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Old 12-15-2014, 10:06 AM
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Default Families That Don't Do Santa

I have a family this year that doesn't do Santa. They celebrate the holidays but don't do Santa.

This child has no idea about Santa so there is no "Believing" in him. Not sure how to handle this.

We are starting to do stories, crafts, and different areas with Santa in them. How would you guys go about explaining Santa to this child since it is something the family doesn't do? I don't want to say he is real but not sure how to explain who he is to this child.

I'm finding more people not doing Santa it seems. We had two people at church actually say something about there being no Easter Bunny and no Santa. I cringed big time because some people do participate in it with their children.
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Old 12-15-2014, 10:16 AM
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Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I have a family this year that doesn't do Santa. They celebrate the holidays but don't do Santa.

This child has no idea about Santa so there is no "Believing" in him. Not sure how to handle this.

We are starting to do stories, crafts, and different areas with Santa in them. How would you guys go about explaining Santa to this child since it is something the family doesn't do? I don't want to say he is real but not sure how to explain who he is to this child.

I'm finding more people not doing Santa it seems. We had two people at church actually say something about there being no Easter Bunny and no Santa. I cringed big time because some people do participate in it with their children.
I just don't editorialize about Santa; he is a character in a book. Just like Knuffle Bunny, or a hungry caterpillar. I don't tell kids I believe or don't believe in any other characters
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Old 12-15-2014, 10:18 AM
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If it was me, I would sit the family down and explain to them that you "Do" and that you have some activities planned that do include Santa. Then I would suggest the following"

A- have an activity for the child to do while you are doing your Santa themed activity

B- have them pick up their child before you start the activity

C- They need to explain to there child well enough that some people believe and some don't and they can still have fun and participate, but know that they believe in something different.

Then after a plan is put into place, I would go from there. I would leave it up to the family.
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Old 12-15-2014, 10:29 AM
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My response is "Different families believe different things and that's okay!" or "they are real to those who believe"
Another provider I know has sent out a letter in the past basically saying that she understands each family has their own traditions, but the parents should make it clear to their kids that it's not their job to tell other kids there is/is not a Santa.

IME, even in families that don't "do" Santa, the kids still kind of know what Santa is (or supposed to be) and have just as much fun reading books, doing crafts, etc. I wouldn't change anything up if you have plans. I have moved away from Santa and company only because I find the kids get so, well frankly obnoxious this time of year (I know, I know, sue me) so I tend to focus more on giving with them.

True story - When I was first doing day care I had a family who didn't do Santa or the Easter Bunny, etc. Fine. At Christmas time this child stood up at the lunch table and told all the kids there was no such thing as Santa. I did the "he's real to those who believe" line. All fine and good, because of course she still got Christmas presents. Then Easter came and she did the same thing at the lunch table. I did the standard "he's real to those who believe" line. Monday after Easter when kids were talking about Easter baskets, who's in tears because she didn't get one I always think of that when parents proudly proclaim "we don't do Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy."
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Old 12-15-2014, 10:40 AM
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My sister never did Santa with her daughter. Of course my niece knew the word Santa.

One other thing my sister forgot to do::: teach her daughter that some DO believe and not to start verbal arguments with little kids who believe.

I don't have a problem with parents not wanting their kids to believe in Santa. But just like everything else, the child should be taught to respect the beliefs of others. If they are old enough to understand there isn't a Santa, they are old enough to be taught that others do believe and to respect that.
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Old 12-15-2014, 11:50 AM
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I have a neighbor that doesn't do Santa or the Easter Bunny. First year we were in the neighborhood we had a knock on our door Easter morning. It was them and they were giving out Chinese New Year cards. They wanted to come in but our children were sick with strep throat. I found it to be an awkward time for an unannounced visit.
Now year after year they come by and they are requesting that we don't mention the Easter bunny. I'm sorry. Cant do that if you are stopping by on Easter morning at my home.
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Old 12-15-2014, 01:39 PM
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Originally Posted by SignMeUp View Post
I just don't editorialize about Santa; he is a character in a book. Just like Knuffle Bunny, or a hungry caterpillar. I don't tell kids I believe or don't believe in any other characters
Yep, me too.
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Old 12-15-2014, 02:20 PM
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Our family doesn't do Santa or the Easter Bunny or whatever. My son gets presents and Easter baskets. He's 2.5, so he's heard of Santa, but I think Santa is like Elmo to him... A character he's aware of, from a TV show he hasn't watched, and that he has little interest in.

