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Old 07-16-2013, 07:57 AM
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Default Ticked Me Off This Morning

This morning the mom of my dcg5 has decided to start bringing her lunch because dcg complained about having to eat green beans yesterday. So not only is there a note with this bowl of food I'm supposed to warm up for her for lunch but now she wants me to give dcg morning snack as well. I've never served morning snack. Breakfast is between 8-8:45, lunch is between 11-11:45 and afternoon snack is at 2. I know if I serve her a morning snack all the other kids will want one and no one will want to eat lunch. So sorry mom not going to happen. We'll see what happens at pickup this afternoon
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:05 AM
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Do you normally allow kids to bring their own lunches?

I could never allow that as I provide lunch (and snacks) and I serve ALL the kids the SAME thing.

I know some providers have parents supply lunches but I was just curious what your normal routine was...

Also curious, what's in the child's lunch? Is it anything nutritious or anything with veggies?
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:13 AM
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I have never had a parent bring a lunch before and was thrown off by it. I always serve a main type of food and a veggie and a fruit. Her bowl looks like it has pasta and sauce and cheese in it. It will be tough at lunch trying to explain why she has something different than everyone else. She usually eats well for me. Her dad has said she eats better here than at home so I don't really know whats up with the mom. We'll have to talk at pickup today. And the mom sent nothing for her other kids.
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:27 AM
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Originally Posted by sally View Post
I have never had a parent bring a lunch before and was thrown off by it. I always serve a main type of food and a veggie and a fruit. Her bowl looks like it has pasta and sauce and cheese in it. It will be tough at lunch trying to explain why she has something different than everyone else. She usually eats well for me. Her dad has said she eats better here than at home so I don't really know whats up with the mom. We'll have to talk at pickup today. And the mom sent nothing for her other kids.
Stop this dead in it's tracks or you'll be doing special ALL the time.

I tell all parents that I serve according to the food program. No outside food is allowed. EVER.
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:36 AM
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Originally Posted by sally View Post
This morning the mom of my dcg5 has decided to start bringing her lunch because dcg complained about having to eat green beans yesterday. So not only is there a note with this bowl of food I'm supposed to warm up for her for lunch but now she wants me to give dcg morning snack as well. I've never served morning snack. Breakfast is between 8-8:45, lunch is between 11-11:45 and afternoon snack is at 2. I know if I serve her a morning snack all the other kids will want one and no one will want to eat lunch. So sorry mom not going to happen. We'll see what happens at pickup this afternoon
I had a DCM that did this occasionally and every time I sent it home untouched til she finally got the hint that I was serious about no outside food. This DCM would send 2 bags of chips, candy, fruit snacks, chocolate milk, and cheese sandwich (plus dcb was supposedly lactose intolerant ). Definitely not something I feed the other kids and it would just cause issues so he never got it.
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:39 AM
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OP are you on the food program?
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Old 07-16-2013, 09:00 AM
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Not at this time I'm not but I do follow a lot of the guidelines. I try to make sure we have very healthy lunches. Every once in a while on a Friday when I have less kids we might have a fun lunch. I think this bowl will stay in the fridge and I'll give it to mom at pickup and tell her sorry but all kids eat the same thing.
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Old 07-16-2013, 09:11 AM
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Not at this time I'm not but I do follow a lot of the guidelines. I try to make sure we have very healthy lunches. Every once in a while on a Friday when I have less kids we might have a fun lunch. I think this bowl will stay in the fridge and I'll give it to mom at pickup and tell her sorry but all kids eat the same thing.
I was just thinking you could use the food program as an excuse as to why you won't allow DCG to bring her own meals/snacks....

If you are licensed, you could always say that you have to serve everyone the same....

Or you could just say to mom that it is just way too difficult to manage the issues bringing her own food creates with the others.

