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Old 12-19-2017, 04:43 AM
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Default Tell DCP about appearance change?

I'm probably overthinking this one but here goes.

Would you warn parents if you were making a noticeable change in your appearance? I'm growing a beard. Haven't had one in years and only 1 DCF was around the last time I had one. I normally don't shave daily (I break out if I do) so seeing me a bit stubbly isn't unusual. But it will take about 2 weeks to grow/ fill out to the point I want to keep it trimmed at. Right now it's at that scraggly stage. Combine that with red hair & pale skin and it's not a good look. I feel like on one hand I should tell DCPs "Hey- I'm not being lazy. I'm growing it out intentionally!" On the other hand it will be pretty obvious by the end of the week it's intentional.

Should I give them a heads up? Like I said I'm probably overthinking this one. Thanks
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Old 12-19-2017, 04:46 AM
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I wouldn't say anything unless someone brings it up. To me, it'd be the same as growing out your hair, getting your hair cut, wearing different styles, etc., etc. They like you just fine already, if a beard growing is changes that, then wth kind of dcps are they??
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Old 12-19-2017, 04:47 AM
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Are you getting nose or eyebrow piercings too?
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Old 12-19-2017, 05:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
Are you getting nose or eyebrow piercings too?


Right after I get the dozen or so tattoos I’ve made it 43 years without.

Nope- not happening.
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Old 12-19-2017, 06:14 AM
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If you're feeling uncomfortable with the scraggly look and it would make you feel better to say something, maybe it's worth a mention just to put your own mind at ease. If it doesn't bother you, I wouldn't say anything. Like Josie said, it's a lot like growing/cutting your hair or wearing something new.
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Old 12-19-2017, 06:19 AM
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I wouldn't. I don't warn my dcfs when I dye my hair or chop it.
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Old 12-19-2017, 07:58 AM
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Originally Posted by midaycare View Post
I wouldn't. I don't warn my dcfs when I dye my hair or chop it.
I wouldn't either.

It kind of feels like DCP are oblivious anyways and then you have the ones that notice a bit too much about me or my personal life so honestly, unless it effects the care of the kids, I wouldn't say a word to the parents.

I would however, talk with the kiddos about it. Just because they do notice that kind of thing.
If they mention it to their parents...cool. If not, oh well.

As long as you don't start greeting them at the door in your bathrobe, slippers and a clearly unbathed person, you're just fine.

Last edited by Blackcat31; 12-19-2017 at 08:05 AM.
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Old 12-19-2017, 08:00 AM
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Thanks. It will be fine in a week or so. Right now I just look like I should be in a home security company commercial.
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Old 12-19-2017, 09:02 AM
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If you have any really young kiddos I’d probably let their parents know, because those kids might be a bit upset at the change since they’ll be gone for a long weekend soon and you’re beard will REALLY fill in over that time.

Otherwise I wouldn’t worry about it.
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Old 12-19-2017, 11:23 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
I wouldn't either.

It kind of feels like DCP are oblivious anyways and then you have the ones that notice a bit too much about me or my personal life so honestly, unless it effects the care of the kids, I wouldn't say a word to the parents.

I would however, talk with the kiddos about it. Just because they do notice that kind of thing.
If they mention it to their parents...cool. If not, oh well.

As long as you don't start greeting them at the door in your bathrobe, slippers and a clearly unbathed person, you're just fine.
Yup, I would tell the kids. They noticed my hair cut before my dh so....
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Old 12-19-2017, 11:26 AM
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I would probably say something in a joking tone but only if it were a topic of conversation. So if they were talking about santa you might say “I’ll be growing my own santa beard soon, right now its crazy pirate” or “wish I had a thick beard like Santa....soon!” type thing.
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Old 12-19-2017, 12:20 PM
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If I was doing something like that, I'd just casually mention it to the dcks, but that's it. Whether or not they tell their parents wouldn't matter to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveA View Post


Right after I get the dozen or so tattoos I’ve made it 43 years without.

Nope- not happening.
I'm with ya there. No piercings, no tatoos EVER. Only 2 times anything will ever pierce my skin. Medical or slivers. Slivers are my main piercings.
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They are also our future.
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Old 12-19-2017, 01:16 PM
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Nope. I changed my hair color to purple several months ago and didn't tell anyone ahead of time. As long as my clothes cover the important bits my appearance is none of their business anyway.
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Old 12-19-2017, 01:56 PM
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DCG2 really noticed today- she's been touching the side of my face and scowling. I'll talk to the kids about it tomorrow when I have school agers all day. Thanks.
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Old 12-19-2017, 01:58 PM
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I wouldn't say anything either. It's in the normal range.
If you did feel like you needed to say something--like if you felt like it was really looking odd for a few days, just say something joking about excusing the growing-out stage or something.

Or put out a collection jar for Dave's razor fund.
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