The daycare kids talk about Santa a little, but I don't get in their conversations. They're too young to even be talking about whether or not he exists. When that time comes, I plan to teach my son to be respectful of others' beliefs.

We don't do Santa stuff here. We have a ton of Christmas stuff, and the kids don't seem to notice or miss it.

I'd personally try to do more reindeer, snowman, penguin, etc. themed stuff with the non-santa kid. Or ask his parents if they're OK with a little Santa here and there!
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Old 12-17-2014, 07:23 PM
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My husband and I were talking about whether to tell our 3 year old about Santa or not, but before we could he asked if Santa is real and I couldn't lie and say yes. So, we talked about how Santa is pretend like his superheros and favorite Disney characters, but he's a fun part of Christmas. We also told him it's ok if other kids think Santa is real, but we don't need to take away the fun and tell them he's pretend. My daycare kids talk about Santa and so far so good.

Then, we talked to our son about the real meaning of Christmas and told him about St. Nicholas who was real and did very good things for people. We still read books with Santa in them and color pages and such.
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Old 12-17-2014, 07:41 PM
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May i ask those of you that have chosen to not believe, how did you come to that decision? Is it solely based on religion?
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Old 12-17-2014, 07:55 PM
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May i ask those of you that have chosen to not believe, how did you come to that decision? Is it solely based on religion?
I grew up in a house that believed in Santa and so did my husband. My husband said when he found out Santa wasn't real, it was devastating and he had wondered why his parents lied to him, so he felt very strongly that he didn't want to do that to our son.

It was also based on our religious beliefs. We don't forbid Santa in our house or tell our son Santa is bad. We just choose to focus on the real meaning of Christmas and we still do a ton of fun things so we don't feel like he's really missing out on anything. Honestly, I think he'd be scared to go to the mall and see Santa.

We were in a store a few weeks ago, before we talked to him about Santa, and someone told him he better be good because Santa is going to come down his chimney and leave presents and my son says, "Umm...No he's not."
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Old 12-17-2014, 08:05 PM
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I think I would handle it like Signmeup said. I wouldn't push the concept of Santa being someone that we believe really goes around putting toys under trees in people's houses on Christmas Eve. I would treat it more like any other fictional character, like Barney, Mickey Mouse, or Elmo. Now a days, kids are so used to seeing characters on TV and even in person that it wouldn't be hard for the child to think that Santa is just another character from a storybook or TV show.

The problem, I think, will be when they come back after Christmas and start talking about the toys that Santa left them under their tree and that child sitting there wondering why Santa didn't leave him anything under a tree. That is, if he's old enough to understand what they are talking about.

I also have realized that a lot of people have stopped telling their children that Santa, the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. are 'real'. Honestly, I don't know how I feel about that. I think it's sad that the child isn't allowed that fantasy of magic and wonder. But at the same time, as long as the child is told the truth of what started the concept of the character, and how we now carry on the tradition, I think, maybe, it's okay to not let them have that fantasy.

This link tells you the history of the Easter Bunny.
http://news.discovery.com/history/wh...ter-120406.htm

Here's one for Santa Claus
http://www.unmuseum.org/santa.htm

And here's one for the Tooth Fairy
http://www.fountainviewsmiles.com/hi...oth-fairy.html

However, I'm not quite sure that you would want to teach the history of the tooth fairy to a child until they are well into their teens!
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Old 12-17-2014, 09:03 PM
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We celebrate Christmas without Santa. I'm not trying to take the magic away, it's just very important to me that nothing takes the glory away from Jesus. Mostly as a parent I wouldn't want someone to tell my kids that Santa doesn't go to naughty kids houses, because I don't want them to think that's why they don't get presents from Santa. I still lie to my kids and say that santa goes to their cousins house but I asked Santa to skip our house. DS is good with that explanation for now, he's 4.
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