The child is certainly not going to starve if she skips eating a full lunch at your house (if she doesn't like something) and the parents can just make sure she gets a good healthy and hearty dinner.
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:01 AM
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Iand the parents can just make sure she gets a good healthy and hearty dinner.
do you manage to say/type/think these things with a straight face? I'm being a bit facetious, of course, but we all know that parents rarely feed their kids as well as we would like or they lead us to believe
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:03 AM
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Not at this time I'm not but I do follow a lot of the guidelines. I try to make sure we have very healthy lunches. Every once in a while on a Friday when I have less kids we might have a fun lunch. I think this bowl will stay in the fridge and I'll give it to mom at pickup and tell her sorry but all kids eat the same thing.
That is what I would do as well.

Tell mom you didn't say anything this morning because you were surprised by the change, but you're sure she understands that you aren't willing to open that can of worms.
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:06 AM
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do you manage to say/type/think these things with a straight face? I'm being a bit facetious, of course, but we all know that parents rarely feed their kids as well as we would like or they lead us to believe
I know for a fact they do not eat well at home. For a while they kept a notebook of all dcg ate at home and I would write in what she had eaten here. From breakfast all the way til 10 pm at home it was nothing but juice, spagetti o's, hotdogs, chicken nuggets, cake, ice cream, pizza... the healthiest things she ate was mashed potatoes and gravy.
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:09 AM
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That is what I would do as well.

Tell mom you didn't say anything this morning because you were surprised by the change, but you're sure she understands that you aren't willing to open that can of worms.


Laurel
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:09 AM
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I know for a fact they do not eat well at home. For a while they kept a notebook of all dcg ate at home and I would write in what she had eaten here. From breakfast all the way til 10 pm at home it was nothing but juice, spagetti o's, hotdogs, chicken nuggets, cake, ice cream, pizza... the healthiest things she ate was mashed potatoes and gravy.
I had a family that led me to believe that at home they were exclusively paleo/primal, no grains, all organic, etc etc etc.

Then I found out that dcb is VERY familiar with McD's.
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Old 07-16-2013, 10:37 AM
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Originally Posted by SilverSabre25 View Post
do you manage to say/type/think these things with a straight face? I'm being a bit facetious, of course, but we all know that parents rarely feed their kids as well as we would like or they lead us to believe
Oh, trust me....I am laughing while I type because I KNOW all too well that what a parent SAYS and what a parent DOES is two completely different things....

However, I do what I need to do on my watch and the parents can do whatever they need to do on their watch....just so long as their demands don't bleed onto my watch.
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Old 07-16-2013, 11:05 AM
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Stop this dead in it's tracks or you'll be doing special ALL the time.

I tell all parents that I serve according to the food program. No outside food is allowed. EVER.
this

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Old 07-16-2013, 11:11 AM
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Not at this time I'm not but I do follow a lot of the guidelines. I try to make sure we have very healthy lunches. Every once in a while on a Friday when I have less kids we might have a fun lunch. I think this bowl will stay in the fridge and I'll give it to mom at pickup and tell her sorry but all kids eat the same thing.
I recommend you find a food program. Your already serving the same way that food program does and you will be reimbursed to help with your food cost.

Unless this child has an allergy I would serve her what the other kids are having. I would tell Mom at pick up that bringing her own lunch is not going to work for you. If you feel she does not eat well at lunch you can agree to tell the mom at pick up but other then that I would stick to what you have been doing and it sounds like you have it all figured out anyway. Seriously look into the food program it is worth the small amount of paper work you have to do for it.

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Old 07-16-2013, 11:17 AM
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Originally Posted by SilverSabre25 View Post
do you manage to say/type/think these things with a straight face? I'm being a bit facetious, of course, but we all know that parents rarely feed their kids as well as we would like or they lead us to believe
I don't know about this. My parents do. I also think the obesity rate in the USA in kids shows that parents are feeding the kiddo's but just not the healthy stuff or too much of it. Except for one parent that I had my parents all feed the kids well and healthy. Right now I am on the lucky side of things, has not always been that way. My parents are always amazed when I tell them what the kids are eating for lunch. The appreciate me feeding them well and introducing them to different foods.

