Underwear and Borrowing Clothes

I am located in New Jersey if that makes any difference.

I am working at a "Montessori" daycare with kids between the ages of 2.5 and 5. Today, one of the four year olds had an accident (while awake; she mentioned that it hurt 'down there' so I suspect she might be in the early stages of a UTI or something. I plan to keep an eye on her over the next few days.

As she didn't have a change of clothes, she had to borrow from a "friend." Now, I suspect it might be a cultural thing (98% of the kids are Indian), but I noticed that some of the girls- including this one- don't wear underpants.

However, while going commando in your OWN clothes might be perfectly fine as long as the child is toilet-trained enough to not have accidents that will lead to puddles etc., I can't imagine it would be the same for wearing someone else's clothes. In every daycare I have ever worked at, if a child has to borrow clothes from someone because s/he doesn't have any spare clothes, the child has to put on a pull-up for sanitary purposes under the borrowed pants until his/her clothes are washed/dried (if laundry facilities are available), a parent brings a change of clothes, or the child goes home (with instructions to wash and return the borrowed clothes and bring his/her own change of clothes).

My coworker let the child wear the borrowed pants without a pull-up because she cried about it. I honestly felt bad for her, and I tried to give her as much privacy as possible when helping her change. I understand why, at four years old, she wouldn't want to wear a pull-up (and the fact that she wasn't wearing underpants made it doubly confusing), but I was standing firm on the pull-up in lieu of underwear with borrowed pants. My coworker gave in.

So, what is your policy on borrowed clothes- specifically pants when a child has an accident and doesn't have any extra pants or underwear?

[Georgiads]

Call the parents to pick up or bring clothes. Have your own company extras for the kid to wear while they wait. It's not right to use another child's personal belongings.

[Josiegirl]

I have random clothes here for dcks who need them. Sometimes they've had to go commando with those but I also wouldn't use others' extras. If that 1 child didn't have any clothes, I'd call the dcps to bring some and make sure I always have extras on hand.

[laundrymom]

I would have called for pickup if she had no extras. Or gone w a pull-up no pants if she wasn't bothered by it. Some kids care. Some don't. No way i would share.

[DaveA]

I have a box of thrift store/ garage sale clothes in various kids size's "just in case". Otherwise use a pull up or go commando. I wouldn't use another DCK's clothes. Knowing my luck that would me the day they were needed.

[storybookending]

I also have a box on extra clothes while requiring that each child has an extra set of clothes, including socks. Most kids have more than one extra. I would not use an outfit of another child enrolled. I have had to use one of my own outfits only a few times. Once when a 6 month old spit up on all THREE of this extra outfits an once when his sister wet the bed. I’m unsure why she didn’t have extra clothes in her drawer.. I was actually thinking of selling the extras I have. I sold the babygirl clothes last week. My “boy” stuff is dated and not in the best shape though but there’s like 3 bags it’s sitting in my closet.

[Blackcat31]

I don't and won't keep spare clothing items here.

Children are REQUIRED to have a back up set of clothing.
A FULL set (including socks and underwear).

The operative word here is "required".

If a child is not fully prepared for the day, they are not allowed attendance for the day.

If however, a child did arrive without spare clothing and I didn't notice immediately and they needed spares during the day, I'd call the parent for immediate pick up.

Their (parent) failure to provide for their child, as required, is not my issue to manage.

[MarinaVanessa]

I wouldn't allow one child to borrow another child's clothes without asking the parent's permission. Regardless of wether or not the child is wearing underwear I, as a parent, would't want another child wearing the clothes that I purchased for my child, that I worked to pay for, that my daycare was risking possibly not having it returned or returned damaged/stained.

I keep extra clothes on hand. I don't keep extra underwear though. The extra clothes that I have are gender neutral khaki shorts, khaki pants and white tshirts. If a child doesn't have an extra change of clothes I'll use mine but I let the parent know to bring clothes at pickup (one set for the child to wear and one set to keep here) and I change the child into their own clothes at pick up. My clothes does not leave my daycare, I've had too many sets not return.

I'd be pretty peeved if something happened to my child's clothes because my daycare loaned them to someone else.

[Cat Herder]

Kids don't share personal belongings.

I would have changed her into my own loaner clothing if I had failed to enforce my spare clothing policy.

How often do you check the kids personal cubbies for required supplies? Who's responsibility is it to enforce the policy?

Maybe solving those issues, between you two, can prevent issues like this from happening again.

[Snowmom]

I'd be pretty peeved if my child's spare clothing were used on another child without my permission.

The elementary schools here ask parents every fall for clothing donations for the school nurse to be used for instances exactly like this. Maybe that's the route to go?

[HappyEverAfter]

I would never let a child borrow another child's clothes. As a parent I would be furious if another child wore my child's clothing home. What if the borrower forgets to return it or ruins them somehow or what if my child needed those same clothes later in the same day? My rule is that each child must provide a change of clothes that stays here. Two changes of clothes if they're potty training or an infant. If something happened such as change of clothes not being replenished after use and a child needed clothes to change into then the parents would have to bring clothes or come get the child.

