Would you talk to the bus driver?

[Soccermom]

I have a 9 year old DCG who got off the bus this afternoon saying that a boy on the bus was kicking and hitting her. She also said he pulled her finger back. My own DD witnessed it. She tried to laugh it off saying her friend thinks he must like her but he is 10 and should know better than to hurt a girl. I could tell she was upset though and her finger is quite red and a little swollen.

I have told DCG that she needs to talk to her parents about it when she gets home but should I offer to talk to the bus driver since I see her 4 times a day and the DCP does not.

What to you think? These school agers all come to me for help and I want them to know I have their best interest at heart but I don't want to overstep my bounds, KWIM?

[Second Home]

I hear things like this all the time . I tell the kids they have to tell their parents or I tell the parents what their child has told me , depending on the age of the child or what the incident was ..

On the bus they are still under the responsibility of the school , the parent would need to call the school or transportation dept to file a complaint . I feel that the school will not give you any information regarding the child and what happens at school so you should also not be the one to contact the school about the problem . That should be the parent.

[CraftyMom]

My daughter, 6, has a friend on the bus that was hurting her. They really are friends, but he is rambunctious boy. (They've been in the same class last year and this year and we've seen him at the park a couple of times so I've seen for myself) He apparently thought he was being funny, giving her noogies, and high fives that sting for example. Just being rough.

At first I told her to tell him that it hurts and ask him to stop. That didn't work. So I told her to switch seats if he sat near her. He just followed her.

By the 3rd week of school this year I spoke with the bus driver and asked that she make sure he doesn't sit near her. I explained that they are friends in school, but her gets rough trying to play and it hurts her.

My daughter said the VP at school spoke with him about it, so the bus driver must have spoken to the VP. (or maybe there were several complaints)

My daughter said he no longer tries to sit near her and has had no complaints since

[e.j.]

I would speak to her parents, let them know what's going on and then let them handle the situation. I think more is apt to be done if the complaint comes from the parent anyway.

[KDC]

I would also let the parent handle it with the transportation department. I have a 9 yr. old and I would want to be the one to call, or speak with my daughter to see what she would prefer. This sounds like a call to transportation is warranted. Sometimes we're mama bears for our daycare kids just as we are our own children (and it pains me to see how some parents blow it off, like - oh, just bus drama and she'll be fine).

There was a kindergartner picking on my DS (also in Kindi). He would pull on his shirt and call him jerk boy. My son would ask me to talk to the bus driver and I though about it, I know the bus driver gets a LOT of complaints, so I though hmmm... how could we take care of this without getting the driver involved. We role played and went through different scenarios which included ignoring, asking him to stop with a firm voice, threaten to tell the bus driver, telling the boy the video camera on the bus would show his bad behavior and he would get in trouble. The next day I asked him how it went and he said he fixed it! I was like, how??? He said, It was my turn for calendar and I asked him to be the helper, so now he know's I'm nice and he'll be nice to me. And so far so good on the bus. Sometimes they just need space to figure it out on their own.

[Josiegirl]

Originally Posted by KDC

I would also let the parent handle it with the transportation department. I have a 9 yr. old and I would want to be the one to call, or speak with my daughter to see what she would prefer. This sounds like a call to transportation is warranted. Sometimes we're mama bears for our daycare kids just as we are our own children (and it pains me to see how some parents blow it off, like - oh, just bus drama and she'll be fine).

There was a kindergartner picking on my DS (also in Kindi). He would pull on his shirt and call him jerk boy. My son would ask me to talk to the bus driver and I though about it, I know the bus driver gets a LOT of complaints, so I though hmmm... how could we take care of this without getting the driver involved. We role played and went through different scenarios which included ignoring, asking him to stop with a firm voice, threaten to tell the bus driver, telling the boy the video camera on the bus would show his bad behavior and he would get in trouble. The next day I asked him how it went and he said he fixed it! I was like, how??? He said, It was my turn for calendar and I asked him to be the helper, so now he know's I'm nice and he'll be nice to me. And so far so good on the bus. Sometimes they just need space to figure it out on their own.

What a smart little guy ya have there!!!

I'm in the 'tell the dcps and hope they get it straightened out'. Why can kids on the bus be so mean sometimes? My 3 always had some trouble at some point.

[DaveA]

I would tell the parents about it and let them handle it. Technically they are not in your care yet, so it should be between the school and the parents.

[cheerfuldom]

no I would not get involved. Last thing you need is the parents to think that you will be handling school transportation issues. mention it to mom and let them take care of it.