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Old 07-16-2013, 11:20 AM
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I know for a fact they do not eat well at home. For a while they kept a notebook of all dcg ate at home and I would write in what she had eaten here. From breakfast all the way til 10 pm at home it was nothing but juice, spagetti o's, hotdogs, chicken nuggets, cake, ice cream, pizza... the healthiest things she ate was mashed potatoes and gravy.
your in a great and wonderful place to educate these parents and being on the food program is a great help to facilitate that also- Hand outs, talking to parents about what the child ate at daycare- Little daycare gal, loved loved loved string beans for snack today. Do you give her those at home? Pops the idea into moms head that snacks can be other things besides junk food. Then again if the parent doesn't have good eating habits most likely the kids won't either.

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Old 07-16-2013, 03:29 PM
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well I talked to the mom at pickup and it didn't go over well with her. She wasn't too happy but I did stick to my guns. So dcg will have what everyone else has again from now on. I did try to tell her dcg seems to like almost all the fruits and veggies I serve. Also found out the mom thinks my healthy snacks are bs. She says snacks are supposed to be candy or junkfood. WOW
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Old 07-16-2013, 03:33 PM
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well I talked to the mom at pickup and it didn't go over well with her. She wasn't too happy but I did stick to my guns. So dcg will have what everyone else has again from now on. I did try to tell her dcg seems to like almost all the fruits and veggies I serve. Also found out the mom thinks my healthy snacks are bs. She says snacks are supposed to be candy or junkfood. WOW
Oh boy!

Mom seems to have "snack" mixed up with "treat".

Good job sticking to your guns!
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Old 07-16-2013, 03:35 PM
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I think what would bother me is that the mom is sending the wrong message to the child.....What is mom going to do the next time you do something DCG does not like.......I would not be ok that mom was not supportive of my program....Meal time is part of it...
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Old 07-16-2013, 05:24 PM
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I think what would bother me is that the mom is sending the wrong message to the child.....What is mom going to do the next time you do something DCG does not like.......I would not be ok that mom was not supportive of my program....Meal time is part of it...
I agree.

I helped a family term themselves last year because of something similar. Dad came in and said, "My daughter doesn't want to come here because of what you serve." I said, "That's funny, because she eats it all." with a straight face.
He wanted us to make her a different meal or serve her a PB&J sandwich if she didn't like something. No, sorry. That isn't going to happen.
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Old 07-18-2013, 02:36 PM
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UPDATE... The dad talked to the mom and I guess even dcg told mom she likes eating what her friends eat and mom spent a few minutes talking with me today at pickup. I told her dcg really likes cottage cheese and mom was surprised but even said she's happy I'm introducing dcg to new foods. Shocked but happy this is working out better.
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Old 07-18-2013, 05:54 PM
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UPDATE... The dad talked to the mom and I guess even dcg told mom she likes eating what her friends eat and mom spent a few minutes talking with me today at pickup. I told her dcg really likes cottage cheese and mom was surprised but even said she's happy I'm introducing dcg to new foods. Shocked but happy this is working out better.
Sounds great! Hopefully you can get the family on board with YOU instead of the other way around. Maybe you can write down what you serve DCG and in what quantities to help out DCM?
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  #25  
Old 07-23-2013, 09:50 PM
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Only ONE child is allowed outside food at my home, and it's because he has a doctor's note (Celiac & allergies).

WAS the child forced or coerced to eat green beans? At my house, I plate the food, set it in front of the kids, and it sits in front of them for 20 minutes. If they choose not to eat it, they don't have to. I TRY to accommodate their preferences when I can, but if they don't eat it, they don't.

I'd let mom know that you can't serve the child food from home because it's not allowed by the food program, and let her know that you would never force her child to eat anything, but you will not remove green beans from your menu for her, either.
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