So I literally have to take his pants down for him and then he wont aim and pees on whatever b/c he is upset that he has to go
daycare 02:16 PM 02-23-2012
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have tried having him go evey 30-45 min. He cries and screams that he doesn't need to go. So I tell him he only has to try but he continues to cry and then starts "I want my mommy I want my daddy" over and over. So I literally have to take his pants down for him and then he wont aim and pees on whatever b/c he is upset that he has to go
I agree with the PP sounds like its time for a plastic pant over the undies or pull up over the undies. You can't let a child eliminate waste all of your Daycare or house. It is just not sanitary for anyone.....

Sorry, but I think the mom is trying to pull wool over your eyes.
Mom&Provider 02:17 PM 02-23-2012
This is either a case of regession or he was never potty trained completely to begin with...hard to tell which one, since either would lead to accidents.

I'd tell DCM all the accidents he's had, I'm sure you have already, and tell her if they continue into next week she'll have to bring diapers/pull-ups for you to use while he is in your care until he gets used to using the potty at the daycare with fewer/no accidents.
SunshineMama 09:12 AM 02-24-2012
Before I was a provider, I sent my daughter to another provider.

She was potty trained, accident free, for over a year. Literally no accidents. When she was at the provider's house, she had accidents almost every day for 4 weeks. Of course, I blamed the provider, (before I knew any better), but really, I think looking back, that my daughter was maybe afraid to speak up or something. Not sure. I am sure the OP thought I lied about her being potty trained, but she seriously was completely potty trained, and would go for me and other family members all the time, no problem.

But, yes, a child can be totally potty trained and have accidents at a new provider's. It happened to my own child.
nannyde 10:09 AM 02-24-2012
Unfortunately, parental lying or exaggeration is highest in potty training second only to health.

There's a chance that he has never been potty trained and that she left the previous provider because the provider refused to allow underwear. We've seen a number of examples of parents leaving without notice over providers refusing to allow underwear just in the last couple of weeks here.

I would tell them that you need the name and number of the previous provider so that you can call and get assistance for how she managed it at her house. If he has been trained for seven months at day care she should be able to tell you within a few minutes how she is making that happen. If they balk about giving her info to you or changing the story line you will have a good idea they are intentionally lying to you.
countrymom 10:17 AM 02-24-2012
yes, ask for the number, tell mom that maybe she can help you. I find it odd that the other provider would switch to all infant, are there no laws about it.
Heidi 10:21 AM 02-24-2012
My sister had her daughter completely potty trained AT HOME by 22 months. She could also go on errands and to grandma's and be just fine.

She went on vacation, and it was nothing but accidents for my niece and frustration for my sister.

Once home, they settled back into their routine, and tada! she was "trained" again.

Different environment=adjustment period. You are a stranger, he is in a strange place, and that's harder for some kids than others.

Have him wear pullups over his underwear for sanitation, check with him when you can, have him go before an activity change like going outside or nap (I assume everyone else does then anyway, so you're not singling him out).

If he's wet, give him the responsibility of changing himself (in a very non-judgmental, matter-of-fact way). This is HIS responsibility, not yours. Of course, if he's soiled, you have to help him, but do the minimum (for sanitation), dump what you can in the toilet "where it belongs", put the soiled pants in a bag, and let him do the rest.

He needs to miss out on a few activities because he has to change his clothes, take a little time to adjust, and he will get it quick enough.
Unregistered 12:33 PM 02-24-2012
Thank you to all who have responded. I am slowly trying to sort out the reasoning and I belive it may be a mixture of a lot of things.

DCM said last night that he was the oldest of the children at his last daycare, but she told me before that the last daycare provider was switching to all infants and that he could have kept going to her but she didn't feel that he would learn anything there. Well if he was the oldest then the other provider wouldn't have had to change much.

I also asked her about the structure of the other childcare because I am very structured at my home. They have circle time, they work in their curriculum books, they do art, they have nap, they have free play, they do flashcards, outdoor time. Basically they are busy throughout the day.

My thoughts are that he is kinda potty trained. The last provider probably kept him in pull ups and I am not so sure that they did much with him so he may have just "wandered" throughout the day. I am pretty sure that he just watched t.v.

My assumptions on this are because last week I had my ever awful monthly visitor and I have one terrible day where I dont feel like I can move from cramping. So if this happens to be a weekday then this has become our hang out and chill out day and I hate to say it but mostly watch t.v. I do the bare minimal to survive, Im not joking. I even try to make my husband stay home with me. With that being said, DCB knows every theme song to every cartoon that I put on starting with Chuggington at 6:30am. He knows the theme songs by heart and sings them loudly. Caillou, mickey mouse, dinosaur train, and some I couldn't even tell you b/c we dont normally watch that many cartoons. My others normally get to watch Your Baby Can read, Sid the Science Kid, and/or Caillou.

I think staying so busy and having fun may be leading into him not wanting to stop to go potty. but DCM (She is a high school teacher) says that the last place was very structured and that he did activities and learned all day and that she would never have allowed him to stay there if it were not just as structured as my program. Okay, he didn't even understand the concept of coloring, I had to teach him how to put his crayon on the paper and such. He would just pick them up and break them, stick them in his ear, bite them, you get the picture.

Not only that but they contacted me on a Monday, couldn't set up an appointment until Friday and then switched it to sat, and needed to start him on Monday, So seeing all of your comments it is really all starting to spell out to me whats wrong. How could I have been so blind to it in the first place.

Thank You. And no accidents today. They are sleeping. Hopefully we are good and I just have to keep reinforcing the potty and telling him to tell me. Reminding him to go at least every hour. If not it's pull-ups on Monday and I have his size in stock. I will let his mom know tonight.
countrymom 04:05 PM 02-24-2012
its easy not to realize the problems till you write things out, happens all the time. I love parents who tell me their kids don't watch tv but they know all the songs. Hmm what channel is sid the science kid on, my niece loves it.
Unregistered 05:11 PM 02-24-2012
Here it is on PBS which is channel 8 and it comes on at 10am. But I normally just DVR it so we can have it when t.v. time is designated. It is not on On Demand. Im in Houston so not sure how the channel difference is.
Tags:potty trained - not
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