[hwichlaz]

I'm not seeing how it's unsanitary as long as they are washed between uses....

[hwichlaz]

Underwear issue aside...

I'd not be lending other children's clothes out. They are not yours to lend.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by hwichlaz

I'm not seeing how it's unsanitary as long as they are washed between uses....

I don't see a sanitary issue either but I do see an "eww" issue.

But I feel the same way about shoes and borrowing or sharing them.

[AmyKidsCo]

We're required to have extra clothes in the right sizes for the children we care for. I've also raided my own children's drawers when needed for extra clothes. My last resort would be to call the parents to bring clothes.

ITA about not lending out other children's clothes because they don't belong to me. I would feel awful if the parent didn't bring the borrowed clothing back. And as a parent I'd be mad if my child's clothing was lent to another child and it didn't come back.

[Mom2Two]

Originally Posted by Snowmom

I'd be pretty peeved if my child's spare clothing were used on another child without my permission.

My policies state that parents stock extras in the diaper bags, and they're pretty good with the spare undies, but with socks it's an ongoing issue. My families are great so I do some "reminding." I have extras here, but I also feel free to charge a fee for the loan if a parent was pushing things.

I'd call for pick up if a kid peed and they/I didn't have spares and if I didn't have good policies.

But um, I'd also be changing my policies pronto to require underwear. Kids aren't great at wiping and that extra layer on their tush seems a whole lot more hygienic.

[hwichlaz]

Originally Posted by Mom2Two

My policies state that parents stock extras in the diaper bags, and they're pretty good with the spare undies, but with socks it's an ongoing issue. My families are great so I do some "reminding." I have extras here, but I also feel free to charge a fee for the loan if a parent was pushing things.

I'd call for pick up if a kid peed and they/I didn't have spares and if I didn't have good policies.

But um, I'd also be changing my policies pronto to require underwear. Kids aren't great at wiping and that extra layer on their tush seems a whole lot more hygienic.

I have a basket of mismatched socks in the laundry room.....so that's what I pull from.

[KSDC]

Originally Posted by Blackcat31

I don't and won't keep spare clothing items here.

Children are REQUIRED to have a back up set of clothing.
A FULL set (including socks and underwear).

The operative word here is "required".

If a child is not fully prepared for the day, they are not allowed attendance for the day.

If however, a child did arrive without spare clothing and I didn't notice immediately and they needed spares during the day, I'd call the parent for immediate pick up.

Their (parent) failure to provide for their child, as required, is not my issue to manage.

This is my policy too. It is the parents job to clothe their child. I try very hard to not let parents pass their jobs onto me.

[Mom2Two]

Originally Posted by hwichlaz

I have a basket of mismatched socks in the laundry room.....so that's what I pull from.

Me too. But i still charge for it if I have to do it too often! he he

[Lil_Diddle]

As a parent, unless I gave permission I would be annoyed to see another child wearing anything of my child's. If the borrower somehow dirties or soils my child's clothes than my child is out or now I have laundry to do, or that reliable outfit that is always packed in my child's bag. Now it's my responsibility to launder and replace it for if my child has an accident. Or is the other child going to wear my child's clothes home? Will they remember to return them?

As a childcare provider, each child here has a personal space where they keep a change of clothes. So no need to bring every day or forget to bring a back pack all together. I also have a small supply of my own of pants, shorts, underwear and jackets that were garage sale finds just in case a child has more than one accident or spill, or the child previously wore their spares home and their parents just forgot to replace them (no blame because I'm very forgetful myself)

[springv]

We have all parents bring extra clothing for their child/children and if they don't have an extra set then we have extra clothing that a child can borrow. We ALWAYS make sure that all new parents know that when they enroll

[Hunni Bee]

Y'all would be surprised at how many centers will "borrow" a child's extra clothing if another child didn't have their own. I've seen multiple teachers do it at multiple jobs. I guess its easy to assume the clothing got "lost" in a large center. I have seen the parents wash and bring the borrowed clothing and it was just returned to the lender's cubby, though.

I'm not down with that myself though. I have always kept an emergency stash. My daughter has three sets of spares including shoes at her school plus I keep a set in my car.

[storybookending]

I take back what I said. My 10 month old didn’t have shoes yesterday because dad (see him only a few times a month) came during outside time the day before and took his shoes that usually get left here home. Mom does drop off and just assumed dad left the shoes the night before. I didn’t even notice until outside time. The ground is getting cold here so I put the 14 month olds extra shoes on him. He didn’t take them home. He could’ve gone in just the socks (it’s not that cold out) but I knew the parents wouldn’t mind. I guess I don’t feel the same about baby shoes as I do about toddler clothes. Hahaha.

[renodeb]

I have all kinds of spare clothes for the kids plus I ask for 2 sets per kid to be left here. In the past when kids didn't have clothes i have had clothes with my name written all over them to use. I have had to send home in t shirt and diaper before. Sometimes parents just can't take the hint. I never borrowed clothes from another child.