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  #1  
Old 10-18-2017, 07:13 PM
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Question Problematic Parent (Giving 2 Week Notice)

I am a daycare provider & I have a parent that is emotionally chaotic and all over the place. In the last couple of weeks she had been coming in to pick up herself child in a really bad mood and angry. I made an attempt to talk to her and see f she was okay or if she had anything to tell me because she seemed to be angry with me or someone here. She said no and acted “offended” by my attempt to check in with her.

She has been trying to pick fights with me as well as with other parents.when I address it with her she always acts like it’s all in everyone else’s head. I tend to be a little bit of a doormat but she has been really stressing me out & I want to give her a two week notice to take her child elsewhere. I’m afraid as to how to approach it because she does seem emotionally unstable and also because she has told me that she has reported someone to CPS just because they upset her.

Is there an “appropriate” protocol for me to follow when giving notice?

I’m in California.

Thanks.
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Old 10-19-2017, 01:22 AM
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Here are more threads on 2 week notice: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...=2+week+notice
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Old 10-19-2017, 03:17 AM
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How long have you had this dcm? Are these behaviors new to her?
I'd be extremely nervous about having her as a client, even with just the information about her reporting to CPS because she was upset by someone.
Just hand her a written termination notice, 2 weeks is normal, stating you can no longer meet her family's needs. And don't explain anything, just keep repeating that line to her. Send her to your local childcare resource and referral agency. Expect backlash because it doesn't sound like she'll accept it well. So have all your ducks in a row in case the state visits you. You might also want to warn the state about your situation; they may be very acquainted with this person.
Good luck!
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Old 10-19-2017, 07:30 AM
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Personally, I would terminate her immediately and wouldn't give any notice. I would do so not only for your immediate safety but for the safety of her child and the other children in care.

I wouldnt want her going off in anger when she is told so I would be one step ahead of her and I would contact your licensing agency and tell them you are terming a potentially volatile parent and want them to be aware of it before you notify her.

Then I would have another adult (spouse, neighbor, family friend etc) be present if you plan on terminating her in person. Tell her she is being terminated immediately due and that you are no longer willing to provide services to her. I'd make a comment about already having notified licensing.

Even more ideal is terminating her via phone or e-mail. I don't normally suggest doing so in that manner and prefer to communicate in person but in situations where a parent has the potential to be aggressive or volatile I would absolutely do what I could to ensure they do not come onto my property.

I wouldn't give her any more information than necessary as those types of parents tend to take one comment and focus on it as the root of their ire and I have been on the receiving end of an unpredictable parent before and would do what ever is necessary to avoid that again.
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Old 10-19-2017, 01:25 PM
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thank you all so much. I've been so nervous, literally sick to my stomach, having to do this. She sent her partner for drop off this morning, I guess she has a feeling what's coming because of our exchange from yesterday evening. I think a written notice would be ideal for me, knowing that I tend to be a sentimental person and would be tempted to cry (I know I'm lame). My heart just breaks for the baby

Its a sad situation but I feel like at this point I have no other choice. I plan on doing it Friday evening. Hope it goes well.
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Old 10-19-2017, 04:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
thank you all so much. I've been so nervous, literally sick to my stomach, having to do this. She sent her partner for drop off this morning, I guess she has a feeling what's coming because of our exchange from yesterday evening. I think a written notice would be ideal for me, knowing that I tend to be a sentimental person and would be tempted to cry (I know I'm lame). My heart just breaks for the baby

Its a sad situation but I feel like at this point I have no other choice. I plan on doing it Friday evening. Hope it goes well.
Wishing you good luck!
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Old 10-19-2017, 05:38 PM
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Definitely cut ties quickly and with as little said as possible. I just had a similar situation and it ended badly. This woman hired my teens to babysit her infant over the summer in my home. (I only let me teens babysit in my home so I can oversee things and protect my own kids from the crazies out there).

Anyway, when I told her it was time to start looking for someone else (this was supposed to be temporary) she flipped out, cursed, and screamed about how we were "ruining her life" and began making accusations and threats about calling CPS on us!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to tell her I was about to call the police to get her out of my house and when she left she assaulted my youngest child by shoving her forcibly to the side as she walked by.

Definitely tell her on the phone and say as little as possible. People like this will twist everything you say and try to use it against you.
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Old 10-20-2017, 06:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
thank you all so much. I've been so nervous, literally sick to my stomach, having to do this. She sent her partner for drop off this morning, I guess she has a feeling what's coming because of our exchange from yesterday evening. I think a written notice would be ideal for me, knowing that I tend to be a sentimental person and would be tempted to cry (I know I'm lame). My heart just breaks for the baby

Its a sad situation but I feel like at this point I have no other choice. I plan on doing it Friday evening. Hope it goes well.
I agree with Blackcat. There is no way I would give a two week notice to a parent who is behaving that way.
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Old 10-20-2017, 04:03 PM
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Today is Friday, how did it go?
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Old 11-06-2017, 09:29 PM
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Well, she came in with her partner and was acting all timid and afraid? Made it seem like it was all my fault and that she was the victim. I was annoyed but I told them that if they can't respect me, like I respect them, then they should find another daycare in which they feel comfortable. So I gave them the option of staying, but they decided it was easier to pull their child out of my daycare than to treat me with respect.

Last week was their last week here. Kinda sad but... I'm taking baby steps towards no longer being a doormat.

thank you for all of your feedback! Hope you all have a great week!
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Old 11-07-2017, 03:11 AM
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I'm so glad you'll not have to worry about this woman any longer. I hope she doesn't cause any more problems!!
Who knows what is going on with some people and their lives but working with children in your home, you certainly do NOT need volatile situations to erupt!!

Now onto the next dcf, who will be 100% wonderful!
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