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  #1  
Old 11-17-2017, 09:20 AM
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Default Need Some Advice Please

Hi everyone, I was a member here and still have my login info, but haven't posted in forever. I miss you all and the amazing advice, and I find myself in desperate need of it. I never ever thought I'd be posting this but I was just diagnosed with cervical cancer yesterday.
Can anyone please help me figure out what do do with my daycare?

I have a group daycare, and I have an employee who has been with me full time for the last 3 years. She's amazing. I've already told her and she is willing to do anything to help me. I was considering letting her be in charge of daycare (she has done this on several occasions, including for 4 weeks while I was on vacation last winter). She's very capable of handling taking money to the bank, fixing lunch, cleaning, and teaching. She rocks.

My dilemma is that my major stubborn streak involves never wanting to show weakness to the daycare families. I've never divulged personal info to them, and I always have a "game face" on at all times. How do I share this info with them? Over all the years (forgive me if this sounds jaded) I have learned that while they do have fondness for me, they will mainly want to know how this directly impacts them. People are generally most interested in what affects their daily life.

Should I wait until the cancer is staged and I have a timeline I can share? I'm looking at a radical hysterectomy at a minimum, with potential for radiation and chemo. I'll be down and out for quite a while, which is where the new employee comes in. I am confident my assistant can take the reins while I recuperate, but what will the families think of this?

I'm really asking, has anyone else gone through a major illness and came through with their business still intact? Challenges/successes? I appreciate any help, I'm just reeling here.
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Old 11-17-2017, 09:26 AM
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Ariana Ariana is offline
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Yes for sure parents only care about their childcare. I know personally one woman who had to close her daycare because her families were not very understanding about her and her illness.

I have never gone through this situation before but I definitely know that you will need lots of time to recover and heal. I would just let parents know that the assistant will be taking over for some of the tasks until you recover fully. I would be vague about your illness and vague about what the assistant will be doing. Basic message to parents is - childcare is covered. They will be happy with that.

I am so sorry you are going through all of this . :hugs:
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Old 11-17-2017, 09:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ariana View Post
Yes for sure parents only care about their childcare. I know personally one woman who had to close her daycare because her families were not very understanding about her and her illness.

I have never gone through this situation before but I definitely know that you will need lots of time to recover and heal. I would just let parents know that the assistant will be taking over for some of the tasks until you recover fully. I would be vague about your illness and vague about what the assistant will be doing. Basic message to parents is - childcare is covered. They will be happy with that.

I am so sorry you are going through all of this . :hugs:

yes.

First of all, I'm so sorry for your current medical issues and I wish you a quick and speedy recovery. If I was in your position, I would be interviewing now to hire another FT assistant.

I would notify families that due to personal reasons, you will be hiring another staff member and will be working on a limited basis in the near future. You are confident that amazing assistant can run things smoothly, as she has on (winter vacations, breaks, etc) and this will not impact the child care at all.

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Old 11-17-2017, 11:18 AM
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I'm freaking out a little. I just placed an ad for another employee, and I should be ok monetarily as long as no families pull out. Thank you for your kind words of support. I am having dinner with my (actual) parents tonight to tell them. I'm only 32, this is going to be tough to wrap my brain around. My DH is a freaking rockstar, and I am so lucky to have him.
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Old 11-17-2017, 12:36 PM
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I was diagnosed with cervical cancer 1b1 when I was pregnant with my daughter. She is now almost 3. I had a hysterectomy when she was 6 months old. I was lucky and didn't need to do further treatment. What was difficult was recovery from the surgery itself. They Will most likely have to do the long vertical incision so they can remove lymph nodes to get an accurate stage. If you need support and someone to talk to I'm available.
The most important thing is your health and getting better. I hope you can find some extra help . You may not want to share info immediately until you get a better picture of what you are looking at recovery wise.
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Old 11-17-2017, 12:37 PM
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I was also 32 when I was diagnosed.
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Old 11-17-2017, 03:23 PM
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I had a tumor removed from my shoulder last year. Things were very much up in the air because they had no idea what it was and what would need to be done so I didn't have much beyond basics to tell my families. I was honest with families about what was going on and told them what I knew at each stage and they were all very supportive and I didn't lose any families over it. Have your plan in place for your absence when you tell them. That way they know things are taken care of while you're being treated. And most of all... put anything negative aside and focus on you and your health and getting better.
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Old 11-17-2017, 05:40 PM
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I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis and I'll be sending positive prayers your way for a good outcome.

I continued to work through a year of breast cancer treatment a couple of years ago. During the entire year I only closed for 16 days and I still lost half of my families because of it. I don't have an assistant though, so you may not have that problem. I waited until I knew everything I could about my treatment and what it would entail before sharing anything with my daycare families.
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Old 11-18-2017, 04:48 PM
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I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

I don’t have personal experience but my mom’s next door neighbor did dc for many years. She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and because she had to do chemo, her doc told her she should not be around kids because her immune system was going to be compromised.

Saying a prayer for you that it’s not very serious and that you’ll require minimal treatment.
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