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  #1  
Old 09-07-2018, 06:27 AM
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Default Mom Endless Goodbyes

One of my moms (first one here) comes exactly at 7:30 when I open. Comes in with her baby (12 months) and holds him and talks to me about mundane things which I reply very little, because i try to keep it short. She then holds her baby and tickles him, tries to show me his tricks, kisses him etc for about 8 to 10 minutes per morning. I just stand there and stare at them. I always pray for another child to come so I can start our day. Sometimes my 2nd child will come and she can see how fast he drops off. If you want to play with your baby, stay home an extra few minutes. ugh! Then when dad picks up he awkwardly stands there and holds the baby and doesn't say a whole lot of anything unless I start a conversation. He honestly stands there and holds him and it's terrible silence unless I say something. I hate it. I've been keeping the kids in the playroom the last couple of days and just bringing baby out when dad comes and passing him off and saying, well gotta go, can't leave them in there by themselves. Which works, but then yesterday the kids were right there with me and it was back to square one. help!
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  #2  
Old 09-07-2018, 06:42 AM
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Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
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Time for buh-bye outside.

This was my advice in 2012, still applies today.

"Switch to the Buh-Bye Outside Program.

AKA, Kiss-N-Go. Been around and effective since the 70's.

Lock doors, have children dressed and ready to go home....then meet them at the door.

Simple solution. Works wonders. Adults should never have access to other peoples children unless they are on the pick-up list."
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  #3  
Old 09-07-2018, 06:46 AM
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lovemykidstoo lovemykidstoo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
Time for buh-bye outside.

This was my advice in 2012, still applies today.

"Switch to the Buh-Bye Outside Program.

AKA, Kiss-N-Go. Been around and effective since the 70's.

Lock doors, have children dressed and ready to go home....then meet them at the door.

Simple solution. Works wonders. Adults should never have access to other peoples children unless they are on the pick-up list."
Oh yea, I've done the bye bye outside tons of times for kids that start throwing fits during drop off. It's nearly impossible for people to not see the other kids. The way my house is set up, you can see the living room and dining room by standing 1 foot inside the front door.
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  #4  
Old 09-07-2018, 06:55 AM
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Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
Oh yea, I've done the bye bye outside tons of times for kids that start throwing fits during drop off. It's nearly impossible for people to not see the other kids. The way my house is set up, you can see the living room and dining room by standing 1 foot inside the front door.
My clients wait on the front porch for me to bring them out. There is a camera and a driveway alarm that lets me know they are here. Most have the same schedule daily so I simply have their child ready to go and walk them out to their parent.

If they want to see the playroom workings without disruption they can watch discretely from the HUGE window in the very center of it on their way to the front porch or from the monitor in my living room (for behavioral plans ) while I do an activity with the group. A quick text to request and it is easy to manage, as long as their child does not see them. (The playroom is completely separate from my living areas)

If they want to tour the playroom to see and touch they can schedule a conference to do so and go over their concerns. I don't let parents have physical access to other peoples kids.
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Old 09-07-2018, 06:57 AM
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I've found that parents hear you but they don't "listen".

Instead of saying anything or dropping hints that you have things to do or that mom/dad need to get to work, physically take the baby, say "Wave goodbye to mommy! Have a nice day!" and then turn around and walk in the opposite direction.

.....even if that means going to stand in the corner of the living room where the parent can't see you. Walk away.

The parent usually leaves immediately. Rinse and repeat.

I've found my body language actually gets the point across much better and much more clearly than words at times.
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Old 09-07-2018, 07:17 AM
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This is how my morning with mom would go:

Mom: walks in gushing on baby
Me: walks over to entrance, hold out my hands, "ok, I'm ready for Sally." Hold baby on one hip, open front door, "See you later mom. Have a good day."

Mom: "Oh, Sally, can I get one more kiss and snuggle?"
Me: "We need to start our day, she'll save extra snuggles for you this afternoon. Bye."

If it lingered after that, she'd need a blunt "Drop offs and pick ups need to be quick. It creates unneeded stress for the child to prolong your departure and keeps me from my duties. If you need extra time to say goodbye, please do so outside. Thank you for understanding."
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Old 09-07-2018, 08:06 AM
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For the dad that awkwardly lingers..i have a dad like that , he stands there like he wants to say something but doesnt know what to say. So what i say is DCB had a good day! *looks at dcb* ill see you tomorrow, have a good night!
And then i turn around and go back to the other children.
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  #8  
Old 09-07-2018, 08:30 AM
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Originally Posted by MomBoss View Post
For the dad that awkwardly lingers..i have a dad like that , he stands there like he wants to say something but doesnt know what to say. So what i say is DCB had a good day! *looks at dcb* ill see you tomorrow, have a good night!
And then i turn around and go back to the other children.
I do this with most of my dcd's! In fact most do not come through the door at all. The kids are usually dressed and ready to go.
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  #9  
Old 09-07-2018, 08:45 AM
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Thanks guys, I appreciate the advice! It's always nice to get fresh ideas. It is just awkward. I mean if any of these people actually were conversing with me it would be one thing, but I have 2 dads that hold their kids, look at them and really don't say a thing, not even to their kids. They like just stare at them (they're both a year or younger). It's so dang uncomfortable. Then the mom that sits there and talks and plays with her son. Then she talks sooo loud and my husband works 2nd shift so he's still sleeping. None of them come more than 2 feet into my front door, not into the playroom or anywhere else, but still ugh! I stand there with my arms crossed and say nothing. Just leave!
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  #10  
Old 09-07-2018, 02:10 PM
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I always reach for child/baby and take them away from parents and then start walking away from the parents saying bye X, have a great day. It works for me. Older kids I take their hands.
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  #11  
Old 09-07-2018, 09:40 PM
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For drop off, always have something you need to do. "Well, Mom. Have a good day, I need to get those dishes finished / that table wiped down / breakfast started before the rest of the kids arrive" .. reach out for DCK. If that doesn't work, try "hey, if you're going to be a minute I have some setting up I need to get done. Just call for me when you're ready" and start to walk away. If she says she's ready, reach out for the kid and say "come on DCK, can you be my big helper? Have a good day, Mom!" walk away.

For pick up, I just say "no poops/ he pooped, good/ bad appetite, good nap. Have a good night!" Wave, start walking away. That's generally enough.
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  #12  
Old 09-08-2018, 04:41 AM
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My provider recently got one of the those Dutch doors install. Some customers she has just pass their baby over the door.. Guess this is why lolllll


Also please correct your system, Michigan is most certainly on Lake Erie!
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  #13  
Old 09-09-2018, 07:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
My provider recently got one of the those Dutch doors install. Some customers she has just pass their baby over the door.. Guess this is why lolllll


Also please correct your system, Michigan is most certainly on Lake Erie!
What system?
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  #14  
Old 09-09-2018, 07:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
What system?
You have to answer a question to post unregistered
More than likely it was a spelling or capitalization error
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  #15  
Old 09-09-2018, 08:17 AM
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lovemykidstoo lovemykidstoo is offline
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
You have to answer a question to post unregistered
More than likely it was a spelling or capitalization error
Oh got ya lol. Thought what did i miss haha
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